Red Light Deux
by Nature9000
Summary: After escaping the red light district herself, Sam has devoted herself to rescuing the women trapped in that life. While working at an internship she comes across Trina Vega, the daughter of a police chief and someone whose stirs old memories for Sam. She becomes determined to help, but soon finds a monumental task ahead of her when Trina's family begins to self-destruct.
1. The First Client

Red Light Deux

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N FIRST: This does discuss a mature subject, so if you cannot handle a story with an adult mindset, turn away now. If you can, then read on.

A/N: This is, in a way a continuation of an old story "Red Light". You don't have to _know_ or even follow "Red Light" to get this. I'll have momentary flashbacks where important. I want to do it in Sam's perspective primarily because it'll be the counselor's perspective that will bring further intrigue, rather than Trina's perspective. Doing it in the client would make the story similar to the other. Do read.

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><p>Chapter 1 (The First Client)<p>

The familiar smell of smoke filled the twenty year old blonde's nostrils as she attempted to focus on the clacking sounds of her fingers striking the keyboard. Her eyes darted around the musty restaurant and her lungs swelled, filling up from some invisible penetrator.

Her first thought questioned why she had chosen to work on her paper in a crowded sports bar, which was one of the worst places for her to be after everything had been said and done. Yet it was also the one place she could find solace away from Cat. The innocent redhead would never come near one of these places.

The military had given Sam the one opportunity for a normal life, giving her training to be a counselor for people who had struggled with the life that she and Carly had fallen into. She was working on a paper she was entitling _Hausse de la Cendre_, which was French for 'Rise from the Ash', and was told as part of her internship she needed to find a client-someone that wanted help.

Unfortunately this meant she would have to frequent the familiar dark streets, the strip clubs, and various shady locations. From her own knowledge she knew well how to find a stripper, a prostitute, or even so much as a porn star. Many were in the business because they wanted to be, yes, but the great majority of them were like her or like Carly had been, and they had very little choice or opportunity to get out.

They'd been disowned by family, they'd been abused or with no way of escape. Maybe they got hooked on drugs, or were forced into the business, or were just simply sex addicts. Had it not been for Valerie's kindness, she may never have survived, and like so many she would have self-destructed when her family found out and pushed her out.

A piercing laugh jolted Sam from her thoughts and she threw her head up, lifting her hands ever so slightly above her keys. Her fingers curled inwards as her eyes danced on the drunken men at the bar, gawking at some woman sitting at the other end.

She trailed her gaze to the phone buzzing on her table. Cat was sending her text messages, asking where she was at even though she was busy. She pressed her lips together and turned the phone over with a heavy sigh.

There was a missed call and voicemail from her fiancé, Derek, still overseas. He left a voicemail to let her know he'd call the next day and see how her time was in LA. The reason for her move to Los Angeles was due to nobody knowing her here, unlike Seattle. Where her father had done all he could to try and get as much of her videos off the websites, the damage had still been done and few people wanted to give her opportunities in Seattle.

"Cleveland and Associates," Sam typed out the final line before getting ready to take a break. "My current place of internship on the military base. I am currently seeking out someone to extend services to, but have been unsuccessful thus far in my search. It is far easier to let them come to you than for you to impose services, but thus far I have not received any viable calls for the flyers I have been handing out."

With a heavy sigh, Sam closed down the laptop and began moving it to the case. She closed her eyes and leaned back, letting her mind drift back to Carly. Her best friend had moved with her husband Doug, and her son, to Italy for a shot at a new life. Carly often said she'd come back to the states one day, and Sam hoped for the best, but her friend had suffered far worse than she had and likely would not feel comfortable returning to the states for a long time.

"What the hell is Alice thinking?" Alice Cleveland was her instructor and her boss, a woman she very much admired and respected. However some of the things she suggested to Sam were a little on the unorthodox side, and as good as thinking out of the box was, it was hardly the best thing to do. "Yeah you have to make yourself available to help, but you can't force it. They have to want it." The only way she and Carly ever found help was because they wanted to get out of that life. It started out as a way to make money, then became an addiction, then a lifestyle they couldn't get away from until they hit rock bottom. It was her goal to help girls not to hit rock bottom.

The sad fact remained that most times it wasn't until a person crashed and hit the very bottom before they ever wanted to get out, and many times it would be too late.

"It's all too fresh." Sam packed up her things and grabbed her phone to call Cat. When the girl answered, she was speaking in a worried tone. "Relax Cat, you know I'm working."

"Why don't you ever work at home? I made dinner."

"I have to make myself available to clients." She hated to say it like that, for the memories that wound up stirring a violent sensation into her heart. It was hard for her to think of any better wording. What made it worse was that she didn't want to tell Cat for fear of the girl asking questions.

Namely, she still feared the judgmental attitude that came from people who just didn't understand. She knew her friend, if she learned of her past, would never call her a whore or a slut, but Cat would still look at her in an entirely new light.

"Why won't you tell me about your job, Sam? I don't know who Cleveland and Associates are, other than a counseling clinic on the base my brother goes to." Her elder brother was a good friend of Derek's, and the man had been responsible for being the first to offer Sam a chance.

Sam hung her laptop carrier case loosely at her legs and started for the door, glancing over her shoulders one last time at the girl sitting at the bar. Her stomach clenched as she visualized herself sitting in place of the woman. Broken, fragile, hurt. Her eyebrows meshed together and the corners of her lips sank as her heart began to pound. "Maybe one day I'll give you the full details."

"You don't trust me?"

"It isn't that, Cat. Some things are just…not something I can discuss for personal reasons." The television was playing beside the woman, it was set on Channel 6 News and was celebrating the newly appointed Police Chief-David Vega. His daughter was on stage, singing a song in his honor, and his wife was walking arm and arm with him. Sam tilted her head to the right and raised an eyebrow. "Doesn't your friend have a sister?"

"Tori? Yeah, but Trina's never around anymore. I mean it makes sense with how ignored she was the last few years."

"Ignored?"

"Yeah, she used to be favored I think. Tori always says how much their dad loved Trina growing up, but then Tori started to be the one everyone focused on. Trina faded away-I remember Jade always told her that nobody liked her, and the look in her eyes…It was scary."

Her heart broke as she focused her attention on the father. She felt a strong connection, but likely due to the fact that her own father had the same name and career as this man. It created an enormous tension in her chest and nearly toppled her as her mind flashed back to her experiences.

When she and Carly got involved in becoming porn stars and prostitutes, the common ground was money, but to Sam it was also about the attention. She didn't feel like she got the attention, not where Melanie was concerned. "Look in whose? Trina's?"

"Yep. Dull, lifeless, almost like she didn't care anymore. Nobody really cared to look long enough to notice it, but after a few years, I think Trina just lost a little bit of that light. I think she gave up." She heard a pause and turned away. Her hand moved up to her chest and her eyes quivered as the fierce pounding of her heart stabbed her. "Why do you ask?"

"No reason. If you see Tori again, could you ask her if she'd send Trina over?"

"Why? Do you want to counsel her or something?"

"No, I just want to see that look you're talking about." If it was anything like she thought it was, then she would know. She had that same look at one point, but Carly had it much worse. Where Valerie and Jonah saved Sam from the streets, Carly was more addicted and didn't want the help at first. Eventually, Carly ended up where many prostitutes did, in the middle of gang abuse. When they finally found her and rescued her, there was absolutely no hope left in her eyes.

Thankfully they rescued her in time to nurture her back, but as Carly so often told her, she still had very vivid and colorful nightmares and memories that brought her to her knees.

"I just know people like that, Cat." She pushed open the door of the bar and waited as her friend let out a sad moan. "People who lose sight of the positive when they've been through something so much that they can no longer feel hope of being rescued." It always took a long way to get there, especially since that point was literally rock bottom.

For Carly, and for herself, of course they enjoyed the sexual activities at first. They loved it and didn't want to stop, especially because it gave them attention and made them feel like people gave a shit. Then reality sank in, nobody cared, men treated them like third class citizens. During a shoot, they had no real say about what went on, they could try but the men would so often demand things done the way _they_ wanted it.

"Something to remember, Cat. Inherently, people are not evil, they are not bad. People do bad things, and then there's the lost-who become the victims of the people who make bad decisions." She closed the door and stepped out on the sidewalk, her eyes followed a green Toyota truck speeding down the bleak street. "Yet, the victim makes that decision at the same time. The lost seek out attention, craving it, and they stumble across these people who do not have the best intentions and usually are out for themselves."

"Okay?"

"Because the lost are in fact, lost, they're vulnerable to manipulation-not realizing that the person they're interacting with is less than good-hearted. After being sullied so many times, the lost lose sight of the light they once had-usually comes after realization that the person they found as well did not care for them, and therefore cemented their entire reason for seeking out that attention at the first place."

"I understand."

"You'd like to know part of what I do, and that's it. I counsel those people-I try to be the person that can rescue them." She heard a voice to her right and looked over to see a scantily dressed woman with brown curls walking towards a flashy red sports car. This woman was dressed in black lingerie, her brown eyes were sharp and emotionless at the same time, and the corners of her lips were digging into her cheeks.

She furrowed her brow and took a step closer, watching as skinhead in the driver's seat jerked his thumb to the passenger seat. This woman looked familiar, but Sam couldn't place a finger on who or where she'd seen this person before. "Hey Cat?"

"Yeah?"

"Could you text me a picture of your friend and her sister again?"

She pulled the phone away from her ear after hearing a slight buzz within seconds. Her eyes drifted to the phone and she pulled up the photo. What she saw stopped her heart in a single instance and turned her blood cold.

As her fears and suspicions were suspected, she turned her eyes to the car, cringing when she saw the man put his arm around the woman's shoulders. "Trina Vega…"

Thinking fast, she made her way to her car-which she usually took when carrying her laptop, as opposed to the motorcycle. Her eyes remained frozen on the car in front of her as she started it up. "Cat, I'm going to let you go. I don't know when I'm going to be home."

"Aw, Sam!"

"Sorry, Cat. Something came up." Her heart was racing as visions of her past came seeping in. This was a woman much like herself, someone with a high profile father and a possibly negligent mother. A woman with a perfect sibling.

If she could reach out and help this girl, that would be something for her to truly be proud of. Only she didn't want this to be just for the accomplishment. If this girl had an experience anything like her own, she wanted to keep her from traveling down that same path.

Only if she wanted the help, though. Yet a no didn't mean Sam would give up. She clicked off the phone and slanted her eyes while gently grasping the steering wheel. The car before her started up and Sam cracked her neck to the right.

"Hopefully, I just found my first client."

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><p>Obviously the struggle is to get the person to want help, and here the "client" clearly won't want help or see anything wrong at first. Understand the lifestyle is a very serious and very real issue (Touched on in "Red Light", clearly this is done from the counselor's perspective and won't be a series of sessions in an office). Many people get in this life for reasons of money, attention, sometimes they just like it, and many people find once they get involved it's hard to escape. What we'll see in this is Sam attempting to convince Trina of the risks and trying to be able to get her to see the dangers before it's too late, as unfortunately happens with so many people-and this all the while trying not to force help upon her. Please, as you read this, read it with an open mind.<p> 


	2. To Live a Nightmare

Red Light Deux

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: This is, in a way a continuation of an old story "Red Light". You don't have to _know_ or even follow "Red Light" to get this. I'll have momentary flashbacks where important. I want to do it in Sam's perspective primarily because it'll be the counselor's perspective that will bring further intrigue, rather than Trina's perspective. Doing it in the client would make the story similar to the other. Do read.

A/N: This is more descriptive to give you an idea of where this will head once it kicks off

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><p>Chapter 2 (To Live a Nightmare)<p>

Sam tapped her fingers gently on the leather steering wheel of her car, studying the dark road before her. She was parked at the curb beside a cracked building with a steel door. The only source of light came from a dim lit lamp hanging above the door.

Her stomach churned violently when she heard music being played from a nearby radio. Her eyes moved to the rearview mirror and studied a man leaning loosely against the wall with a cigarette in his mouth. This man was playing a song from _Porcelain and the Tramps_, a band which she hated more than any other musician she had to suffer through. It was due to the flashback-inducing songs they had which reminded her of a time she could never truly forget.

After closing the windows of her car, Sam leaned back and shifted her gaze onto the steel door. There were several dents as well as tiny holes that resembled bullet holes. Her heart sank as she thought about this girl and what she would say to her.

"I don't know if she wants help." Sam struck the record button on her handheld recorder, it was crucial for notes. She took a deep breath and scrunched her forehead. "Her family situation is a lot like mine, based on what Cat tells me, it's going to be difficult not to put some personal feelings on this-but I think that's going to be a driving factor in helping this girl."

It was one thing that Trina's father was also a very high profile police officer like her own dad, but the issue here was that it sounded like the man didn't care about his eldest daughter. Her own father _did_ care about her, but it had been hard for her to see it. "I cannot scare her away from help, but I cannot force it the subject."

She was well aware of how it would feel for someone to just start talking about the dangers of the lifestyle she was in. Immediately it could close a window. It could be good to introduce her as a roommate and friend of Cat's, but she didn't know exactly how good the relationship the girl had with her.

The car began to vibrate with startling sensation so she turned her head only to see the man turning up the volume on his radio. _"I'll show you what it means to control you. Cause I'm the fucking King of the World!"_ Bile rose in her throat as the image of a stranger hovering over her shot through her. She put her fingers to her forehead and shook her head.

With every tap of the man's foot and every bounce of his head, Sam's body would tense. Her eyebrows curved down in the middle and her teeth clenched. Her fingers grasped the handle of the door and started to push it open, which caused the music to blast fully in her ears.

The song shifted to the band's _Red Light District_ and her heart pulsed a flash of adrenaline and venom into her blood. She clicked off the recorder and marched towards the man, keeping her fiery glare on him.

He turned his eyes up to her and smiled. "Hello. Can I help you with something?" She grabbed the cord to the radio and ripped it from the outside outlet. The man's eyes widened as she grabbed the radio. "Hey! I was listening to that."

"Now you're not." The man threw his hands up and took a step back. Her nostrils flared and her chest expanded slowly, then fell. Each slow breath calmed and relaxed her nerves. She set the radio down on the ground and dropped the cord. "Sorry. Not my call, just…try not to blast it please? I'm waiting on someone. That band is very unsettling to hear."

The man chuckled softly and grabbed his radio. "Right." She watched as he walked away, muttering under his breath. Sam scratched the left side of her head and cringed at the smoky texture.

In the distance she saw another street worker standing beneath a lamp post. Her lips pressed together and her eyes softened. There were so many people that judged these people harshly, it broke her heart to see the poor treatment.

There wasn't much in the world she had compassion for, that was something that remained somewhat similar to her younger days. Her aggressive nature had gone down tremendously, but to the majority of people she still was hardened. The ones that did see most of her compassion, aside from those closest, were these workers.

It was known she couldn't save them all, and not every one of them wanted help, but at the very least it was possible to work with those that would.

Sam turned away with a wistful sigh and started for her car. The sound of a latch clicking stopped her in her tracks. She watched with wide eyes as the skinhead man opened the steel door and walked out. His muscular frame and bald head was lit by the lamp light glinting off the pools of sweat building on his slimy figure.

He was wearing pants with his shirt tied in the belt. His hand clutched a piece of rubber with white fluid dripping from it. Sam's stomach clenched and a painful ache spread across her chest as she watched the man slink towards his car while dropping the condom down into a gutter.

She put her hand to her stomach and felt her body shiver. "Jesus. Push through it." Her teeth clenched and her nostrils spread out to release a large breath. Her eyebrows lifted when she saw Trina walking out and counting a large sum of money in her hands.

A lump formed in her throat as she recalled the first statement told to her by someone after her very first time. Spoken with sharp snide, someone asked if it was worth it. She pushed the terrible memory from her mind and stepped forward, nearly bumping into Trina.

The girl lifted her head and stepped back, her eyes grew large and her mouth hung open. Her red lipstick was smudged and greasy, her hair was a mess and her clothes had been cut. The panties she wore were had a long gash that the girl made no attempt to cover. "I'm sorry," Trina stated, "I wasn't looking."

"It's okay." The first person that ran into her knew she'd been from iCarly and pointed it out. She was terrified of that recognition and didn't want this girl to feel the same way. "Strange part of town this is, huh?"

"Strange?" Trina moved her hair over her shoulder and shrugged. "I'm used to it." Studying the woman's eyes, she could see no emotion towards the subject. Yet there was a tiny glint of sadness amid all the darkness. How long had she been in this life? "You're not a worker are you? You don't look like someone that should be around here…"

"Used to be, but I'm not in the life anymore." Trina's eyebrows closed in and she glanced down at the money. The girl's father was a police chief. Money certainly was no object. However a worker in the sex industry didn't always work for money. This was mental, psychological, and Sam could see the same look in the girl's eyes that connected them. "I was more into videos, though…" Her voice broke and she silenced herself abruptly.

Trina's gaze shot back to her and she curved the corner of her lip up a slight amount. "I've done one or two videos but I don't know if I like it." Sam furrowed her brow and crossed her arms as Trina stuffed the money between her breasts. "Not like anyone would know who I am though, right?"

She flattened her lips and leaned back as her arms folded across her chest. "What do you mean?" Trina walked past her and waved her hand in the air.

"Well Daddy's just been promoted to a big shot position, Mom became a head nurse at the hospital and my sister's on every screen in Los Angeles despite not getting any record contracts. They're all seen more, so it's just that easy for me to do whatever. Right? I mean nobody notices what I do so nobody's going to complain, I'm in the clear."

"It could come around. Do you wonder what might happen if anyone found out?" She could better diagnose any mental or emotional disorders this way, if any existed at all. Chances were likely that Bipolar Disorder would be a given, but she wasn't going to make any diagnoses.

Trina stopped and looked over her shoulder with a frown. "I don't want my dad to be shamed, I guess. If people knew my sister had a sibling that was doing what I do, it could ruin her."

Sam smiled inwardly and moved her hands to her hips. "Maybe." It was good that the girl did appear to care. This made it all that much easier for her to be reasoned with. "I remember when I was in the industry, I didn't think my family would care."

"I could agree to that, I guess. It feels good, though."

"Does it?"

"Sure." She studied Trina's downward expression and huffed lightly. The girl did not look to be convinced of what she was saying, but then, Sam needed to choose her words carefully. "I mean yeah it feels weird doing it with different people, but there's a payout. When a guy pays attention to me, I like it, I feel…I don't know, alive?" Trina's mouth twisted and her cheekbones faltered. "Then again, there's really not much else out there for me. I could never get a boyfriend, can't go anywhere without hearing people talk about my sister or my father, so yeah this is it."

Hearing that, Sam had to assume Trina either hadn't been in this for long or she had not yet begun to feel the ramifications of sexual degradation. Each person was different, however, so there was no real way to measure just how or if Trina would ever feel like she was being degraded in any way.

Trina met her gaze and moved her hand up to her chin, sliding her thumb across with a huff. "Where have I seen you before?"

"Used to be involved with a webshow before I got into prostitution and pornography." It pained her to be open about her past, but it was through this openness that she was making a connection with Trina. Therefore she needed to do so and to push off the pain it created. "Up in Seattle."

"What brings you down here?"

"Career opportunities are better here." She shrugged and looked off to the side. "Turns out Seattle's not too happy to give jobs to former sex workers." She hated the term, but it was better than 'prosititute'.

"Well. If you're trying to get away from that life, hanging around this area won't do you much good." A weak chuckle fell from Sam's lips and she nodded gently.

"That is true." She pushed her trembling hands into her pockets to conceal them. Trina lifted her eyebrows and studied her with curiosity. "Truth is I was meeting a client-I am a counselor." The girl's lips parted and she turned around with a wry laugh.

"Good to know. I guess that'd explain why you're down in the shadier place. I'll let you know, I don't think I need any 'help'"

"I didn't think I did either until I hit rock bottom, but I'm not preaching to you, so don't worry." It may very well take for Trina what it took for her to realize she was in trouble. Sam hoped that wouldn't come because she knew how painful it was to be fully disowned by those you love.

Granted her family didn't disown her the way Carly's had. She had only been kicked out until she 'turned around'. It hurt just as much as it hurt Carly to hear Spencer say she was no sister of his.

She watched as Trina started to walk off. The girl stopped several feet away and turned around slightly. "Question." Sam inhaled slowly and felt her eyes grow moist. "What's it like at the bottom? When you hit that low, what was it like?"

"Hell." She exhaled as Trina's eyes dropped down. "Like a nightmare you can't wake from, a night you will remember as long as you live."

"Oh." Trina lifted her eyes back up and squinted before walking around the corner.

She was so much like herself, so much like Carly, Sam couldn't help but feel a fire growing inside of her. Trina may not feel like she needed help, but there was still a little of her left from what Sam could see. She needed to reach this part, and if anything, make Trina start to _think_ about the path she was on. It was the best way to get someone to seek help, to have them realize for themselves how deadly the journey was.

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><p>So that gives you an idea where this will head, somewhat. I shall make this tasteful as possible, but also realistic as I can.<p> 


	3. Psychoanalyzed

Red Light Deux

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

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><p>Chapter 3 (Psychoanalyzed)<p>

"I'm home." The scent of chicken tantalized Sam's nostrils, drawing her further into the house. Cat was sitting on the couch with her laptop. The girl looked up at her with a concerned smile and motioned to the dish on the counter.

"I made orange chicken, had to keep it on the stove to keep it warm, but it should be fine if you're ready to eat." Cat folded her arms and crossed her legs. "You know the girl we were babysitting today?"

"Ruth?" Sam removed her jacket and hung it up. She felt guilty for having had to leave Cat alone to babysit. It would have been much easier to just tell her the truth of the matter, but she didn't know Cat would respond to 'I once was a porn star' coupled with the fact that she was counseling people in the sex industry. "What about it?"

"She stumbled on one of those bad sites." Her heart stopped for a moment and she turned slowly to the girl. Sam put on the best nonchalant gaze she could muster, but now a new fear was climbing into her throat. Her father, as well as Douglas did the best they could to remove any and all traces of _'Samantha Golden'_, that persona was gone, but there could still be one or two traces floating around somewhere on the internet.

The thought of Cat discovering it on her own was horrifying, but one of the kids they babysat would be worse. "How long was she on there before you closed out?" Sweat trickled down her neck and her eyes drifted to the thermostat, the temperature was lower than it felt in the room.

Cat swept her bangs away from her forehead and furrowed her brow. "Are you alright Sam? You look a little pale." Sam cleared her throat and closed her eyes.

"I'm fine. Just tell me what happened." She made her way over and sat down beside her friend. Her eyes hesitated before glancing at the screen, all that was there was the desktop background. "Do you know how to put locks on the laptop"

"Not really." Cat moved her hands to the laptop keyboard and shrugged. "I think Ruth was on the site for a small amount of time, she started crying and told me she meant to go to some game website and wound up mistyping."

Sam breathed a sigh of relief and moved her hand up to her chest. "That's usually how it happens. You closed it out I'm sure?"

"Of course, I don't want to see that stuff. It's sick."

"Some of the people in that life are forced into it."

Cat smiled gently and quickly shook her head. "I have nothing against the women in there." Sam raised an eyebrow and studied the redhead closely. She was curious to hear more, but wanted to be careful not to ask too many questions that may reveal anything about her past. "I know most of those girls don't really want to be in that life. A lot do, I'm sure, but for the most part…well I don't know, what attracts girls to that lifestyle?"

"Addiction." That was what hit Carly the hardest and made it more difficult for the girl to leave than Sam. "Then once they get involved they don't think there's anyone that can help, and the further in they go the darker it gets. They might even be disowned by their family, see the life as the only thing that can help them get by."

"Sounds like a nightmare, really. What causes people to even get involved?"

"Money usually. Or a demon offering them a way out of whatever they struggle with." For Carly it had been more a money issue, but for Sam it was a matter of attention.

"I guess you know some of this from counseling." Cat opened a dialog box on the computer and frowned. "So how do we get these things blocked? I don't want Dice or Goomer deciding to use my computer for anything if they come around."

"I don't think you're at risk of that, but it's still a good idea." Sam took the laptop and started to bring up the privacy options. She also wanted to find and install one of the protection software, such as _K-9 Web Protection._ It is one of the most accurate and risk-free protection software out there.

"Are you doing anything tomorrow, by the way?"

"I don't think so. Why?" She tucked her hair behind her ear and glanced at Cat. Her fingers hovered over the keys and curled into her palm. "Need me to help you with something?"

"I'm hanging out with Jade and the others, and I don't really feel like it. I don't want to turn them down, but you know how it is."

"So you want me to hang out with you and your friends?"

"Please?" This could be a good opportunity to get to know the crew while also gathering their thoughts on the Vega family. She curved the corner of her lip up and pat her friend on the back. "I guess I can go along." The more intel, the better.

"Oh thank you." Cat leaned back and her body relaxed. "You don't know how much it means to me. It isn't that I don't like them, it's just that I don't really have any other friends."

"Sure Cat, I understand."

The sun was high the next morning and the temperature was warmer than she thought it'd be. She still wore long sleeved shirts and longer pants, but that was in her style. Anything less and more revealing felt uncomfortable to her, and she still detested when people eyed her-so it was crucial to her that she not wear the tank tops and shorts that most girls wore these days.

Cat led the way to the table where her friends were waiting. Jade and Tori both wore spaghetti strap shirts and a short pair of shorts and skirt, respectively. Andre had on a short sleeved white t-shirt and pair of black trousers.

She had to turn away from him as his appearance, even with his hair up, reminded her of a man she'd slept with. It formed a nauseous pit in her gut, and forced a vivid memory to resurface, but she remained stoic and pushed away the memory.

Beck looked better since he was wearing a light denim jacket over a similar t-shirt and a pair of jeans.

"So this is your roommate?" Tori asked pulling her hair back. Sam felt the girl's eyes studying her and watched as they trailed up and down her body. "You do realize it's almost a hundred degrees out, right?"

"I didn't feel like wearing short stuff." Sam took her seat beside Cat and closed her eyes when Andre said hello. The image of the man was much older than the teenager was, and his hair hadn't been in dreads. "It is good to meet you guys. I've already met Jade and Robbie, of course."

It was good to see Freddie again when he wound up coming down. He was still with Melanie, thankfully, and it wasn't too awkward as she feared it might have been. The fact that Melanie was her sister was the only real reason he remained a friend of hers after having discovered her lifestyle.

"Good to see you again," Robbie waved.

Jade folded her arms on the table and smiled at her. "It's so nice to see someone normal once in a while." Sam felt a pang in her chest and stuttered over her words.

"Normal?"

"Yeah of all of us, the people we know are nuts. Cat's got one normal friend with you."

"I'm…sorry?" She was taken aback by Jade's comment and wanted to know more, but she wasn't here to do all the talking. She already understood how judgmental the friends were from what Cat had often told her, but she never got to experience it in person. "What qualifies someone as 'normal' anyway?" She would love to psychoanalyze these people and mess with their minds, but she would have to resist the urge.

"Forgive her," Tori rolled her eyes, "We were just talking about my weird ass sister." Tori leaned over the table and lowered her voice to a whisper. "Did you know she's been coming home at like midnight these days?" Sam raised her eyebrows and leaned back in the chair. Her heart sank as Tori leaned back and shook her head. "Or later! I've seen her sneak in the house. She did it last night too."

Beck and Andre both started to chuckle, causing Sam to turn towards the men. She folded her forearms at her waist and tapped her fingertips onto her right arm. "Maybe she's decided to take up her true calling," Andre smacked Beck on the shoulder with his back hand. Tori scrunched her face and her lips formed an oval. "Maybe it's the one thing she's good at, sleeping around."

A sharp pain struck Sam in the side and rage coursed through her veins. Before she could react in defense of Trina, and women in her situation, Tori spoke up. "That's a little too far, Andre." Tori crossed her arms and slanted her eyes. "I can let you guys go out of your way to insult my sister, but don't call her a street-worker. Whatever she does at night, I'm sure she has her reasons-"

"Why not call it like it is? What _else_ would she be doing?"

"What? Come on…"

"See what I mean?" Cat leaned into Sam, whispering her statement. "Tori's let them get away with murder when it comes to their criticizing their relatives. They think they're perfect enough, so they're untouchable. So obviously they see Tori's mother having an affair, her father sometimes drinks and Trina's obviously up to something…they go on the attack because they're above them, and Tori's at the point where she can't make them stop anymore. They'll just laugh in her face."

"I see." Her blood was boiling as it was, but not because of the friends' arrogance. Rather she was angry at them for doing what so many others do. "I've got them figured out already."

"What was that?" Jade asked with a start. Sam glanced at her and shrugged. "You said something about us? What did Cat just whisper?"

"Oh nothing, just that you all think you're above everyone else." She could feel Cat tense beside her, then waited as the rest glared in her direction.

"We are certainly better than a harpy that comes in at midnight after doing god knows what."

"Really? What does God know? You would be so quick to throw a stone at someone, but as He said in the scripture…whoever is sinless, throw the first stone." Sam picked up a roll she got from the nearby food stand and broke it apart. Her voice remained calm and her body relaxed. "I've already got each of you figured out."

"Oh please. What are you, a psychiatrist?"

"She's a counselor," Cat chirped. Sam laughed nervously and lifted a hand in defense.

"Studying to be one, I'm more of an intern right now. I do work my own cases. Or…" Her eyes flickered over to Andre and her lip curled into a smirk. "You could call it like it is."

The friends all leaned back, their palms slid on the table while Tori watched as though a showdown were about to occur. "I've seen a lot of people with a lot of different issues." She uncrossed her arms and pointed a finger at the others. "I've helped them work through, and when I say I've seen each and every one of you…you'd better believe it."

"You think you can crack us?" Andre's eyes lit up and his lips curled into a bright smirk. It was then that Sam saw it, the same exact face of the man that she'd once known. Her breath caught in her throat and the stranger's name hung at the tip of her tongue.

_Mikal Harris._

She took a deep breath, struggling against the pressure in her chest. "Andre, out of curiosity, you don't happen to have a relative named Mikal, do you?" He tensed and dipped his head, his face darkened and his tone reflected animosity.

"Older brother. Haven't seen him in ages, we kind of cast him out of the family. How do you know that name?" Her lips formed a circle and she quickly shook her head.

"N-No reason. You just remind me of someone I met with a similar name and face."

"He um…" Andre's eyes shifted from side to side as the others turned to look at him. "He got caught up using drugs and then was in a lot of filthy stuff." Tori's hand cupped over her mouth and her eyes flickered with resentment.

"And then you have the nerve to call my sister a 'street worker'?!" Andre winced as Tori struck his arm with her fist. "Asshole! Jumping to conclusions when your own brother was into shady activity!"

"Not just him." Andre rubbed his arm and frowned. "My mom and dad were into gang lifestyles. We lived in Seattle when all the gangs started going to war a few years ago up there." Sam pressed her lips together, recalling the vivid memories of Carlos and the gang that held Carly hostage for so long. "They moved me down to live with Grandma before the whole mess really, but yeah…"

"So you're insecure," Sam replied with nonchalance. Andre opened his mouth then bowed his head. "Because you want to be perfect and act like the stain on your own family isn't there, you mock your friend's relatives hoping that it'll cover up the giant growth in your own life."

Cat covered her mouth and the others stared at Andre with wide eyes. "I-"

"Do you deny it?" Sam smirked with confidence and waited as he bowed his head and gently moved it from side to side. "Tori, you should probably realize gossip about your family isn't going to do you a world of good, especially when you have friends that may stop taking you seriously when you finally do tell them enough is enough."

Tori shrugged and looked away. "I just don't think it would come to that."

"It will _always_ come to that. It's human nature to berate and ridicule someone else's faults just to make your own feel light. That doesn't just apply to your friends, but to everyone. I was there once, and I know several people who were there."

"Well you only got Andre pegged," Jade replied cockily. "What about the rest of us? How much do you _think _you know of us? Hm?" Jade pushed her chest forward and chuckled while Cat moved her hands up in front of her eyes.

This was a cruel game to play, since now Sam was itching to put someone in their place. It also gave her a chance to truly flex her skills as a counselor. "Cat's told me just as many things about you guys as I'm sure Tori's told you about her family." Tori's face grew red with embarrassment and she leaned back, putting on a tough face to deflect the feeling. "I'll start with you, Beck…"

"Good luck," Beck chuckled and moved an arm around Jade's shoulders. "I'm probably the least messed up person here." Jade shot him a look and Sam slowly moved her roll to her lips.

"I feel sorry for you." His lips fell into a frown as Sam thought about some of the things Cat told her about his relationship with Jade. There was a time that Cat stumbled upon him in the janitor's closet when she was asked to retrieve something for a teacher, and he was busy looking at a pornographic magazine.

This was the reason she felt so sorry for him. Not only was he unknowingly participating in the abuse of so many women by viewing these things, but if he didn't keep it in check, he may very well become obsessed with it.

"Your type, Beck. You're frustrated and have the ego of a man that's been in a relationship for as long as you have." His face scrunched and he turned his eyes slowly towards Cat. "I can see it in your eyes. Many men, and women, come to the counselor's office with the same dilemma. They want sex in the relationship but the other person doesn't, and they end up turning towards things like pornography, soliciting prostitutes, and so on."

Jade sank away from Beck, shooting him a wide eyed look. He moved his trembling hand through his hair and started to shake his head, but all he could reply with was a stammer. "You don't know, you can't know…"

"Just watch yourself Beck. Every man, and some women have probably looked at a naked woman at least once. It's lust that drives the desire. Just keep it in check before it gets worse."

"I swear." His voice shook and his eyes darted from side to side.

"You're lying!" Jade exclaimed. "I can hear it in your voice! Whenever you lie you can't talk right and your teeth start chattering. Oh my god!" He slouched and bowed his head, grumbling softly. "Have you slept with another woman?"

"Of course not! I wouldn't cheat on you, Jade."

"Oh and trying to kiss Tori that one time was nothing?"

"We weren't together!"

"We weren't broken up long either. Attraction and wanting to kiss someone doesn't just start right away, Beck! Am I not enough for you?"

Robbie curled a finger over his lip and chuckled once. "Now might be a bad time to bring it up, but he did think Tori's sister was hot. That one night when we all went over-we didn't know her dad was there." Tori raised an eyebrow at Robbie, then shot a look at Beck. "He did want to flirt a little."

"You are not helping man!" Beck pointed a finger at Robbie and Jade slowly shook her head. Sam did feel bad for causing this tension, but something had to break this group of the perfect little bubble they cast around themselves.

By the looks on Cat's and Tori's face, they were horrified but pleased at the same time. "I swear I never thought these guys were anything _but_ perfect," Cat laughed. "I don't approve of this, Sam, but keep going!"

"Oh yes do continue," Jade rolled her eyes, "We all know Robbie's got issues."

"A loss," Sam nodded to Robbie and her lips pulled back into the corners of her mouth. "Cat told me how you look after your little sister." Robbie froze and the others raised their eyebrows. "How your dad's in prison now and that your mom and brother died a few years ago." His head bowed and his eyes moved towards a small black case at his feet.

"Yeah…"

Sam reached over, putting her hand over his. His eyes drifted into hers and his lip tucked into a tiny smile. "You're not weird for latching onto something. So many people come into the office with items that either belonged to or remind them of somebody they lost and loved." His eyes started to well up and he quickly swept them with his finger. "It's easy to focus on anything else that masks the pain of that loss and the responsibility you have to contend with, but you can't continue that way."

"It's not that easy."

"I know. Have you considered getting help? Talking to someone about it?"

"Well there is Lane, but he's a bit strange…plus we're kind of done with Hollywood Arts now."

"He may still be able to offer an ear."

"Yeah…"

She looked towards Jade, and the girl instantly threw her hands up. "Don't you dare," Jade replied coldly, "I don't need you psychoanalyzing me. You've already gone and got everyone else upset…"

"I can respect that." It was Jade's case she was most familiar with aside from the workers in the sex industry. Though even people in that lifestyle still suffered from abuse. Jade had all the telltale signs of it.

The over-abundance of makeup, the tendency to project onto others, the lack of trust in others including her own boyfriend, and the overall depressed air that came from her. She wanted to help the girl, but since she wasn't a full counselor she couldn't focus on more than one client, and she already had in mind the person she _was_ going to help.

Besides, her specialization wasn't in abuse cases-though she knew how to counsel someone in such a situation. Still she wasn't to venture, for instance a counselor for troubled teens wouldn't likely counsel a married couple going through family problems.

"Let me save you some time," Tori leaned forward and folded her forearms over the table. Sam met the girl's eyes and frowned at the somberness they held. "I do struggle with family issues. Trina and I both do. What? I'm not going to say, but it should be obvious since you probably realize my mother has an affair. There's obvious marital problems, and both us girls have a clear lack of attention towards us between mom's screwing dad's former partner, and dad's total workaholic personality. Does it bother me? Yes. I don't know how Trina deals with it, but it's probably obvious how I deal with it, no?"

"By telling your friends about every detail of your family's personal life," Cat muttered. Tori's shoulders fell and she exhaled slowly.

"Yeah Cat. Sure." Now this family Sam wanted to meet, and maybe she could further figure out how to truly help Trina-or at least convince the girl to get out of that life before it becomes too late for her. "Anyway…"

Tori smirked and crossed her arms. "I like your roommate, she tells it like it is. You both should come to my church Sunday, they're doing this whole thing because of Dad's recent promotion." The girl rolled her eyes and waved her hand in the air. "I sing in the church's choir. Mom will be there, and maybe if you guys are there it'll save me having to deal with my parents' heightened sense of self-worth."

"I don't know…"

"I don't see why it would hurt," Sam remarked. At first thought, she wasn't comfortable going to a church. They were sometimes the most judgmental of people, especially after word of her life had gotten around in Seattle. She could not go to a church without trying to disguise herself-and that didn't always work. "It could be okay. Maybe better than Seattle…"

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><p>Well, there's that chapter.<p> 


	4. No Simple Task

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 4 (No Simple Task)<p>

"I cannot believe you did that!" Cat laughed once they were in the shelter of their apartment. Sam shrugged nonchalantly and took her seat at the couch. Her gaze fell on the blank television screen. "You not only got them to shut up, but you made them feel like shit."

"Wasn't my goal, Cat. I just wanted them to think before bashing someone else when acting as though they have no qualms." She flashed a subtle smile and closed her eyes. "My power is used for good, not bad."

Cat spun around and put her closed hands to her waist. "You just can't let me have this moment, can you?" Sam put her teeth together and grinned wide. Cat dropped her hands and let her shoulders fall with a heavy sigh. The girl sat down next to her and leaned back against the armrest. "I guess it just feels nice to see someone put them in their place even if that isn't the intention. Last person that did that was Sinjin."

"That's kind of cold for your friends, isn't it?"

Cat's face tensed and she threw her heels up onto the coffee table. "Why should I defend or care about them when they do not care about me?" Her eyebrows rose and she leaned forward, clasping her hands between her knees. It was surprising to hear Cat speak with such bitterness, but then, they'd never spoke much of her friends aside from the occasional story Cat would tell.

Though the fact Cat would tell her things about her friends, even intimate details did show a lack of loyalty towards them. "What have they done to deserve your anger towards them?" Cat threw her hand back and laughed.

"What _haven't_ they done!" The redhead brought her feet back and ran her hands over her knees. She looked away and her chest fell as a loud breath left her lips. "I don't want their pity. I knew from the start that I was 'different'. They befriended me because I didn't have any other friends-I was too weird and too stupid to have friends…so they pitied me." Cat folded her arms and closed her eyes. "For the longest time I didn't even care."

"No?"

"I just went along with the things they said or did, but they rarely asked my opinion on anything. They didn't try to get to know me because I just wasn't interesting enough or whatever." Cat shifted to the right and let her voice fill with anger. "They think they're doing me a favor. Well they can take their so-called friendship and shove it up their asses!"

"I suppose I can understand why you'd feel that way." She wouldn't want anyone to be friends with her out of pity either. "I'd probably drive myself batty if I had a bunch of people around me only out of pity." It was one of the reasons she kept her past so tightly locked up. Not only did she feel it would drive people off, others might just pity her for going through something so terrible, and pity was the last thing she needed.

"Yeah." Cat stood from the couch and made her way to the refrigerator. "You know, I haven't seen Dice in a while. I think he may be avoiding us."

"He's a twelve, thirteen year old boy growing up, Cat. Don't forget he's probably getting other things to do." She leaned back on the armrest and threw her legs up onto the couch, watching as her roommate removed a carton of milk.

"This is also Dice we're talking about. His best friends are a twenty-thirty something pro wrestler and two girls in their late teens and early twenties. I'm betting there aren't that many people his age hanging around."

"True." She moved her left hand behind her head and closed her eyes. "So, Tori's church. You ever been?"

"Can't say I have." Cat poured the milk into a glass and furrowed her brow. "Her father's a deacon, and I think it's a bible church. Mrs. Vega deals with the nursery on Sunday mornings. Last I heard, Trina does not attend." Sam pursed her lips and opened her eyes, studying Cat for the moment.

She was surprised to hear that Trina didn't go, but yet, it made sense to her. "Tori ever mention why that is?"

"From what Tori says, her family is a pack of hypocrites. They go on and on about how perfect they are, judge those that sin like everyone else, and they have a lot of problems in their own lives-mostly marital issues." Cat returned the milk and drank from the glass. She wiped her lip with her finger and shrugged. "Tori may have mentioned that Trina simply refuses to go to church with them so she goes just to appease them and be the good daughter."

"Sounds like a destructive environment for both girls."

"Yeah, it would be. I'm not sure how Tori manages to keep her sanity-I really think she was telling the truth with how she deals with it all. She tells everybody her family's most intimate personal problems like they're just stories waiting to be told, they have no privacy. Then she uses Hollywood Arts as if it were some sort of drug."

"What do you mean? It's just a school, right? She doesn't go anymore."

"She still performs on stage there for everyone. Tori lives for the applause and cheers of everyone watching her." This was another note to jot down, though it didn't pertain to Trina, it could certainly provide clues for further analysis.

Both girls were involved in some sort of performance outlet-albeit different kinds. For Tori it was singing and dancing, for Trina it was the sex industry. As with most cases, these troubles stemmed almost directly from family issues.

"Then I look forward to this church." She wanted to know more about this family, to see them personally and gauge just how deeply rooted this mess was. On one part she knew counselors weren't supposed to get involved with the family of a client unless permission had been given by the client, but on her side she wasn't physically acting with her client. Trina had not started any sort of counseling, and Tori invited her and Cat along to the church. "At least this is ethical."

"What does that mean?"

"Nothing." Cat raised an eyebrow at her and Sam pushed herself up with a heavy sigh. She didn't want to be secretive where she didn't have to be. "Well actually, I do kind of want to observe the Vega family."

"Oh god." Cat's face turned sour and she set the glass gently on the counter. "You're turning them into one of your subjects, aren't you?"

"It isn't like that, exactly."

"Well you're always working on your counselor notes." Cat made her way back to the couch and motioned to the laptop on the recliner cushion. It was Sam's, she had it password protected for sake of confidentiality, but Cat was aware it held all her important notes. "I imagine that implies you're also going to need a client. I should probably warn you, Tori and her family are some pretty crazy people."

"I've met crazy, Cat. Unless they're gang members hyped up on PCP, I doubt that they're anything I can't deal with." She curled a smirk on her lips and watched Cat's face fall. The girl's lips parted and her hands moved to her waist, but she remained speechless.

"Do I even _want_ to ask?"

"You probably don't." She shook her head and crossed her arms. She was referring to Carlos, the leader of the gang involved in the prostitution ring that claimed Carly before she had a chance to get out of the sex industry.

When they finally found her, she'd been hooked up to an IV pumping drugs into her body while she lay bedridden. Sam's father had the police clear out the gang involved in this ring, thereby saving as many of the prostitutes as they could-with Carly being the last one rescued. In desperation, Carlos tried to fight them off by taking PCP-the "invincible" drug.

During the fight, a rival gang leader along with the help of Douglas, the former gang leader that Carly had been dating, brought him down by continually pumping PCP into his body until he overdosed.

"It was a mess, Cat. That's all I'm going to say on that note." She rolled her head to the right and glanced at the laptop. "Although that reminds me, I should give Carly a call and see how she and Doug are doing."

"When was the last time you talked to her?"

"About a week ago. She was thinking of moving back to Seattle, but I don't think she's going to for a while. Carly and Douglas really don't want to go back." She pressed her lips together and shook her head. "Memories of a bad time."

"Yeah, I don't know if you and Carly were involved in the whole thing a couple years ago-the fight in Seattle was all over the news." Cat sat down on the couch and leaned back. "Your father's the police chief there, right? Or he was, anyway."

"Yep."

"Seattle's police and a few gangs rallied against this whole prostitution ring, turning the town into a warzone, right? If he was the police chief, then I wonder if you and Carly were affected in any way."

"Anything's possible."

No names were given, and Carly especially didn't want her face or name all over the airwaves. Sam maintained her privacy as well.

Sam took her laptop and powered it on. "Still, I can't believe you want to observe the Vega family." She chuckled at her roommate and kept her focus on the computer. "If you want a client, take your pick of me or any of my other friends. I don't mind, I'll be a willing client! The Vega's are…they're too hard!"

"What makes you think that?"

"Because what one Vega goes through, all of them deal with. I'm sure. I don't mean like they all have the same problem, but that family's got to be one of the most tightly wound group in LA. Not to mention the obvious, Mr. Vega is now the sitting police chief-so someone from his family undergoing counseling is probably not going to sit well with him."

"My dad was a police chief-I know how to handle those types."

"I'm saying Mr. Vega likes a spotless, picture perfect, clean image." As did her father, there was no news here. Men and women in places of power in the city liked upholding a clean reputation, especially if their career choice was one of those that required being an upstanding citizen of the law. "Why do you think no one in his family has ever gone through counseling? He's not going to let it happen because it _would _get around-and I don't mean by way of his blabbermouth daughter. All it takes is someone seeing one of his relatives entering a counselor's office, and news will spread."

"I think you forget I don't operate in an office setting quite yet. I'm also not fully established, so people don't know I'm a counselor."

"All I'm saying is…if you really want to make someone in _that_ family part of your research, a client, or whatever-just be careful. They're not easy people to crack."

"I didn't take this job because it would be 'easy', Cat." With everything she would have to deal with, putting aside her own personal bias for the sake of her clients, there was no way in hell counseling was an easy task. "Besides, I _know_ how Mr. Vega would react."

"He's not the same type of man your father was."

"That, my dear friend, remains to be seen." Though her dad wasn't a bad person, he truly cared about his family once he got past the notion of having a spotless reputation. Of course, having a daughter involved in the sex industry may have had a hand in humbling him a bit.

Regardless of whether or not she got involved in this family's business, his unshakable reputation would fall eventually because Trina _was_ involved in the sex industry. For Sam, she was already determined to help Trina, and nothing was going to stop her.

Yet the entire Vega clan seemed like they needed saving. If anything, it was from their own pride and self-destructive tendencies. As much as she appreciated Cat's offer to be her client, or extending that to her other friends, none of them were a viable option.

Cat was correct in the sense that it wasn't going to be simple, Sam wasn't going to delude herself into thinking it would be. It was a subject she'd have to approach with extreme caution. As a freshly appointed Chief, Mr. Vega wouldn't take kindly to any counselor-even a non-established one getting involved in his family's affairs.

He'd be the one Vega that couldn't know right now, if ever, that she was a counselor or else he'd shut her out before she got a chance to do any good whatsoever.

* * *

><p>So a monumental task obviously ahead. As much as she wants to help Trina (And she's not the only one that knows or wants to get her help either) the Vega family is so intricately woven that to help one from the muck, she may end up having to help counsel all of them. Well it does happen that some counselors have to set up a meeting with relatives.<p> 


	5. Reaching for Help

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: Approach this chapter with care. I have no intention of going into theology. Church and religion will appear here and there as a tool but it isn't a major thing here. I am not going to push beliefs or anything. My stance on religion is that of a neutral part-hence the church in this is a non-denominational bible church. That's my disclaimer

A/N: On an side note, approach every chapter with care because of the issues that will be tossed about in this story.

* * *

><p>Chapter 5 (Reaching for Help)<p>

Church. It was the one place Sam hadn't approached in so long, nor had she made any attempt for lack of desire. Walking in with her was Cat, who made this venture a great deal easier on the level of stress it was causing. "Nothing ventured, nothing gained," Sam muttered with a deep breath.

"You act like it's the worst place on earth," Cat responded flatly. She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "It is only church. What irritates me are the people who assume churchgoers have to be above human standards-there's bad on both sides but there's also good."

"I know that." She had nightmares about places like these, fearful of the judging eyes burning into her body and leaving scars as deep as those that remained from her past days in the sex industry. "I don't blame the religion for the people in it. I blame the people in it for the human nature that makes them behave in judgmental and hypocritical ways."

"I can understand that. I haven't been to a church in a while either."

It took her a while, but she did believe in a higher power. There were many times when she questioned whether or not God existed, and if he did, why would he let certain things happen to people. It was a subject she hadn't approached nor cared to approach.

"The last thing I need is a bunch of holier-than-thou people imposing their judgment on me. I'm here for one purpose and one purpose only, the Vega family."

"Got it." Cat rolled her eyes and motioned past her. Sam followed her gesture and smiled at Tori in the distance. The Vega was standing beside her parents, picking idly at something on her shirt. David and Holly were happily chatting with another couple.

Tori made eye contact with Sam and breathed out a relieved sigh before telling her parents she was going off to talk to someone. Holly asked her not to interrupt, so she merely shrugged and moved over to Sam and Cat. "Glad you guys could make it." Tori's hands moved to her waist and her head turned over her shoulder. "I'm going to go insane if I hear one more person ask Dad how he feels having been appointed to police chief." Her eyes drifted to the ceiling and her shoulders fell. "Not to mention how _great_ it is that God's fulfilling His purpose through my Dad."

The girl's tone took a mocking turn filled with spite and resentment. It caught Sam off guard, but she recovered as soon as she could. "I suppose it's a big deal having a police chief in your church."

"Oh please. My father's so full of himself and mom's still hanging on to him for money." Tori scratched her forehead and exhaled sharply. "I'm starting to sound like Trina now. Just perfect."

"I take Trina's not too thrilled about you dad's promotion either?"

"Oh neither of us are unhappy about it, don't get me wrong." Tori crossed her arms and stared at her father. "We're happy for him because he's worked so hard to get to where he's at, we're just sick of hearing about it!"

"I know the feeling." Sam laughed at the memory of her own father's appointment to the status of Chief. It was all over town, and the people at her school would not stop showering her with both compliments and fear of her status for nearly the entire year. "My dad's a chief, when he made the grade, people didn't let up for an entire year."

"You know something?" Tori's voice fell flat and she glanced back with half-lidded eyes and a subtle frown. "That's not in any way uplifting. You know how hard it is being the daughter of a police chief?"

"My dad's one."

"Exactly. So you get it."

"It's a headache, I know."

"We're under such strict watch." Tori shook her head and closed her eyes. "We can't do anything that would paint a bad image-though mom and dad are still just as neglectful. I swear Trina and I could get away with murder and not be seen until after the fact. Mom and Dad don't bother much with what we do as they do with their image-though how mom gets away with her affair, I'll never know."

"So what did you invite us here for?" Sam crossed her arms and retained a polite smile. The other day when she met Tori, she sensed a great deal of hesitancy when she spoke to her friends. When they brought Trina up, the swiftness of response from Tori was astonishing, she grew defensive in an instant. "I don't think you've invited us simply to make your time at church easier on yourself, especially if you're only sitting in the choir booth."

Tori leaned back and folded her arms. Her eyebrows rose and her eyes darted towards her parents. "You're right. You seem like you're just starting out as a counselor, but you're already good at reading people."

"You have to know how to do that. Part of the job."

"Yeah, I liked how you managed to single out everyone. Everything we talk about would be confidential, right?"

Sam heard a murmur beside her and turned to see Cat slowly shaking her head. "At this point I guess I should go elsewhere," the redhead asked. Sam opened her mouth to speak, but Tori beat her to it and apologized to Cat before asking to speak with Sam. "Great. I'll see you guys in the service. I'll find something to busy myself with."

Once the girl walked off, Tori motioned for Sam to follow. They walked into an empty room and Tori shut the door behind her. She sat down at a table and looked up to the girl. "Okay," Tori took a seat in front of her and folded her hands on the surface. "So the reason I asked you here was so I could talk to you-being a counselor, I didn't want to say anything in front of my friends." Tori shut her eyes and breathed in slowly. "I lied."

"About?"

"Trina." Sam leaned back in the chair. The air grew tense as Tori's posture changed into a rigid form. The girl's brow furrowed and her eyes focused on her thumb, moving idly over the back of her hand. "I talk a lot of crap about her, I know, but I can't stand someone calling her a prostitute the way Andre did." Sam closed her lips together and nodded once as Tori turned her eyes up to hers. "The thing is, I know that's what she does. I know why she does it…I also know it's the reason she doesn't come to church on Sunday. I paint my family in bad light sometimes, sure, but I don't embellish. I don't make them seem half as full of shit as they are-you'll forgive me for cursing in church."

"I understand." Sam leaned forward, studying Tori's eyes closely.

"I just…Trina doesn't know that I know." Tori's body trembled once and her eyes darted away quickly. "I was curious why she always left the house at night and wouldn't come home until midnight or later. Once I voiced my curiosity to my friends-the _stupidest_ ass mistake I ever made!" Tori clenched her hands and shook her head.

"It's okay. You didn't know." Sam understood curiosity, and she understood it wasn't Tori's fault for being curious. Granted she wouldn't like for someone else to say anything about her activities back when she was doing the same thing, so Trina likely wouldn't either. "It was an honest mistake."

"Yeah well. I followed her one night." Tori leaned back and moved her hand over her mouth. Her eyes started to mist and she quickly shook her head. "The things I saw her do-the things I saw those men do to her…"

"You watched?"

"I didn't _watch_, I looked in the fucking window. I couldn't look away! S-She was acting like she enjoyed it." The story broke Sam's heart. She would never want Melanie to have to see the things that she'd done, and it had been her father that discovered her life when investigating some website. "I haven't told my friends that-and how could I? No, why would I?"

"Good." Sam moved her hand to her chest and breathed in slowly. "That's not something they need to know, and I don't believe your sister would appreciate it either. Why are you telling me?"

"I want help. I want her to get help, but I know if I say anything she's just going to deny it or get pissed that I would even involve myself in her life." Tori pulled her hands away from the table and narrowed her eyes. "I know I have the same means of escape, but not prostitution-I could never…never do that. I sing on stage, I perform, I love the attention it gives me-the applause it brings. So much I can't get at home! But prostitution?"

"Let me ask you." A wrinkle formed between her brows and she began to miss the fact that she hadn't brought her journal with her. Sometimes it was best not to write anything down, though. Better for the client. "How different is the attention you receive from people watching you sing and dance onstage as opposed to the attention that perhaps a stripper or prostitute would receive? A stripper still works in the sex industry, but still performs on a stage in front of an active audience."

"True. I guess they're still receiving attention where they're unable to elsewhere."

"Right. Only it isn't always healthy, just like the attention that you receive may not always be healthy." Tori jerked back and raised her eyebrows.

"I don't understand."

"It's easy." Sam exhaled and watched as an attentive expression fell over Tori's face. The thrill of an audience meant you would want to do more to please them, the same performance repeated would come to bore them. Therefore a performance calls for something new, something exciting. "In the end it's about self-control, Tori. How far are you willing to push yourself and how thin will the gap between that lust for attention and your morals grow? Look at Miley Cyrus, she was once reserved was she not?"

"Probably more than she is now. Now she's become almost like a-" Tori stopped herself and Sam's lips turned up into a gentle smirk. She nodded once and crossed her arms.

"Go ahead and say it. What does she appear like now?"

"A stripper. Then the moves she was doing in that video." Tori clenched her eyes shut and shook her head. "Those music producers are almost like glorified pimps letting her sell her body to the world." Tori's eyes shot open and she spoke up quickly. "But I would never-"

"I'm not saying that you'd ever go so far, but think about what drives people like that. What is at the center, the core? Besides money, what do they love? Not just her either, others like Lady Gaga, Rhianna, Beyoncé?"

"Attention and love from the audience."

"Right, and so they must come up with new material. What's a phrase you hear common throughout media today? 'Sex sells'. So you have a few like Miley Cyrus that decide to all but have sex on stage which increases viewership. The lust for that attention becomes so great that you're willing to do just about anything to get more. I guarantee you it's not solely the fault of the producers either, because every singer out there-every actor and actress has the willpower to say no and turn down the request to cross that line."

"I…once was approached by a producer that wanted me to dress up in scanty outfits and change everything about me."

"What happened?"

"I turned down the opportunity. I walked away. It was tempting as hell but…I just couldn't do that."

"My point. Though there are some people who can't make that distinction, some people who get so hooked on attention they let themselves get so far that there's no foreseeable way out."

"Yeah…but back to my sister. Do-Do you think you can help her?"

"Someone has to want to be helped, Tori." Tori frowned and Sam bowed her head. "I can't make Trina want to be helped, she has to want it, but I'm glad you're at least wanting to get her that. Then in order to make a change that person has to try."

"But…I don't want something bad to happen to her. Can't you at least talk to her?"

"I can try, but it could be like trying to drill into a block of concrete with a pencil." Tori scrunched her face. She'd been where she didn't want to hear anything about her lifestyle choice, and the only thing that got her to open up to needing help was when her family kicked her out. Then without Jonah and Valerie taking her in-albeit reluctantly on Jonah's part, and their putting strict blocks on everything from the computer to her personal life, she would have fell right back into it. "Someone won't be willing to hear something until they know they need it."

"And just what would make that happen? What would make someone like my sister open up?"

"Honest truth?" She hated to say it, especially to a concerned relative that Tori was. She knew the girl wasn't going to open herself to help right away, she hoped it wouldn't be too late and that she could find a way to get through to Trina-or at least help Tori gain the tools to do the job herself. "Sometimes it takes a sledgehammer to break open a block of concrete. Not to mention, someone can't receive help without help from others…"

"I see." There was a knock at the door and Tori looked over her shoulder. Someone had seen them go in. The person spoke from behind the door, letting them know the service was about to begin. "That's the choir director. I should go." Tori pat the table with her hands and sighed. "My friends-Cat included-are having a poker game Monday afternoon. Please come? Trina will be there."

"She's met me, she might be a little uneasy seeing me."

"So what? You don't have to say you know me, just that you're Cat's roommate and I extended an invite to you. Trina leaves to her…'job'…at seven. Please come, you don't have to try and counsel her, just be there."

She could definitely try and keep Trina from leaving, but it wouldn't always work. Knowing her own experience in the sex industry, unless there was a john controlling the situation or they worked at a strip club, the amount of work a prostitute did could rely on whether the person felt like working that night. If she could at least approach Trina offering an olive branch in the form of friendship first, then maybe she could get the girl's interest level to a point where she did not leave that night.

"Okay." Sam sm`iled at Tori and stood up from the table. "I'll at least try. Cat's not too happy with you guys right now, though." Tori frowned and looked away with a sigh.

"I was afraid of that, but I understand. She's really been upset with us a lot lately, but with how my friends act-yeah…you think she'll turn down the offer of poker?"

"Well if she does I'll try to talk her back into it. If I go over to your house, she absolutely must be there."

"Thank you, Sam. Honestly."

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><p>Tori's reaching out is definitely good, if there is someone trying to help then that's more support for a person when they start to get the help they need. In this, Sam is what the grad students at my college's Psych students are, not a fully established counselor yet but still a counselor in full right. She may refer people to someone that can help out-other people instead of just the Vega clan will likely seek her out in that respect. Your thoughts on this chapter.<p> 


	6. A Little Attention Goes Far

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 6 (A Little Attention Goes Far)<p>

The next afternoon Sam and Cat were getting ready to head over to the Vega house. Cat didn't want to go, but she decided it was better to at least appear cordial, so there wasn't much need to try and convince Cat to go. Before they left, Sam could hear Cat talking to somebody. She looked around the corner and smiled when she saw Dice in the kitchen.

Something was different about him though, he was speaking in a quiet voice and had his hands in his pocket. His head was bowed and his face held a nervous sweat. "Thanks for the help," Dice looked up to Cat and shrugged. "I didn't want to bother you but I couldn't think of anyone else to ask."

"Well you know you can come over if you need money, just not much." Cat threw an empty can of soup into the trash bin. "I know you don't usually ask for money and it's not much, so I'm happy to help out if you need to."

"Yeah, again thanks. My aunt really needs that cream." Dice scratched the back of his head and looked around nervously. "So uh, you said Sam was taking a nap before you guys left?"

"Yes, but she's probably awake by now. Did you want her for something?"

"No." His answer came out with a rushed tone that startled Sam when she heard him. She scrunched her nose and furrowed her brow as a sharp pain hit her in the chest. Cat's lips formed an oval and Dice removed his hands, waving them in the air. "I really don't want to bother her, that's all. I know you say she's busy and everything."

Sam's eyes slanted and she quickly stepped around the corner, moving casually. "Not too busy for our favorite little munchkin." Dice spun around and his eyes grew large.

"I-I am not a dwarf! I'm an average size for my age."

"Aw isn't that cute?" She pinched his cheek and smirked dangerously as he recoiled. "Shorty's getting offended. Should I be offended that you're avoiding me?"

"What? No! I wouldn't-I'm not avoiding you! You guys are my only friends." He paused and snapped his fingers. "Scratch that-my only friends with a brain, Goomer's been hit in the head too many times." Sam crossed her arms and watched as Dice fidgeted and looked towards the door.

"You are avoiding me, and I want to know why, Dice. The only reason you came over was to ask for money, and you look so pale that you could faint at any minute."

"Pale?" He felt his forehead and cheeks, then groaned. "Well I definitely have been feeling sick lately. I'm coming down with something and I don't want you guys to catch it." He made his way to the door and looked back over his shoulder. "Again, thanks for the help!"

"No problem," Cat chimed. Sam put her elbow on the counter and waved as Dice ran out the door. "What was that about, Sam? I don't think he's avoiding us." She could tell he was gravely upset about something, and while she feared it, she had a bad feeling in her gut that he might have found something that he should never have seen. "He's just sick, that's what he said earlier."

"Yeah well, I'm not sure that sickness is a contagious one…" She shook her head and grabbed her jacket from the couch. "But whatever, let's get to your friend's place."

"Why does Tori want you there?"

"I honestly can't say."

"Can't, or won't?"

"Confidential."

"Yeah." Cat nodded once and tugged her lips back into a line. "That's what I thought. Decided to make clients out of the Vega's after all."

"Tori asked, that much is evident."

"Help one you'll have to help them all." Sam raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. Cat walked around the counter and grabbed her purse off the table. "Like I said, that family's got problems up to your chin. You sift through the muck of one Vega, you need to help them all-and I'm not sure they're worth it. If they can even be helped." Sam rolled her head to the right and exhaled as a deep sorrow lifted up.

"Nobody is beyond help, Cat."

"I know, I know, but with them…you probably ought to leave them to a professional."

"I am a professional."

"I mean a seasoned one…"

"I won't give up on them, Cat." Cat smiled sadly and closed her eyes, shrugging gently. It was clear the girl's anger with the Vega clan ran deep, but Sam could not allow the bitterness of one person to stop her. "I'm a counselor, I have to help." She couldn't afford bias. "If I don't try to help where they need me, then what does that say about me as a counselor?"

"You're right, it's just-" Cat took a deep breath and started for the door. "I hope you know what you're getting yourself into."

At the Vega house Trina met them with a smile. Her friends had already arrived, and none looked too pleased to see her there. While Cat moved to the table with the others, Sam sat in the recliner.

She made careful observations of the friends, studying their body language for sake of practice. They had been leaning back in a relaxed state, but now they were hunched forward and tense. Every so often someone would glance at her, and when they saw her staring, they'd look away.

"You can all relax," Sam stated abruptly, "I'm not here to grill you or make you feel uncomfortable. Tori and Cat asked me over."

"So why don't you join the poker game?" Beck asked. Jade shot him a glare and he sank in his seat. "Someone has to offer, Jade."

"It's alright." Sam hung her arm over the armrest and looked towards the stairs. "I'm not a big fan of poker." She could hear voices coming from a room nearby, calling her attention to a door. In the corner of her eyes, Tori let her shoulders fall and exhaled sharply.

The voices belonged clearly to a couple of adults, both were yelling profanities. There were noises that implied items being thrown against the wall. Tori spoke loudly to keep her friends interested, but the way they were sitting-now comfortably-implied they were used to this.

After several seconds, Holly stormed out of the room. She was wearing a dark purple shirt and jeans, her red purse hung from her left shoulder. Her hair was pulled back into a bun and she had on copious amounts of makeup as though she were going out on a date.

"Hey mom," Tori stated. Holly let out a grunt and raced out the front door. Tori met Sam's eyes and bounced her head to the door. Sam nodded back at her and looked at the room Holly left from.

The inside appeared to be a study of some sort. There was a desk littered with stacks of paper and small laptop. Above this desk was a framed photo of a happy couple and two young children. A painful sensation stabbed at her as she studied the photo. "Such a shame," she whispered.

David stepped in the doorway and scowled at the group for a second before slamming the door shut. Sam shook her head and looked back to the steps, seeing Trina standing at the top step. She had a long ponytail and was wearing a short tank top and a matching skirt. "Well glad that's over with!" Trina exclaimed. The friends groaned at her and Tori twisted to face her.

"You're not going out too are you?"

"In a little bit." Trina started down the steps and shot a glance at Sam, freezing as recognition glimmered in her eyes. "Hey. It's you! What are you doing here?"

"I'm Cat's roommate." Sam crossed her legs and smiled politely at the girl. "She invited me to tag along." Trina made her way over and sat on the side of the couch closest to the recliner.

"Oh. Well regardless, it's…interesting to see you again." Trina flipped her hair over her shoulder and looked towards the door to her father's office. "I know you're a counselor type, but don't try to figure my family out. Mom and Dad have been like that for years now."

"Must be rough."

Trina chuckled sorely and looked back. "You want rough? A couple years ago they sent both me, and Tori, away to separate camps. Tori goes to a bible camp and I was sent to some karate camp. We were annoyed because they were fighting so much, Mom started cheating on Dad and he started focusing on his job so much."

"So they sent you two away because you complained?"

"Yep. How fucked up is that?" Trina leaned back in the couch and shrugged. It was harsh indeed, but surely there could be worse places to be sent to. Although the hard part of it was their own parents sent them away just because they wanted a little more attention. "I probably got more out of my camp than Tori, probably."

This could be a key conversation to start a prospective friendship on, or at least keep Trina from heading out. With that in the back of her mind, Sam decided to push forward. Tori had already let her know she'd try to do something to keep Trina from leaving, but this was a start.

"Tell me more about your experience at camp." Trina raised an eyebrow and shrugged.

"You're really interested in that part of my life?"

"Sure, I mean it sounds like you had a good time there if you say you got more out of your experience than Tori did hers." Trina laughed and leaned forward.

"Well okay. I've never had anyone take an interest in that-or me in general." Sam smiled at this and acknowledged with a nod. This was familiar to her since that reasoning was a big reason she'd dealt into the lifestyle that she'd been in. If someone had shown they really gave a damn about her life, if her family had taken an interest in her sooner and stopped focusing on Melanie so much, then maybe she wouldn't have fallen into that life. For Trina it appeared to be the same way, though neither parents took an interest in either girl from what it appeared.

"Well what are you waiting for? I'd like to know how karate camp was. I've always pictured it to be boring?"

"Boring?" Trina scoffed and ripped out a loud laugh, startling the others. A smirk flashed on Trina's face and she lifted her shoulders. "Well I learned a little about martial arts there, I've never had so much fun. Not to mention this cute boy that was there."

"Oh? Do tell."

"There isn't much to tell. I don't imagine he'd want a thing to do with me _now_, but back then?" Trina leaned to the right and fanned herself with her hand. "Hot as hell. I think I was all he was into at the camp."

"You were into him?"

Trina put her hands to the couch and pushed herself back into the couch. "Was I ever!" The girl took a long pause, her eyebrows curled inwards and her mouth fell along with her shoulders. She bowed her head and sighed before glancing to the clock on the television. "I should probably go, though…it's getting late." Sam's heart stopped and she saw Tori look over with wide eyes.

Thinking fast, Sam reached forward, hovering her hand carefully over Trina's wrist. "No please." Trina looked to her hand, then looked into Sam's eyes with a perplexed look. "You haven't told me much, I'm still very interested in this camp."

"Yeah but, I don't like talking about the guy."

"So don't, just tell me about the camp. Do you really have to go?"

"I…" Trina's brow furrowed and her hands fell beside her legs. "I guess not. I have a little time to talk. I don't have anywhere to be if you're really interested."

"Trina." Sam beamed with pride and curved her lips into a full smile. She could see Tori watching closely from the table, appearing ready to cry out in joy. As long as she kept this girl talking, she would not be leaving this house. Besides, why go and get attention from people prowling the streets for sex when she had attention right here? "You've got my full, undivided attention."

* * *

><p>It's definitely a start. Friendship is a good way to get a trust going so they'll be more apt to listen and come in times of difficulty. In this instance, coupled with Sam's own past experience, Trina may eventually come to her for counsel. We'll have to see, but this is a good starting point. Also a good chance to see what the situation is with the Vega clan.<p> 


	7. Cat's Lament

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 7 (Cat's Lament)<p>

"I suppose I shouldn't ask if you did anything Tori wanted you to do." Cat removed the purse from her shoulder and looked towards Sam. "You spent the entire night talking to Trina." True, Tori's friends likely wondered why she was there if all she was doing was talking to the elder sister, but for the night her mission was a success and Trina wound up having supper at the house before heading upstairs to bed.

"Yeah, you don't need to worry about it, Cat."

Cat grabbed the television remote and fell back onto the couch. "You and Trina friends now?"

"Yeah." Trina had given Sam her phone number so they could chat. It was a start, and of course she hoped to utilize it to help prevent Trina from going out as often. She couldn't stop the girl from everything, but at the very least she could minimize the opportunity Trina had. Which, according to both Tori and Trina, it was every second, fourth and sixth day of the week. Trina also mentioned the typical time frame she went out those nights. "Hopefully we can become friends."

"Friends, or counselor?"

"Why not both?" When she becomes a full blown counselor, she wouldn't be able to be friends with her clients outside of work. Right now, however, that was not the case. "I'm still just studying right now."

"Uh huh. Well, if you insist on getting involved with the Vega's and their problems, I won't argue. Trina needs a friend, from what I understand. I don't think she has any." Cat kicked her heels up on the coffee table and turned on the television. Her lips spread into a scowl and she huffed once. "Who can blame her? The rumors spread by Tori's friends, and the way they treated her in the past turns people away because it makes them think something's wrong with Trina. They do not realize how much power of influence they have."

"So you're saying they unintentionally influence people to push someone away?"

"Oh yeah. Hello, Sinjin called us the popular crowd." Cat turned her head and cocked a half smile. "Remember your days in high school? What do people want to do when they see someone associating with the popular crowd?"

"They want to talk to that person." And those turned away from the popular crowd can oftentimes be ostracized-especially if said crowd makes it so. "Have the others ever built up or torn down anyone to others?"

"Oh yes. With Sinjin they would tell people he was gross and no one would talk to the guy. With Trina it was similar, they'd tear her apart to people and so no one wanted anything to do with the girl. Why? Because 'Jade, Beck, Andre, or Tori said you were such and such'." Cat set the remote on her leg and snapped her fingers. "Want to know why people started associating with me or Robbie? We were part of the 'in' crowd. People didn't give a shit how obscene we were."

"I see." Therein lied the potential for the opportunities Trina had. Without someone there to give her something to do, she was reliant on boredom. For Sam, if Carly hadn't gotten involved in that lifestyle she could have provided more of a means to keep Sam out of the life. She got into it since Carly got involved first. "So your friends become enablers without realizing it…"

"What?"

"Nothing."

"You know what's weird?" Sam took a seat and shook her head at Cat. "For as much grief as Tori talks about her family-including her sister-she never spends a single Saturday with us. Why? She spends Saturday with Trina."

"I was under the impression she didn't care for her sister."

"So are we, but there's this tradition Tori says she and Trina started many years ago. They never stopped even as the family unit seemed to crumple up. Every Saturday is 'sister day', they pick an activity-whether it's shopping, movies, going out to eat-and they spend the entire day together."

"Sounds pleasant, actually. Melanie and I would do stuff like that, but we never had any kind of day planned out. Did you ever do stuff like that with your brothers?"

"Just my older brotherbefore he went overseas" Cat shifted her gaze over. "Your fiancé is overseas, right?"

"Yep. Derek won't be back for a while."

"I see. You don't talk much about him." There wasn't much to say on the issue that how they met and fell in love would involve telling Cat about the past she had. She didn't want to lie and make up a story.

"Derek was there for me during a time when most men would turn away." Cat's lips turned to a circle, then a gradual smile. This was the closest to the truth that Sam could get. Derek had been a friend of Jonah's and Valerie, she met him after the couple let her move in with them. He was attracted to her not because of her body, and he stayed with her even after learning that she'd been into pornography. "Carly's husband was the same way. Though, a bit different."

"I see." Douglas had been the one to get them involved in the life to begin with. Carly started dating him, and since he was a gang member he started out doing what his father and Carlos wanted by getting a couple girls 'initiated' into the sex industry so they could be taken into the gang's prostitution ring. He fell in love with Carly after a while and tried to get the girls out of that life before the rest of the gang could sink their claws into them.

"The group heard Trina's excitement at the start of the conversation over some guy…that was before you guys got quiet. What was that about?"

"She wouldn't go into detail." Sam was curious about the man as well. What would the chances be of the man being like Derek was to Sam? Then again, a summer fling at the camp-the chances of ever meeting that guy again were slim to none. "She stopped talking about him as quickly as she brought him up."

"You think maybe she's afraid to be with someone?" Sam raised an eyebrow and stared at Cat. There was a good reason Trina wouldn't want to be with someone on a more intimate and emotional level, but likely not in the way Cat was thinking. "Every guy that she's ever been interested in has either turned her down or she's dumped because one of the others told her no guy was legitimately interested in 'someone like her'."

"Harsh."

"I know. Even I'm guilty of it…" Her heart fell and she crossed her arms across her chest. Cat rubbed her neck and sighed heavily. "There was this guy…he was going to take Trina out for dinner, then out of the blue he came to us-Robbie and myself-and had us dump her in song."

She scratched her ear and turned away. "Come again?" It was hard to believe Cat would be enticed into doing something like that to somebody, but if it was with Robbie, there was a chance that Robbie persuaded her to go through with it. Though of all ways to dump someone for somebody else, doing it in song was almost like saying 'fuck you' to somebody. "We'll skip the fact that the guy in the situation is a fucking asshole, but you did the dumping in _song?"_

"We were doing this stupid singing telegram thing. I know it was wrong, and yeah the dude was a prick for it. Trina ended up smashing Robbie's guitar though." Cat chuckled and shook her head. "I…never got a chance to apologize to Trina for that. I even talked to Robbie about it, he says if anyone should apologize it's the guy that dumped her."

"Cat. Dear. You and Robbie did the dumping-in a very thoughtless way." She started to pull out her phone, thinking an apology from Cat would be a benefit to Trina's psyche. She stopped when she figured maybe it was so long ago that Trina wouldn't want it brought up. "Really if an apology is warranted, it's from you two."

"I know. I don't know if it would make things better, but you know…it really wasn't fair to her."

"I am truly glad you realize that. You could very well have pressed the whole 'no guy will ever like you' issue that you say your friends do." Cat turned her eyes towards her feet and swayed her shoes from side to side.

"I know. I had a scary thought the other day."

"What?"

"What if Andre and the others were right about their assumptions in her?" Sam hesitated as Cat looked into her eyes with a great deal of torment. "What if Trina _did _turn to prostitution to get away from her family problems? I don't want to think that would happen, but what if? It's bad enough people have often told her no guy would ever like her-which couldn't be further from the truth-but if she turned to prostitution then…"

Sam breathed in slowly and looked towards the television. "Yeah Cat. What if?" She had an answer, and it wasn't an easy one. The sex industry can easily desensitize one to emotions such as love and trust, especially with the number of men that are literally giving someone attention solely for sex. It's hard then to picture anyone giving someone attention out of love-it becomes difficult to understand what love is.

Going in already with the impression that no one would truly care about you on an emotional level would only fuel this process like oil to a burning flame. For Sam, it took so much energy and time from Derek to show her that he was genuine in his love for her.

She heard a squeaking sound and glanced over to see Cat's eyes growing misty. "Sam…I know we're speaking hypothetically, right? So…you're a counselor, you're into psychology-what would happen if that was the case?"

"Then it would be very hard for her to see and trust a man that genuinely cares for her. Difficult to know what love is anymore and hard for one that loves her to prove it. Her image of what a man wants in her could be skewed." Cat held her breath and pressed her lips together. Sam smiled sadly and rubbed her shoulder. "Don't blame yourself for anything, Cat."

"I wish I told that asshole to go fuck himself. Robbie too because he was the one that wanted to go through with it even after acknowledging it was a dick move!" Cat turned her eyes to the purse between the two of them. She mumbled something then reached for it. "Fuck it."

"What are you doing?"

"Calling Trina!" Sam started to stop her, but seeing the determination on the girl's face, she pulled back. The girl removed her cell phone and dialed a number, striking the speaker phone once it began to ring.

After four rings, Trina answered in a groggy tone. "Hello? Who's calling me?"

"Trina hi, it's me, Cat…"

"Cat? I'm sleeping. Or was. What do you want?"

"I was doing some thinking." Cat sighed heavily and closed her eyes. "Evaluating things in my mind. Do you-do you remember that time Robbie and I sang to you?"

"Um…"

"That guy, Seth."

"Oh yeah, the guy didn't have the audacity to dump me in person. I remember. Should've bashed Robbie with the guitar instead of the tree outside." Sam stifled a laugh and Cat shook her head. "Why?"

"I just…I was thinking about all the stuff my friends say and do-and I know how it affects other people around us. I wanted to apologize. Especially for the part I played in that whole thing with Seth."

"Cat, you really don't-"

"I need to. I'm sorry. I don't want you to think that no man will ever want you."

Trina chuckled softly. "Men want me. Some women too, but I'm not into that." Cat's nose twitched and she looked to Sam with an arched eyebrow. Sam waved her hand in the air, dismissing it as Trina likely being too asleep to think.

"Yeah well, I mean emotionally, Trina. On a deep level. You're a great person, you're beautiful, no man in their right mind wouldn't fall in love with you-Seth was insane to turn you down like that. I happen to think you're a good person, so don't you listen to your sister's friends. They don't know anything. You're as capable of being loved by any guy as anyone else is."

"Yeah. Right. I…hope not. I feel sorry for any man that falls for me."

"Trina, that's not true-there's no truth to what the others have said."

"That's coming from me, not them." Trina let out a loud yawn. "I'm going back to bed now. Goodnight Cat. Thanks for the…you know." The phone beeped and Cat frowned. Sam reached over and rubbed her back.

"Do you feel better now that that's off your chest?"

"Actually, I do. Though, hearing what Trina said…I-do you think it's too late?"

"Well, nothing is ever 'too late', but keep in mind Trina's half asleep right now."

"Yeah. I hope it's not too late. Maybe I could try being her friend too if you're going to?"

"Always possible. I think you'd be a great friend for her to have around."

* * *

><p>A good decision on Cat's part there I'm sure, at least she got that over with even though Trina was half asleep and a little startled.<p> 


	8. Morning Talk

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 8 (Morning Talk)<p>

Waking the next day Sam came across an urgent sounding text from Trina, which consisted of only the words 'help me'. Worried something may be wrong, Sam called her. When Trina answered, she sounded more annoyed than upset. "I usually work on Wednesdays, but Tori's got this performance she's doing that night. She's making me go."

"Oh." Sam chuckled nervously and scratched the back of her head. "Is that all?"

"Is that all? It's going to be boring as shit." Sam chuckled at Trina's dead serious tone. "It isn't funny! I've got stuff to do but she's insisting, so I'm going to go just to get her to stop hassling me, but I don't want to go alone because I'm going to be bored as hell. Would it be okay if I asked you to tag along tomorrow? As a friend to keep me occupied with anything other than my boredom?"

"I'd be happy to. It can't be that bad." Trina hissed at her, causing her to chuckle again.

"You don't know my sister. She only sings annoying pop music, rarely anything else. Country? Nope. Rock? Not a chance. Now if she tried rap that would be something…but _no_, it has to be bloody pop!" While she felt for Trina, she was grateful that Tori was giving this opportunity. She preferred country to pop any day, but she wasn't about to turn this down.

"Let's appease your sister and go to her performance. What's the worst that can happen?" Trina paused for what a long time, and when Sam was about to say something more, Trina replied.

"I fall asleep and wake up to find myself surrounded by rabid preteens feeling me up for items of value that they can pawn off to the nearest merchant?" It was an interesting choice, though she couldn't help to wonder why she thought of preteens in a situation that seemed more appropriate for homeless people or robbers in general.

"Why preteens, Trina?"

"What person in their right mind goes to a performance at a high school by a former student singing other artists' pop music?"

"Good point." Sam paused for the moment and sat up, leaning against the headboard. "So what are you doing today? You don't work, do you?"

"No." Trina let out a groan. Sam's heart lifted and the girl cleared her throat. "Tuesdays and Thursdays are strange days for Tori and myself. On Tuesday, mom stays home and makes me go through the house-literally cleaning every fucking inch while dad takes Tori out to dinner. On Thursday it's reversed, mom makes Tori do the cleaning while Dad takes me out."

"Oh…well at least your father's doing something with you guys."

"It's just for appearance, really." Sam frowned at the words and looked idly at Cat's empty bed. She took a deep breath and waited as Trina went on to elaborate. "Dad's got to be seen with us, but he also legitimately tries to get us to think he cares about us by taking us out. It's just, well, good luck talking to that man about anything, he never takes a genuine interest in either one of our lives it seems." Trina paused for another moment. Sam listened as the girl dropped something on a surface.  
>"Well, I suppose he should get credit for 'trying' right? Mom's idea of quality time with her daughters is 'let's clean the house! I'll sit and do my nails while you do all the work!' Real fuckin' perfect, Mom."<p>

"At least you and Tori have Saturday. Right?" She heard Trina laugh and was happy to hear a happier tune in the girl's voice.

"I suppose so. Tori and I started that tradition many years ago. You know mom and dad separated once when we were kids?" Her eyebrows drifted up. She pushed the covers off and threw her legs off the bed. "Mom and dad got back together so they avoided a divorce. Tori and I had been separated in the process-for some reason Mom took me and left her with Dad. When we got back together it was Saturday morning. From that point on we decided to devote every Saturday to each other should it happen again that we're separated because of our parents."

"Wow. That's devotion." Or at least that's what it sounded like, and it was a good tradition to keep up. Hearing this made her understand more about why Tori reached out to her to help Trina. "You guys kept that up for all these years?"

"Yeah. I mean we forgot some Saturdays just because it's hard to stick to it every single week, but we did our best. We still spend the day together."

"Mind if I ask about Sunday?"

"Tori told me she invited you and Cat to church, I guess you're wondering why I don't go. That should be obvious-being that you're a former, well…you know. Or are you wondering what I do?"

"Yes."

"Lounge around the house usually. Sometimes I go for a jog, sometimes I practice up on martial arts. I don't work Sundays, in case you were wondering." There was a pause, followed by the sound of a soft ball hitting a wall. "Sam, can I ask something?"

"Sure."

"I was thinking about Cat's phone call last night. Love…Have you ever felt it?" She took a deep breath and contemplated her answer.

"I have. As a matter of fact, I'm engaged to the very man. He is in the army like I am, but I opted for a career path as a counselor. Derek is overseas right now."

"You miss him then?"

"I do."

"And he…trusts you?" She could hear the sense of hesitancy mixed with urgency in Trina's question. It was obvious why she would ask that, knowing about Sam's past. "If that's personal-"

"It's fine. Yes he trusts me. Derek knows I'm out of that life and have no intention of going back. He was the one that persisted. I had a very difficult time believing in love or learning to trust, and he was there-never relenting. I don't know why, and though he tells me all the time, I suppose I'll never completely get it."

Then came the longest pause of all, making Sam check her phone eventually to make sure she was still connected. There was a quivering breathing noise on Trina's end, so she waited patiently for the girl to say what she was thinking.

"What. What is it like?"

"Have you never been in love, Trina?"

"…Once, and only once."

"Do you remember anything about the feeling?"

"I try not to. I'd like to forget. Makes my job easier. Not to mention that man wouldn't want anything to do with me, I'm a prostitute. I may force people to use protection or show proof that they're clean, but sex is sex to most guys. If he knew…"

"You never know. He could be what Derek was to me."

Trina took a deep breath and immediately protested. "No. I'm no one's love. I sell my body for a living, I'm not worth any man's wasted breath." Sam moved her hand up to her chest as Trina began to repeat herself. "I just have to keep saying what so many others have told me. No one likes me, I'm a worthless waste of space. Should never…never have been."

"Trina."

"No, I shouldn't have asked you that. I don't like thinking about him, it…it hurts. See you at Tori's concert tomorrow, Sam. It's at seven. Cat can tell you where Hollywood Arts is. I'll wait by the school's front doors."

"Okay." When the phone clicked off, Sam pulled it from her ear. For a flicker of a moment, she thought a breakthrough had been made. It was clear to her now how much damage the lifestyle Trina was living had impacted her. "She's relying too much on hiding behind that life. It'll destroy her if she keeps it up…"

The fact that Cat's talk with Trina had gotten through to her, making her ask the question she had was a grand sign. The girl wasn't lost yet, but she was in denial. Or at the least guarded to the point she's shutting out familiar emotions that ought not to be foreign.

"Alright," Sam exhaled slowly and moved towards her closet. "Got to be patient. Cannot rush the process. She will come around when she's ready. Until then, I must be patient and able."

"Sam?" She flinched and looked to the doorway where Cat was standing. "I thought I heard you on the phone. You just missed Dice, sort of, Goomer came over to let us know that Dice was selling tickets to a magic show and was curious if we wanted some."

Sam folded her arms over her chest and studied Cat with great skepticism. "Dice wouldn't come on his own?"

"Evidently he's still recovering from his illness." This was bordering absurdity. There was no conceivable way he was avoiding them just because he claimed to be sick, he'd come around when he was sick before. "You should have told Goomer to tell Dice to get his ass over here and talk to me. I don't appreciate people avoiding me. It makes me extremely uncomfortable."

"Goomer's still in the living room, I'll go let him know Dice is making you uncomfortable."

"Thanks." She put her hands to her waist and shook her head as Cat left the room. "I swear to god, teenagers are the strangest people." She had to remember she was once a teenager, though she'd never been a male going through puberty. There was always a chance, or at least she hoped it was only that chance, that Dice was starting to see women in a way that made him shy away from them.

Still, it didn't explain why he was okay with seeing Cat the other day and not her. There was only one explanation for it. As she thought on it, her stomach churned and her teeth ground together. "I hope to god he isn't avoiding me because he found something he shouldn't." She clenched her fists and started out the door. "If that's the case, he needs to fess up. At least let me know if he wants nothing more to do with me!"

For her, avoidance and silence was the worst way to end a relationship. It was more painful trying to be upset over not knowing why than it was to know the reason. Then, she knew she needed to practice patience with even Dice, this avoidance may not be as bad as she thought. If it was what she suspected, he could very well be trying to recover. She had to give him a chance to explain, if he ever decided to show his face.

* * *

><p>So a good chat with Trina, it would appear.<p> 


	9. Seeking Council

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 9 (Seeking Counsel)<p>

Walking into the living room, she saw Jade sitting on the couch. Her muscles tensed as the girl's piercing brown eyes drifted to her. "Good morning," Jade stated abruptly, "You just missed the dumber portion of dumb and dumber." Of course she was speaking about Goomer, but Sam remained unaffected.

"Cat didn't mention you were over."

"Just got here." She followed her wavering gaze to the kitchen where half-eaten pancakes were. "Cat left the room, didn't want to talk to me." Jade rolled her head back and exhaled slowly. "Kind of wanted to talk to you, though." Sam responded with a curt nod and moved over to the couch.

"Cat isn't too thrilled with you guys." She squinted and studied Jade closely. The girl was speaking in a slurred manner and her chest was moving much slower than normal. She had red patches on her skin indicative of scratching, and the tone to her skin was abnormally pale. "You alright, Jade?"

Jade's head shot up and her eyes widened. "What?" Sam noted the girl's pupils were incredibly small. All these signs were concerning. Her expression softened and she moved her hand towards her pant pocket. "Right, I came to talk to you, not Cat."

"I'm here. What's the matter, Jade?"

"You're a counselor. That's established." Jade removed her hand from her pocket, she was holding a small white cylinder. Sam's heart fell when she spotted the painkiller, it was as she feared. "I need help."

She stretched her hand out, holding her palm upright. Her eyes locked with Jade's and watched as the girl studied her hand. "Let me have the bottle?" The girl didn't look as bad as Carly had when they found her, but still an addiction to painkillers was devastating. Once she had the pills, she pulled her hand back and looked down at them. "Oxycodone."

Oxycodone was a painkiller designed to treat moderate to severe pain and it was an opioid. Jade nodded slowly and began to shiver. "I take anti-depressants, I take anxiety medication, and painkillers. It eases things, makes me feel good-makes me feel better. I need help, Sam."

"You're not wearing any makeup either, I see."

"No. This is me." Jade spread her arms out and locked her jaw. "I-I got into a fight with Beck. Over my dependency to them." Sam set the bottle down beside her legs and smiled politely at Jade. "I didn't think I had a problem, and he wouldn't stop saying I did. I-I hit him." The girl brought her hands up to her face and stared at them with a trembling gaze.

"You hit your boyfriend?" Seeing this as not just a cry for help but a possible counseling session, Sam glanced around to ensure Cat wasn't around. "Let me start off by saying anything you tell me is between me and you, okay?" Jade's hands fell to her knees and she choked out a sob. "Would you like to go to the back room? There's more privacy and Cat will not overhear."

"I think I'd appreciate that. So you'll talk to me? Listen?"

"I will." They moved to the back bedroom and met Cat while she was on her way out of the bedroom. Sam asked her to stay in the kitchen and living room, so the girl obliged. Once in the secure location, Jade took a seat on Sam's bed and leaned up against the headboard. She was in position directly in front of Sam, who was sitting down at her desk. "So tell me about this fight with Beck. Why did you hit him?"

"Because he wouldn't stop telling me I had a problem. Which clearly I do." Jade threw her arm out and pointed to the pills. A weakened whimper left her lips and she pulled her arm back in a quick motion. "That's when I remembered you said you were a counselor."

"I'm not a fully established one yet."

"Yeah well, I don't feel comfortable going to Lane. Not many of us do. Besides, I'd rather talk to a female." There was nothing wrong with that, and Sam wasn't going to turn anyone away. At the same time, she knew there were times when she may have to refer her to someone else. At her boss's place there were several counselors, male and female, that could help Jade out.

"Okay, I understand. So why do you take all these medications?"

Jade's muscles tensed and her mouth twisted into a scowl. "You're the counselor, shouldn't you know?" She did know, but the idea was to get her talking.

"I want you to tell me."

"Okay, fine." She folded her hands over her waist and closed her eyes. "Mom has always been abusive to my dad, to me. I ended up taking painkillers to make it easier, so I didn't have to feel anything. They worked, physically…emotionally."

"So you became dependent on them?"

"They were the only answer I had. I'm old enough now that I could move out, but I can't find a job anywhere." Sam looked to the top drawer of her desk where she kept many of her brochures. There was a brochure on _Save Haven_, which was a place that anyone, men or women could go to and seek shelter. "When I hit Beck, I saw…I saw I was becoming like my mom, and I don't want that!" Sam turned her eyes to Jade and saw the girl shaking her head frantically. "I don't want to be dependent on those pills, but I've heard stories-things people go through when they get off. I'm scared."

"Then it's better to start now before it gets out of hand." She opened the drawer and removed one of the flyers in the front. "I would like to give you something that will be a good tool for you to use." Jade leaned forward, her eyes studied the brochure with intrigue.

"What's that for?"

"Save Haven, it is a shelter for men and women that are victims of domestic violence, recovering drug addicts, and-" She saw the girl twitch and lowered the brochure to her lap. Jade rubbed her arm and slowly shook her head. "What is the matter?"

"I don't like thinking of myself as a drug addict."

"I understand." Sam raised an eyebrow and met Jade's wavering gaze. "Sometimes it is not always a bad thing. When you think about it, just understand that you have an addiction to something-we are all addicted to something." Jade crinkled her nose and furrowed her brow. "You know that Cat has an addiction to that Bibble stuff."

Jade laughed and quickly swept a tear from her eye. "Yeah. I don't get it, I can't stand it." Sam curled up the corners of her lips and nodded once.

"You know those_ Little Debbie_ snack cakes?" Jade's eyebrows rose. Sam put her hand to her chest and shut her eyes. "I probably have five boxes in the freezer." The girl laughed in response. She was glad to see her relaxing for the first time since being here, since that's what she was hoping for.

Sam reached for the bottle of pills and held them up, showing them to Jade. "Painkillers are easy to get addicted to if you have an underlying reason. Those who suffer from abuse can easily get addicted to them because-as you just said-it makes you feel good."

"I never thought painkillers were bad."

"They're not. Not like Heroin or Cocaine would be. However, if you take enough of them, they can be just as deadly." She set the pills back on the desk and took a deep breath. "The reason something becomes an addiction is because, while yes the particular item is an additive, the person may not be utilizing their self-control mechanism. Desire can very easily override that."

"Self-control. Beck says I have none. Last thing he said to me before I hit him. It was a punch too…but he may be right." Sam furrowed her brow as Jade's shoulders rose and fell. "A few years ago I went into the nurse's station at the hospital when Tori was giving blood and destroyed the pack so they'd drain her again, all so I'd get a part in some lousy play."

"I see." That was a terrible thing to do to someone, especially since it could likely result in a fatality. "What made you do that?"

"Jealousy, I didn't think Tori should get every lead part in everything. I know now that it was wrong."

"That's key." She snapped her fingers and Jade glanced up at her.

"What is?"

"You just said it. You 'know' it's wrong. If you know something isn't right, you have more control over whether or not you do it. If you can control yourself over impulse, then."

Jade moved her right leg over her left and leaned her head back as a look of contemplation came over her. "I just thought of something. I know therapists and counselors are required to report things…"

"Yes. By law if you tell me you're being abused and you are a minor, I need to report it. Now if you're over eighteen, I don't need to." She folded her hands over in her lap and frowned at the girl. There were a number of things counselors were legally bound to report. "If you were a danger to yourself or others, for instance if you told me you were planning to kill somebody."

"You'd have to report that."

"Yes. Same if you said you told me you were going home right after this and planning to harm yourself."

"I understand."

She let out an exhale. "Still we are bound by a confidentiality clause, so nothing you say here is anything that I can repeat to anyone. Still, in regards to abuse or any of those other things that I just mentioned, I should at least discuss options you have because it is part of the therapist job to ensure the safety of those they're counseling…"

"Options?" Jade pushed herself closer to the edge of the bed and sat up. "I don't see how I have many. I don't have a job or enough money to move out, and trying to not be dependent on painkillers is going to be hard in that environment."

"The lack of having a job or money doesn't necessarily leave you without options. As a student of psychology, I am a grad student, I am not currently fully equipped to handle certain things that aren't in my initial realm of specialty. I am studying primarily in areas regarding situations such as sexual abuse, prostitution, drug and gang violence, and so on-but it's broad. I am able to counsel on issues such as abuse, even family disputes and couple counseling, but those are a little out there for me."

"So if Beck and I were to come to you seeking help?"

"I would have to be honest and say that I need to study more on the subject and give you the option of referring you to my mentor or one of the counselors on the base that I work with. That said, as I am still just a grad student my scope is limited. That's the reason I'm not fully established yet. I have more to learn."

"I understand." Jade pressed her lips together and turned her gaze towards the bottle of medication. "I came to you because I thought it would be better that my parents don't know I'm seeking a therapist. I don't have money for full counselor either."

"That's why I'm offering you the _Safe Haven_ brochure. They do not charge for a session and can go over all the available options that you can do to better the environment you're in." Jade started to smile and reached for the brochure. Sam watched her open the booklet and read. "They're stationed here in LA, not far from the base. You know how to get there? I can take you if you'd like, or give you directions."

"No, I've been in this area a couple times. I'll go." Jade stood up and looked once more at the pills. "Um, keep those by the way."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. So, do you have to tell your mentor that you spoke to me?"

"Name, yes, subject matter not without your consent. Still even just a name is shaky, I cannot divulge your name to anybody in my personal life. For instance, I could not tell Cat that I have counseled you. Now if I were thinking about it, sure, but not after the fact."

"Is verbal consent okay?"

She had a fax machine in the living room beside the television, it made things easier to get from her boss. "She prefers written. Most professionals do, myself included. Verbal is not always trusted for obvious reasons."

"Oh yeah, because you can say just about anything."

"Exactly. I can have her fax the document over if you'd like, then I'll fax it back to her." She may not have to fax it over since she had to go back to the base anyway.

"You really need to get like an office or something." Sam chuckled softly and stood from the desk, brushing her hands along her pants. "Anyway do you know Lane?"

"Not personally, no. He works at your old school, from what Cat's told me."

"He's a decent guy, good counselor. I've spoken with him a few times, he's just not that helpful. I think because he's just a school guidance counselor. I suppose they have their limitations too."

"Yeah, but as a counselor he should still be trained to handle the same things I am-such as drug, abuse, suicide, etcetera." Sam led her out into the living room where the fax machine was and dialed the number for her boss. She could see Cat through the glass doors out back, so there was no need to worry about her hearing anything.

Alice answered after two rings, asking how Sam was doing. "Hey Alice, I have someone who came to me for counseling, I'm referring her to _Save Haven_, but I need you to fax over a couple documents for her to sign."

"Okay Sam, what documents do you need? If you're planning on keeping her on as a client, then you'll need the contract." Those were always good to fill out regardless of whether they were to be kept on or not. It was always good to assume the possibility of future counseling.

"I will need one of those. The confidentiality agreement, and she's requesting consent papers allowing me to discuss her credentials with you."

She felt Jade tap her on the shoulder and glanced back. "If you think it's good to get information from Lane, feel free. I know I've told him a lot of stuff in the past, just not about the abuse because of the whole minor thing." Sam nodded and turned back around.

"I also need some papers to allow me to connect with the counselor at her former high school. She is asking me to gather paperwork from him as well."

"I've got everything," Alice replied, "I will send it all now. You're doing a good job, still need you to come back in. I have more I would like to teach you. Also, do let me know if there is anything else I need to know."

"I'll fill you in when I come in tomorrow morning."

"How is your thesis going?"

"Very well, thank you." The fax machine started buzzing. Sam glanced over to watch as several sheets of paper made their way out one at a time. Jade practically fainted when she saw them stacking.

"That's a lot of paper," Jade moaned. "I didn't think I'd have to fill out a contract too."

"You do anywhere you go. Doctor's office, therapist, hospital, and so on."

"I know. Thanks for talking to me, by the way."

"Not a problem."

* * *

><p>A little flexing of the psychological muscles there.<p> 


	10. Stain on the Past

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: For those of you catching this now, don't worry, I've had to redo this chapter because I made a critical error. Carly's child is _Jessica_, not _Kevin_. Kevin is Spencer's son with Sasha.

* * *

><p>Chapter 10 (Stain on the Past)<p>

That evening while Cat was taking the kid they were babysitting out to eat, Sam had opted to stay home and work some more on her thesis. She'd gotten through a good portion of it and was going over notes she'd compiled. Mrs. Cleveland wanted her to start a folder on Jade West and put it in the filing cabinet that she'd given to her in the office. Sam also compiled some notes on Trina and Tori, and would be starting separate folders on them as well.

She heard a chime from her laptop and glanced over to see a Skype request pinging from Carly. Happy to hear from her, Sam set her notes down and answered the call. "Sup Carls," Sam waved once the brunette appeared on the screen with her toddler. She leaned forward, grinning at the child snoozing in his mother's arms. "How are Doug and Jessica?"

"Jessica's had a long day of playing with the kids at preschool." Carly kissed her daughter on the forehead and looked back with a heavy sigh. "Her father, on the other hand, is not yet accustomed to the fact that if you go into a preschool eating candy while picking up your child…the other kids will flock around asking for candy." Sam heard Douglas snort in the background and laughed as Carly scratched her hair. "Italy is a strange but beautiful place. I kind of miss the states though-how are you?"

"Good."

"I know you've been searching for that 'star client', have you found one yet?" Carly smirked at her and rolled her head to the side. "A big city like Los Angeles, you're bound to find someone."

"I've found…a family. I can't go into much more detail than that." Carly's eyebrow rose and she slowly shook her head. "What? That's just as good. A lot of people have issues that stem from family, mostly parental concerns. I have my focus on someone whose issues are so interconnected with their family that it seems I'd really have to counsel them all eventually. I don't want to, but if it comes to that, I will."

"I see. Must be fun. Freddie and Melanie still together?"

"Yep, and going strong." The couple was doing a long distance thing at the moment since Melanie went to a college in New York while Freddie stuck around in Seattle University. "Seems Melanie and I are in the same boat, both our fiancés are miles away."

"Yeah, but at least you two are doing well. You're getting along with Cat pretty well still? Have you told her about-you know what?" Carly's lips pulled back into a frown and Sam felt a sudden flicker in her chest. She shook her head and closed her eyes.

"I'm not sure I feel comfortable yet because I don't know if she's going to be that accepting. It's not really something you just tell someone, Carly."

"I know, but I'm sure it's bound to come up. We were on the _internet_ Sam, and just about everyone that knows about iCarly probably realizes what we were involved in." She was right, it was fortunate that so far nobody she knew personally-aside from a select few actually knew about her past. "Like it or not, we were involved in what we were. It's a part of our lives, Sam, we have to accept that."

"I thought I was accepting it better than you were." Sam tucked her lip into a smirk and Carly laughed. It was good that they were able to laugh about it now, a sign that they were moving on from it, albeit it was a slow process. "One of the kids we were babysitting stumbled onto a website last week. I thought Cat might have seen something about me with the way she was acting, but she didn't."

"Good. I can only wonder how many of our videos are still out there." Carly paused and her face tightened. "Truth be told, I don't think I want to know. I think you weren't involved in all the terrible things I was in."

"We both did it."

"Yeah but…you never shot with multiple at once. I don't think so anyway." Carly scratched her forehead and sighed. "Regardless, what's past is past. I think it's high time we just accept that." Sam lifted her eyebrows and gazed with pride at her friend.

Carly had come a long way, it was surprising. Considering all the crap Carly had been put through, since she got out of that life sometime after Sam had. Sam was lucky enough to avoid a lot of the risks. Carly ended up contracting genital herpes during one of the shoots, but had it under control with medicine. Fortunately neither girls contracted HIV, but they'd tested for it multiple times just to 'make sure'.

Carly leaned back in the chair she was in and studied the screen for a minute. "I told you I've been seeing a therapist too, right?"

"Yeah. I can tell you're making progress."

"You're a counselor so you probably know this, but my therapist told me it's a good idea to have a friend to talk to. To trust. Someone that's there, and I'm not _there_, I can't offer you physical comfort. Cat could."

Sam moved her hand up to her forehead and chuckled softly. "Carly. I don't need-"

"You still have nightmares?" Her muscles tensed. She furrowed her brow as Carly's face saddened and her eyes dipped down. "I still have nightmares, flashbacks. It isn't easy. Douglas doesn't like remembering all that stuff, doesn't like talking about it and I don't like talking to him about it all either, so I did tell someone that hadn't been involved. A good friend of mine here, and she's been a great person for me."

"That's good." She breathed in slowly and closed her eyes. "Actually I did run into someone recently. He looked so much like this one guy that..." Her eyelids tightened over her eyes and she shook her head. "Turns out this was that guy's brother. I guess while it's still the past, it's still affecting."

"It always will. It's just a matter of overcoming and not let it cripple us. Right?"

"Yeah."

"I bet Cat realizes you're holding back, not trusting her with something."

"She does ask a lot about you, about Derek and other questions about my past. I don't like talking about it, and she knows that."

"She seems like a nice person. You think she might be hurt thinking you don't trust her? I'm not saying tell her details, but if you think you can trust her, then maybe you should tell her a little bit…"

"I'll consider it." She already understood there was no possible way to escape the past, she hadn't run to Los Angeles in an attempt to run from it. No, she just couldn't bear the memories in Seattle. Still the part she was afraid of wasn't her history, but of the people around her. "I don't want to lose friends because I was involved in the sex industry."

"If you do, then they weren't real friends anyway. I shouldn't have to tell you that."

Sam laughed and turned her head down. "I know. Even Freddie became friendly with us again."

"Ah hell, I still think that was because of your sister. He never looked at me the same way again, at least."

She started to comment on the subject, but was stopped by the doorbell. Putting the laptop to the side, Sam moved to answer it. Astonishingly it was Dice, standing and twiddling his thumbs together. "Dice? Are you here to see Cat? She's out right now."

"I wanted to talk to you, actually." She leaned her head back and frowned as his eyes drifted up to her. "I er, want to apologize actually."

"Well come in, then." She felt a stillness in the air as he moved inside. Dice's shoulders were sunken and he still appeared gravely upset by something, though not as tense as he had been in the last few days. "What do you want to talk about?"

She shut the door and sat down in the recliner while Dice sat beside the laptop. Dice clasped his hands together and set his chin on them. He closed his eyes and exhaled sharply. "I don't want to stop being friends with you, and I'm sorry I've been making you feel uncomfortable the last week."

"You think you've-"

His eyes shifted abruptly towards her and "Goomer told me I was making you uncomfortable. I wasn't trying to avoid you, I just…This is really hard for me." She crossed her legs and folded her hands in her lap.

"Take it a step at a time then. I'm a counselor, it's my job to listen." Dice chuckled nervously and shook his head.

"Promise not to tear my head off?"

She tilted her head to the right and smirked at him. Her hand lifted up and her eyebrows wagged. "I promise nothing my curly haired, squirrelly friend." Dice laughed for a minute, then let out a gentle sigh.

"I should have just come to you first, I know, I just-I couldn't. It was difficult to…I-" She knew what was coming, and while it terrified her, she wanted to get it over with. What shocked her was that he said he still wanted to keep their friendship up.

"Spit it out. You're a twelve-thirteen year old boy, there's quite possibly nothing you can tell me that I won't expect." His eyes opened and moved slowly towards her.

"Even if it's that I experimented with pornography on my cousin's laptop?"

She pressed her lips together and held her breath for a second. Her eyes locked with his and she watched as they quivered anxiously. "You're at the point where you're going through puberty, certain images interest and entice you because you've never seen them before, and they'll give you a sort of inner sensation, feeling that is going to seem new to you."

His eyes widened and his hands shot up. "Yeah! I know, I get that." He moved his hand over his eyes and groaned softly. "I started watching, and I'm never going to watch again. I-I can't. The things I saw made me turn off right away."

Her fingers curled into her palms and her heart began to pound in her chest. The tension in the air grew heavy, but not to the point that she could no longer breathe. "What-or who-did you see, Dice. Be straight with me. We're friends, aren't we?"

"Of course!" He threw his head up with a whimper. She could see the anxiety in his eyes, he seemed to be terrified of the concept of lost friendship. "You and Cat are my best friends, my only friend-other than Goomer. I-I couldn't tell him, I couldn't tell anyone. I've been trying to get the thought, the image out of my head because I didn't want-I don't want to see…"

"You saw me."

He froze and tears began to well up in the boy's eyes. His face buried into his hands and his body began to shake. Sam let out a sigh of relief, glad to at least get that out into the open. She moved over to the couch and hesitated before moving her hand to gently rub his back.

"I'm sorry, Dice. I want you to understand that is a part of my past, it isn't my life anymore. We tried to get rid of all traces we could, my father and my friend's husband, some traces are still there." She smiled sadly as the boy lifted his head up from his hands. "How much did you see?" She was a little curious what video still existed out there, and in truth she hoped it was one of the lesser ones. Though no matter the content, it could still damage a person to see someone they know in a video. "At least now I understand why you were avoidant."

"I was only trying to recover, trying to forget so that when I see you I wasn't seeing that." He lowered his hands to his knees and tore out a rattling breath. "I didn't see much. I just…When I was watching these videos online-I only went to the softer sounding titles. I was curious!"

"There's nothing wrong with that. Don't think there is. It's normal for people to gain an interest in viewing that stuff…"

"Yeah, well, the one I saw that you were in was like-it just started out with your back and candles surrounding." She winced and closed her eyes, she remembered the video well. It was one of the softer ones, thankfully. Not to mention this particular one dealt with a good two minutes of foreplay and kissing before stripping, so Dice might have been able to avoid seeing too much.

"So when you realized who it was-"

"I shut the computer off instantly. When your face appeared I just…I couldn't believe it. I was so scared, I didn't want to keep watching-I don't want to see you like that, Sam."

"I appreciate you telling me, Dice. If you can remember the name of the title or website, I think I can contact my dad and get that video taken down." He nodded slowly and wiped his eyes.

"Why? Why did you do that? Is it okay that I ask?"

"I wish I could tell you. Part of it had to do with money, part of it was from the attention, and partly it just felt really good. I think another part was just wanting to do something with my friend-it was her boyfriend that got us involved in that life."

"You don't do that anymore?"

"I do not. It did a lot of damage. I almost lost my family over it, Dad kicked me out. Said so long as I was involved in that life I couldn't be under his roof. Thank god I had some friends to take me in-though they laid down the law and said I wasn't to be involved in that stuff. I did my best to oblige, but it was hard to break the habit. I did. The, um…pleasure that life gave me was not as important to me as my family and my friends. I had to realize that, and I did."

"I think I understand." Dice smiled at her and rubbed his neck. "I can live with that, I guess. I just-I'm sorry I didn't talk to you first. I think I was afraid you'd hate me because I even thought about watching that sort of thing, and then seeing you."

"You were afraid?" She laughed once and pulled him into a one-armed hug. She rubbed his head with her other hand, causing him to yelp and laugh out. "You're like a little brother to me. I was the one afraid. You think I didn't realize why you might have been avoiding me?" He leaned back and his eyes widened. "I thought you wouldn't want to be involved with us anymore because you might have seen me in something."

"Never! You guys are my best friends." He paused and squinted his eyes. "Okay. My _only_ friends. Dare I say the same? You two are close like sisters I've never had. I don't want to ruin that. You said that was just a part of your past, then that's fine. I just needed some time to get over what I saw, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you."

"It's fine. I'm glad you did, we got that out of the way. So are we good?"

"Yes."

"Glad." Her heart jumped with a joyous step. She hugged her friend and leaned back with a sigh. She had to wonder, if Dice had been so accepting of it, then maybe Cat would be as well. "Anyway, I forgot I was talking to a friend of mine. I need to get back to her."

"Okay."

"Will Cat and I see you around?"

"Most likely." He smiled at her and stood up, breathing in sharply. "I just wanted to come by and-well thanks for talking to me."

"Of course."

"I need to get back to my Aunt, I was supposed to be picking something up for her. I had to stop by since I was thinking about what Goomer said and all."

"I'm glad you did. I'll see you around, Kid."

"Bye Sam…"

"Will you be furthering your experimentation in internet pornography?" His face started to turn green and he shuddered in response. She folded her arms across her chest and smirked. "Thought not. Enjoy puberty, Dice, it'll only last another five years."

"Now you're just being mean." He smiled back at her and sighed. "Good to see things are normal."

"Oh yes. This changes _nothing_." Dice laughed and hurried out the door. She grabbed her laptop and raised an eyebrow at Carly's image. "Sorry Carly, I forgot you were still there."

"That's alright," Carly yawned, "I muted the conversation and went to put Jessica to bed. So what was that all about? That was your friend, Dice, right?"

"Yeah. Apparently he saw the start of one of my videos." Carly winced and Sam slowly shook her head. "He's been avoidant for a while, but I guess he was just recovering from the shock. He accepts that it was a part of my past, and he's still going to be a friend. I'm glad."

"Me too, but you see, that furthers the point I was making. If he was accepting, then maybe Cat would be too?"

"Yeah…I might try talking to her. We'll have to see." Her phone chirped and she picked it up, seeing the text from Dice. "Ah, I see he remembered the site and video. I can get that to dad so he can have it taken down."

"The perks of having a police dad, huh?"

Sam set the phone down and chuckled. "More than you know, Carly." There could not be many left, though people often duplicated videos and put them on multiple sites. Hers had been more protected to the point that it was hard to just copy and past a video onto another location, that made the removal of them easier. "It's a scary thought though, how much of us are still out there."

"With you? Not much I'm sure, you weren't involved in making _that many_. Me? I don't want to think about it."

"We both had a lot, Carly." She frowned as Carly's face tensed. "It's just a matter of how often we shot." At the same time, they hadn't operated that long. There were stars that had operated for at five or more years and only had a small few hundred videos. "I think Dad said he found and removed eighty originals of mine and a hundred of yours."

"I thought he found more than that?"

"His cyber team found traces of copies and duplicates elsewhere, but hey removed a great majority." She paused for a minute and looked towards the door. "But you're right, what you said before. That's a part of our past, it's best we accept and move on."

"But that fear…it's a very real one."

"What fear is that?"

"You know how Dice found that video of yours. What if-our kids grow up, they have kids of our own. Who's to say they won't one day stumble on a video of their mother, their grandmother."

"Yeah. We just have to be prepared for that. We have no choice in the matter, Carly." She closed her eyes and breathed in slowly. Many porn stars, both current and former did not realize that they would forever be a part of the internet. Those that did, likely did not care or think that it would ever come up.

It was a stain that would never truly go away, a scar that served always to be a reminder. "Besides Carly, we can't control other people. You can put sanctions and regulations on your kids when they grow up, make sure to know what they're doing online, but nothing's stopping a curious teenager from viewing pornography at a friend's house or somewhere else. That said, nothing's stopping them from finding something from so long ago."

"I don't even remember why I got involved in that, or why I even talked you into the lifestyle."

"You didn't want to be the only one that knew about it, so you shared it with me."

"Yes I know that, I just mean-I don't know what I mean."

"Emotionally, probably. We can't dwell on it, because we can never change that it happened, we can only do our best to move beyond it." Sam took a deep breath and slowly shook her head. "I'll tell Cat. I don't want to run the risk that she stumbles onto something accidentally. Seeing how Dice reacted…sometimes it's better to just be honest."

"Think Cat will take it okay?"

"I honestly don't know. I think she'll be fine with it so long as she knows it's in the past and has nothing to do with my life now. Dice was amazingly understanding, so I think she will be too."

* * *

><p>And chapter.<p> 


	11. The Survivor

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 11 (Survivor)<p>

When Cat arrived home that night, Sam was curled on the couch with a blanket wrapped around her body. Laughter came from the television, but the joke made by the characters had been lost on her. "What are you watching?" Cat made her way to the couch and looked towards the television.

"Some comedy that isn't all that funny." She was trying to calm her nerves so she could mentally prepare for what she was going to do. "I think I'm too into sociology that I'm analyzing the characters more than I'm enjoying the show." Cat removed her purse and laughed at her.

"You need to separate your career mind from your leisure, so you can actually _enjoy_ the things you watch." She waved dismissively and folded her arms around herself. Comedies never did the trick anyhow, her preference was geared towards the more serious dramas. Action and adventure was among her favorites.

"When you grow up enjoying movies like _The Expendables_, _Taken_, or anything with explosions, it's a little difficult to take comedies seriously." Cat scrunched her face and twisted her nose. Her hands fell to her hips and her head bowed.

"You're not supposed to take comedy seriously, Sam."

"I prefer sarcastic humor."

Cat's eyelids fell halfway and her arms dropped to her sides. "So then what was iCarly? A well-played drama?"

"Possibly." Though in all seriousness, life could be one drama after another. "I know we certainly had enough drama in our lives." Cat's eyebrows rose and she sat down with a sigh of defeat. Sam leaned away to the right and ran her fingers through the side of her hair. "Is something on your mind, Cat?" The girl's brow was wrinkled and her mouth was twisted in a deep frown.

"I was just thinking, I suppose I shouldn't bother asking you to elaborate. It's just, I feel like we're getting to be pretty close as far as friends go, but there's so much about you that I don't even know."

Carly's words flashed in Sam's mind and she frowned at her friend. The hurt in Cat's eyes was obvious. "It isn't that I don't trust you, Cat, it's just-"

"Then why don't you ever tell me anything about yourself?" Sam winced as Cat's gaze pulled up into hers. "Is there something you're afraid to talk about? I mean, everyone's got skeletons in the back of their closet. I wouldn't push you to talk about anything you didn't, but surely there's still some details of your past that aren't painful."

"You're right." She sat upright and exhaled sharply. "There's good stuff and there's bad. Anything you want to know about me, ask and I'll answer what I can." Cat's lips parted and her fingers closed around her knees. Sam watched the girl's shoulders move inwards together and her head bow. The energy in the room seemed to tense as Cat slowly shook her head.

"I uh, I don't really know what to ask about. I mean, obviously I know the stuff you have told me. Like about Carly, your sister, your fiancé…I don't know what specialization you're studying for, what your thesis is over-"

Sam leaned her head into her fingers and closed her eyes, sighing as she massaged her temple with her forefinger. "My thesis is in regards to the sex industry." Cat's head shot up and her lips formed an oval. "A counselor is supposed to be able to counsel any issue in regards to domestic violence, suicide, depression, addictions to drugs and other substances, and so on."

She opened her eyes and moved her head upright, then brought her arm down into her lap. After pausing for a few seconds, she took a deep breath and crossed her arms. "Most counselors have a degree specialization to what their primary subject is. So while I could counsel, say yourself, on depression or any issue you have-I specialize in understanding and helping those that have problems with the sex industry. Both people who are involved in pornography, prostitution, johns, as well as those addicted to such."

It was great to get this off her chest, but she still hadn't informed Cat of her own involvement. It was a struggle to figure out how to bring it up in a way that wouldn't cause her friend to fall away from her. Dice's acceptance of her past was still different than whether Cat would accept or reject.

"That's great." Cat shrugged and crossed her arms. Her eyebrows rose to the top of her brow and her body moved forward in a slight lean. "But why could you never say that? I mean, even the subject matter for the thesis, couldn't you share it?"

"I could. There is a reason I didn't share it with you, a personal reason." Cat unfolded her arms and flattened her lips together. Sam could feel her heart against her chest and closed her eyes, fearing a possible heart attack. "I…I was a part of that life in the past." Her words created a great deal of pain for her, but just like the tearing of a Band aid, they were needed.

Cat's hand moved up over her mouth. Sam opened one eye and frowned at the girl's stiff form. Her left hand remained in her lap, her right arm hovered centimeters from trembling lips, and her body remained unmoving. In that instance, the air around them felt as still as she was, and only the sound of the wall clock's second hand could be heard as though it had been placed inside a long tunnel.

The silence was broken when Cat lowered her hand and spoke in a hushed tone. "You were a stripper?"

"I wish." Even strippers had it rough, but in her experience it hadn't been as bad. Carly was the one that eventually went to work for a strip club, and the owners there forbade clientele from touching or having sex with the women. "I never went that route, but I can't say I was a prostitute either. I shot videos, I was a porn star for a short period."

Now out in the open she had no choice but to talk about that life. She thought it would hurt more than it did now, but she was more relieved talking about it than she ever was holding it in. This, she was already aware held true in most cases, which was the reason that counselors existed in the first place. At the same time, she understood the very hesitancy people had in opening up about things they've done or the ways they felt.

"Why? Why would you ever get involved in that?"

"Why does anyone, Cat? There are many reasons someone would, and then once in there, there are many reasons people stay in that life. One of those being simply that it just feels really good."

"But you're not-you aren't still in that?"

"Of course not. It's just in my past. I was afraid you wouldn't like it if I told you about it."

Cat leaned back and brought her hand up to her chest. "I _don't_ like it." Sam held her breath and watched as Cat pulled her hand away. "But that doesn't mean I don't like you. I may not like what you were involved in, but you're my friend."

"I know. It's hard enough for me to talk about the issue in the first place, but when thinking about whether or not it's going to affect the people you meet in the future…"

"Well, I am glad you told me. I don't want you to think I'm going to judge you or anything. Honestly, with the people I've been friends with, the last thing I want to do is be judgmental." Sam smiled at her and shook her head, she was amazed that this conversation wasn't nearly as bad as she imagined it to be. "So long as that life is a part of your past and not anything you're involved in now, I'm fine with it. Also, if you're too uncomfortable talking about it, I won't ask for any details."

"To be perfectly honest, I don't think you want the details." Cat scrunched her face and closed her eyes. After a minute, her expression relaxed and her head swayed from side to side.

"No. No, you're right I don't want to know details."

"Yeah. I'm just glad you never stumbled onto anything." Cat's eyebrow arched up and Sam let out a small whistle. "It was the reason Dice was avoiding us. My dad got most of the traces off but some stuff still remains, and he stumbled across a video."

"Oh my god!" Cat leaned back and brought her hands up to her chest, gasping out in surprise. "I think I see why you were worried what I would think. Do you want me to talk to him?"

"No." She raised a hand and Cat's brow furrowed. "He actually came by a couple hours ago, we talked about it. Everything's fine now."

"I'm glad. I would hate for anything to be awkward between everyone." As surprising as Cat's acceptance of her was, Sam could understand why she wasn't being nearly as judgmental as she thought. She was aware how tired the girl was of having judgmental friends of her own for the last several years, and the talk they had over some of the things she had done implied their behavior may have rubbed off on her a bit. That said, it was likely Cat was trying to be more accepting and aware of things than she would be normally.

"Something like this isn't worth losing friends over, and believe me, I've lost a lot of friends because of this. That's why I'd rather leave it behind me where it belongs and move forward. My philosophy is that just because it's a part of someone's past, doesn't mean it needs to rule over the present."

"I can agree to that. You must know it could affect the future, though."

"Yeah, I know that much. I don't like it, but I know it'll always be there. As far as porn stars go, I think Carly and I are a couple of the lucky ones." Cat's brow furrowed and Sam turned her head away for the moment. "Many die young, many have to live out the remainder of their lives with disease, or even knowing they don't have long because they've contracted something devastating like HIV. I was fortunate enough not to get anything, and Carly probably got one of the least worrisome STD."

"How did you get out, if you don't mind me asking?"

"I don't. My dad was a police chief, as you know. He was researching this suspicious porn site-there had been reports of underage models, among other things. He wound up seeing some of my videos." Cat's eyes widened. Sam's stomach tightened as she recalled the vivid memory of her father's anger.

"That's terrible." It was one thing to know your child was involved in that life, but it was another thing to find out while doing your job and seeing a video with your child with your own eyes. "What happened?"

"He said to me: 'So long as you are shooting pornography, you are not allowed under this roof'."

"He disowned you?"

"Not disowned, never that. He kicked me out of the house." It was bad enough that most of her aunts were the judgmental and stuck up type, to the point they pushed her father to disown her. "Thank god he never listened to my aunts, they all wanted him to drop me as if I was nothing to him."

"So…you were out on the streets? What next?"

"You know what happens to girls like me when they go out on the streets? It happened with Carly too, but Spencer _did_ disown her." The memory of Spencer telling Carly she wasn't his sister was vivid, but that came after he already found out she'd been shooting porn in his bedroom and continued to do so even after telling her not to. "I had a friend of mine, someone that dated Freddie many years ago and was dating an old ex of mine…long story how they met, and even longer how we became friends again. Not the focal point, the point is I went crying to Valerie after Dad kicked me out, and she took me in. It was through her and Jonah-they were engaged at the time-they helped me get over that lifestyle."

"Was it hard?"

"Very. I told you people stay in it because it feels good, and I loved how it felt at the time. I was willing to overlook some of the more disgusting aspects of pornography…" Cat wrinkled her nose and cleared her throat.

"You didn't say what happens to people that get kicked out like that."

"Getting to that." Sam took a moment to breathe and turned her eyes into Cat's curious gaze. "See, I was lucky. I had a friend willing to take me in, willing to help. Derek was Jonah's friend in the military, he kept persisting and insisting he cared about me in a way that was different than I thought. I ended up being able to join the army because of his father's status."

"His dad was in the military too?"

"Yeah, big military family. Now, the reason I didn't get worse…Carly got worse because she had no one to turn to. No friends were able to take her in, and she was too proud to ask for help-not to mention she was more hooked on the feeling of sex than I was. When Spencer disowned her, she was on the streets. She turned to prostitution, then went on to work at a strip club. It was great for her because it helped her get over some of the sex, since they were a club that forbade their workers having sex with customers. Unfortunately she, and a couple other girls were taken and put in a prostitution and drug ring. When I got back from my tour overseas, I was able to try and find her, to help her."

"And did you?"

"Yes. It turned out the reason she got into all this was because her boyfriend, now husband, Douglas had been overseas as well trying to stop someone in that gang. An assassin tried to kill him, but the people we were fighting overseas saved him. He was held hostage until Derek and I completed a hostage rescue and found him. We didn't know it was him at first."

"Wow…it does sound like you both had a rough time."

"Rough enough. After helping her out, we made sure to get away from that life. I'm here now, she's in Italy for a small time."

Cat leaned forward and hugged her, catching her off guard. She lifted a hand and gently pat her friend on the back. "Thank you for trusting me with this, Sam."

"Well to be honest, it feels good to get it off my chest."

As Cat pulled back, she could see an inquisitive look spreading across her face. "So tell me. Your dad, and then Spencer, did things ever get resolved?"

"Yes. My dad-and aunts all were amazed when I told them I was going to join the army." She stuck her chest out and smirked with pride. "When I told them I was clean, mom and dad couldn't be happier. Of course they welcomed me back home." It had not been a reunion without tears, both of her parents had been going stir crazy with worry and fear over not having one of their daughters around. "Even my aunts, although only one of them was really more bitter than the others, they ate their words and were more than happy to accept me back."

"Sounds like they didn't deserve your gratitude though."

"Well they're family, but back then my family's approval was everything to me. I needed attention from them, I needed acceptance, and when I didn't get any of it I got that attention and acceptance _elsewhere_." Cat nodded slowly and Sam folded her arms across her chest. "So it meant a lot back then to hear them all say they loved me and that I was a part of their family no matter what."

"That's good. What about Spencer and Carly?"

"Eventually he came around. After he saw how bad things got for her, he took her back in with open arms, promising never to let things get that bad again. I think Sasha had more to do with his accepting Carly back into the fold than anything, though."

"Sasha?"

"His wife now. She scolded him for disowning his sister and kept pushing him to do the right thing and find her. After I got back from Iraq, it only took a little extra prodding from me, and from Douglas, to get him to do the right thing. He never stopped loving his little sister for a minute, though. He was just too proud, and didn't like the fact that his sister was doing what she was while he was trying to get a second start at a law degree."

Cat's face went sour and she quickly shook her head. "God, I hate when people put their own reputation above their family! It just isn't fair."

"It's human nature. It doesn't make it right, but a lot of times people simply cannot help it. Usually they'll do the right thing in the end, if their hearts are in the right place."

"For someone that's been through all that you have, that is a _lot _of faith to put in humanity." Sam chuckled as Cat stood up from the couch. "And that's saying a lot too since I have even less faith in people!"

"Sometimes it's easier to believe in the good in somebody than to see everyone's heart as dark. Part of my job is also to help someone realize that." She snapped her fingers and pointed out to Cat. "Even those friends of yours are good people underneath all the judging and popularity."

Cat laughed as she moved towards the kitchen. "Yeah, yeah, I know."

Sam put her hands behind her head and kicked her heels up onto the couch. "So, what about you? If someone came to you after being thrown into the streets, would you take them in?"

"Considering the alternative? Of course. I'd probably prefer doing that for a friend than a total stranger, though, but I would want to help somebody if I could."

"That's good to hear."

* * *

><p>Well it's another step in the friendship and trust they have. Good thing Cat was accepting, and now they can move forward.<p> 


	12. Painful Familarity

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: READ PLEASE-Mainly for Invader Johnny and Fanfic-Reader, but I want all my readers to understand something, and I've also explained this a bit to IJ already. This is the sequel, while everything Sam has said to Cat, Trina, and Carly about her past up to this point provides the best recap for what happened in the first story, you have to understand Sam's character development took place in _that_ tale. The question of why she's able to see good in people or be caring in this should not be a surprise, if you think about it. In the first story it _was_ hard for her to trust anyone or see good in them when she'd been judged by so many, even her own aunts. Through the people that helped her, she saw good in them, and decided also to be a counselor so she could help people who were in her situation. There's still some development of character to be had, sure, there always is, but the good portion of lacking in trust and all that was in the first. Keep in mind that the first story is still in my story list on my profile _if _you want to read or skim it.

Another note, a little annoying but understandable, the question of Jade going to "Sam, of all people". Mainly fanfic-reader, bear in mind if you've seen Sam and Cat you know in that one episode they became great friends. Sam implies that this event occurred where Freddie came down to Seattle, the only difference is Freddie clearly wouldn't be acting the way he was in that episode. Now, whether or not that episode matters, in this story, you have to remember that Jade would only know that Sam is a counselor, and nothing else about her would be known in regards to past behaviors or life.

* * *

><p>Chapter 12 (Painful Familiarity)<p>

"You did not tell me she was coming," Trina said as she walked up to Sam and Cat. Sam looked to Cat with a nervous chuckle and shrugged as the redhead smiled and waved. "Why bring her?"

"I wanted to come," Cat answered for her. It had been her idea to show up at the performance with Sam rather than her other friends, and of course she pushed until Sam approved. "I was going to be here anyway." Cat bounced on her heels and swung her arms out to the two girls. "So I figured, why not come hang out with you and Sam instead of the others?" Trina frowned and dropped her eyelids halfway. Trina was wearing mini shorts and a powder blue tank top that revealed her midriff and appeared way too tight around her chest. "What are you wearing?"

"What I would normally, it's not your business." Trina crossed her arms and looked off to the side. "I guess it's fine if you hang, at least I'm not suffering this performance alone." She muttered something about missing work for the second night in the week. When Cat looked away, it seemed that she didn't hear.

"I've never seen you wear it, but okay." Sam raised an eyebrow at Cat, then looked to Trina, crossing her arms. Trina met her eyes as Cat spotted her teacher, Mr. Sikowitz, and walked over to him. Once out of earshot, Trina let out a groan and dropped her arms to the sides.

"I was hoping to sneak out and get to work during the whole performance. You realize Tori's not the only one performing, it's like a fucking talent show and I don't want to sit through the whole fiasco."

"You don't think Tori would come see you after her performance?"

"We're talking about the same girl, right?" Trina flipped her hair over her shoulder and laughed. "When it isn't Saturday and her friends are around, we're strangers."

"So why not tell her you don't like that? It seems like she does care about you if she's devoted enough to spend an entire day with you as often as she does."

"I suppose." Trina leaned towards the right and tucked her lower lip beneath her teeth. "It feels so weird not being out on the street right now." She shook her head and looked over towards Cat. "You said she chose to come on her own?"

"Yes. She wants to be friends."

"Why?" Trina tore her gaze away and arched an eyebrow. "No one wants to be friends with me unless they're getting something in return."

"I want to be your friend, and I don't expect anything in return."

"Yeah well, what I mean by that is usually they want sex." Sam cringed inwardly and watched Trina walk over to Cat. As the girls began chatting, she decided to look around and see what else there was or who else was here.

Her eyes froze on two people in the distance and her stomach dropped. One was a Latina girl with long brown hair and dark brown eyes, and the girl beside her was a pale girl with shoulder length auburn hair. She'd only seen them a couple of times in the past. "No," she whispered as the air grew heavy.

Her chest started to ache and her hands trembled as the two women made eye contact with her. "Hey look who it is," the auburn haired girl smirked and led the Latina over. "One of Seattle's former rising stars." Sam clenched her fists and turned up a polite, albeit fake smile. "The porn industry misses you Samantha. Where's Carlotta?"

"That's _Carly_, and she's in Italy. What are you doing here, Lexy?" Lexy Ball and Daisy Delmonica, two well known stars in the industry who had absolutely no desire to leave it. "Last time I saw you guys was at that ceremony in Washington." It had been an awards ceremony for popular stars many years ago.

"Well, this is our hometown of course. We're at this showing because we're recruiting. Also looking for someone willing to do a three-way with us." Lexy leaned forward and wagged her eyebrows. Sam sneered and stepped away from this girl. There were some people too dangerous for even a counselor to try and help. "Want to join? Get back in the act? There's not much better work out there."

"There's plenty. I'm a counselor now." Lexy snapped upright and her jaw dropped. "I help people who want to get out of that life. It's dangerous, as you well know."

"No more dangerous than prostitution is. Tell us, how's _Carly_ doing these days?" Sam narrowed her eyes as the two women started to laugh. Nearly everyone in the sex industry knew not only when the girls left, but that Carly got sent into prostitution. "Face it, pornography is safer, makes more money, and well…" Lexy twirled her hair and laughed. "It's fun."

"Sure." Sam closed her eyes and shrugged. "If your idea of fun is having five sweaty guys on top of you just so you can make fifty bucks for one shoot." She smirked and shot a glare at Daisy. "And yes Daisy, I'm talking to you."

Lexy scowled and Daisy began to encircle Sam. "Why bother, Lex?" Daisy crossed arms and spat at Sam's feet. "She's just become a stuck up, uppity little bitch. I guess that's what happens when you leave the industry." The woman smacked Sam on the thigh, causing her to grunt and take a sharp inhale. "Tell me Samantha, when was the last time-"

"You know what?" It was hard to resist the urge to push them away, but she knew better than to get violent. These two women had been in the life so long that their morals were so distorted that they most likely did not have their own sense of emotions in check any longer. "This is a high school performance, unless you're planning on recruiting underage people, you won't be finding anyone here." She clenched her teeth and began to lose sight of her better demeanor, ready to clash with these two women. "Go back to whatever murky pit you crawled out of."

"Oh I'm sorry, aren't counselors supposed to be caring and compassionate?" Daisy put her hands to her face and laughed. "Yet you're looking at us like we're filthy and disgusting."

"No. I don't think that about you at all, because I've been there." She circled the two and stepped behind them. Her eyes focused on Trina in the distance, still chatting with Cat. "I don't think it's filthy at all, I just think that you've been grossly misled down a terrible and dangerous path, and you're so deep that you can no longer see the light at the end of the tunnel. You've been abused, trampled on, treated like a sex object for so long that you think it's normal."

"You think you're better than us?" Lexy asked. "Just because you're not involved in that life doesn't mean you're any better than we are." Sam turned around and flinched as the girl poked a finger into her chest. "You're just as much trash as the rest of us, and don't you dare forget it."

"I never said I was better." Sam pushed the girl's hand away and held on to her rational mindset the best that she could. "I know the things I've done, but I also realized the effect my actions had on those that cared about me." She saw the girls roll their eyes, so she crossed her arms and fired back. "Let me ask you something, if I can. What do your parents think of what you do? How do your siblings think of you? Lexy, I happen to know you're the sixth child in your family, and Daisy, you got into porn to help your ailing mother didn't you? Now that her cancer's been long paid for and she's much better, you're still in the industry-does she not know?"

A look of pain shot through the girls' eyes and their shoulders fell. She didn't feel like twisting the knife further, but if she wanted to she might suggest in a sarcastic manner that their parents certainly must be proud of their children, but that would be to assume they still even had families to associate with."

"Whatever." Lexy lifted her shoulders and tensed her muscles. She leaned to the right and set her sharpened glare onto Sam. "We don't have to sit here and take this preaching, we've got a job to do."

"And what job is that? Recruiting? Who the fuck do you think you're going to recruit at a high school performance!"

"Not everyone here is a student," Daisy informed, "Obviously. We've heard through the grapevine that one of the local prostitutes is here tonight." Sam tensed and snapped her gaze onto Trina. The last thing she wanted to do was let the girl get involved in porn, and these two were not going to sink their claws into her if she had anything to say about it. "We'd like to get her off the street. Is that _okay_, your highness?"

"I don't care for your condescending tone." Sam cleared her throat and narrowed her eyes. "Believe me porn is not a good alternative to prostitution. Hell, pornography essentially is a glorified prostitution, you just get to show your breasts, your clit, your ass, and whatever's left to the entire world. While some man degrades you and has his way with you, strangers you don't know from half a world are getting off on it. Sure it feels good at first, but afterwards? After it's done, after the video is up, how can you say you don't feel like shit even for a split second?"

"We prefer not thinking about it. I think that's pretty obvious. It's just our job. Speaking of which, that prostitute isn't the only thing we're looking for."

"You mentioned looking for someone to do a three way?"

"Yeah, we hear there's going to be a martial artist and marine here." Sam raised an eyebrow and scoffed, there was no chance in hell a marine would take up pornography. "Since he's likely to be pretty strong, we want to try and talk him into shooting a video with us." Daisy swept her bangs out of her face and chuckled. "I mean come on. It's the chance of a lifetime and he wouldn't have to do it again, who would turn down two beautiful porn stars for a shoot?"

"I can think of several." She needed to find this man and warn him away. She knew the other person they were looking for, so she'd be able to guard her. "A military man isn't going to be so willing to shoot a sex video that is going to be put online for the entire world to see."

Lexy leaned forward and gently tapped her cheek. "Whatever you say, Sammy." The girl smirked into her eyes and leaned back. Sam's stomach twisted further as the duo began walking away.

Trina and Cat walked up to her, looking at the figures. "What was that all about?" Trina asked nervously. "Who were they?"

"Just stay close to me, Trina. If you run into those two, don't talk to them, whatever you do." She turned to face the girl and looked up and down her body. "And as a friend, can I suggest something?"

"Sure…"

"Put on a better outfit. Think about who you're going to be around tonight, people like your sister's friends." Trina's eyebrows shot up and Cat nodded. Even while Beck, Andre, Robbie, and any other guy in the place might stop to ogle her, it made it quite easy for both Lexy and Daisy to suspect that Trina may be the person they were after.

"Okay, fine! I'll put something more decent on. Do you have anything?"

"I have something," Cat chimed, "Some of the clothes I had to take to the cleaners the other day are still in the back of the car. Our washer and dryer broke down. I've got some sweaters and pants I think you'd like."

"Sounds good. Take me there." Cat took Trina by the wrist and pulled her to the car. Sam took a few steps after them, then stopped to look over her shoulder. She could feel a heavy sensation rising in her, followed by a flicker of desire to follow the two women. No, she was not free of temptation, even once out of the life it was something that would always remain there to try and pull someone back in.

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><p>The past does tend to be harsh on people who would like to forget. Well, Sam will be sure to figure a way to keep those girls from finding the two they're after, and at least one is already secure.<p> 


	13. Counselor's Sense of Urgency

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 13 (Counselor's Sense of Urgency)<p>

"Sam I'm curious." The girls were standing outside the bathroom, waiting for Trina to get changed into the new outfit she chose. Sam had her arms crossed and was surveying the area for the two porn stars scouring the location. "You were into internet pornography, what's the difference between that and prostitution?"

She raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "Not much. They're essentially the same thing, selling body for money. Porn stars just think of themselves as better, cleaner, and healthier than prostitutes. They're really not, and in some cases they can be trashier than prostitutes themselves." Cat appeared greatly confused, so Sam decided to elaborate. "A prostitute will usually, much like a call girl or private escort, only work with one or two people. They can also pick and choose who they get to have sex with while porn stars are given an actor and told that person is who they must have sex with. As for porn stars, there are those who will have sex with large groups. I once knew a girl that had sex with an entire team of men."

Cat's face went sour and she quickly shook her head. "I don't know how you did it, I can't stand the thought of all those guys…on or in me." The girl shivered and Sam smiled slightly.

"Well I personally didn't have group sex when I worked. I get what you're saying though, it gets pretty smelly and it doesn't feel good when it's all over. I can't count the times that I'd have sex, feel great, then afterwards just…" She paused and tensed her muscles. "I'd wind up crying in the shower, thinking to myself 'is this all I can amount to? All anyone's ever going to think of me, a sex object?' It wasn't pretty."

"Those two girls you were talking to. They were porn stars weren't they?" She jerked her head back and shot a glance at Cat. "I'm just wondering because they looked so mean, and you looked defensive."

"Yeah Cat…I knew them, but briefly. Not all actors in the industry are like them, though. Some are very nice people. The one woman there that I was talking to, the Latina, she went into the industry to help her mother pay for cancer treatment. So some do have noble reasons and just can't get out of the life later."

"Why is it so hard?"

"The sex industry is dominated by horny men, Cat. All they care about is fucking the next hot thing they can stick their sex organ into. Maybe I should say the porn industry, at least with prostitution men and women aren't just looking for women to degrade they just want sex. In many ways, prostitution is somewhat safer and cleaner than porn."

The door swung open, starting the girls. Trina stepped out, wearing a purple fleece sweater and knee length jeans rolled up at the bottom. "I'm done," she huffed. Trina stopped for a moment and met Sam's gaze. She frowned and her eyes flickered to Cat and back. "Hey Sam, before opening the door, I heard you talking…"

Her heart sank for the moment and she gave a sad smile to Trina. "Yes?"

"Porn stars think themselves better than other people?"

"A lot of them do, but many times it's just a mental disorder. Sometimes narcissism, some it's bipolar disorder…but yeah, there are those that think themselves better than anyone else, and that includes both prostitutes and strippers."

Trina furrowed her brow and tilted her head to the right. "Even though they're essentially prostitutes themselves." The girl scoffed and turned away. "Strange they should be like that."

"Sometimes it's just something they act like in order to deflect or justify the things they do behind a camera. No one person is the same though."

"Whatever. We probably should get in so we can at least show my sister I was here. I grabbed a list of the people performing-Tori's friends formed a band." Trina rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Just for this show. Apparently Mr. Sikowitz had to find somebody to perform vocals with them. I pity the guy that got suckered into that."

"Well, that should at least be entertaining to see."

Cat grabbed the flyer and her eyebrows rose. "Oh I remember Robbie talking about this! They wanted a male vocalist but couldn't find anyone to make a fourth person." Trina crossed her arms and Cat lowered the paper. "Robbie said the man Mr. Sikowitz found wasn't a singer but went along with it because the guys were talking about you and Tori as their friends."

"I wonder why the guy would be interested in my sister, or me, but then many men are interested in my sister. Why I'd be thrown into that pot, I'm not sure."

"I guess we'll see. If he knows one of you two, he could be using the boys to try and talk to you."

"Anything's possible," Sam remarked.

Once in the auditorium, they took their seats at the end of the fifth row from the stage. Several people performed various talents, ranging from monologues to singing.

Of course they walked in late, so it had been towards the end of the national anthem being performed by a group of military personnel and conducted by a marine. The man's back was to them. "I don't know what it is," Trina whispered, "But that marine looked familiar. Wished we got seated in time to have seen his face."

"Maybe he's in another act," Cat suggested, "I think Robbie said the guy Sikowitz chose was a marine that he knew." Trina's brow furrowed and her shoulders rose. Sam would be sure to keep an eye out for the man regardless, but was now piqued by the possibility that the man could have a connection with Trina. If any existed, it could be good, depending on the connection. "Do you know any marines, Trina?"

Trina laughed nervously and shook her head. "Not at all. At least, none on a personal and friendly basis."

"I bet you'd enjoy dating a military guy," Sam replied with a laugh. "My fiancé is in the army, I think I told you. You know, military men make the best lovers." Trina's cheeks turned red and she shook her head quickly.

"Military men…maybe. There was a guy, that one I mentioned to you before, who said he was learning martial arts combat skills at camp for when he joined the military. I don't know if he ever did or not." Trina's nose crinkled and she quickly turned her head towards Sam. "I've heard officers aren't always sent overseas like enlisted, is that true?"

"True? Eh, it varies with need, actually." Sam couldn't say it was true because there were times when officers would go overseas in a conflict, but it wasn't as often. Then it also depended on the career track. "Usually it depends more on the career track, a person trained to be a doctor or an engineer might go overseas more than somebody who is becoming a teacher or, like me, counselor."

"Oh." Trina crossed her arms and looked back to the stage. "That's good."

"Why do you ask, Trina?" Maybe it had to do with the man she met at camp. Part of Sam wished that she could find this guy, but another part of her was well aware she wouldn't know who or where the man was, and Trina would likely not want her going so far. This was a man that clearly had been a love of hers, and real love was at least one thing she hoped for Trina to discover. "Is it about that guy at your camp?"

She saw Cat glance over, interested as well in the conversation. Trina's lips pressed together and her shoulders slumped while her eyes dipped down. "I said I don't want to talk about him." Trina inhaled sharply and clenched her eyes shut. "But yes. I was just wondering. He was a couple of years older than me and had in mind to go through college first then hopefully the marines…I imagine he would go into officer academy like he said and become one.

"So you've never tried to find him?" She was going to stop talking about the man out of respect for Trina, but she did want to know why neither side ever made contact.

"I've lost his information and never quite told him mine. Doubt I'll ever see the guy again, and if I did, well…" Trina's eyes darted to Cat and she hesitated. Sam understood what she wanted to say, she could see the fear and pain on the girl's face.

"Cat knows about my past, so I will say this. My fiancé, Derek, I was terrified of going to him because of the things that I'd done. Terrified he would turn me away or think that I only wanted sex." Trina pursed her lips and Sam slowly closed her eyes. Her chest started to tighten and her body grew hot with the memories returning to her mind. "Yes that was the extent of what I thought relationships were all about for a time, but I was able to learn otherwise."

"I guess he didn't just want sex from you."

"No, he wanted a real relationship. For a while, I was afraid I couldn't give that to him." Trina's eyebrows curled inwards and she nodded slowly as an understanding gaze drifted onto her. "He wanted love from someone that didn't know what love was, I had to learn it. To see it firsthand. I saw from my friends, Valerie and Jonah what love was all about, and I tried to emulate them."

Sam's heart lifted joyously as she saw a spark of curiosity in Trina's eyes. Behind the girl, Cat was listening and watching with a soft smile. Sam lifted her hand to her chest and breathed in slowly. "When I did, it felt good. It felt good to cuddle by the fireplace and talk for hours, it felt good to laugh over a meal while going out on a date, or walking through the botanical gardens…it was amazing. Then the true love, that comes after a while. It's a feeling that when you experience it, you'll know it, even if you've never felt it before you'll know something's up."

"When did you know you were truly in love with Derek?"

Sam chuckled softly and looked back on a fond memory. "It's funny, but I think the moment I knew I was in love with him…he was trying to finish a crossword puzzle and every pen he tried to use was dry, so he wound up using a pencil-the led broke and he ran through the house trying to find a pencil sharpener. I was laughing the entire time. I had a pen in my purse, so I gave it to him." Trina chuckled and tore her gaze away, smiling at the performer on the stage. "He ended up staring at that pen for a full minute. The look on his face had to be the most adorable reaction of flustered confusion and relief that I'd ever seen from him. I think from that moment on I knew the way I felt for him, I couldn't feel for anyone else."

"It does sound nice." Trina crossed her leg over and shook her head slowly. "I don't have anyone to emulate like that. Mom and Dad always bicker, so I'm fairly certain they hate each other. The only other couple I know are Beck and Jade." Trina tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and rolled her eyes. "But they've split and gotten back together so many times it's startling. Not to mention neither of them like me, which I don't care about because I don't care much for them either."

"That is understandable."

"Hey guys, Tori's coming up!" Cat announced. Music began to play and Sam furrowed her brow at the familiar song. She looked up to the stage where Tori was standing before a microphone, her hair was done in curls and she was wearing a sparkling red dress. She had purple mascara and deep violet lipstick. Her nails were painted to match her lips.

She grabbed the microphone and closed her eyes, singing her rendition of _Roxanne_ by The Police. "This song?" Sam muttered to herself and looked over to Trina. The girl was watching with high brows and half a smile.

Perhaps this was the reason Tori wanted Trina there, aside from simple prevention of Trina walking the streets tonight. "She's actually doing this song justice," Trina stated. The next song she sang was _Family Portrait_, by Pink. Another song that was a clear dedication to someone, at least in Sam's mind. While Roxanne seemed to be for Trina, Family Portrait was clear to the Vega clan.

The mascara started running from Tori's eyes, her fingers flexed and her voice heightened at the peak of the song. Sam's heart tightened and she took a slow breath, wishing to know how she could possibly help the girl out. Unfortunately, it once again fell to the people in that family would want to have help.

Beside her, Trina was tearing up as well. "I need a moment," Trina wiped her eyes and stood up from the chair. "Sam, stay here and let me know what happens, okay? Cat…come with?" Sam was shocked to hear that, but figured it had to do with whatever the girls were talking about earlier while she was dealing with Lexy and Daisy.

Cat agreed and followed Trina off to the restroom. Sam remained to watch the next act. Four men walked onto the stage. Beck, Andre, Robbie, and the Marine officer that conducted the military band.

Two seats in front of her were Lexy and Daisy, she narrowed her eyes on them when she saw them glance at each other with full smiles and point towards the marine.

This man was in full uniform, held his cap at his chest, and had short shaggy brown hair. His soft brown eyes bore out across the audience and his mouth was turned up in a polite smile. "Hi, my uncle got me to sing with these guys. I'm going to do the best I can, but I should warn you, I'm not a good singer."

Sam folded her arms and leaned back, chuckling to herself as the man took the microphone in one hand. "Anyway, my name is Jason. Today we're going to be singing our rendition of an old classic: _Have You Seen Her_, by the Chi-lites. The guys agreed to this song since I agreed to sing with them. It's seriously one of the few songs I can actually sing well." He smirked while the others shrugged. "Okay, let's begin."

Beck, Andre and Robbie harmonized while Jason started the spoken process of the song. There was a look of sorrow in his eyes that seemed to match the mournful tune in his voice.

When they reached the chorus, the boys joined with Jason in the singing. It was much like a barbershop quartet, and it was a nice change of pace for Sam to relax to. Her body relaxed as she found herself tapping her foot along with the snaps of their fingers.

When she looked at the doorway to see if Trina and Cat were coming back, she spotted them standing there. They were watching the group with a focused gaze. Trina's lips were parted slightly and her face bore no emotion that Sam could read. Cat looked as if she recognized the soldier. It would be something she'd consider asking the redhead.

As the song came to a close, she could see Lexy and Daisy rise up from their seats. Her heart stopped as a sense of danger filled the air.

One thing was certain, if Cat or both girls had any knowledge of this soldier, then it expedited the urgency to keep those girls away from that man. Surely the Marine could handle himself enough to ignore them, but the two were not the type to take 'no' well.

Now was the time to start prioritizing, however. She wanted to find Tori and see how she was doing since it was clear through her shaky tone that she was breaking down halfway through her performance. She wanted to talk to Trina and see if she was okay as well, then she was curious if and how Cat might recognize the soldier, and then there was the evident assumption of danger.

Whatever the case, she did want to get the two women away from this school above all else. Nobody should have to be tempted by them.

* * *

><p>Okay, your thoughts.<p> 


	14. The Marine

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 14 (The Marine)<p>

"Follow me," Sam urged while passing Cat and Trina. They looked at her with confusion, the performances were nowhere near finished. However the other two women left as soon as the Marine left the stage.

"Shouldn't we stay for the rest?" Trina asked. Sam stopped moving and looked from the left to the right. The school had a much longer hallway than the high school she'd gone to. "There are at least five performances left. I know Tori's not in any of the remainder, but…"

"You know those two girls from earlier?"

Trina furrowed her brow and nodded. "The porn stars?" Sam looked over her shoulder with a brisk nod and Trina crossed her arms. "What about them? I thought we were just going to ignore them."

"We were." Sam took a deep breath and frowned. "The thing is, they had their eye on someone they wanted to get to shoot a video with them." Trina uncrossed her arms and Cat pulled her hand up to her mouth. "A soldier. Of course, no Marine in their right mind would shoot a porn film, but those two girls are persistent as hell. I know them…personally. I think I figured out who they've got their eye on too."

Trina's voice lowered to a whisper. "What?" The girl's voice trembled and her muscles tensed. "Who then? The guy singing that song?"

"Yeah. They left just after he finished and left the stage."

Trina's face tightened, then she quickly shook her head. "Okay." The girl cleared her throat and closed her hands. "Hussies." Sam raised an eyebrow at Trina's muttering and stared at her for a moment. "They're hussies…" It wasn't so strange to hear her calling the two porn stars that, but it was still a bit startling.

"Let's just find them. I want them out of this school, so let me do the talking." She was going to try and be as peaceful as she could, but if the girls began to talk down to her as they had before, it might be difficult. "You girls didn't happen to see Lexy or Daisy move past you, did you?"

"I did," Cat replied. Trina looked at Cat with wide eyes and made a swallowing sound. Sam was beginning to grow concerned for her, but she hadn't found anything to base any kind of assumption. "They went out of the second doors over there."

Cat pointed at the double doors a few feet down the hallway. It was near the stage exit and at an intersecting hallway. "They went down the left hall. I guess out towards the exit of the school. The only thing down that hallway is the exit to the rear parking lot."

Trina huffed and began walking towards the hallway. "If the guy's Sikowitz's nephew, I'm surprised he didn't go to Sikowitz's office." Sam raised an eyebrow at her, startled that the girl knew this information when she hadn't been in the audience at the time Jason introduced himself. Then again, she and Cat could very well have been at the door when he started.

"Do you girls know him at all?" Sam walked alongside them and turned down the hallway. "Cat, I know you looked like you recognized him." Cat nodded fervently and turned her lips up into a bright smile.

"I do. He was visiting his uncle, our teacher a year or two ago when we were all doing an activity of sorts at Mr. Sikowitz's house. We weren't supposed to break character, I broke character so I could tag along with him to some movie premiere."

"Ah. I see. How did that go?"

"Yeah Cat, how did it go?" Trina's lips pressed together and her arms folded across her chest. "I don't even remember Tori mentioning him, though I do remember Mom and Dad saying that all of you guys invaded them on their anniversary." Cat chuckled nervously and ran her hand through her hair.

"Yeah well, about that. It was alright, but I remember Jason really wanted to visit the Vegas. It got late and neither you nor Tori were home when Mr. and Mrs. Vega finally came downstairs and demanded we all leave."

"Oh yeah, I was doing something for school, I think. Mom and dad called to say Tori was still at Mr. Sikowitz's place, so I went to spy when it was getting really late. I thought it was kind of odd to be staying so late at a teacher's house, you know."

"I guess I can understand that. Plus, Tori did say you were there to pick her up that morning. You never went home?"

"Nope. Slept in my car."

Sam was amused and glad to hear there was such love that Trina had for her sister that she would want to watch over her in such a manner. "I would do that for Melanie." She scratched her neck and chuckled to herself. "Actually I think I did do that with the first guy she ever dated, and then when she had her first date with Freddie. I made damn sure to watch them."

"Why?"

"Because that little guy was always obsessed with Carly. Even when we dated once, he told me he 'loved' me, then once he dumped me he was back to obsessing over Carly." Sam crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "I highly question whether he ever cared about me. So when he started to date my sister, I made sure to watch them-even after I got started in…you know."

"I understand." Trina lifted her shoulders and smiled at her. "I do the same thing with Tori sometimes when she goes on a date. We're all each other has, so I don't want any guy hurting her…and believe me, I know what some men are capable of."

"Right." When you've been in the business of sex industry, it was rare to meet a man or woman with absolute good intentions. "But regardless, he and Melanie are doing great, I think maybe it was because they grew closer over the fact that he was always trying to be there for her when they found out about Carly and myself."

"It was hard on your sister?"

Sam frowned and nodded once. "Yeah, she took it very hard. Most of my relatives did." Trina pursed her lips and looked towards the ground. She mumbled something, but Sam couldn't hear it. "Let's move on from this."

"Yeah…I'm not feeling so good right now."

"Why not?"

"My stomach hurts. Feels like I'm going to throw up." Trina did seem nervous, especially after having seen the Marine. Though, mentioning that Lexy and Daisy were probably looking for him as well made Trina's nervous demeanor grow worse.

"Just relax. What are you getting upset over? Talk to us, that's what we're here for."

"It's nothing. Really." Trina took a deep breath and stopped before the exit door. "You know, maybe you guys should go out, I'll wait here…"

"Okay then, we'll be right back." Sam stepped outside with Cat and started walking. When she glimpsed over her shoulder, she saw Trina following several paces behind and moving incredibly slow. "Hey Cat?"

"Yeah?"

"You said this guy was looking for the Vega family. Was there any reason why he might have been looking around?"

"I didn't want to say anything cause I can't really remember, but I think he might have been looking for Trina. His mom and dad lived in Texas at the time and were traveling, so he was visiting for a few days. He had to leave the next day, I remember that."

"You think he might have been looking for Trina?"

"Yes. Not sure why, though." Sam snapped her fingers and moved her hand up to her mouth. She had to wonder if it was possible that this man was the same guy from camp that Trina had met years before, but she didn't want to ask because there was no confirmation yet. It was only in theory.

However, if he was, then Trina's nausea and the way she was acting now would make sense. "He may very well be that guy from camp…"

"What?"

It would be painful for Trina to see him, especially if Lexy and Daisy were bothering him. Connecting with the fact that Trina called them a couple of hussies would certainly give substance to the theory that this man and the guy from Trina's camp was one and the same.

"Cat, keep an eye on Trina. If I'm right, she may not handle this well."

"Handle what? What are you thinking?"

"That this guy is the same guy from Trina's camp experience." Cat's eyes widened and her jaw fell open. "I'm not sure though, but you can tell she's acting strangely, right?"

"I was wondering why she was acting like that…"

When they turned the corner, they could hear what sounded like an argument. As suspected, Lexy and Daisy were standing in front of Jason, and he had was staring at them with firm lips and flat eyebrows. "I said no," Jason muttered. "I'm going to my car. Alone. Heading back to my apartment. _By myself_. I want nothing to do with you two."

"We could at least make sure the film doesn't show your face," Lexy insisted. Jason rolled his eyes and continued towards his white Mustang convertible. "Come on, two beautiful girls-what man would resist that? We won't charge you anything."

"For the last time, get away from me."

Daisy reached over and put her hand on his shoulder, causing him to stop and glare at the hand. "Consider it appreciation for your service to our country," she stated.

"Get. Your hand. Off of me." He pushed her hand away and narrowed his eyes. "I want nothing to do with you or what you're trying to send my way. I don't want to shoot any video, I don't want any part of myself on the internet, and if you do not stop harassing me, I'm going to call the cops."

"At least hear us out!"

Jason spun around, growling angrily. "I said _no!_ N-o, do you not understand what that means? Go away from me. Now."

Sam was impressed with how strong his will was. When she glanced back over her shoulder, she saw Trina watching with misty eyes and tearstained cheeks. She stalled as the girl choked out a quiet sob. There was also a hint of joy in Trina's eyes, perhaps due as well to Jason's own willpower.

"But you don't have to be alone tonight," Lexy continued, "Just let us in." The woman circled him, sweeping her arm sensually across his chest. "Such a strong, handsome man. No one has to know…" He pushed her hand away, tensing further and speaking with a stern voice.

"I just said, do not touch me. I won't say it again, leave me alone."

"What is your problem?" Daisy raised her voice and stomped her foot on the ground. "You act like you're holding out or something. Jesus, you got a girlfriend or something? Does it even matter?"

"I don't have a girlfriend, as a matter of fact." Jason narrowed his eyes and his jaw tightened. "But I am looking for someone, only one person, and I'm not giving up on her for the two of you. So." He bared his teeth and spoke through them. "Go away."

"Well who says this person wants anything to do with you? She's probably forgotten all about you and doesn't even care who you are!"

Jason froze and Trina let out a loud, tremendous gasp. Sam flinched and looked back just as Jason's eyes shot up. "Trina?" Trina's hands moved to her mouth and the moment her eyes mixed with his, she turned and ran, much to Sam's disdain. "Trina!"

Sam's heart fell when she looked back, this was confirmation enough of her suspicion. Only, it was truly a hellish way to find out and she regretted having let Trina follow.

Jason started forward, but Lexy and Daisy grabbed his arms. His eyes widened and his muscles tensed. Sam knew what was coming now, and of course the last thing to do to a soldier was grab them so suddenly. "I said get away from me, damn it!" He pulled himself from them, the force sent them stumbling back and falling towards the ground. They looked up at him, smiling widely as he glared down.

"Do it again," Daisy remarked, "We'll do whatever you like."

"What the fuck is wrong with you women!"

Sam rubbed her forehead and closed her eyes, sighing heavily. "This is going nowhere." She turned to Cat and motioned in the direction Trina had left. "Cat, go console Trina for a bit. I'll be right there after I deal with these two." Cat nodded and left without hesitation. Sam walked up to Jason and whispered. "If you want them to leave you alone, stay quiet and follow my lead…"

Lexy pulled herself up and dusted off her pants. "Ugh, what are you doing here Samantha?" The girl narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms. Sam spread her feet apart and mimicked Lexy's posture.

"Wondering why you're harassing _my_ person." The right corner of her lip tucked upwards and she slanted her eyes as both women raised their eyebrows. She knew how to play at their game, so all she had to do was make them think she was back in the industry and already claimed him. The one thing that could be said of the two that she remembered was they were at least respectful of when another porn star didn't want them zeroing in on their 'job'.

"What do you mean? You're not in the business!"

"Oh, I thought it over, and actually I am back in the business." She uncrossed her arm and moved closer to Lexy, hovering her face inches from the girl's face. "A more private, lucrative business than yours. You've got an amateur boy director no one knows about, I've got Leroy Ballinger." The girls gasped loudly and exchanged concerned glances.

Leroy Ballinger was a true professional director in the porn industry, as well as the CEO of a very famous magazine that rivaled Playboy and Hustler. From memory, Sam recalled that his office was somewhere in Los Angeles, so it would help her story to drop his name.

"Yes girls, he discovered me when I moved here. Now I just needed to find a client, and well…" Sam chuckled and walked over to Jason, sighing heavily. Her smirk deepened and she motioned her head to him. "I found this one earlier tonight. Not to mention, I've already claimed every business and zone on this block…you girls are invading _my_ zone, and you need to back off."

"But-but we-" Lexy and Daisy were trembling and stuttering to get a word out edgewise. It was one thing to drop the biggest name in the industry, but it was another to declare a potential competitor was taking work from one of his alleged models. Ballinger was well known for his ruthlessness in the industry, he could destroy even the most minute and amateur star out there with a flick of his wrist.

"All I have to do, girls." She circled them, and when behind them, leaned in between the two. "Is call Mr. Ballinger up and tell him what you two are doing…and you two will never shoot another video again." The two gasped and held their breaths. "So I suggest if you want to keep your hides in the job market, you leave this school right now…and _maybe_ I won't call my boss about two little annoyances in my area."

"Okay! We'll leave this place alone." Lexy sighed as Daisy started to whine. The woman rubbed her forehead and groaned loudly. "Shut up Daisy! Let's just leave. I feel like such an idiot."

As the girls took their leave, Sam turned towards the very confused Marine. "They fell for that hook, line and sinker."

"You were one of them?"

"A long time ago. You learn a few things. I don't deal in that anymore…" Sam stepped forward and looked towards the space where Trina and Cat had been. "So, you know my friend?"

"Yes, where did she go?"

"I think…you'll need to be a little patient." She didn't want to come outright and tell this man what Trina had been up to. In fact, that was something Trina would have to do herself, but even still, the girl needed to be willing to come to him on her own. "You're going to have to let her come to you. You said you had an apartment?"

"Yeah, but…I just want to talk to her. I've been trying to find her for, it feels like an eternity."

Sam pressed her lips and nodded. "I understand. You…may have to wait just a little longer." He raised an eyebrow and looked in the direction Trina had gone. "I can give her your address if you'd like."

"I would…You don't think she doesn't want to see me, do you?"

"I think she needs time." She couldn't push Trina to do so either, but at the very least, she could talk to her. "You met her at a camp for martial artists, I hear?"

"Yes. It was so I could further myself in joining the Marines."

"You love her?"

"Yes. Without question." Sam smiled at him and looked into his eyes with pride. "I never stopped looking." There was a sincerity in his eyes, giving Sam a sense that this man would be willing to accept Trina regardless of the lifestyle she may be involved in. Rather, it was a similar look that Derek had in his own eyes when they first met.

"Then don't give up. I'll talk to her."

"Would you tell her I still care, and that I've never given up?"

"Sure. I know as a military man, it isn't easy for you to be patient. I'm in the army myself, was stationed overseas, and I know how very direct our personalities are. Sometimes the best and only thing we can do, however, is wait…" Sam folded her arms and breathed in slowly. "And that's what you're going to have to do. I'm sure Trina will find you when she's ready."

"I understand." He nodded once and looked over his car. "Those two women? I won't have to worry about them?"

"No, I don't think you will." She did feel bad for running them off the way she had, but she couldn't think of any other way to get the job done without it escalating into a fight that needn't happen. So the way it was handled was likely best for everyone.

* * *

><p>There is that<p> 


	15. Concerns of Two Vegas

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 15 (Concerns of Two Vegas)<p>

She found Trina in the back, behind the school. The girl was seated on the ground with her knees against her chest and her arms wrapped around them. Her head was buried into her knees and her sobs were like thunder in the sky. Cat was seated beside her, gently rubbing her back.

"Trina?" Sam approached her slowly and waited as the girl looked up to her. Tears had stained her cheeks, and her eyes had puffy red sacks beneath them. It was a look that was all too familiar.

"I can't see him, Sam. He'll hate me." Sam opened her lips, then looked towards Cat with grave concern. It would be difficult to talk to Trina when Cat was sitting here. Trina swept a finger beneath her nose and followed her gaze. "I-I told Cat about what I do…" She raised an eyebrow and knelt beside her.

"Why?"

"I was being stupid and complaining about having to be here and it slipped out what I'd rather be doing." Sam looked over to Cat and smiled at the girl. Cat had a look of understanding, but at the same time there was also a deep sadness and guilt to her eyes. It was good to see Cat was still with Trina even after that, it said a lot about how well the girl tried to hold onto her friendliness, or perhaps she was just tired of being known as associating with judgmental people. "Are-"

Trina stopped and Sam snapped her gaze over to her. "Are what, Trina?" Trina shook her head and began to shiver. "You can talk to me, to us, we're here for you."

"Those girls. If that's really what porn stars are like…You know, I was considering going into that." Her body tensed at Trina's words. She relaxed herself and reached over, gently rubbing Trina's back. "After seeing that, I don't think I even want to consider that life. Not that it would matter much."

"It's not all it appears to be, no. What people see when they're watching from their homes is just the initial sex act, not the abuse that is behind the camera." Trina's eyebrows curled in towards the middle and Cat turned her head with a cringe.

"I wouldn't let anyone abuse me. I still know how to fight, _and_ I carry daddy's gun in my purse all the time." Sam leaned back and Cat's eyebrows shot up. Trina had already told her of her martial arts experience, but not about the gun.

"You carry your father's gun around?"

Trina pressed her lips and nodded once. "When I was younger and Dad was…better, he would take me out and teach me how to handle a gun. He actually was also the one that first started teaching me how to fight." Trina wiped her eyes once more and breathed in heavily. "In fact, while working, this one guy started to force me when I said no, and I fought him."

Cat moved her hand up over her mouth, gasping in shock. "Oh my god, someone tried to-"

"They didn't get far," Trina rolled her eyes and let her legs fall as her arms wrapped around her stomach. "When they started coming at me after I turned their money and offer down, that's when I started fighting back. I know how dangerous prostitution is. This guy wanted to do, um…" She peered down and closed her eyes, groaning softly. "He wanted to do something I don't offer services for, so I had to turn him down."

"You did the right thing," Sam replied. It was difficult to hear, but she was extremely grateful that Trina at least could handle herself.

"Yeah, but enough about that. What about Jason? What happened?"

"Lexy and Daisy won't be bothering him anymore. He wants to see you."

"He can't. He can never see me. It's too much." Her eyes drifted to the right and her breath fell from her lips as her shoulders sank. "He'd hate me, reject me because of what I do. I just know it. And I-I can't bear that. I don't know why, I just, I think I'd fall apart…"

"You met him at that camp?" Cat asked aloud. Sam was caught off guard, since she hadn't expected Cat to say anything. Trina's lips curved up slightly and she nodded.

"We were, I guess you could say in love. One time we snuck away from the cabins and…" Trina's cheeks began to turn red and Cat gushed. "It felt so good being with him. I feel bad, actually." She bowed her head and cleared her throat. "When we left, I never thought I'd see him again, and I missed him. I-I wanted to recreate that feeling that I had, what we had."

"And did you?"

"No. I started sleeping around with people I would meet on the streets, sure the sex and attention felt great, but it didn't feel like him. So now I just do it for the attention, I guess. I don't _want_ to stop, it isn't like it's affected anything…"

"Can I ask another question?" Trina's eyelids closed over and she took another deep breath. Sam was amazed that Cat was taking the lead in this, but it was nice. There was something familiar to her in this moment, a part of her that reminded Sam of Valerie.

"Sure, Cat."

"I know this might be a little inappropriate, but…Do you make sure to get yourself tested?" Trina let out a nervous chuckle and ran her hand along her neck.

"Yes. I don't have any STDs. I just got tested last week. My mom works at the hospital and we've all got health insurance, so Tori and I actually don't have to pay too much of a co-pay to be seen by the doctor that she's a nurse for." Trina lowered her hand and the corners of her lips fell to a frown. "Most of the people that I have sex with have condoms, and I only have sex with one person at a time. I _do_ have rules, standards, and if they refuse them…I know how to fight, and like I said, I've got my dad's gun as well. Never had to use it, but it's there."

"I don't think Jason would judge you. I mean, _I'm_ not."

"He's in the Marines now! They have even more regulation, of course he'd judge me."

"He loved you, Trina. Why would that change?"

"If I told him I was a prostitute, he'd turn me away faster than anything." Trina crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. "Not to mention he'd ask me to stop, and…I don't know if I can-I don't know if I _want _to." Trina pursed her lips and shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. Stopping has never really crossed my mind. I don't know why, I just haven't thought about it."

"It's addictive," Sam replied, "So it's understandable. Still, I don't think you should discredit Jason so soon. Give him a chance whenever you're ready. See, I had the same feeling about my fiancé, Derek, but he turned out much different."

"Well, yeah but-"

"And I was into pornography. Derek had to contend with the fact that people all over the world could watch me." Trina's eyebrows rose up and she pushed down a hard swallow. "He persisted, I gave him a chance, and it was the best decision of my life."

"Well I don't know that Jason would persist."

"He has been looking for you all this time. I got a chance to talk to him for a minute or two. Jason seems willing to not give up on you."

Trina pressed her lips into a thin line and slowly stood up. "Can we just talk about something else? I don't want to think about this stuff anymore. I was perfectly fine before I saw him tonight…" Trina swept her hands along her pants and drew out a long sigh. "Now where's Tori? Last I saw, she was bawling her eyes out mid song. I want to figure out what's going on with my sister."

"I think she's in the janitor closet," Cat answered. Sam raised an eyebrow and started to question it, but decided against. The tone in Cat's voice was casual, indicative that this may not be the first time someone went into that closet. "Jade texted me a little bit ago saying they were all trying to get her to come out, but she didn't want to see any of them. Not sure if they're still there or not."

"Then let's go."

When they arrived, they found Jade standing next to the janitor closet with Beck beside her. Andre and Robbie were on the other side, both trying to get Tori to come out. Tori would respond for them to go home, her voice had a slight tremble to it but otherwise it did not sound as though she'd been crying.

"What's going on?" Trina asked as she approached the door. The friends looked at her and each of them shrugged.

"She's got the door barricaded," Jade replied, "We've tried to push it open, but that's not happening."

Robbie's nose crinkled as he studied Trina. "Weren't you wearing something else when you got here?" Trina tensed and looked towards Robbie with a subtle smirk.

"No." Trina walked up to the door and pounded her fist on it. "Tori! This is your sister speaking. Come out." Sam walked up behind her and listened as she heard a noise from behind the door.

"I'm not coming out," Tori shouted back, "I'm trying to think! You can all leave me alone. I'll come out when I feel like it." Sam looked towards where the doorknob ought to be, but it was flat as though the door were a simple push door. There was a lock above the metal plate, but judging by what the friends said, and that Tori was inside, the door wouldn't be locked.

"Okay." Trina stepped back once and raised her eyebrows up. "Hey Tori, where are you in there? Back corner?"

There was a long pause, then Tori answered meekly. "Yes. The corner between the shelves on both walls. Why?"

"Because that way, I know you're safe when I do this…" Trina leaned back and lifted her leg, delivering a swift kick into the door. The friends jumped back as the door swung open and the items that barricaded the door slid out of the way. Tori gasped out as Trina slipped into the newly open space. "Hey little sis."

"Damn it Trina."

"I want to know why you're upset. You were singing your songs, then you started crying, and you ran off."

"You know perfectly well why I'm upset. I know you see how mom and dad are!"

Seeing that this conversation was turning into a discussion over their family, Sam instantly started to ask the friends to leave. This would be a personal discussion the sisters needed to have with one another, and not have other people listen in.

Jade seemed to understand, and helped get the others to leave when they were hesitant. Sam followed the group to the other end of the hall, out of earshot, and looked back at the door to the closet. After a few seconds, it shut, leaving the sisters to discuss whatever it was they wanted to.

She felt someone tap her shoulder and looked back to see Jade standing closest to her. "Sam, I wanted to say. I'm following up with that counselor you told me to see." Sam smiled at her and turned to face her. "I'm also going to check out that _Safe Haven_ place-I called them already and they told me they'd love to go over options."

"Well I'm glad to see you're following up on these things."

"Yeah, so I just wanted to thank you for hearing me out."

"No problem. How are things between you and Beck?"

"Things are okay. I'm going to start working on my issues, and he said he's going to try and be there for me through this process." She was ecstatic hearing about Beck's willingness to support her, it was always great to see such genuine behavior between lovers.

"Glad to hear it."

"Thanks." Jade looked at the closet door and frowned. "Do you think maybe you should counsel Tori and her sister? I mean, they seem to have a lot of problems." Sam raised an eyebrow and Jade quickly shook her head. "I'm not saying that to be mean, I just think they need help. Maybe that whole family needs help."

"You know they would have to come to me for that. Even in regards to the parents, I could counsel one of the girls and either one of them would have to convince their parent to come in for a session."

Counselors were able to request a client bring someone in to sit during a session so that they could try and work out the issue together, but they couldn't force the issue. That other person, be it a spouse, father, friend, or close relative would have to be willing to make that decision.

Not to mention, such a task would be difficult for Sam. She didn't know what it would entail to have that many disagreeable forces in one room together. "Besides, Jade, I've never counseled a full family before. It's one thing to try and be a mediator for an argument between two people, but when you get multiple people in the same room…"

"I'm sure you could do it. That woman you told me to talk to, your boss and mentor, she sounds pretty intelligent. I'm sure if you struggled with a client, you could ask her to assist and she would."

Alice would always be able to provide some sort of assistance, but still she didn't want to do so that often because it was important that Sam learn how to handle various situations without help. "She would if the client permitted that."

"Exactly. She's more seasoned and experienced, so that's a great help." This was true, but Sam hadn't really considered it for much. Alice had given Sam free reign for good reason. "You remember how I mentioned Lane?"

"Yes."

"He would do that thing that you see on stuff like _Full House,_ where he'd pass some item around and whoever had that item had permission to speak."

"I do know that method." She hadn't had to use it since up to this point she'd only been counseling one person at a time. It was a good method, and it did work, but wasn't as reliable as it could be. "I might try that if I ever do have to counsel more than one or two people." Sure it would happen at some point of time in her career, but she hoped later than sooner, even though sooner might give her more experience in dealing with multiple argumentative people in one room. "I'd probably go to Alice for more advice on that, however. There's always room for growth and improvement."

After some time, Trina and Tori emerged from the closet. Sam and Cat walked over to meet them while Jade made sure to keep the friends where they were. Too many people flocking around them at once might be a bit overwhelming for the moment, especially since both girls had their own reasons for their emotions being out of order tonight.

Tori's head was bowed and she walked slowly behind Trina. Trina's eyes were narrow and her body tense. "Mom and Dad couldn't be bothered to show up," Trina scoffed as they approached Sam. "Apparently Dad stopped by _Sandy's_ after getting through with the paperwork, and Mom's working late at work. As if…"

Sam crinkled her nose and raised an eyebrow at the sisters. "Sandy's?"

"Sandy's Bar," Tori replied with a whisper, "Dad called before the performance to say he couldn't make it. He was half drunk when I talked to him. Said Mom decided to work late at the hospital." Trina let out a loud laugh of disbelief and waved her hand dismissively through the air.

"Mom's probably off fucking Dad's former partner. You know, if I were married, at least I wouldn't cheat." Trina's brow furrowed and her voice grew in anger. "And that's saying something!"

"I see." Sam crossed her arms and drew out a heavy breath. "Tori, will you need a ride home?" This put her in a difficult spot because she had no idea what to do. Jade was right, the entire Vega family had problems, and this was one of those moments where the problems of the children were because of the problems of the parents.

"Yes. I was going to walk home, but Trina doesn't want me to. Says it's too late at night." Tori put her hands to her hips and shot a disapproving look at her sister.

"She's looking out for you, so it's fine. Cat and I will give both of you a ride home if you want."

"Thanks. I appreciate it."

Trina crossed her arms, her muscles tensed further and her narrow eyes sharpened. "Maybe you guys can stick around for a little while too?" Sam turned towards Trina, concerned by the girl's sudden question. "If dad is drunk, neither Tori nor I want to be alone in that house with him."

"Sure, we'd be happy to."

Trina rolled her head to the right and peered at Tori's friends. She clicked her tongue and closed her eyes. "Tori, you may as well invite those friends of yours over for a while."

"Why?" Tori tucked her hair behind her ear and shrugged. "Dad would just drive them out. When he's in a bad mood, he doesn't like them around. He knows they lie to him, Trina."

"Whatever. Just invite them over to play poker or something, would you?"

"Alright."

* * *

><p>So a little more info on what the family situation is like. Seems like clear father issues too, for both girls, which tends to be a factor in self-esteem factors.<p> 


	16. Belief in Potential

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 16 (Belief in Potential)<p>

The prior night, neither of the Vega parents wound up returning home. Tori called Sam the very next morning to say David checked into a motel during the night and she thought Holly might still be with Gary. It was semi-good news, because that meant nobody had to deal with an alleged angry drunk.

"It is not uncommon for a police officer to become an alcoholic," Alice was sitting at her desk answering a few questions that Sam had. The woman's small hands were folded over on a stack of papers in front of her, and her ruby lips were curved into a small smile. Her wise blue eyes were slightly covered by the brown curls in front of them, and her hair flowed down to her shoulders. "Why do you ask?"

"Someone I may be counseling has some issues with their family." Alice furrowed her brow and moved her hands together. "The dad works law enforcement and has been drinking heavily for many years. I was wondering if that was a common thing for police officers."

"Yes. You have to understand the stress that comes with the job they do. Alcohol is a depressant, but it's also a drug. When you drink, it makes you feel better. Police officers are among the groups of people who drink the most because it leads them to feel better when they have to see the things that they do."

"I understand. I just don't remember my dad drinking often, and he was a police officer."

"Remember that because it may be common for police officers to drink, not every officer does. Your father perhaps had more control over whether or not he drank alcohol." Sam nodded in response, she understood how that worked. It was a bit of a surprise to her when she heard that Mr. Vega's drunkenness was not an uncommon thing. It had been going on since Trina was at least nine. "Am I to assume you've found a client?"

"In a way. Though, not exactly in regards to what I'm specializing in." She was there for Trina as a friend, but Trina had yet to acknowledge a desire for help. "There's someone I'd _like_ to help, but as you've so often said, they have to come first."

"Right. This is the one you've been driven to help?"

"Yes, it's just that I see so much of myself in her. I've decided to be friends with her because I think that will be a way to help her." Alice hummed for a second and raised her hand up to her chin. "I know that's questionable, but as I said, she is not a client."

"That is fine, just be careful once and if you do begin to counsel her. There's still a thin line between counselor and client, just as there is for doctors and their patients, or any other professional and their customer."

"I understand." Sam breathed in slowly and closed her eyes. "Now, I _did_ get a client. Her sister." Last night Tori pulled Sam aside once more and asked that they have a session. There were some things she wanted to talk about and to get off her chest. "So, I'm going to have to start a file on her." Alice lowered her hand and tapped her red acrylic nails on the desk. The left corner of her lip pulled back into her cheek and her eyes continued to study Sam.

"Okay." Alice brought her hand up to her forehead, scratching at the top. "Well your new office is just about ready for you, so your file cabinet is there. I have to ask, does this girl's sister know that you and her sister are friends?"

"Yes."

"Alright. Just remember to be careful when forming any kind of relationship with a client or their family members. Once you start spending time outside of counseling sessions with a client or their relatives, you cross over the line that separates the professional from the patient. Once that happens, if you aren't extremely careful, you can run into some serious problems both ethically and legally."

"I will be careful."

"Good, because I don't want you to get in trouble. Even though if anything happened, it would fall onto me because I'm in charge here, you're still much younger than I am and you should be able to have your career without anything bad hindering it. A legal suit could still tarnish your reputation as well as any other counselor working for me."

"I understand, and I'll try to be extremely careful with what I do."

It was great that Alice looked out for her, and for the other counselors. Sam didn't want to do anything to ruin that. "Okay." Alice smiled at her and leaned back slowly. "I'd like to move into your office, there's a few things I'd like to discuss there."

"Gladly." She stood from her chair and followed Alice into her office. It was just a simple office space with a desk pressed up against the window, and a matching brown leather chair resting in front of it. On the adjacent wall was a brown leather couch and a recliner. On the right of the desk was a metal file cabinet with four drawers, each labeled with alphabetical ranges.

"The four drawers there are a start. It'll probably grow when you get more clients." Alice walked to the desk and swept her hand over the small desktop printer. "This is a fax machine, scanner and printer for you."

"So I've got my own space? Thank you."

"All with the plaque outside your door." Alice closed her eyes and flashed a bright smile. Sam wasted no time sitting in her brand new chair. She shifted herself into a comfortable position and let out a soft sigh as she relaxed into it and brushed her hands along the smooth surface of the polished oak desk.

In front of her was a new desktop computer that she could work at, she was almost ready to turn it on and begin figuring out all of its tools. "I'm not even a fully established counselor yet. I thought office spaces here were for the fully established ones?" She turned her chair around and looked up to her mentor with a concerned expression.

"Yes well, as you know, Carol retired last week and her office space seemed perfect for you. I know how well you and Carol got along as well, so I figured, who better to give her old office to?"

Carol had been in her late fifties and was like a grandmother to her and the other counselors there. She would spend a lot of time talking with the woman and was sad to see her go.

"I appreciate it." Alice was too nice to her, much like Carol. The woman wasn't like the idea of most bosses, and that was of a mean and bitter person who cared only for money. She was harsh if someone didn't follow the rules, but she was more like a mother than a boss, and that trait was the very thing that led the woman to giving Sam a chance. "I'll be sure to use this office right."

"Oh that's good." Alice laughed once and sat down in the recliner. She crossed her legs and folded her hands into her lap. "That's another thing I wanted to talk to you about. I'd like for you to start using this office." Sam's heart stopped and she parted her lips. Her nose crinkled and her brow furrowed. "It is yours now, after all, but still there is no reason to counsel people at your home. Any clients you get, direct them to your office."

"I…don't know what to say." She didn't think she was anywhere near having her own office to use, much less being treated as a full-fledged counselor when she was still basically an intern, a grad student.

"Just don't let me down."

"I won't."

"I know you won't." Alice pointed to the desk and Sam's eyes trailed in the direction of her gesture. Seated on the other side of the computer was a small black stand beside a desktop calendar, and in the holder was a bunch of cards with her name on it. "So, those are your name-cards with the address and your office number." Her breath stopped in her throat and she reached over, gently taking a card. "You can give this to your clients."

"I will. But, Alice, does this mean…" She exhaled slowly and looked back to the woman with wide eyes. "Does this mean I'll have office hours and people will be directed to me?" Alice leaned back in the recliner and drew out a simple sigh.

"Well, it's going to take some time at that. You will have office hours, but as for whether or not you'll be receiving new clients, not just yet. I'd still like for you to become more fully established, you may get one or two clients directed to you on occasion because you'll need the experience, but first let's just deal with who you have now. When you've got full certification, sure you'll get more clients, but for now most of the other counselors here will have to deal with them."

"Okay, I understand. Who's getting Carol's clients?"

"Most of them have been directed to Terrance, but those who had specified preference to have a female counselor have gone Angeline."

"Okay."

"Now the girl you've referred to us, I'll personally be counselling her unless you or she states a preference to you. Is that fair?"

"I think so. I think I'd rather leave that decision up to her." She would gladly counsel Jade if she wanted her to, but only if she stated a preference. For now, Sam didn't have much experience in dealing with what Jade's trouble was, but she could still do the job. "I think I have some research to do, though."

"Of course." Research was imperative to the career anyway, especially since there would always be newer issues popping up. "You do know if there's ever anything you need to know more about, I'm always around to help. Any of the senior counselors as well."

"I'll keep that in mind. My client asked me if it's possible for me to even try to talk to her parents, I'm not sure about that." Tori did ask if she could sit down with the whole family and try to iron out any issues they had. She couldn't give a definitive answer at the time, and was still unsure whether or not it would be a good idea. "From what it seems, the entire family needs some kind of help, but I don't know if it's within my scope."

"Well." Alice rubbed her chin and slid her fingers down alongside her lips. The woman furrowed her brow and dipped her eyes down onto her knees. "If a client does want you to, it is within your right to say whether you can or not, but I wouldn't unless you felt more comfortable with it. I can't tell you exactly what to do here because that decision is yours to make. Do what you think is best for your client, Sam."

"I told her that I would give it some thought, I'd like to have a few sessions with her first." Sam reclined and slid her fingers along the arm rests of her chair. "Do you think I'm going to have to charge my clients yet?"

"Not just yet, and that's part of the reason you won't be getting a lot of clients at first." Sam leaned forward and nodded. "When you become fully certified and licensed, then yes we'll give you a much more official status and your clients will be charged the same as they would for a session with any one of our other counselors."

"Okay, I suppose that does make sense."

"If anyone asks for you, they will be sent to you. If you begin to counsel anyone, they're under your scope unless you refer them. Does that sound good?"

"Yes." It gave her more of an availability to help those she already was. This was not an opportunity she would squander, though it did put some fire on her heels to become fully established. Though she had at least another year of studies left, she wanted to do as much as she could. "Thank you for everything, Alice. You've been good to me." Sam curved her lips up and chuckled to herself. "Too good, really."

"Well, I figured you deserved a chance." Alice folded her arms across her chest and smiled back at her. "You are not the first person to work here that had problems that led you to become a counselor. Sometimes people in those situations make the best counselors because they've experienced the same thing that their clients did, and so they understand and know how to help, oftentimes better than other counselors that never went through the particular crisis."

"So…you gave me a chance because you think I've got potential?"

"To put it simply, yes. I think you have potential to make a great counselor, especially in areas where both men and women have had problems with sex. Whether it's sexual addiction or abuse. Besides Carol, only Angeline have been able to really counsel people with issues regarding sex, having another on staff will be a great asset."

"Thank you again."

"Don't mention it." Alice stood up and looked to her eyes. "I'll leave you to settle into your new office. Your office phone is right there, along with all the numbers you'll need. Give me a call if there's anything you need."

"I will."

"Okay. I'll be working on the hours that I'll need you here. It probably won't be forty hours a week because you are still studying and need to work on your thesis, but it'll be at least thirty."

"Sounds good to me." As Alice left, Sam turned around and gazed out her window as a sense of serenity swept over her. It was nice to have someone who believed in her and didn't let the past dictate whether or not she'd have any use. Too often she'd been turned down because of her life, and so many times she'd only been disappointed. For Alice, there was nothing she wouldn't do, because thanks to this woman and no other, she finally had a chance to make a difference.

For Sam, Alice was more than just a boss or a mentor and more than just a friend to her, she was a savior. Whether she knew it or not, she was a role model and someone to look up to. Alice was a fantastic counselor as well, so Sam hoped to be just as good one day.

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><p>Alice is a good mentor to have, and a good boss. As Sam studies and grows more seasoned, she may one day make a great counselor as the other people in that office. To have that office room is a good sign of recognition, and a place for her to learn with less distraction.<p> 


	17. A Soldier Mind

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: Okay this is important-though it doesn't make a _huge_ amount of difference. I went back and checked, Sam and her fiancé are in the _Air Force_. I remember having to make that decision when writing the first story because the AF would be more lenient than the Army in this case.

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><p>Chapter 17 (A Soldier's Mind)<p>

"It looks like a fantastic office." Sam grinned as her fiancé studied the office from his side of Skype. Derek didn't look much different than the last time she saw him, aside from his newest haircut, which was now a buzz. He'd grown a goatee as well. "So that's your new hideaway?"

"Yes." She chuckled and studied his brown goatee with high eyebrows and a curious glint in her eyes. Sam swept her hair over her shoulder and cleared her throat. "So why the facial hair? I've never seen you with anything more than a five o'clock shadow."

"You like?" He scratched at the chin and wagged his eyebrows. Sam tried to visualize kissing him and could almost feel the bristles scratching at her face. Her nose and forehead crinkled and her shoulders rose.

"If it's what you want, I don't care." She folded her arms on the desk and leaned forward, sighing heavily. Their time was short since the Air Force didn't allow a lot of spare time for video chats. "I miss you. I'm glad I took the career track, but I wish I was with you."

"I think the General's right." She rolled her eyes and perched her head on the palm of her hand. Her lips curled up into a smile. "It's safer for you not to be out in the field at the same time I am. Plus, you're doing something you enjoy."

"Still calling your dad by his title? Even when he retires, are you ever going to call him 'dad'?" Derek flashed a grin and shrugged while Sam lifted her head up.

"I miss you too, honey. I hope you're settling in well."

"As well as I can. You know, I met a couple old…I wouldn't call them friends, but former coworkers." Derek frowned and his forehead creased as his eyebrows fell flat. Sam's stomach knotted up as she thought back onto Lexy and Daisy. "They were trying to 'recruit', and even tried to talk a marine into having sex."

"What happened, and are you alright?"

"Oh I'm fine." She pushed her bangs from her face and exhaled. "I sent them away and the soldier didn't even want them near him."

Derek laughed once and shook his head. "Not surprised, especially hearing it was a Marine. Those soldiers do not fool around, even here we acknowledge Marines as the top of the food chain."

"Yeah, I would have enjoyed joining them, but they wouldn't let me." She only got lucky enough to get into the Air Force because Derek's father put in a good word for her. "Marines, Army…they'd never let a former porn star or prostitute in their ranks. Hell, if one engages in participating in a porn video, they'd probably be discharged. No-nonsense mindset."

"Yeah." Derek leaned back in his chair and looked away from the screen for a second. "Still have a few minutes left. So, what are you working on, dear?"

"Alice has me researching another topic." Sam switched the screen over to her browser and raised an eyebrow. "Sexual abuse in minors and adults. With my area of specialization, the topic sort of goes with it."

"Oh." He rubbed his chin and slowly shook his head. "Tough topic."

"Yeah, but necessary." She rolled her head to the right and felt her chest tighten while studying the words on the screen. "There are a lot of monsters out there." She clicked the address bar and began typing. "I'm also researching substance abuse, alcoholism and a variety of other things I need to know more about." She raised her eyebrows and smirked at the camera. "Wouldn't you love to research all this?"

"I think I'll stick with guns, tanks, and planes. Thank you." Sam chuckled softly and turned back to the Skype chat. She laced her fingers together and moved them up beneath her chin while studying Derek. With Trina on her mind, she was curious what Derek's thoughts on how a soldier would handle themselves when questioned by people they knew. It was something she'd not discussed with him when he started dating her, but even he had to be affected by the actions she made.

"Hey Derek? Do you think a solider would date a porn star or prostitute?" Derek paused and his eyebrow began to rise as he pointed to his chest.

"You're asking me?" She rolled her eyes and curved her lip into a subtle smirk. The question came out wrong, and the answer was obvious when considering her own relationship with him. "Soldier or not, Sam, if a man or woman cares enough for somebody, then it doesn't matter what is in that person's life. Past or present. I've said that before I thought." He squinted his eyes for a second and started to frown. "Is everything okay? You're not having doubts are you?"

"No, of course not." She'd been down that road with him several times. It had been a slow process, but she knew where his heart was. "I mean like…how did it affect you, or those around you? I know you had friends and others, and we never really talked about how that life affected you."

"That's not really a conversation to have on Skype, dear."

"Humor me." Derek puffed his cheeks out and his eyes closed over. "Aside from Jonah, of course. I mean, he is the reason we met."

"Okay." She knew it was likely hard for him to discuss this, but they had always been able to discuss anything. Even when they first started dating she was just starting to get away from that life, but still felt its addictive pull. "Well I know with Jonah, we had to have a long talk about asking you out. He wanted to make sure I knew what I was doing."

"Yeah, I remember he was a little iffy at first. What about other friends?"

"Well, I mean you were a porn star, so of course people who viewed that stuff saw. Those of my friends that saw you in those videos, yeah, they gave me a hard time. It wasn't that big of a deal." He shrugged and Sam felt her heart sink a bit. She motioned for him to continue and he stared back with a crooked smile.

"You can tell me, Derek. I don't mind. What did you deal with? I want to know." Derek's forehead tensed and his shoulders fell as a defeated sigh drifted from his lips.

"Okay. Some people would make smart remarks, even asking in appropriate questions-like if you were good in bed and shit like that." Sam's body tensed and she dropped her eyes. "Other's made fun of me and some stopped associating with me. I even got into a few fights because of it."

"I…didn't know you went through all of that because of me. I'm sorry."

"No, that's why I didn't want to bring it up." She glanced back at the screen and smiled sadly. "It wasn't your fault, and I knew you would blame yourself. It's okay, Sam. I never let it bother me."

"You just said you got into fights."

"At the beginning. I've matured since then and learned not to let comments like that affect me. It doesn't happen anymore, of course, and I'm better off without those people in my social circle. Would you agree?"

Her heart lifted back up as his warm smile washed over her. She smiled back and nodded once. "Yeah, I'd agree." Her lower lip tucked in under her teeth and she furrowed her brow. "I don't know why you never really talked about this before?"

"Most military guys don't like talking about their feelings that much. Not to mention, it's like I said, I stopped letting it bother me and haven't had any problems yet. Yes, soldiers are very territorial, and yes it drove me crazy thinking of you with another man."

"You got jealous?" She grinned and her cheeks turned red. "I think you would have liked to punch out any guy I was with, but there are too many."

"Nothing a good AK-47, rocket launcher, and my favorite Desert Eagle wouldn't fix." He smirked playfully and Sam laughed. It wasn't a problem for her when he joked around like this, mainly because she knew he'd never actually go after anyone that she'd been associated with. It would be terrible for him to do something and get himself hurt or in trouble because of her past life.

"Yeah, but it's good you know I can handle myself."

"Of course. But you know better than anyone that you can't stop a soldier from getting jealous at times. Though maybe less jealous than annoyed at the other men."

"Yeah, but at the end of the day you know where I'll be."

"And that calms the soldier mind." He flashed a toothy smile and leaned back once more in his chair. Derek moved his hands behind his head and gazed at her with tender, loving eyes. "You know. I remember the first time you told me you loved me."

"Your reaction was adorable." She smirked teasingly and he laughed. The first time she said she loved him, he hadn't been expecting it. Many times he'd told her he loved her, and for the longest time she didn't know how to respond. Then one day it came out of nowhere and he looked shell-shocked. "I think you were just used to me constantly asking why you felt a certain way. I finally say 'I love you', and you look like a kid that just got told they're going to Disneyworld. I was always thinking, how could someone-especially a man in a military family love somebody like me. My own family turned me away, friends rejected me."

"I admit, there were times I worried that I wasn't good enough for you. A guy in my situation is going to worry about stuff like that at first, wondering if they have to compete or if they're going to be compared." Sam nodded slowly and pulled the corners of her mouth into her cheeks. She was well aware of that fear, and it was a legitimate one. "Then you'd ask me stuff like, why wouldn't I didn't look at you like those other men did, and questioning whether sex and love had anything to do with each other."

"I know the two don't necessarily mix. Though I will admit it feels right when it's with someone who cares about you, and vice versa." Their first time was a slow process. It was difficult for her, and he kept trying to make sure everything was okay and that she was feeling comfortable. It took many tries before they actually had sex together, and the wait had helped her tremendously. "You put up with a lot, Derek. I thank you for that. Just the fact that you were patient and understanding…" She yearned to hold his hand and cuddle up beside him. It was to the point that it broke her heart that they had to be separated by thousands of miles. "I love you. It still never gets tiring to say that."

"And I never get tired of hearing it." He smiled at her and blew her a kiss. "I love you too. I have to get off, but we'll talk later." She took a deep breath and nodded. "Keep up the good work."

"I will. Goodbye, sweetheart." The Skype call ended and her eyes moistened as she stared blankly at the screen. Her voice lowered to a whisper and she let out a heavy sigh. "I was one of the lucky ones, getting out of that life and finding someone like him…" It was reasons like this that she truly wanted to help people in the situation they were in. She wanted to show these girls that it was possible to find hope, that a future was always in sight. Even when at their lowest, there was always a light at the end of the tunnel, and showing them that light was more than just a job to her. It was everything she was passionate about to be someone that actually cared about the girls in that life and to help them escape. It was her life.

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><p>There is that chapter<p> 


	18. Tori's Session

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 18 (Tori's Session)<p>

"Thank you for seeing me," Tori said while walking towards the couch in Sam's office. The girl took a seat and set her purse carefully by her right leg. "Things have really been getting worse since dad started drinking again, and Trina's been well-you know."

"Worse how?" Sam crossed her legs and set her notepad on her lap. She wasn't going to start writing just yet, but needed to know that Tori would be comfortable with it. The girl's forehead creased and frown lines deepened around the corners of her lips. "May I ask what has led your father to drinking again? Also, when you say 'again'…"

"He was an alcoholic." Tori tucked a strand of her hair over her ear and pressed her lips together tightly. Her eyes seemed to grow hazy, which was a concern. "When Trina and I were children he was a heavy drinker. He wasn't very good to either me or my sister." Tori's fingers curled into the palms of her hands and her breathing started to become vapid.

Sam reached forward, setting her hand onto Tori's. "You okay?" Tori cleared her throat and shook her head rapidly. She moved her hand up to her forehead and sighed. "Yeah, I don't think I'm going to talk about my childhood right now. Kind of hard to remember a lot of it." She gave her a warm smile and nodded her head.

"Take your time."

"Thanks." Tori took a deep breath and narrowed her eyes. "Dad stopped drinking for whatever reason. He and Mom still fought a lot, but now their fighting's worse because of her affair, and I think that affair is the reason he's drinking again. As you saw a few nights ago, Trina and I aren't exactly comfortable with that."

"Is he seeking help for his drinking problem?"

"He knows he has a problem, and claims he wants to get better, but he doesn't think it's going to get worse because he's sure that he has control over it." Tori's frown intensified and a wrinkle formed between her eyebrows as her cheeks sank.

Sam raised an eyebrow at her and leaned back slowly. "You think he's going to get worse? Are you worried about him?"

"About him? Of course not." Tori's voice lashed out with bitterness, stunning Sam. She furrowed her brow and moved her hand up to his chin. "I'm worried about Trina, about myself, and maybe mom. I don't know, mom really got put into anything dangerous, she's just involved in that affair. Either that, or she's too busy being invisible to notice anything." Tori moved her hand up to her chest and water formed a thin line at her eyelids. "I'm just afraid. If dad starts drinking again…"

Sam watched as tears slowly ran down Tori's face and her shoulders started to rise and fall with a quick pace. Whatever was bothering the girl seemed to be taking hold, but she wasn't going to press. It was best to let it come naturally. "So." Sam reached for a box of Kleenex and handed it to Tori. The girl accepted the offer and blew her nose. "I'll surmise your father's drunkenness led to issues during your childhood, and you're afraid that if he's drinking again that he'll fall into old ways?"

"Yes. It's the reason I asked if you could have a session with my family. I just, I think it would help if everyone just sat down and talked things through." As Tori wiped her eyes, she let out a nervous chuckle and met Sam's gaze. "We all need help, really."

"I'm not sure where my boundaries are exactly. I can certainly try, but it is like I said, I cannot force the issue. If you want to have a family session, then you will have to be the one to get them to make the decision to come."

"I know. I suppose I'm just tired of all they hypocrisy." Tori folded her arms and her body tensed for a second before relaxing. "I mean hell, my Dad doesn't even _deserve_ to be a police chief. We go to church every week and listen to the sermon, but my family is just-" Tori hesitated and moved her hand up to her throat. "Can I get a drink?"

"There's a water fountain right outside."

"Thank you." Tori got up and left to get a drink, so Sam used this time to write down notes and try to analyze. She turned to the computer screen and opened up _childwelfare _dot gov, one of the sites that she was using in her research.

"The issues seem deeper than I originally thought." Sam chewed on the tip of her pen and furrowed her brow while reading the site. At first she was certain the family problems stemmed from the marital issues, but now the implied source was giving her an entirely new image.

Scrolling down she read the possible treatment for the topic. _Group Therapy, Individual Treatment, Dyadic, Family, _and _Multiple Therapists._ Group therapy was the preferred treatment of choice, but some clients need individual treatment before they're ready for a support group. Individual is appropriate for victim, offender, parent as well as siblings and survivors. All parties involved need to be able to trust the therapist and come to believe change as possible and desirable.

Generally the triad between victim, offender, and parent have different levels of commitment to therapy.

Sam could see Dyadic as useful as it is used to repair damage to mother-child relationship, father-child, and husband-wife.

Family therapy, however, is a culmination of treatment and should typically not be taken until the reunification of the victim's best interest is in mind on all parties.

For this particular topic it was important to understand that multiple therapists may be needed, and can be helpful. These interventions were complex and rarely provided by one individual, and if possible, two therapists should be involved, though many are usually involved if each family member participates.

Families in this issue tend to be crisis-ridden, making it very difficult for one person to have total responsibility. Assigning a different therapist can often recreate the boundary in a family that was crossed.

"If all of this is the case, I may need help to deal with this." She turned around slowly and looked up at the door. Tori walked in with a paper cup and smiled politely at her.

"Alice is nice, she gave me a cup for the water-is she your boss?"

"Yeah, my boss and mentor." Sam crossed her legs once more and folded her hands onto her lap. "She gave me the opportunity I have here. I only hope to be as good of a counselor as she is one day." Tori sipped her water at a slow pace and carefully sat on the couch.

"You have a lot of respect for her, then. That's a great thing. I think Jade mentioned she was seeking therapy here-probably from Alice." Tori moved her hand up to her hair and closed her eyes. "I'm sorry about earlier, getting a bit teary eyed and whatever."

"That's perfectly fine, Tori. I'm here to talk, and if you need to cry, it's fine. It's a good thing to cry, it lets out what you're holding in." Tori's lips moved up and she nodded once.

"It's just that I've talked a lot about my family to my friends, and while they think I've told them _everything_, there are so many things they don't know. Things they'll never know because I don't want them knowing." Sam tapped her pen on her leg and furrowed her brow, nodding as Tori took another drink. "I feel partially responsible for the way my dad was. I don't know why, I've blacked out a lot of my childhood. I'm angry at Dad, and I should blame him but I feel like-I don't know…"

Tori moved her hand to her left temple and closed her eyes. "He was the authority, he was a respected police officer. He had to know what he was doing, right?" Sam took a deep breath and pressed her lips together as Tori's eyelids opened partway. "I don't understand, I've forgotten a lot but it feels like I'm remembering things-things I don't want to remember regarding my sister and myself."

"Sounds like selective memory, or more appropriate is you've blacked out whatever childhood trauma you may have endured. Recent events very well could have triggered such things-maybe seeing your sister out on the streets or your father's drinking habits." Tori's eyebrows curled in the middle and her folded hands pushed forward on her pants. "If you suffered trauma from him when he was drunk, then that very well could be a trigger."

"I see."

"Now, what you went through as a child. I do have a couple questions." Tori straightened her back and tensed, as though bracing herself. "First, what your father may have done, when was the last time it occurred? I understand if it's too difficult to remember-"

"The last time was when Trina was thirteen. Mom finally got a little backbone and threatened to leave him, so he stopped drinking. He hasn't done anything since then, and what he did was done to both of us." Tori raised an eyebrow and frowned. "Does it matter? You think it could have made Trina go in the way she did?"

"It is…possible." Sam curled a finger over her upper lip and she closed her eyes, breathing in carefully. "As you are aware, I'm still new at this, so if we pursue, I would like to have future sessions with you done with my mentor as well." Tori rolled her head to the right and slowly nodded.

"Will it help?"

"It can be very helpful, especially in this instance." Sam leaned forward and uncrossed her legs, then clasped her hands between her knees. "You need to understand that what happened during childhood was neither your fault or the fault of your sister."

"I…can't be sure." Tori threw her empty paper cup into the trashcan and took a deep breath. "Mom never did anything, you know. She sat there for years, just…fucking numb. Dad came home angry when he was drunk, the only thing that seemed to make him not attack us with his fists-" Tori moved her hand over her eyes and her body started to tremble. Sam felt her stomach tighten as a flash of sorrow and anger ran through her. After several long seconds, Tori pulled her hand away and parted her lips, speaking with a scratchiness in her throat. "If it helps, then I'd like to have Alice here too in future sessions."

"Okay, I'll let her know."

"I don't want my family to be split apart. I don't know what I want anymore, to be honest. I want everyone to be happy, I want the yelling and fighting to stop, I want Trina to be safe and not…out there."

"I want you to know that I, Alice, any counselor here will do all that they can." Tori smiled and swept her fingers across her eyelids. "Understand, however, that recovery is a slow process that can take years. We may have to work with your family members in the long run, but a full family session will be difficult unless everyone wants to better the situation. Individual counseling may be needed for each family member before family counseling…"

"I understand. I can try to talk to them. Dad's always the hardest on counseling because he doesn't want society to see someone of his status going for counseling. His family being counseled is also an issue." Tori scoffed and turned her eyes away, narrowing them. "No matter how fucked up we all are, he doesn't want the public to see him as a bad person or start making assumptions about him and his family. Even if they're accurate."

Tori looked back slowly and her eyebrows pushed up on her forehead. "The reason I sought out therapy, by the way, is so I would have someone I _can_ talk to about this. I needed someone who could listen to my problems, someone confidential that isn't, you know, my friends."

"A counselor is usually the best bet there. Healthier too, because we'll usually try to offer the least biased position. A counselor's job isn't to judge or accuse, where friends may do exactly that."

Tori rolled her eyes and hugged her stomach. "Yeah, I know that much is true. I feel stupid for it too, it's my fault I couldn't keep my fucking mouth shut." Sam frowned as Tori's head bowed and her shoulders fell.

"You needed someone to talk to. It is not your fault at all." Tori leaned back slowly and looked into Sam's eyes. In her own gaze there was a deepness to the pain the girl was in, but a hint of relief as well. "You're not to blame, neither is your sister. I would recommend not telling your friends more personal details about your lives, that's what we're here for. Okay?"

"Okay." Tori took another deep breath and looked up at the clock. "I don't know how I'd get my dad to even agree to counseling. Mom and Trina, maybe…if they can do it under his nose."

Sam liked this idea because there was power in numbers. If Tori, Trina, and Holly each got individual counseling for a while, they could very well convince David himself to get help for his own problems. Then continuing the process for recovery, if each wanted to try and salvage any portion of relationships and each agreed it was beneficial, they could certainly do family counseling.

"Tori, I'd like you to also remember this-especially about your father." Tori pulled her purse strap onto her shoulder and crinkled her nose. "I know that will be difficult to do, but remember that everyone is human. Most often there is a psychiatric, mental disorder involved that was formed at some point of time in that person's own life. The things your father may have done in the past that contributed to any abuse, his own drunkenness, likely has a root connecting to his past."

"Really? Because Trina and I always refer to him as a monster."

She paused for a moment and circled her hand in the air. "Let me clarify though. That does not condone or validate the things he's done." Tori nodded and cleared her throat. "Your father may have a deep mental reason contributing to the things that he has done, and in order to treat that, we have to get him to acknowledge that what he did he had no right to do."

"Yeah." Tori rose up from the couch and sighed heavily. "I suppose you're right though. Maybe there is something in his history too that made him the way he is. I don't feel like asking though, he's a hard person to talk to. Especially since he started putting all of his time and energy into his work."

"When did that begin?"

"When I was eleven and my sister was thirteen. That's around the time he stopped drinking and became a workaholic. That's also around the time mom became reclusive, almost invisible…she didn't start having her affair until I was fifteen, though."

"Do you suppose your mother would be willing to come in?" She knew Alice would be the best bet for Holly. One of the male counselors on staff would be able to counsel David, assuming he ever came in. Nixon was their most seasoned male counselor, so she could see Alice assigning David to him.

"Probably, but she's like Trina, doesn't think there's much need for any help. I can talk to her and I can talk to Trina, but I guess it's still like you say…they'll seek help if they really want it." Tori closed her eyes and slowly shook her head. "Trina would probably be easiest for me to convince, but even then…who knows."

"Give it time. We'll be here." Tori looked past her and at the computer screen. Her lips pursed and Sam turned over her shoulder.

"Do you think my family's going to really need multiple therapists?"

"Most likely for individual counseling. It depends also on the client's level of comfort. As well as the counselor's, I suppose." Sam moved her hand up to her chest and leaned back. "I would probably be unable to counsel your father, for example. I'd recommend him to Nixon, who is the most experienced male counselor on staff here. Sometimes having two counselors work together, a male and female in your sister's case may help to show the client a mutual relationship of sorts that works between opposite genders."

"I see." Tori chuckled once and crossed her arms. "If you're so new at this, how do you know so much?"

"Alice teaches me a lot and has me constantly researching various methods, disorders, traumas, and so on."

"Ah. Yeah, she definitely sounds like a good teacher."

"The best." Sam smiled and stood up. "So, I believe our time is up for today. I can schedule you in for another appointment whenever you'd like. Normally, Alice suggests once or twice a week per client, but that can also depend on the client themselves."

"Okay. I'd like to have another session soon. This was helpful, I'm glad to get it off my chest. Thanks for listening."

"Any time, Tori." Sam gave her a smile, then turned to her computer to open the scheduler. "Let's see what spaces I've got available…"

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><p>I am going to have to make a few adjustments in regards to future chapters. My cousin-who is a licensed counselor-informed me of certain regulations, safety precautions as well as ethics that a counselor needs to be aware of, in which Sam is already at risk of being in violation of.<p> 


	19. Cat's Concern

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 19 (Cat's Concern)<p>

Returning home that evening, she found Cat working tirelessly on dinner. The girl's usually neat hair was poorly groomed, and her clothes looked to be sloppily put on. "Are you alright?" Sam raised an eyebrow and Cat looked up from the crockpot.

"I'm fine, just have a lot on my mind. Good to see you home." Sam lowered her purse onto the couch and walked over to the counter, sniffing the air and delighting in the scent of beef stew. "I was talking to Trina on the phone a while ago." She folded her arms on the countertop and watched as Cat moved from the stew over to the pot of rice on the stove.

"It's good that you're trying to be friends with her, Cat. She needs a friend like you."

"I know. That's just why-" Cat paused and looked up from the rice, groaning softly. Sam moved her eyebrows inwards as Cat looked over her shoulder. "Can I be honest? I'm stressing out. I think I might even be getting a stress rash on my back." Sam walked around the counter and carefully lifted Cat's shirt up, wincing at the red rash on the girl's lower back. "Is it bad?"

"Well, I might suggest skin cream at least. Wouldn't recommend scratching either." Sam glanced at the rice an hummed softly, it seemed that the girl just started cooking. "If you'd like, I can take over and you can get some rest."

"No, cooking relaxes me." Cat turned around and leaned back against the counter. Her chest expanded and she held onto her breath for a period of time before releasing it. "Ever since Trina told me what she was involved in, I've been stressing out. I mean, I'm trying to be okay with it and I know she needs a friend."

"Ah." She understood now, with the way Cat was, it was already hard for her to accept something like prostitution. Sam clasped the edge of the counter across from Cat and leaned back against it. Her brow furrowed as Cat's gaze dropped. "So, what do you think you should do?"

"I want to be her friend. I don't want her to think I'm judging her and drop her, but I don't like talking about prostitution. It makes me feel…I don't know, uncomfortable?" Cat lifted her gaze back up and pressed her lips together.

"Being friends with someone in that lifestyle can be difficult, Cat."

"I know you've explained it, I know she's explained it, but I still can't understand why someone would…do that." Cat looked down at her thighs and made a shuddering sound. "Can I also tell you something? Between the two of us?"

"You can tell me anything you like."

Cat inhaled slowly and turned to face the rice. "I uh…I've never had sex. I'm terrified of it, to be honest."

"Why?"

"I think it's gross." Sam lifted her eyebrows and leaned slightly to the left. There was nothing wrong with this mindset. She didn't know enough of Cat's condition to say whether it was something she'd grow out of or something she may need therapy for in years to come. "I can't stand the thought of someone's…you know, anything foreign going inside of me. Then the bodily fluids that-" Cat gagged into her forearm and turned away from the rice.

"I think I understand."

"It's the reason I've always been hesitant to date, because I feel like it leads to sex, and I don't want that. I've grown up with my parents always telling me these horror stories about it."

"Such as?"

"They would tell me things like the stuff that comes out of the guy is mixed with piss…" Sam cringed and quickly shook her head. Cat's shoulders fell and her lips formed an oval. "I mean, I'm sure it's not, but-"

"It isn't. For that you'd have to understand medical anatomy. In the reproductive system there are glands that swell up and close off the urinary tract when a man is about to ejaculate." Cat's scrunched her nose and a line appeared on her forehead. "So as the seminal fluids build up, that is what is released. There is absolutely no urine coming out."

"Okay. Let's not talk that. But yeah, thanks for clearing that up…" Cat folded her arms across her chest and sighed heavily. "The point is, I can't understand sex, so I can't understand why someone would be a prostitute. Or…a porn star…"

"You don't have to understand, just be a friend. It's okay to be uncomfortable with the idea of sex. If talking about it makes you uncomfortable, you don't need to discuss it."

"I don't want to just say it and make Trina think it's not important…Though she only brought it up because I asked about it. So, it is kind of my fault." Cat shrugged and moved her hand up to her forehead. "You know what? Forget it, I just won't talk about it. I'll try to deal with it because I want to at least be a friend to Trina, but I wish she would consider something other than prostitution. Something healthier."

"I know. Give it time, maybe she'll decide it's not for her." Sam took the wooden spoon and started to stir the stew. Cat's shoulders fell and her lips moved back into her cheeks. "To be honest, I guess you could say that's how it went for me."

"I want to help her, I just don't know how."

"You're helping her most by simply being a friend and not judging her." Cat smiled gently and Sam looked over her shoulder, studying the girl. "By doing so, you also give her the confidence she needs to make new friends. To be sociable and talk to others, and build up her trust levels. It's hoped by being friends with anybody, it helps self-esteem."

"I guess so."

Sam lifted the spoon from the stew and tasted of it. It was flavorful and cooked well, so she turned the burner down. "Of course, Cat. One thing you can do is not blame yourself _or_ your friends for her lifestyle."

"But I-"

"It was a lifestyle choice she made herself. You can't be sure that you or your friends had any influence on that decision." She pat her hands together and turned towards her friend. "Likely, you had very little to do with it."

It was also possible that the actions she dealt with in childhood misconstrued what sex was actually about. To that degree, she may feel that nothing is wrong with a man or another woman mistreating her, and the things done to prostitutes or porn stars were normal.

What Trina initially said as the reason she went into prostitution was likely not the truth, but a distraction from the girl. She claimed to have had sex once with Jason at the camp, and if she was anything like her sister who had disassociated herself from the actions in childhood, then having sex could have caused her to recall her own past.

"So then, it's that simple?" Cat tilted her head and lowered her arms to her sides. "Just be her friend without judging?" Sam chuckled dryly and moved her hands to her hips.

"It's pretty much all and the best thing you can do for her, like I said. Men and women involved in prostitution or pornography typically have low self-esteem, and the friends they have tend to be in that same social circle. Once they become accustomed to that, it's the only life they know. Having a friend that isn't involved in that lifestyle, associating with them and doing things with them can very well be the ladder they need to climb out of a very dark place. Obviously it's not easy because you _want_ to judge, to be biased, but as a good friend you've got to know when to speak your mind and when not to."

"Yeah, I'm not very assertive. I think you know that." Cat turned off the burner beneath the rice and grabbed a couple plates from the pantry. "I think, though, that I see what you mean. Despite how crude Beck, Jade, Robbie, and Andre all are, maybe they've been good for Tori? She seems to have some amount of self-esteem despite the stories she comes up with."

Sam crossed her arms and watched as Cat spooned the rice onto the bowl. She tapped her foot on the ground and closed her eyes. "Well certainly they've helped keep her from having too low of a self-esteem. It sounds like they've kept her busy enough." Sometimes however, just ignoring a problem allowed it to fester until it exploded into chaos. Sam's concern regarding Tori was that she was using her friends as a tool to avoid addressing her own issues at home. "Maybe it'd be a good idea for you to be friendly with Tori as well."

"Trina's one thing, Sam…" Cat spooned the stew over the rice and started to frown. "I _want_ to be Trina's friend, to help her through this prostitution stuff. As difficult as it is, but Tori? I don't even know if she really has any problems, she's always just talking about her family's issues, and never her own."

"Who knows, maybe it's a cry for help? Or it could be she has nobody else to talk to." Sam reached for her coffee mug beside the sink then moved over to the coffeemaker. This was one of the rare occasions she felt like she needed to have coffee at dinnertime rather than just the mornings. "I'm not saying to be friends with the others if you don't want to, and you certainly don't have to be friends with someone you don't want to be, but I think it's a good idea to try. Who knows what benefit you could make on a person's life, Cat."

Sam moved the coffee to her lips while Cat took the plates to the table. "Do you think I am judging Tori too harshly as well?"

"What do I think? Well…" She took a deep breath and walked over to the table. It was difficult to really say anything without giving much away, but judging off what Cat was saying, Tori's friends were likely to be well aware of family troubles. "If Tori's always talking about her family problems, then it's probable she and her sister are in two very similar boats and need good friends. That isn't to say the friends she has now aren't good friends, but she may benefit from your friendship as well.

"Maybe so. I think I just need to think about stuff." They sat at the table and Sam handed out the silverware. Cat straightened the tablecloth and looked towards her food, sighing heavily. "I'm worried about them though, Tori and her sister. I don't know the whole story, but just the things I've heard them talk about makes me genuinely concerned for them."

"Good, that means you'll do your best to be a good friend and not just a friend out of pity." Sam mixed her rice and stew with her fork, then turned her gaze to Cat. "You don't need the whole story in order to be a supportive friend."

"I guess not."

"Now, let's eat supper and get some rest." Cat smiled and picked up her fork. Sam hoped Cat would be a good friend, to both girls, because that would give them another source to fall back on. She may not think she can do much for them, but a single supportive friend could create a ripple effect in someone's life like that of a single raindrop in a lake.

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><p>Indeed a ripple, and a ripple in a stream can lead to a wave in a lake.<p> 


	20. Ethics and Arrangements

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: So my cousin gave me some good information. I'm going to have to alter the course of the story, but only a tad. Good news, there _can _be situations where multiple therapists may have to work with a client. Bad news, there are various ethical things that must be paid attention to.

* * *

><p>Chapter 20 (Ethics and Arrangements)<p>

"Here's what we have," Sam said as she sat down with Alice. With her client's agreement, she was able to share Tori's file with her boss. "I've explained the ethical issues regarding her wishes for me to counsel her family members, due to the confidentiality risks and whatnot. Now I understand that it's okay if we work jointly, but I'm not sure that a joint session would be recommendable at this point-unless it's with her sister."

Alice curled a finger under her chin and took the folder from Sam. "Why?" Alice was aware at this point that Tori wanted Sam to counsel her parents as well, but unless she could get Alice and the other counselors to assist, she couldn't ethically do so without possible risk.

"I have reason to believe the issue that Tori suffers with, as well as she says her sister, is primarily rooted with the girls' father." Alice hummed and lowered her shoulders. Sam watched as the woman opened the folder and studied her notes with great intensity.

"This is Chief Vega's daughter?" Sam's lips pressed together and she responded with a firm nod. "If your theory you have is correct, then it would be wise to be careful." Alice shifted through the notes. As she moved each paper away, her frown deepened. "Based on your notes and observations of Miss Vega's behavior, it seems accurate. She has given permission for assistance?"

"Yes."

"Then I need to see for myself. I would like to sit in on your next session with her. Also, I can discuss with her the possibility of other counselors here helping her relatives, if her relatives choose to seek therapy."

"I'd like to try and help keep this family together if possible, but I know that they need to want help first."

"Absolutely right." Alice leaned back and folded her arms across her chest. Sam shifted to the right, shying away from Alice's stern expression. "Still, it may not be possible to repair the relationship with the father if your theory is accurate. The mother possibly, if we can help to repair that connection, it will be good. I would hate to see an entire family broken apart because of…" Alice glanced at the paperwork one last time and exhaled softly. "This childhood trauma."

Remembering something Tori had brought up, as well as what happened when she visited with the girls the night their father had been drunk, she had to ask if Alice saw anything to David's behavior. "Mr. Vega seems to avoid going home when drunk, do you make anything of that?"

"I do not know enough to assume anything about that behavior." Alice returned the papers to the folder and closed her eyes. "It could be a sign of guilt or remorse. Regardless, if your client wishes to repair the ties with her family, including her father, he's going to have to want to help. However, if he's truly the causation, then he'd have to be able to acknowledge that he has or had an issue and want help from that. Sometimes a person in that situation will be adamant about refusing any sort of help."

She took the folder back from Alice and furrowed her brow. It concerned her that both of the Vega sisters were on destructive paths. Though, different levels. Tori's avoidance of her problems by way of ignoring them and seeking attention from fans as a distraction could be just as destructive as the path Trina. Primarily because ignoring the issue did not make it go away

"I hope you gave Tori some suggestions on external help she can find. Like a women's shelter, low rent housing, and other healthy ways of getting out of that environment."

"I did." She wanted to offer the same for Trina, and right now it seemed she was in the most need of help. However, the best way to help Trina was to help all of them, and Tori was a start. Due to the ethical issues related to confidentiality, if Trina sought help, she'd either have to suggest a joint session with Tori or refer her to one of the other counselors. "The next session we have scheduled is in the next week. I can contact her and let her know you want to sit in and may want to ask her a few things."

"Please do. If this does escalate into a family unit, then we may need to have the other counselors work on this as well." Sam gave her a smile and stood up, thanking her for her time. There was no way she could do this alone.

Arriving home, Sam was surprised to find the door locked and the lights off. She entered the house and set her purse down on the kitchen counter while scanning the area. "Maybe Cat went to bed early."

She opened the refrigerator and grabbed a bottle of water, doing her best to be quiet so as not to wake the girl if she indeed was in bed. When she turned around, she heard a noise that startled her. Throwing her hand up to her chest, she looked to the couch and saw someone sleeping under a blanket.

Her heart shot up and her muscles tensed as the man rose up and pulled the blanket from his face. When she saw it was only Goomer, she relaxed and withdrew her hand. "Goomer, what the hell are you doing in the apartment?" Goomer blinked twice and looked up at her with a subtle smile.

"Cat told me to wait and tell you she was going out with her friend." Sam furrowed her brow and waited as he scrunched his nose and grew concerned. "Did I scare you? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to!"

"No, no it's okay." She set her bottle of water down and pulled her phone from the purse nearby. "Why don't you go on and go home, I'll give Cat a call." She didn't know what friend Cat would be out with, but regardless, she would have preferred the girl send her a text or call her up and leave a voice message rather than let someone stay unattended at the apartment.

She couldn't count the many times it happened back in her days in the industry where she'd walk into a place and found someone waiting for her to shoot some video. It wasn't at all glamorous like many thought, the woman rarely got a chance to rest. If the man wanted to shoot, then the shoot would happen no matter what.

Shaking her head, Sam dialed Cat's number and put the phone to her ear. Still riddled with post-traumatic stress, she wasn't at all comfortable with Goomer in the moment. She wasn't angry, since he didn't know or intend anything bad, but she did need to explain to Cat why this was a problem.

"Sam," Cat answered immediately after three rings, "You're home now?" She kept her eyes locked on Goomer, narrowing them and pulling her lips back into a thin frown. The man clasped his hands together between his knees and bowed his head, looking like a scolded child.

"Yes. You want to explain why our dear friend Goomer was asleep on the couch in an empty house?" The girl let out a sigh, which wasn't a huge comfort for Sam.

"I'm sorry about that, it was an emergency. He was already visiting, saying he needed to pick something up for Dice. Trina called me up and needed someone to talk to, so I was in a hurry. I told Goomer to just wait for you and get what he needed then."

"Okay." She pulled the phone from her ear and motioned to Goomer. He lifted his head up and smiled sadly. "Goomer what is it Dice needed?"

"Oh I know that!" He replied enthusiastically. "Cat made some cupcakes for his cousin's birthday party, so he wanted me to pick those up for him." She raised an eyebrow and returned to the refrigerator. On the bottom shelf were two Tupperware containers holding several chocolate cupcakes.

"Found them." She grabbed the containers and handed them to Goomer, saying her parting words while he thanked her and hurried out the door. Finally alone, she returned her attention to the phone conversation. "Cat. For future reference, I would prefer not being surprised like that. Just call me or text me, okay?"

"I'm sorry Sam, I didn't think it was going to be an issue at the time."

"It's alright." She sat on the couch and closed her eyes. Her thoughts were now on Trina an what she needed from Cat. It was good that Cat was being there for the girl. "How is Trina?"

"She's better now. She and Tori got into an argument over whether or not she should seek therapy. Trina doesn't want to do that because she doesn't want anyone to think there's something wrong with her."

"Understandable." It was a common fear and misconception that kept people from seeking help when they needed it most. For Trina's case, Sam wasn't too surprised to see the girl in that mindset.

"She's also thinking about Jason, but is still too terrified to see him. I told her to just take it a step at a time and see him when she's ready."

"Great, that's the best advice you can give her right now." It was amazing to see Cat taking a greater role in this friendship, especially since she would likely need to fill that role more than Sam could do at this point. She wanted to be Trina's friend, but that would mean she couldn't be Trina's therapist.

Still, there were times a friendship could help jumpstart the road to recovery more so than a counselor. Though both were needed for Trina _and_ her sister, as the wounds were deep from what Sam could see.

"Sam? I need to go. Trina's still upset about stuff, so I'm taking her for dinner."

"Okay. I'll talk with you in a while."

"Bye."

After talking with Cat, she lounged around the living room for a bit before opening Skype to find Derek online. He'd been on for a few minutes, waiting to catch her before having to get off. "So, you wanted to talk about something?"

"Yes. I'm able to come back to the states in a couple of months." Her heart skipped a beat and a smile grew on her face in an instant. Derek gazed at her lovingly and breathed out a soft exhale. "I was thinking, maybe renting a place on base there in Los Angeles."

She furrowed her brow and looked over to the kitchen. This would mean she'd have to be the one to start looking for a place. She wanted him to have a home to come home to, but she hadn't anticipated moving out of this apartment. "So, I'll have to move before then? When exactly are you able to come back?" She hoped for it to be sooner rather than later.

"June." His smile swept away and his forehead folded. "Is something wrong?"

"No, I'm happy you're able to come back. I just, that's three months to find a place and to help Cat find a roommate." In hindsight it seemed difficult, but as she thought more on it, she remembered Alice's words to her. Maybe they could talk Trina or Tori into moving in with Cat, a much healthier environment than the one they were living in. "I can work something out."

"I love you."

Her cheekbones rose up and her eyes began to glow as she gazed back at him. "Love you too." Even now she was picturing being in his arms again, feeling his warmth. "I've missed you, more than you know. I don't like being alone, you know."

"I know. It won't be much longer, I promise that." For as much as she didn't like to be alone, she was nervous about finding a place and staying there until Derek came back. She'd find a way to work through it, though. He was always worth it to her.

* * *

><p>Still on active duty, but it's good he'll be able to be there. In the meantime, things are building up.<p> 


	21. The Ace in the Hand

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: This chapter is to be done in Cat's perspective, since for ethical reasons I cannot have Sam be here.

* * *

><p>Chapter 21 (The Ace in the Hand)<p>

"So your roommate has to move?" Beck asked from across the poker table. Cat put her cards face down on the table to fold. Her eyes turned up to him and her nose crinkled for a second.

"Yep." She didn't want Sam to move, but she was not going to say no when it involved her fiancé. "Her fiancé's coming back in a few months. I don't know how long it'll be before he has to be called over since he's active duty, but for now he's back and they need a place."

"You'll need a roommate then, won't you? Or will your grandma be moving back in?"

She let out a dry chuckle and shook her head. "Nona will never leave that retirement home." Sam did bring up a suggestion that she was now thinking about, but unsure if she could manage to do it. "I'll have to find a roommate. Maybe another girl who'll help with the babysitting. Sam's job as a counselor is becoming top priority these days, so she can't babysit."

"I can understand that," Tori replied. "It's good to have you over playing poker with us, Cat. I was afraid you wanted nothing more to do with us." A look of sorrow washed over Tori, causing a brief pang of guilt in her.

"It isn't like that at all." She spoke the truth when she told Sam she would be friends with both Vega sisters. She didn't know why Sam was adamant, but there were things that Cat could see which led her to believe both girls needed a genuine friend. "What kind of friend would I be if I avoided you?"

Tori's lips curved up and her eyebrows meshed together. "A bad one?" Cat laughed once and shrugged.

"I've always believed it's better to avoid nothing in life. Whatever it may be-friends, family, troubles…" Tori's jaw tightened and her eyes darted to her father's study. The girl's chest stopped moving and for a second her body seemed to tense.

Cat moved her hand over to Tori's wrist, hoping to comfort her. The girl's eyes meshed with hers and in an instant she flashed a smile. Though there was no joy in Tori's eyes, a sign of a fake expression.

"Looks like Robbie wins the hand," Tori remarked, "Who deals next?"

"I do," Jade said grabbing the cards. After Jade dealt, Cat picked her two up and marveled over the Ace in her hand.

_"I'm the ace. I don't know what Sam means by that, but…"_ She glanced to the others and furrowed her brow. Believing what Sam so often said about not blaming the friends for the circumstances of either Vega, she couldn't help but to doubt they weren't at least somewhat influential.

Her own bitterness towards them was something she needed to get over. To her, they were nothing but liars and false friends. People who could lead one or both girls further down some dark and destructive path.

_"Instead of focusing on your bitterness,"_ Sam's voice came to mind, startling her._ "Be friends with all of them. Be the ace in that group. They can be good friends for the girls as well, but need to be given the chance and opportunity to do that. They'll only do so by seeing what good friends do for one another. You can show them they don't have to lie to the parents, or insult their friends' relatives in order to be friends with someone. Be the ace that leads them out of the mindset that they need to be a certain way. Bear in mind they are human too, each with their own share of troubles that may affect how they act."_

One should never blame somebody for being human. If indeed they had difficulties that affected their behavior, then her turning them away could still affect their overall esteem and sense of self-worth.

"No Vega," Jade smirked, "It's not you she hates. It's us." Cat winced as the words pierced her like that of a hot knife to the heart. "She's even hanging around that sister of yours now." Cat leaned back slowly, raising an eyebrow as she studied Jade.

"You know about that?"

"Beck and I saw you at that restaurant last night." Jade clicked her tongue and tapped her hand on the table. "I check." With that, Beck pushed two black chips forward. Jade rolled her eyes and Beck only grinned. "Well regardless, if you're hanging around _that _chick…"

Cat swept her hair over her shoulder and hummed gently. Normally she'd ignore this, but she didn't think there was a need to do so anymore. "What is meant by 'that chick'."

"You know," Andre laughed, "She's insane. Not to mention needy." Her eyes drifted to the right, where Tori was sinking down in her seat. The girl kept her eyes focused intensely on the cards in her hands, but her body was starting to shake. It was a barely noticeable tremble, but to Cat, it was an earthquake.

"You're holding something in," She whispered, "Let it out." Tori's head shot up and her eyes widened as her friends started to turn. "You've got something to say. Say it." For the first time, she felt truly empowered. "You're just going to let them put your sister down like that?"

In the corner of her eyes, she saw Trina on the stairs. The girl was watching on, her face tense and her eyes narrow. Where this sense of strength was coming from, she didn't know. Never had the thought crossed her mind that she should speak up, but that was before when she cared about the judgments that came from these people.

Now she didn't care what they thought of her. "I don't speak my mind, Tori, and look what happens. Don't hold something inside until it makes you bitter and regretful over something you wished you could have said."

"I just don't want conflict," Tori whispered back, "I don't want people…I don't want bad things to happen."

"Speak your mind, and bad things may not happen. Holding something inside will still cause pain. Worse than letting it out. Maybe holding something in causes more pain to other people than it would if you said something."

"What are you two mumbling about over there?" Jade spoke up with a sharper tone. "Tori, it's your move. Call, check, fold, whatever you're going to do-do it."

"I-" Tori caught her breath and looked to her friends with misty eyes. Her voice cracked and she slowly shook her head. "My sister is not insane. She's not a quack, or a nutjob. She's none of those things. You guys shouldn't talk about her like that. She's normal, we're normal…"

"Yeah whatever, picture perfect." Jade scoffed and Cat shot a glare at the girl. "You two get everything handed to you on a fucking platter. You were born with silver spoons in your mouth because daddy's the top notch police officer on the force."

"We were not!" Tori's voice rose and her skin began to turn red. "You don't know anything about us Jade. You don't know anything about our lives, about our father or our mother-"

"No? Thanks to _you_ we know your dad's a drunk, your mom's a whore, and your sister is-I don't know, she's got some sort of problem too I'm sure. And you're perfect."

"I am not!"

A lump formed in Cat's throat and she looked away, suddenly wishing she hadn't said anything. However, that would have gone against what she wanted to encourage Tori to do.

"No? Then explain why it is you simply must have every lead part in every school play." Jade threw her cards down and Tori leaned back, letting out one silent whimper. "You fight to sing every song the school's choir people want to do. You have to have the spotlight, as if you feed off the audience that listens to you! You're obsessed with glory, what makes you so damn perfect and spotless? Tell me! I want that life!"

"You don't want my life." Tori's voice shifted suddenly. The low tone caused Cat to jump in surprise. She watched Tori's hands clench and her eyes closed. Her voice wavered and her nostrils spread out. "If you think for a minute that my sister and I had it easy, then you're a fool. Every one of you."

"Oh." Jade laughed wildly and moved her hand to her chest. "I'm the fool? Well excuse me little miss princess-"

"She's right." Cat didn't care who she interrupted, even Jade herself. The girl stopped and shot a wide-eyed look at her. Tori glanced at her with confusion while Trina, who had started to go back upstairs, stopped on the top step to peer down at the group. "And I think you know it, Jade."

"What are you talking about, Cat? Just keep quiet and let this work itself out."

"No, I've been silent around you long enough." Jade crossed her arms and rolled her head to the right. "You walk all over the Vegas, every one of you does. None of you are better than them, and they're not claiming to be better than you. They just want friends, just like you do."

"Haven't we been their friend?"

"You've been Tori's, but in a way you haven't been." The girl's jaw dropped and she pulled back with an astonished laugh.

"How have we not been?"

"By freely insulting her family, lying to them-and to her." She leaned forward and motioned to Beck. "How long did you go before you finally told Tori what you and the guys did to Trina? How long did you go before confiding in her that you lied to Mr. Vega that night and made Trina look like a fool in front of her own father?"

Beck grunted and shrugged. "If he was any bit of a father, he wouldn't have believed us over his daughter."

"So what? That doesn't excuse what _you_ did. He could be the worst father on the face of the planet-" Cat paused when she heard a chortle from Tori. Suspicious, she wanted to inquire about it, but that would have to wait. "But you choosing to demean and belittle her sister, and then lie to her dad, which is about the worst thing a friend can do…what do you think that says about you? Should you be proud of yourself? Should I be proud to call you a friend? I wouldn't want to let you around my family!"

Beck sputtered while Andre and Robbie bowed their heads. A stern expression came over Jade, but she didn't say anything as Cat was not yet finished.

She inhaled slowly and kept her calm, knowing that if she spoke with anger in her voice, it would only cause them to get defensive. "I'm not saying any of you are bad friends to have, but some of your behavior is inexcusable. But Tori's right, like all of you, the Vegas have their own problems to deal with. You need friends to be there for support, and so do they. Maybe you should consider being more supportive and less hypocritical."

Jade huffed and spat out in defense. "What makes you think we have any issues?" To this, Cat deadpanned.

"Tori and I were both there when my roommate psychoanalyzed all of you." She looked at Tori with a hopeful smile as the girl made eye contact. "Sometimes, pretending there isn't a problem causes more pain than admitting it. We all need a friend, someone to talk to who will be supportive and let us open up without fear of being judged."

Tori wiped her eyes and glanced at the stairs. She took a deep breath and looked down to the cards now bent in her hands. Cat looked back to Jade and spoke with a slow, calm voice. "Sometimes if the friends you have are judgmental and pushy, you're afraid to talk to them. Afraid they won't be supportive, but rather judgmental. So you hide until you can't take it anymore, until you explode and resent those very people you called friends."

Robbie reached over, tapping Cat on the shoulder. She turned her eyes to him and studied the distressed look on his face. "Are you saying you resent us?" Shaking her head she looked away from him and towards Tori.

"No. I don't. I feel sorry for you." The friends followed her look and each of them sank a bit in their chairs. When her eyes flicked up to the stairs, they followed and froze on Trina's hardened expression. "I know you guys can be supportive, and I know you guys care, and I wish you would show that…You could be great friends, more than just the people that Tori hangs out with and plays poker with. You know, neither of them can say they have a 'best friend'."

"What?" Andre snapped his eyes over and looked at Tori in astonishment. "But we-"

"I never called any of you my best friend," Tori whispered. "You share things with a best friend. You can talk to them on the same level. I know that before we accuse you of always being judgmental, that I've also been stupid by always being critical about my relatives to you. Something that was wrong on my part." Tori's voice cracked once more and her eyes clenched. "I just…wanted someone to take notice…That was all. You never did."

Tori stood up and wiped her nose. She hurried to the stairs, ignoring their protests. They looked at Cat, each of them appearing to search for answers. She shrugged and set the cards down.

"Don't look at me. Every time she said something about her family, what did you guys do? You laughed and went on to say something demeaning about them. I guess it's not your fault, because you didn't know…"

"She never acted like she liked them or anything," Jade muttered.

"Tori loves her family, and she and Trina both told me that their sister is the one they're closest to. They feel like they have to be that way." Cat stood up from the table and shrugged. "I don't know what problems you guys have to deal with in your lives, and I'm not going to attempt demean whatever you've got going on, but if you let those issues get in the way of you being a good friend to somebody-then those problems won't be the only problems you have in the future."

"We never meant to make it seem that she couldn't talk to us."

"Jade, you're always pushy and aggressive. You act before you think. Insult before you care."

"It's not my fault!" Jade put her hand to her chest and stood up with a swift and rising tone in her voice. "I know I get defensive, okay? I know I have problems! My family made me this way."

"Did you stop to think maybe Tori's and Trina's family made them the way they were?" Jade froze and Cat walked around the table. She put her hand to Jade's shoulder and spoke quietly, but loud enough for the whole table to hear. "I know you've got issues with your family. Each of you say you have family trouble somewhere. Even I do, so don't you think that would make you that much better of a friend for someone else that has family problems? Instead you let the walls you put around yourself push someone else with the same walls away. In the end, does it help or hurt? Do you think the other person is going to let down their walls or build them higher?"

"You've been hanging with Sam too much…" She rolled her eyes and cleared her throat.

"Jade, I'm serious."

"I know." The girl threw her arms out and walked towards the couch, groaning softly as she looked to the now empty stairs. "You're right. God, you're right." Jade muttered something about Cat being the last person she'd expect to be right about something like this. Cat chuckled once and sat with her on the couch.

"Look, if you or any of the others need someone to talk to. I'm here." It was the hardest decision to make, but yet, she wanted to. She wanted them to know that she was capable of listening, of being a friend to them.

"What you're saying about walls," Andre stood from the table and moved over. His eyes were still fixated on the stairs. "You think the things we've done, or how we acted, might make them think they can't talk to us?"

"Whatever the case Andre, their family is troubled. If they think they can't turn to a friend for support, then they'll stop thinking that outside people can be supportive. So if they have trust issues, guess what gets hit the hardest?"

"Damn, we never…"

"You guys are _not_ bad friends to have, but you can be great friends. You just have to be willing to try. That's all. It's not that hard to show someone you care."

"I think I might have fucked up badly," Robbie replied, "Probably to the point where I've screwed things up for everyone. I'm a lost cause." He bowed his head and Cat glanced over with concern.

"Why? What did you do?"

"I um, thought I was helping but-nevermind." He waved his hand in the air and looked away. "I think we should probably go up and talk to Tori. Apologize, let her know she can talk to us."

"Trina too."

"One thing at a time," Jade laughed.

"Okay, let me try this." Cat swept her hair over her shoulders and pressed her lips tight. Her eyebrows arched over her wide eyes and her voice grew stern. "Trina too." Jade flinched and the others nodded.

She felt proud of herself, she was never one to be assertive and pull it off. At the same time, she knew a chord must have been struck in the others because it shouldn't have worked. Or it could be what Sam told her, a little confidence could go a long way.

* * *

><p>Things are...building up at this point. When Robbie says he thinks he messed things up, pay attention. The first step of recovery may happen for everyone, but nothing will happen until the family does separate. That time is coming and it's inevitable, though it should probably be. Cat's newfound assertiveness will be helpful in getting Jade, Andre and Beck to really try and take more of an interest in being there for Tori as well as Trina. They'll never know the true issue (Cat will, but it'll be through a display of panicked emotions that she really learns anything). She may also help Holly gain a bit of courage to make a move she wishes she could have made a long time ago-but things are going to get bad first. Within the next few chapters. As you read on, I advise you to read with an open as well as mature mindset. The counseling of all the relatives will be taking place within the next ten chapters-and I do mean <em>all<em>, but not all together. That can't realistically happen yet.


	22. Deep Rooted Anxiety

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: A continuation of the last chapter and where one chapter got cut in two. This is where the build up we've seen starts to reach its high point.

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><p>Chapter 22 (Deep Rooted Anxiety)<p>

"We don't want to talk to you!" Trina's voice burst from behind the closed door the friends had gathered around. Cat stood behind them, listening as they pleaded to be given a chance to talk. "You've said enough, and you made my little sister cry."

"We're sorry," Jade pleaded, "Just give us a chance. Hear us out." Cat leaned against the wall and folded her arms. She hadn't been aware of how volatile the situation could get. It made her wonder just how deep were the things that everyone struggled with.

The tension in the air felt worse than that of her own home life before her parents abandoned her and ran off with her little brother. Then, the tension in the house here was something she'd always felt but never brought herself to question because it felt normal.

She struggled to think of everything that Tori spoke of, whether directly to her or as offhand comments to the friends. As long as they knew the Vega girls, their home life sounded like shit. She always attributed it to their father being an un-attentive workaholic.

Now that she thought about it, the one thing everyone had in common was avoidance. Avoidance and distraction. Trina's lifestyle, as something she couldn't comprehend, seemed to be distracting the girl from something. Tori's lust for attention through an audience seemed to be a distraction. Holly's behavior was avoidant in the sense that she was never home, but always out having some affair that Tori would talk about.

Then there was Mr. Vega, who seemed to be at the center of it all. Cat turned her eyes to the stairs and furrowed her brow. "Powerful, strong, and a man of authority." She turned to the stairs and walked towards them, stopping at the top step. "Avoids his daughters when he's drunk."

At least, that's what Tori would say in some of her offhand remarks about the man. "Why?" Tori would speak of her dad like he was a monster of some sort, but she never thought anything of it.

His family was falling apart and he wasn't doing anything to stop it. As many times as Cat saw Holly, the woman didn't seem to display what Sam called the 'battered wife syndrome'. There were never any signs that he'd been physically abusive to any of his family, but no one had taken the chance to notice if this was the case.

She turned to the others and frowned as they exchanged looks of dismay. "Give them some time. If they don't want to talk to you guys right now, then it's not going to happen."

"Yeah," Jade replied, "I guess you're right. We'll um…we'll be downstairs" Cat watched them depart and bowed her head. She struggled with what to say, and could think of nothing.

Trina's voice startled her and she turned to see the girl's head poking out of the bedroom. "Cat? Could you come in here?"

"Sure." She walked into the bedroom and Trina locked the door behind her. Tori was sitting on the bed with her back against the wall and arms wrapped around her legs. "I'm sorry about everything. I really am. I didn't know things were going to get out of hand."

"Well, I guess things were said that needed to be said. So it isn't all bad." Trina sighed heavily and sat down beside her sister. She pulled one arm around Tori's shoulders and smiled sorely as the girl put her head to Trina's shoulder. "Still, they don't know anything about us."

"They do want to try and be good friends for you guys."

"No offense, Cat, but the things we've dealt with aren't something that any of them are going to be capable of understanding."

"You don't think they'd understand abuse?" Trina flinched and Tori's muscles tensed. Startled by the reactions, Cat made her way to the edge of the bed and sat down. "At least one of them has dealt with abuse, and even I have dealt with abandonment."

"Not your standard abuse," Tori's voice broke out and shook with emotion. Her eyes clenched and she shook her head vigorously. Cat's heart stalled as she watched a flicker of pain in the sisters' eyes. "Sam says it's not normal, it wasn't normal. I blacked it out for so long, the things I saw and the things that happened when Trina and I were little."

"No abuse is."

"I-I don't want my family to be separated. They don't understand, we love our parents, our dad. He…loves us too." A lump formed in Cat's throat as she looked from Tori to Trina. A powerful emotion swept through her as her blood began to boil.

"I couldn't say it before," Trina whispered, "How painful my first time with Jason was. How hard it was, but then, it felt different." Trina took a deep breath and shook her head. "He said things that made me feel like what we shared was what was normal, what was real." The elder siblings' voice quivered with a distinguishable pain that made the acid in Cat's stomach seep into her esophagus. "That the emotion I felt with him, that I couldn't understand-that was 'love'. I still don't understand it, Cat. What I do? I spend so much time trying to recreate what Jason and I…what we had, but I can't. It feels…I can't say…"

Cat looked into their eyes and reached out to them, taking their hands in hers. There was an inexplicable sorrow in their eyes that drew the emotion inside of her. She wanted to spill her own tears, to cry with them. For them. For the first time, she truly saw them, she truly saw the years-worth of pain and suffering in their gaze.

"I'm here for you. Both of you. I sincerely mean it."

Trina choked up and the water in her eyes spilled out. "The way those men touch me. The things they say, the things they do. It hurts, but it feels normal, like it's supposed to be that way. Like what I felt with Jason was wrong."

"I-I can't say anything because I've never felt that way about anybody. Still, I know from what Sam and I talk about-it isn't supposed to be like that. That's not love, that isn't respect or trust." Her tears slid down her cheeks and she made no attempt to wipe them away. "I don't know what you girls went through, and you don't have to tell me, but know that it was wrong. Whatever causes the pain that I see right now, it shouldn't have ever happened."

Tori whimpered and tore her gaze away. "What do you do when your view of relationships are so skewed, Cat? Even I've never felt the warmth that you're apparently supposed to feel. Those that I dated, Danny aside because he was a bum like most men…I never felt any warmth, and certainly not what Trina and Jason had."

"The one man who you're supposed to trust," Trina started, "Inflicts a wound so deep." Trina swept her fingers across her brow and started to tremble. "And I'm rambling. Ignore me."

Cat took a deep breath and pulled her hands away. "No." They glanced at her and she leaned forward, moving her arms around them. "I'm not going to ignore either one of you." She pulled them into a hug and closed her eyes as they began to sob. "You're both important and shouldn't be ignored. Whatever's in your past shouldn't be ignored either."

"Robbie knows," Trina's response was muffled but still loud enough to hear. Cat leaned back and furrowed her brow as Trina pulled away to wipe her eyes. "What I do. He knows. He saw. Just like every other man, he-"

"What?" Cat shot a glance at the door and swallowed down the brief rush of anger inside. Could this have been what Robbie was talking about a few moments ago? "What did he do, and why was he even in that part of town?"

"I don't know Cat, it's full of prostitutes. Figure it out." Cat's eyes widened and Trina let out a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that to be spiteful. I just-he wanted to solicit. He saw me, and I guess he thought I was easy or something." Tori turned to look at Trina, her eyes now filling with the same anger that Cat felt. "I refused to have sex with him or to take his money, and he said either I do it or he tells what I do. I said no, he left."

"So nothing happened?" Cat rubbed her chin and looked towards the door. "But still…"

"Please don't say anything to him about it." Trina exhaled and crossed her arms. "I don't want to run the risk that he blabs to all of the others about it." She wouldn't say anything, although it would be difficult not to confront him.

"I won't. Know that it was wrong of him to threaten you like that, okay?" She looked to the door and relaxed the muscles in her body. "He's been acting a little squirrely lately, though. Jade, Andre and Beck are genuine about wanting to be there for you guys, I told them to give you some time."

"Thanks…"

"As for Robbie, he seems to think he's screwed it up for everyone." Cat turned to the girls to give them a gentle and reassuring smile. "Whatever happens, don't let what's happened with him affect the others. Okay? They're willing to try, to work on things, don't let him hinder that progress."

"We'll give them a chance," Tori muttered with some difficulty, "Right now, I don't want to talk to them. Don't make me. Please."

"I won't. You don't have to if you don't want to."

"Thank you."

"They are downstairs. Would you like for me to go down and let them know to just go home for the night?"

"May as well," Trina replied, "I think Tori's done for the night. I am too." Cat nodded and made her way to the door. "Hey." She stopped and looked back. "Dad has started drinking again, and I think he may be out at a bar today. So…do you think you could stick around for a few hours? Tori and I are going to stay up and watch a movie, we'd like some company."

"What about the others?"

"Nothing personal, but we're a little testy at the moment."

"So you don't want them around. Got it. I'll tell them to go ahead and pack it up." She smiled openly and set her hand on the doorknob. "I'll be happy to stick around to watch a movie with you guys though."

Making her way down the stairs, Cat tried to push down the storm of emotions raging inside of her. It was a difficult hurricane to quell, knowing what she heard. Without implicating anything directly, the girls painted a horrible nightmare in her head. She could hardly imagine the horrors they experienced growing up, and how difficult it must have been for them to say anything in that moment.

Especially for fear of being judged. Trust was the wrong word, but they confided in her without knowing if she'd turn away from them. She couldn't turn from then knowing what she knew now, she wanted them to trust her, to see that she did care and wouldn't judge them for something beyond their own control.

"Hey guys?" The friends were seated around the couch in silence, each twiddling their thumb or staring aimlessly into space. Upon hearing her voice, they turned to look at her, each with anxious looks in their eyes.

"Is it bad?" Beck asked, "They never want to see us again, do they?"

"No." He let out a sigh of relief, which led the others to do the same. "They don't want to talk to you guys tonight, though. So it's best to just go home, but give them some time. But, a little advice."

"Yes?"

"Don't do what you've been doing before. Be more open to their feelings. I get a sense they're going to need that." She rubbed her arm and turned her head to the door of David's study. "You guys might think you're the negative influence or the monster in their lives…you're nowhere close to it."

"You think we've let our own issues blind us to theirs, though. Ours are important too."

"Nobody said they weren't. The stuff you go through makes you who you are, I guess. Just…go home, relax, and Tori will see all of you when she's ready to." They nodded and began to leave. Only Robbie stayed behind, still trembling with guilt.

Cat put her hands to her hips and studied him, not wanting to converse with him for fear of saying something she shouldn't. "You leaving too would be wise." He looked up at her and frowned.

"They didn't say anything? About me?" Cat crossed her arms and swayed to the right, still giving him a silent glare.

"I'm going to repeat myself. You leaving is best."

"You don't understand." He stood up and put his hands to his chest. "I thought I was helping."

"Helping? Helping how!" She wanted him to enlighten her on how threatening to expose Trina's lifestyle was helping. She scratched at her forehead and groaned. "You know what, you've always disgusted me. I thought poorly of you when you did the whole breakup song thing, but I could forgive that."

"I…I sent a letter, Cat." She froze and fixated a glare onto him. He bowed his head and clenched his fists. "I don't know. I thought maybe he could talk some sense into her. Help her out of that life."

"What? Who? What are you talking about."

"Their dad." Her eyes widened tremendously and her nostrils flared. The anger coursing through her led her to nearly lunge for his throat. "Trina's been involved in some stuff…so I thought if I told their dad, maybe he could get some help for her."

"You did _what!" _He took a step back as her voice shot into the air. "Their father is the last person to tell, you fucking ingrate!" Robbie flinched as she began to approach him, ready to throttle him. "You better leave, and never show your face again." She raised a finger to him and scowled as he shrank on the spot. "Because if I ever see you, I don't know what I'm going to do. If what you did causes those two girls any amount of pain, then I don't know what I'm going to do to you."

A pair of headlights flashed by the window, followed by the sound of a car screeching to a halt. Cat froze as Robbie turned his head over his shoulder. She heard a car door slam, followed by the sound of two voices shouting at one another.

"Shit," Robbie trembled as the shouting increased. "He sounds drunk, and their mother sounds…anxious?" Holly's voice was pleading, trying to keep David away from the house.

* * *

><p>And here we have it, I've given to you early a taste of what's going on.<p> 


	23. At the Crossroads

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 23 (At the Crossroads)<p>

The door flew open, and with it came a wave of heat that drew the sweat from Cat's nervous body. Holly was pulling at David's wrist, shouting profanities at him while also pleading him to stop.

"I should have done something about this years ago," Holly cried, "I let it get out of hand. Don't you dare go near them when you're like this! This wouldn't have happened, our daughter wouldn't be like this if it wasn't for you."

"Get off me!" David roared and pushed his wife back. "Don't you think I know that? Why the fuck do you think I've been staying away when I drink!"

"Don't you touch them, don't you dare lay your filthy hands on them!"

"Like you're going to do anything about it." Cat seemed to be invisible to them, or perhaps this man's rage blinded him to their presence. The man tilted his head back and bellowed out. "Katrina and Victoria Vega, get your fucking asses down here this instant."

"Devil!" Holly spied Cat and pleaded through a tearful gaze. "Please don't let him get upstairs." The mother threw herself in front of David, calling upstairs. "Don't come down girls, find somewhere safe! Your bastard father's drunk again."

Cat's first instinct was to try and tackle the man, but he was much stronger than she was. What good would attacking this man do? If she left it alone, he might do something terrible, and she couldn't let that happen.

"I know what you've been doing, you little slut." David's voice was full of scorn and a hatred that pierced Cat's heart. "I've been avoiding home while drunk to protect you, but damn if I didn't know you were giving yourself out to diseased men." The man's voice slurred and drew the bile in Cat's throat. Her lungs burned and she scanned the room for something to use as a weapon. "Let daddy discipline you."

"Stay the fuck away from my girls!" Holly tried to push David back, but he wouldn't budge. "I've let this get out of hand, I should have done something about it a long time ago!"

"Are you still going on about that? Leave it alone!" He pushed her back, causing her to fall onto the floor and against the wall. She let out a loud gasp and looked up to the man with a terrible whimper.

His eyes scanned the room and stopped on Robbie. From what Cat could see, Robbie was trembling and his pants had a wet spot on them that wasn't there before. She groaned and turned away as David lunged for him and grabbed him by the throat.

"And you, you little fuck. Sending that letter to my office at work, you think I wouldn't know the only way you'd know anything about my daughter's choice in life was because you were out looking for a whore in the first place? If you think for a minute that I'm going to let you put your hands on my daughter, then you've got another thing coming."

Cat ran to Holly's side, helping her to stand while David was distracted with Robbie. "Are you okay, Mrs. Vega?" Holly rubbed the back of her head and groaned softly.

"I-I haven't seen him like this in years. But…he's hardly ever been angry when drunk, just-he'd do things…" She shook her head and whimpered as David threw Robbie against the wall. "I would ignore it, I'd let him get away with it because I…no, you don't know. You don't need to know. You're seeing David at his worst, this isn't-this isn't my husband. I don't know my husband." Her voice trembled and tears fled down her cheeks. "I haven't known my husband in years-Gary, Gary's always cared about the girls. He cares more about them than David ever has. They just don't see it."

Cat looked around the room, struggling against her fear to find something to stop this man. Her eyes stopped on a golf club beside the door, Beck had left it behind. He brought it to show everyone his favorite club and to tell him about his new hobby in golf.

"Forgive me, Mrs. Vega." She breathed out softly and ran for the club, ignoring Holly's cries not to hurt the man. "And forgive me, Beck. I know you like this driver…"

Fueled by the adrenaline inside her, she lunged for David, who had a fist raised to strike Robbie. She swung the club down onto him and heard Holly scream out as she clutched her abdomen. David fell to the ground, unconscious, and Cat aimed the club at him to make sure he wasn't faking.

Heavy breaths fell from her as she turned to see Holly fall beside her husband. She was surprised to see this reaction, and a bit confused. This man was clearly dangerous, so why was Holly acting this way all of a sudden?

Robbie stepped beside her, rubbing his neck. "T-Thank you, Cat." She narrowed her eyes at him and let out a low growl.

"That wasn't for you. He could have pummeled you. He had to be stopped before he did something to his family." Robbie started to say something, but took a step back as she raised the club at him. "Get the hell out of here, Robbie. Before I hit you next. This is your fault. Also, if you say _anything_ about Trina's lifestyle to anyone else, I'm going to come after you. Not to mention, I will tell them you were out looking for prostitutes in the first place."

"Okay, okay!" He raised his hands defensively and backed himself towards the door. "I'm done. Honest, I'm sorry, I regretted my decision. I didn't know this was going to happen."

"You shouldn't have had to know! You shouldn't have said anything to start! Get out!" She lashed out at him and sneered as he bolted for the door. She was not a violent type, and this was the last thing she wanted to do, but it had to happen.

She looked up to the top of the stairs and saw the girls looking down with fear in their eyes. "I-Is he-" Tori trembled as she studied her father's motionless figure. "Is he okay?"

"He'll be fine," Holly remarked, "Get some ice and help me get him to the couch." Trina and Tori hurried down the stairs to fill their mother's wish. Cat could only watch as they treated David's injury.

_"Why aren't they focused on getting the hell out of this house?"_ Trina caught the confusion in her eyes and responded, as if she were reading Cat's mind.

"He'll only get pissed and come after us. Regardless, this man is our father." He was not much of a father from what she could see, but she wasn't going to judge. She started to make her way to the door, but Trina called out to her once more. "Don't leave. Please. Stay with us."

"Are you sure?" She saw the anxious emotion in the family and watched as they tensed and examined the man's wound. She moved to the recliner and sat down with a heavy sigh. "Okay, I'll stay here. I um, should I apologize for hurting him?"

"Don't bother." Trina stood up and dusted off her clothes. "He wasn't going to stop. He never…stops. Not when he's drunk, anyway. I'm just sorry you…and Robbie had to see that."

"I can't believe it!" Tori screamed. "I can't believe Robbie told him. You should have hit him, Cat. That's what I would have done."

"Wouldn't have been right," Cat replied, "Believe me. I wanted to."

She waited with them for what felt like an eternity of silence. For hours they family sat around David, who lay as though asleep. His breaths were shallow and the bulge in his eyelids seemed to move every so often.

When he did wake up, the family was still there, waiting. "What happened?" David moved his hand to his back and groaned with pain. "I feel like shit."

_"You are shit." _Cat studied the expensive golf club still clutched in her hand. Beck would be furious, but what did that matter at this point? "Sorry Mr. Vega. I thought you were going to hurt Tori or Trina." She lifted the club and he studied it with a tense expression. "I had to."

The club was bent a little, and likely worthless. She was surprised Beck never came back to retrieve it. The man was likely respecting the wishes of the sisters by staying away.

"I don't want to, I'm not violent, but I'll use it again if I need to."

"I'm not typically violent either." He closed his eyes and groaned painfully. "I don't want to hurt my family. I caused them enough pain when they were younger, I just…I don't know what my fucking problem is. No. I don't want to have a problem."

"You do. You drink too much."

"I've always drank, before I met my wife. I just…when I drink I turn into another person. No, you don't know. You don't need to." She rolled her eyes and waved her hand in the air, dismissing his statement. "I can't control myself, and now, knowing what I know now…"

He looked up at Trina and she tensed under his lengthy gaze. A sickness seemed to come over the man, one that made Cat nauseous just watching. "I cannot condone what you're doing, Katrina. I want you to know that. As a police chief, I can't have my daughter running around like a common…no, I can't." Trina's face twisted with fear while Tori's eyes widened. "Then as your father, as a sick man, I cannot-no, you cannot be under this roof and promote yourself in that way."

"What are you saying?" Trina's voice grew quiet and the air filled with silence that was only broken by the nervous sniffling coming from Tori. Cat could feel the tension rising up to strangle them with its icy claws, but she dared not to say anything. "Dad?"

"Don't call me that. As long as you're…no…"

"You're not doing this," Tori interrupted, "You're not kicking my sister out! I won't let you!" David's voice rose and he shouted back at his youngest.

"It's for her own good!"

"No it isn't!" Tori growled and threw her hand into the air. "You're doing it because of your stupid reputation as a police chief. If they knew what kind of person you were…you wouldn't even _have_ that reputation. If mom had spoken up when we were younger, if someone did something, you know what you'd be?"

"Nothing. I'd be nothing. I am nothing, regardless!"

"Fuck you, Dad. You're not doing this."

"I don't see there's much of a choice. You know my word is final. I will not have my daughter living under my roof as long as she's prancing about town like a common whore!"

Trina gasped out and Cat cringed. She struggled not to say anything in defense, but knew that her word would do nothing to soften this man's rage. "She's not a whore, Dad." Tori growled angrily and poked a finger at him. "It's your fault we're the way we are, anyway."

"Mine? Excuse me, but I've done nothing."

"You know damn well what you did! Don't try to hide behind some fantasy you have of being a halfway decent father. You're not one!"

"After all I've done for you two, you think it's okay to talk down to your father?"

"Trina is just trying to figure out what is real in life, just like me, only differently. You fucked that up for us when we were children, and you know it! Mom didn't help either, because she only allowed you to do whatever the fuck you wanted!"

Holly turned her head away and David tried to sit up, only to fall back in pain. Cat was beside herself with grief and anxiety. How much of this conversation was she supposed to be hearing? She was tempted to leave, but didn't think the girls would want her to, yet this was clearly not something she thought they wanted her to hear.

"Stop it Tori," Trina's voice was quiet yet shattering. Tori looked over with a mournful look while Trina's body trembled. "If…our father wants me out. Then I'll leave."

"Trina, no!" Tori grabbed Trina's wrist and gazed at her sister. "Please, you don't have anywhere to go. You can't go back out there, you just can't! Dad's just being an asshole, he'll get over himself."

"He's made himself clear, Tori." She pulled away and walked to the door, ignoring Tori's protests. Cat closed her eyes and bowed her head as the girl let out one last scream which shook the house. "Do you see what you're doing, Dad? You're destroying this family. Why! Why do you do this!"

Cat stood up and made her way to the door, not wanting to hear anything more. She said her farewells, and intent on going after Trina. Tori was right to be concerned, and she didn't want Trina to be without anyone to turn to.

As she hurried out the door and turned down the street, she caught a glimpse of Trina in the distance. "Trina, wait up!" The woman stopped and turned around.

"What?"

"Just, hold on." She hurried up and winced at the anger on the girl's face. "Look, I know you don't have anywhere to go, so-"

"I'll find somewhere. I've made some friends out there on the street, so surely someone will help me out." Remembering Sam's words about the types of friends somebody could find, she couldn't bring herself to accept Trina's words.

"No, that won't do. Listen, Sam's moving out to be with her fiancé, and I need a roommate." She took a deep breath as Trina studied her. "Before you make any rash decisions, please just think about my offer."

"What?" Trina chuckled and looked away. The moonlight revealed her tears, a sight that struck a painful blow to Cat. "Me? Move in with you?"

"Yes! I need someone to help with the babysitting business, to help with rent of course. I can't pay for rent all by myself either, and I don't like being alone." Cat looked back to the Vega house in the distance and pressed her lips together. "Not to mention, Tori will at least know you're safe. That's important too, right?"

"I…guess so."

"Just-" Cat reached out and pat Trina on the upper arm. She smiled reassuringly and held the girl's uncertain gaze. "Come to my place. Get some rest, coffee and breakfast. Think it over, alright?"

Eventually she let out a defeated sigh and shrugged. "Okay, fine." Relieved by Trina's answers, Cat nearly jumped for joy. "I'll think about it. You drove here, I guess?"

"Yeah."

"Then point the way to your car. I'm tired as hell."

* * *

><p><strong>C<strong>hapter's up.


	24. Monster in the Dark

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 24 (Monster in the Dark)<p>

Sam awoke at the sound of the front door shutting. She sat up and shot a look at the clock, frowning at the time. "Who's coming in at five in the morning?" She looked towards the door with fear as a light switched on. "Cat? Is that you out there!" Shouting wasn't going to do good, because it would make someone realize that she was alone in the house. "Shit."

Picking up the bat beside her bed, Sam pulled it up and pushed her feet into her slippers. She made her way out the door and down the hallway. When she heard Cat's voice, she lowered the weapon and breathed out a sigh of relief. "I swear to god, Cat. The surprises are getting old."

She dropped the bat and walked out into the main room where she saw Trina standing beside the redhead. "Trina?" The girls turned to her and Cat waved happily. "Cat, what's going on?"

"Trina's going to be my new roommate!" Sam parted her lips and looked to the brunette with curiosity. Trina let out a heavy sigh and shrugged.

"I didn't say yes or no yet, but I've been kicked out of my house by my father." Sam winced as Trina folded her arms across her chest. "I think I have a serious problem though." Trina sat on the couch and ran her hand over her cheek. "Robbie found out what I do, he told Dad. For whatever god awful reason, he told my _dad_."

"I'm sorry you went through that."

"Of all the people he could have told." Trina's face was wet with tears and stained with red streaks. Sam wished she could take away the girl's pain and suffering, but the only thing she could do was offer words of encouragement and guidance. Something she needed once in her life that was what this girl likely needed most. "Do you know what that's like?" Trina pulled a portion of her hair from her face and looked towards Sam with flaring nostrils. "To have your family turn you away?"

"Unfortunately, I do. It's not easy and it's not fair. I know you probably have a lot of anger too."

"No shit, I feel like everything is spinning. I shouldn't even call him my dad, he's the devil is what he is! A hypocrite in church, a man of good fortune in the eyes of the media, but a damn devil at home." Trina's hands clenched and a vein bulged from her neck. "All he spews is a lie! Somehow he thinks he's better than me." She began to tremble. Her eyelids closed over and her head began to shake from side to side. "Me and Tori…he ruined us. Wrecked us, fucked our lives up so we would never be normal."

"Trina…"

A sneer spread across the girl's face and her hair fell before her eyes. "'Daddy's little girl', he called us." Sam saw Cat turn away in disgust, a sign she that the redhead figured it out. "'Special'. He loved us a way no man did." She scoffed and threw her head back. "Drunk words from a drunkard. Jason made me feel a way that I was happy when he touched me, I felt something I…I don't know what it was. I wanted to recreate that. I still haven't."

Sam's stomach twisted and she cleared away the lump in her throat. "That is why you turned to what you did?"

"But every man's touch is just as demeaning, just as degrading and just as filthy as-" Trina stopped on a sudden mark, her voice cracked and a whimper fell from her barely parted lips. "I'll never know what it feels like…to be in a real relationship. To be in a true relationship with a man who loves me. How can I, if I don't even understand what the fuck it is?"

Cat spoke first, reaching out to take Trina's hand in hers. "It'll be okay, Trina. It will." Trina shook her head, speaking with a still shaky tone.

"How do you know? Tori and I…we talk constantly how better off we'd be if we were-no, I can't think like that." Trina brought her hand up to her forehead, rubbing the heel of her palm into her right eye. "As much as it's true, I can't." Cat frowned and Sam bowed her head.

"You know, Trina…" Sam rubbed the girl's back and spoke softly, hoping her calm voice would soothe her. "Your sister has a session with me in a couple days. My boss is sitting in."

"She told me. Wants me to go with her. I fail to see the point, what it will solve." Trina inhaled sharply and Cat handed her a tissue to wipe her eyes with. "I…I will go, but I don't think anything's going to work. We're too far gone, Sam. We can't be saved. Can't be helped. We're as fucked up as our father-and it's his fault."

"Everyone can be helped, Trina-even him." Trina scoffed and threw the Kleenex away. "I know you don't want to think about him being 'helped', and you don't have to. Still, you can make it through this. Both you and your sister." She was reminded of Carly, lying motionless on the bed with water drenching her, barely breathing and barely alive. Pleading for death. Her heart broke at the image and she immediately pushed it from her mind. "Nobody is ever too far gone. You and your sister are alive, and both of you are hurting, but pain is not forever like people think."

"Whatever."

"Sometimes talking about it makes things better. Maybe a joint session with you and Tori will help. You never know until you try." Trina sniffed once and looked over to Cat.

"What about you, Cat? If I move in-I know you're not comfortable with prostitution. You surely have ground rules."

"Yeah I do," Cat replied, "I'd rather you not be involved in that life." Trina wiggled her nose and Cat curled her fingers over her knees. "I'm not going to force you out of it, but…I don't want you bringing any men here."

Sam chuckled fondly as Trina's lips curled into a tiny smile. "Sounds like the ground rules Jonah and Valerie set up for me back in the day, though they were much more strict." Trina's eyebrow rose and Sam shrugged. "But then, my issue was a tiny bit different." Still, knowing Cat, Trina would be kept busy.

Aside from the babysitting, Cat always kept Sam on her toes. Then there was Goomer and Dice, who were almost always coming over with something they needed, as though they lived there.

Living here, Trina wasn't going to be given much chance to prowl the streets. Maybe Cat could wean her away from that life, slowly but surely, and Trina would turn away from the destructive path she was on.

More heartache was something Trina did not need in her life, as was the same for Tori. When Sam wanted to go into counseling, she knew she wanted to help girls escape the situations they were in, but she never knew she'd run into something so serious.

Or she was aware, but she always thought it would be later in her career, when she was more seasoned. Yet this was one of the first things she had to deal with, and it frightened her how unprepared she was. Thankfully Alice was there for her, as were the other counselors in the clinic.

Trina walked to the kitchen and turned on the water. She ran her hands through the water and splashed it onto her face, groaning in disgust as the liquid drenched her hair and dress. "Filth. That's all I am. To anybody. Disgusting, dirty, unclean…"

"That isn't true." Sam stood and walked over as Trina shot a glance at her. There was an emptiness in her eyes and a sneer at her mouth.

"Spare me." Trina lifted her hand and looked at it with a broken gaze. "How many men have touched this? I was once taught that sex was meant to be between two people who genuinely loved one another. I was taught also that in any kind of relationship-friends, family, lovers-there's a line you don't cross. You don't do things that aren't right, don't muddy the waters. Yet, as a kid? Were the waters muddy? Yeah, as a kid I was filthy!"

Trina's voice jumped up, then lowered to a near whisper as she slammed her palm on the counter and leaned forward, narrowing her eyes. "Tori too…we didn't have a chance, we were young and naïve. Little girls susceptible to any monster that came out of the dark."

Sam swallowed hard as Trina remarked with scorn, her eyes filling with anger and hatred that was matched only by a similar level of pain. "Your mom and dad, your protectors. They're supposed to keep the monsters away, making them retreat into the shadows. The monster in the dark…" Trina's eyes clenched tight and she turned her head, groaning with nausea.

Pain swelled in her voice, and commanded silence in the room. "Just like the police are supposed to protect you from the villains, your father's supposed to protect you. When we were young, we didn't know the difference…we thought it was how our dad protected us. Kept us _safe_." The last word rolled off Trina's tongue with mockery and saliva.

"Even now I can't get the stench of alcohol out of my head, out of my hair. I'll never forget our 'protector' was also the devil…" Trina paused for a minute and looked off to the side. "And our mother? She just sat there. Crying silently as she stared into space. Watching as the fucking monster corrupted her little girls!" Trina's voice roared out with anger and she slammed her fist into the counter, screaming in pain and anguish. "So you go ahead and tell me I'm clean, or that I can be helped. Maybe there's some sense of recovery for me, I don't know. What I do know is I'll never be able to _forget."_

"Neither can I." Sam held her breath as she gazed into Trina's pain-filled eyes. "I can't possibly imagine what you've gone through, and I wouldn't attempt to try. I know the hell I've been through, and I can say I got out. Will I be able to forget? I struggle with it from day to day, but I'm growing. I'm getting stronger because of it, and you can too. You're alive, and that's a start."

Trina rubbed her wrist and walked around the counter, groaning lightly. "It doesn't feel like much, doesn't seem to mean too much."

"What you and your sister went through was wrong, and it never should have happened. It never should have been allowed." Trina stopped with her back turned. Her shoulders fell and her head started to bow. "That doesn't change the fact that it happened. As much as I wish I could take that pain from you, I don't attempt to deceive you or myself into thinking that I can. All I can offer you is a way out, and a step to recovering-coping…"

"I can never have a normal life."

"Why? Why not?"

"I don't deserve it."

"Because of what? Your father? Those men?" Trina scoffed and Sam moved up to her, speaking with a gentle whisper in her tone. To her right, Cat was sitting silently on the couch, watching Trina with tears in her eyes. "You might not think about it, but Carly and I thought the same. We thought ourselves just the same as you do right now, said the same things about ourselves…"

"Yet do you see your father? Smell your father every time?" She turned around and glared into Sam's eyes. "Even in your dreams, all you can think about is that vile son of a bitch. The difference between you and me, Sam? You and your friend got you, you escaped a life of hell-_I'm still living it."_ Trina crossed her arms as Sam took a slight step back, uncertain what to say. "So if you think you can help me, help Tori, then all means go ahead and try. Every day that man is glorified by every person in LA as the their protector, my sister and I are reminded of the truth that he'll never own up to until the day he fucking bites it. I guarantee you when he dies, I won't be at his funeral-I don't want to see the most celebrated fucking man in LA with his crowds of millions."

"I understand, and I hope you know, I won't give up." Sam was filled with determination and a strong desire to save these girls. Even if Trina didn't think recovery was possible, she knew the truth, and wanted to do all she could to help Trina see that things could get better. "On you or your sister. I'm not going to give up."

"Why?" Trina rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Because it's your job?"

"No!" Sam's voice rose slightly and Trina stepped back for a moment. "Because I care. I _want_ to help you, I want to help your sister. I know a little about what you're going through, and I want to help you any way I can. I'm not about to give up on you."

"Anyone else would."

"Wrong," Cat replied meekly. Trina flinched and looked over her shoulder, suddenly remembering the girl's presence. "You're my friend, Trina Vega. So is Tori. I care about you both, and I'm not going to give up either. That said, I'm cementing my offer, you're staying with me as my new roommate."

"You've got to be joking."

"Do I look like I am?" Cat's face grew serious as she stood from the couch. Trina unfolded her arms and chuckled nervously as the redhead took a step towards her. "I don't know what's going on, or all of it. I know you're hurting, and I know this prostitution lifestyle of yours is just an escape, but you don't need it. You can be safe right here with someone that does care about you."

"No one else gives a shit, why should you?"

"Why shouldn't I?"

"Because I'm worthless."

"Not to me. Also, clearly not to Jason, who is still out there looking for you!" Cat threw her hand to the door and Trina stared down at her feet. "So that man cares something for you too. I don't think he would hate you because of your life, or even what happened in your past."

Trina quieted for the moment and spoke under her breath. "Nobody's ever given a shit." Her eyes began to water as Cat looked from her to Sam, then back.

"Then I guess it's about time someone started. I don't care what you're involved in, I don't care what that bastard of a father did. You're not a bad person, you're not unlikeable or dirty in any way."

"I…don't want to talk about this anymore." Trina shook her head and started to whine. "Can I just go to sleep? Please?"

"Yeah," Sam replied, "Go ahead and take my bed. It's on the left side of the room-I'll sleep on couch."

"Thanks." The girl made her way to the hallway and stopped in the doorway, setting her hand on the frame. "Could you-maybe leave the light on? And Cat? Just knock when you come to bed."

"Will do," Cat smiled at her and nodded once. Sam folded her arms and watched the girl disappear into the hall. She was proud of Cat, and pleased that Trina could find a friend in her. After a few seconds, the girl fell onto the couch and buried her head into her hands. "God…"

"You okay?" Sam sat beside her and rubbed her back.

"It's just a lot to take in, I…never knew how bad Trina and Tori had it. Their father-I can't even think." Cat lifted her head and looked over to Sam. "She-They will be okay, won't they?"

"In time. Everything takes time. Things will get better. Just don't stop being their friend, don't stop showing them that you care."

"I won't…God knows I won't."

* * *

><p>And that's the chapter.<p> 


	25. Taking the First Step

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 25 (Taking the First Step)<p>

"I'm glad you could be here," Tori hugged her sister tight in the doorway of Sam's office. Tears filled her eyes and drenched her cheeks while Trina only replied with a grunt. "Cat said you were staying with her. I was worried. I'm glad you're okay."

"Yeah." Trina hugged her sister back and breathed out slowly. "Cat has these friends of hers, they're nuts." The girl laughed gently and shook her head. Sam looked to her mentor and boss beside her with a grin. Alice knew about Dice and Goomer, there were many stories she'd been able to tell that made her laugh. "Also I've been doing some babysitting with her, so I haven't had much time to get out of the apartment. Visiting her grandmother is…interesting."

"Good, I'm glad she's kept you busy."

"Funny." Trina sat down with her sister and looked across the room at Alice and Sam. "So you wanted me to be here, Tori. I don't think it'll do much good, but who am I to judge without giving something a chance? I hope you've been alright with mom and dad…"

"They've…been quiet lately." Tori brushed her hair back and shrugged. "I've kind of been avoiding them by hanging with Jade and the others. Though Robbie hasn't been around much anymore, not that I'm terribly upset over it. With the shit he caused."

Trina curled her fingers around her bangs and swept them back over her head. "Don't curse, Tori, it's not like you to curse." Tori laughed once and leaned into her sister, throwing her arms around her.

She turned her head up and set her chin on Trina's shoulder. "I can't have a sailor's mouth like you? That's hardly fair." Her sister scoffed in response and teased a smirk.

"I do _not _have a sailor's mouth!" Trina looked over and mouthed for them not to believe Tori. It was amusing and nice to see the two sisters sharing in this moment of playfulness, especially with all the tension that they dealt with. It gave Sam some more hope and belief that she could reach them, to help them.

"Do too! You say 'fuck' and 'shit' a lot more than most people I hear."

"I get frustrated and pissed easily, does that mean I am a sailor as well?"

"I tried counting one day. I lost track multiple times." Tori's eyelids fell halfway and Trina laughed. Tori hugged her again and let her body relax. "I miss you. I wish daddy didn't kick you out. Still, I'm glad you're staying with Cat."

"Yeah well, I almost said no, but then she decided to make it mandatory."

"I don't like being alone in that house, Trina. Knowing Daddy's been drinking a lot more, I'm scared. He's not come home drunk since that night, but you know how it is. I also want to find Robbie and punch him in the jaw."

"He isn't worth it, Tori."

"I know." Tori let out a heavy sigh and started to chuckle. "Beck was distraught over his golf club. He spent his entire allowance on it. I don't think Cat has been able to explain what she used it on or why, but then…I really don't want them to know what dad's like."

"I know." Trina cleared her throat and gestured to Sam as a reminder of where they were. Tori looked over and flashed a small smile. "Let's get this session dealt with, Tori, then maybe you and I can grab a quick bite or something. Cat wants me at the apartment after this to help babysit."

"Okay…I guess she knows? She was there for Dad's outburst."

Trina rubbed the back of her neck and let out a soft groan. "She knows a little more than that. I kind of lost it, ended up revealing some stuff to her." Tori tensed as Trina glanced to the girl. "I'm sorry Tori."

"Does anybody else know about it?" Sam inquired, deciding to ask the first question. The girls looked at her and Trina's brow furrowed. "About what your father did, what he's like?"

"The only other person would be Jason. Obviously when he and I, you know…I had to tell him something, to explain why I was acting a certain way." Trina's gaze faltered and her nose crinkled. "He was…kind to me, gentle and understanding. Though, I was still suspicious, thought maybe he'd want nothing to do with me. I opened myself up to him, it was painful…He was the first person I ever told."

"You know you don't have to tell anybody you don't want to." The girls nodded. Sam crossed her legs and leaned back. "Even me, even Alice. We're here to listen, to help, but you don't have to say anything that you don't want."

"Thank you. Really."

"If you're up to it, why don't you girls tell us what happened the other day? What's going on with your parents, that you got kicked out of the house?"

"Prostituting." Trina shrugged as though it wasn't that big of an issue. "I mean, Dad found out and threw a shit fit with Cat and Robbie there. He was drunk."

"Has he been drunk before?" Alice inquired. Trina nodded and Tori spoke up quickly.

"He's never been an angry drunk though! He's never come to violence. Just…other things." Tori paused, long enough for Alice to ask her to explain. The girl closed her eyes and shook her head. "I don't want to say. If I don't acknowledge, then it never happened, right? Never existed."

"Many things happen in life we don't want to acknowledge or accept." Alice took a deep breath and smiled calmly at the girl. "Yet the way to healing is to accept and move ahead. If you fight to ignore something, then it still rules you, still holds power over you. If you accept and work to recovery, it ceases to hold power over you."

"I…understand." Tori took her sister's hand and squeezed it for comfort. "There's just-we have a lot of anger and pain to work through, I don't want my family to fall apart, but I don't think I can stop it." Tori folded her hands in her lap and started to shake. "I've heard talk of forgiveness, but I don't know what it means really. I don't want to say what our father did was okay."

"Forgiveness isn't about saying something is okay, it isn't at all condoning something, but rather telling the offending subject that it will no longer control you, no longer harm you. It is taking a step forward to healing, to coping and recovery."

"It doesn't feel like this sort of pain will ever go away."

"It will get easier with time, but you have to be open to the recovery process." Alice looked from Tori to Trina. The elder sibling slouched and crossed her arms.

"I'm open to it," Trina scoffed, "I just don't think it can get better. Not when I've put myself in a hole this deep." The important thing was that she was talking, and whether she realized it or not, talking would help. It let things out that a person holds in, and can make a person feel better once it's in the open.

"You mentioned Jason…" Sam uncrossed her arms and waited for Trina's gaze to slink into hers. "Would you like to tell us a little more about him? How'd you meet, what was he like? I'm aware that I already know a little, but I'd like you to remind me of him."

"Well. He's a great guy." Trina tucked her hair over her ear and let out a gentle sigh. "Caring, understanding, and I thought the world of him. Still, a part of me does. We met at camp, and I was attracted to him-I didn't understand it at the time, or I did and I just didn't want to-I don't know."

"So you had feelings for him."

"I guess. Yeah, I did." She closed her eyes and a faint smile grew on her face. "I don't really know how or why, but we had sex and-" Trina's eyes opened and stared at the wall in front of her. Tori took her hand and gave it a squeeze, causing the girl to react with a flinch. "Sorry, I, it's hard to think about. Jason wasn't bad, he understood me, I-I told him what happened. What dad did to us when we were growing up…Jason said things, made me feel _good_."

"What did he say?"

Trina shrugged and tightened her grip around Tori's hand. "You know, things like, good fathers don't do that. He said he wouldn't hurt me, and he wouldn't do anything I didn't want to. I think I was curious, to know if…" Her voice broke and tears started to well up in her eyes as her body trembled.

Tori leaned her head against Trina's shoulder, tearing up as well. Alice handed Trina a tissue and she took it, using it to wipe her eyes. "The way I felt with him, whether it was just spending time together at that camp or during that one moment of sex, I felt secure. Safe. I don't know enough about love to say whether or not I felt that, but there was something."

"He was good to you, a good man."

"Yes. A good…" Seeing the wordplay, Trina lifted her head. The skin around her eyes tensed and the corners of her lips pulled back into a straight line. "I never really thought about it like that."

"There are many good men in the world," Alice began, " but it's hard to find them when you've been through the things that you and your sister have been." Trina nodded once as Alice set her coffee mug on the coaster nearby. "A father is someone you're supposed to be able to trust, and when a man like that oversteps the line that a father never should, then it's even harder to find a man that you can be with. When you do find that good man, it's hard to distinguish him from others." Alice leaned back in her chair and studied Trina for the moment. "You mentioned that you've gone into prostitution. Why is that?"

"I just wanted to feel what I felt with Jason." Trina's eyes lowered and her hands clutched the fabric of her dress. "I couldn't. Every man that I've been with since has-they've been demeaning, degrading, disgusting…"

"Yet, you're still in that life?"

Trina inhaled sharply and clenched her eyes shut. "I don't know anything better." Her eyes shot open and her voice started to rise as she locked her eyes with Alice. "You tell me. You tell me what a girl like me is worth." Her nostrils flared and she ignored Tori's attempt to shake her arm and console her. "If the best type of guy I can get is a drunken sleaze with his own agenda-isn't that what's real? That's the image I get, you know. My father slinking into our rooms, mom crying in the living room." Trina pressed her hands to her chest and voice seemed now to bounce off the walls. "All the bastards that pay me for sex-that's all I'm good for."

Sam breathed in, remaining calm as she thought of a response. It caused a great deal of pain to see Trina like this. Then there was Tori, the distress in her eyes told an entirely new type of situation. Or, perhaps not that new to Sam. It was a look that Melanie had once, of fear and confusion.

"It's hard, I know." Sam spoke with careful steps, trying her best to choose the words that would help Trina the most. "The struggle to see any worth in yourself when you've only seen men and women who want to use you for sex." She swept a tear from her own eyes and cleared away the roughness in her throat. "It's easier to ignore the worth that we are to other people."

"I just-"

"Know also that you're not alone, and you don't have to be. You have someone sitting right next to you who knows _exactly_ what you're going through." Trina scrunched her face and turned her head to Tori. "She's been where you are, and still is. Still needs her older sister because you have been somewhere that she hasn't."

"What do you mean?"

"When you spoke about Jason just a minute ago." Trina looked back and Sam curved her lips into a smile. "There was a light in your eyes, a single glimpse of hope." Trina let out a dry chuckle and moved her hand to scratch at her neck. "When I want to know how much I'm worth to someone, all I have to do is look into Derek's eyes, and I know. That man thinks the world of me. It sounds like, to me anyway, that's what you struggle with."

Trina started to scoff, but said nothing. Sam took a deep breath and uncrossed her legs. She leaned forward and looked directly into Trina's eyes, gaining the girl's attention. "When you were with that man, you say you don't understand the way you felt. That is normal, and given what happened to you two, it's going to take some time before you fully realize what that feeling is-but know that the way you talk about him and how he made you feel-that is what's real. Maybe you saw your 'worth' when you were with him, maybe he thought the world of you…loves you."

"No, I-I don't know what love is."

"Doesn't mean it doesn't exist." Sam motioned to Tori and leaned back. "You love your sister?"

"Of course!" Trina's eyebrows moved together and she looked to Tori, then back to Sam. "Not in a sexual way or anything-"

"No. You see, what you and Tori went through with your father distorts that. What you've been through with prostitution, further distorts-just as my past did to me." She tapped her foot on the ground once and watched as Trina started to tense. "There are different types of loving someone. There's the love you feel for a sibling, the love you feel for a parent, a child, or a friend-then there's the love you feel for a spouse or a lover."

"It is also not about sexual intimacy," Alice added. "Love is trust, it is respect. Caring for somebody on a deeper level. That is why when it comes to sex, there's the term 'lovemaking' which connects two people who are deeply in love with one another and they trust the other with something as important and sacred to them as their body."

"You may have felt that when you were with Jason." Alice twirled her pen around her fingers and raised her eyebrows. "Which, it seems to me is a place that Sam says you've been to which your sister hasn't. It isn't a place that neither of you can never reach, it's a good place to be. Only, first I would focus on the question you have of what you're worth. All you have to do is look around you. Your sister, your friends-both of you are worth a lot more than you may realize. I want you to think about that, okay?"

Tori moved her head away from Trina's shoulder, chuckling weakly as she wiped her eyes. "Jade, Beck and Andre keep telling me they want to be good friends. I told them a lot, and a lot of it backfired, but they seem to be sorry and they want to be there for me-Cat too. It's…It's really strange to see them so different. Jade's being less critical than she normally is, or she's trying to be anyway. It's hard for me to think they're doing it for me."

"Right." Alice smiled at her and looked towards Trina. "And you're dealing with the same scenario, are you not?" Trina rolled her eyes and held onto her faint smile.

"The minute dad threw me out, Cat comes running. Tells me she wants me to be her new roommate. Later on, she insists-now she's got me spending all this time doing stuff with her."

"Then girls, I want you to think about something for me. If you were worth nothing to these friends of yours, would they make all this effort? I'd also like to leave you with some 'homework' before our session next week." Tori and Trina exchanged looks and shrugged. Alice turned to Sam. "I think Sam, would you go first?"

"Gladly." Sam turned her eyes between the two girls and breathed in slowly. "This next week focus your time on each other and your friends. Spend time with them as you have been, but I'd like you to carefully observe how they are around you. Write down what you see, how they treat you and how they talk to you. Next week, we can discuss that."

"I guess we can do that," Tori remarked, "At least I'll try."

"I'll do it too," Trina muttered. "So far it's only Cat." The girl paused and gave Sam a suspicious look. "You say nothing about my prostitution, or about talking to Jason. Why?"

"Well. What do you want to do, Trina? I can't tell you everything you have to do, Alice and I are only able to guide you. You have to want to improve your life, to recover and move forward-we can't do that for you."

"I see." Trina looked at Tori and exhaled at her sibling's sorrowful look. "I don't enjoy prostitution." She tilted her head back and her chest trembled. "It's funny, I kind of enjoy working with Cat. Babysitting. At least doing that feels…well, it feels worthwhile."

"There's that word again."

"I know. Shit." Trina ran her hand through her hair and chuckled once Tori smacked her arm for the curse. "I'm still skeptical about this process, but…I do want to get better. I want to be happy."

"Then what will make you happy, Trina?"

"I don't know. But working with Cat-I guess it's a start." Cat does have her charms, this much was certain. It was a spark of hope, so Sam could utilize this to help Trina the best way she could.

"So then start with that." Trina raised an eyebrow and Sam smiled with reassurance. "Instead of going out at night, having sex with strangers…I want you to continue focusing on this new roommate situation. Spend time with Cat, help her out with babysitting, chores and so on."

"So then, don't be a prostitute? I don't know if it's that easy, I mean-"

"It's not easy." Her voice softened momentarily and she shook her head at Trina. "Once you get into a life like that, it's never easy to just walk away. Believe me, I know. It's going to take time, and you need to be patient with yourself. Allow yourself the time to heal. Alice and I will be here for you two all along the way, so will your friends. It's a step at a time, but it'll be worth it in the end. I guarantee you that."

"Yeah…and Jason? I mean, I know he's probably still in LA-still looking for me or waiting for me to show up."

"Go to him only when you feel like you're ready to. It doesn't have to be tomorrow, it doesn't have to be next week."

"What if-he won't wait around forever. I know that…"

"Maybe, maybe not, but I think he understands that you need time." Trina nodded, and for a brief moment, Sam caught a glimpse of joy in the girl's eyes. When she looked to Tori, she saw the same with her. This was a grand sign, and it was only the first step. "So if you two are up to another session, we can set one up for you next week."

"Yeah, sure…" Trina rubbed her chin and looked at Tori. "Um, joint though. I don't know if I'm ready to separate from my sister in these things." At times individual sessions could be harder for a person, simply because there wasn't another person to take up some of the talking. Sam understood this, and she would be more than willing to accommodate.

"Gladly, I'll set one up."

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><p>First joint session seems to have gone well.<p> 


	26. The Right Choice

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: This isn't so much a filler as it pertains to something that helps Sam along in her own personal thing, but I wanted to go ahead and get this out of the way so I'm giving it to you early.

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><p>Chapter 26 (The Right Choice)<p>

"What do you think of this house?" Sam sent the pictures to Derek and observed him as his eyes scanned the computer. The home she was showing him, the owner let her take pictures for this very purpose. It was a beautiful house with sandy brown walls and peach carpeting. There were three bedrooms, one of which could be converted to a study and the other a guest room. The living room was large and connected to the kitchen, there was a den and another large living room as well.

"Looks beautiful, Sam. How much did you say it was?" Sam hummed and went to check the price.

"Rent starts at $1500. Monthly." Sam frowned and quickly glanced to Derek. "Is that too much? I can't find a lot of apartments for rent that are cheaper." Derek laughed and shook his head.

"Not too much. Do you like the house?" She was ecstatic about it, and of course the owner said there was plenty of time to move in. They could move in the next day if they wanted, of course she had to be realistic about it.

"I love it. I think it's gorgeous!" She'd already shown the pictures to Carly, and the girl thought it was remarkable. Douglas wanted to play the competitive tough guy and say it was nowhere near as good looking as their home, but Carly put that to rest. "The owner says I can move in whenever I like. The price is reasonable considering the military is taking care of my schooling."

"Then if it is in good condition and you like it, then I say it'll work." She practically jumped out of her chair with excitement, but kept herself well reserved. His approval meant the world to her, and his allowing her to make the decision on the house meant a lot as well. "What will you do with the extra bedroom?"

"I'm thinking home office. Granted I won't work from home, it'll still be a nice place to set up an office space for me to work on college or study a client's file if need be." Derek scratched his chin and approved with a nod.

"Sounds like a good deal. Take the offer if you want it. I like the house a lot."

"I'm glad. I think it's the best one I've looked at so far." The phone on her desk started to ring, causing her to flinch. "Ah, I need to take this." Usually her boss or the girls at the front desk called this phone. Clients could as well, but it wasn't often since her list of clients was still relatively short at this point.

She picked up the phone and heard the receptionist's voice at the other end. "Sam, you have someone on your way to your office. They requested you by name." She scrunched her nose and nodded.

"Alright, I'll take them. Send them in, and thank you."

"You're welcome."

With a heavy sigh, she turned back to the pc and smiled sadly at Derek. He gazed back at her and chuckled once. "Alright, you've got work to do. I need to get back to work myself. Let me know how the deal with the house goes. I love you."

"You too." She blew him a kiss and turned Skype off with dismay. "Can't wait for you to be back here…" As she turned around, the door slid open. To her shock, she saw Daisy's head poke through. Her heart stalled and she clasped her hands together above her abdomen. "Daisy? Come on in."

The girl slinked in, alone. Sam half expected to see Lexy with her. "Hi Sam. I um, saw you come this way." She raised an eyebrow at the girl, watching as she sat on the couch and twiddled her thumbs. "Lexy and I were in the area and I saw you walking from the parking garage."

"And where is your friend?"

"Working."

"I see."

Daisy's eyebrows dipped down in the middle and her lips formed a full frown. "I knew you were lying that night. You scared Lexy away from that Marine, but I knew you had to be lying. You're a counselor, and you…you left the industry. Why would you go back?"

"There are a lot of men and women that leave and go back." She understood the girl's anger, but certainly that was not the sole reason for her appearance here. She had to put her personal bias aside, but it would be hard. "If you need counseling, I'm more than willing to refer you to someone at this clinic that can help you without-"

"I want to talk to you." She frowned as the girl bowed her head. It wouldn't be ethical because of personal bias, but Daisy sounded adamant. "If it's no trouble."

"No trouble. I can put our history aside." Daisy lifted her head and her lips formed an oval. She then looked away and shrugged.

"Good. I was nervous just coming in, I know what you must think of me. An enemy, a monster."

"No, not at all. You're human, and every human does things that may be good or bad. You're in a place where you can say anything you like, you will not be judged." Daisy started to smile and turned her eyes to the corners. "Why have you decided to come here?"'

"How? How did you get out?" The girl looked at something on Sam's desk. She turned to see, it was the photo of her standing with Derek after he proposed to her. "You're…blushing there. You look radiant, beautiful and happy."

"I still struggle from time to time, but yes, I am happy with him."

"He treats you right? Doesn't, you know…"

"He's good to me. Yes. He knows about my history as well, and he's accepted it as a thing of the past." She took the picture and handed it to Daisy. The girl held it tenderly as though it were a fragile object to break at her touch. "In fact, he was the one that helped me out of the industry. If you can call it that."

The longer the girl stared at the photo, the more she began to tremble. Sam let the silence fill the air, leaving the girl to ponder her thoughts. Tears began to spark in her eyes as her fingers traced the image.

"Why? Why can't I find someone like that? Every man I've been with that wasn't involved with pornography left me once they realized what I was into." Daisy wiped her eyes with her sleeve and handed the picture back. "Those that tried to deal with it eventually left me."

"It can be hard for anyone to accept. Even Derek had his trouble." A hump formed on the middle of Daisy's forehead and the left corner of her lip tucked into her cheek.

"I find that hard to believe."

"Well believe it." Sam chuckled once and returned the photo to its place on her desk. "Derek told me what he went through, what I imagine a lot of boyfriends-or girlfriends go through when dating someone into porn. He said it can be hard to battle the feeling of being insignificant or not enough. Most people don't want to feel like they have to compete with anyone when they're in a relationship, and when you date someone who is into pornography, you're not only competing with every person your significant other has slept with-but everyone that is viewing that person."

"Lexy doesn't think that should matter."

"What do you think?" Daisy frowned as Sam shrugged and spoke simply. "You spend most of your time following her around, listening to her, but now that you're here by yourself-I don't want to know what she thinks. I want to know what _you_ think."

"I think maybe you're right and it's not fair to the other person. I don't know. I just, I've never really thought about it."

"Hm. Well aside from the competitive part, word can also get around if someone they know realizes the person they're dating is a porn star. They combat those people as well, the ones that come to them asking how the sex is, or asking if they can join-or any other derogatory comment." The girl rubbed her arm and looked towards the floor.

"You think maybe that's why I can't get a real relationship and keep it."

"I know what I think." Sam leaned forward and reached out, placing her hand gently on Daisy's wrist. The girl looked into her eyes and curled her eyebrows once more. "A good man can accept that if they truly care about you. My thing with Derek was I was wanting to find a way to get out, I wanted to change-to get better and find someone that wouldn't degrade me. Someone that respected me, cared for me."

"And you found it."

"Yes, but only when I made the decision to leave my past-to leave that life." Sam moved her hand away and closed her eyes. "Do you think for a second a man like Derek, a man who is a son of an Air Force General and prominent in the military…would have dated someone like _me_ if I was still involved in pornography?"

"I-no, I don't think so."

Sam laughed at the thought of Derek's father raging over his dating a porn star. "Well most of Derek's relatives are in the military. If I was still in that life, none of them would have even allowed him to date me. As for him, maybe he would have tried, but he's sensitive though tough. He wouldn't admit it until recently, but it bothered him a great deal that I had been involved in it, but he didn't care."

"I want that. I want out. Lexy doesn't think-" Sam lifted a finger, causing Daisy to stop and muddle over her words. The girl hugged her stomach and sighed. "She doesn't want out, but I do. I'm sick of that life. It stresses me out, makes me feel sick and…dirty. Men degrade me, that's all I am to them is some…some…" Daisy's eyes welled up with tears and her voice trembled.

"It's okay." Sam handed her a Kleenex and she blew her nose. After a few seconds, Daisy took a deep breath and moved her hand up to her forehead.

"You know there's a video out there. Calling Lexy a sex doll?" Sam's eyebrows rose as the girl scoffed. "Like those little inflatable things." Daisy's voice rose to a feverish level and her muscles tensed harshly. "That's all we are to those men, just a hole to stick their goddamn thing into!"

She said nothing, knowing it was best to let Daisy get her anger out. "They don't care." Daisy breathed in heavily, her chest heaved and her body started to twitch. "I once shot something with a group. They wanted…they wanted to do something that I didn't want, so I told them I wasn't going to go that far-but they just acted like they were fucking warming me up."

Sam's stomach churned as the girl wept. Daisy pulled at the bottom of her hair and started to brush it with her hands, grabbing it and sliding her hands along it frantically. "Then they did. Laughing. I didn't want it!"

She pressed her lips together and nodded slowly as Daisy rubbed her right eye. "I'm sorry." The girl exhaled and shook her head.

"It's okay, that's what I'm here for. Say anything you feel you need to, if there's anything you don't want to say, you don't have to." Daisy locked eyes with her and let a whimper fall from her lips. "Nothing you say here will leave this room, okay?"

"I understand."

"You don't have to worry about what Lexy thinks, or what anyone else thinks. You will not be judged, and I'm here to help if that's what you want."

"I…Yes." Daisy looked up to the ceiling, her body rattled like a cage. "The men in that, they think the women open themselves up to have whatever be done to them. They think it's okay, they think that just because we're in pornography, anything is allowed-like we automatically say yes or some shit like that. We have brains, we have feelings and emotions." Daisy's face turned red as an angry scowl swept across her. "We are not a fucking inflatable sex toy!"

"Why compare yourself to one? You are not one, and you know it."

"Because of Lexy." Daisy wiped her eyes again and let out an angry groan. "Because what she thinks is apparently all that matters. I listen to her because I don't have any other friends to talk to. She's brainwashed, or something."

"You realize, there are still those-men and women that enjoy that lifestyle. Just because one does doesn't mean you have to."

"Then tell me what to do! How do I get out?"

"Well…" Daisy was a difficult case to work with because of how big of a 'celebrity' she was in that industry. In many cases, models rated themselves by how many videos they shot. There were awards given out and many other celebrations or events to be had. "It's a hard step to take, and you need to feel like you're ready to take that step-nobody else can make it for you. Not Lexy, not me, not anyone in that industry."

"I can't make it alone, but I am ready." Daisy closed her eyes and her head swayed gently from side to side. "My aunt is here in LA. Originally that's the reason I wanted to come here-to see her. Lexy never let that happen. I think she knows how I feel and is trying to get me to think otherwise, but…"

"You don't want to continue the way you are, do you?" She could see it in the girl, Daisy wanted to make that step but needed the right push to do so. Guidance was what a lot of people in similar shoes needed, and that was why she took this job. "So go to your aunt, go see her. You're not afraid she'll turn you away?"

"No. She-she knows what I've been doing, but she still cares I think. She wants me out of the life, wants to help me. My other relatives won't talk to me…I think even my uncle divorced her just because she was so adamant in wanting to help me."

Her heart sank into her stomach upon hearing the news, yet she was thankful that the girl had at least one relative who wanted to help her. "One is better than what a lot of people have. Go to her, but you realize you may have to cut ties with Lexy. Do you think you can do that?"

Lexy was what many therapists would consider a toxic person in somebody's life. What this meant was that person created a negative influence which hindered a client's esteem or growth. In many cases, it was better for the person to remove that influence from their lives, and they often improved upon doing so.

"I can try." Daisy sniffled and turned her gaze to the phone on Sam's desk. "Can-Can I call her? My aunt?" Sam smiled at Daisy and swept her hand towards the phone.

"Of course."

"Thank you. I'm afraid Lexy might try and talk me out of this. I think-I think it's best I just avoid her altogether. I just know she's going to be trouble for me."

"In cases like this, that may be best. If you feel she is a toxic person in your life that will keep you from doing what you think is best for yourself, you need to cut her out." Daisy reached for the phone and nodded as she picked up the receiver. "Also, I will be more than happy to continue having future sessions with you if you wish."

"If my aunt will help me with that, then yes." She watched, both pleased and proud, as the girl dialed her aunt's number. After a few seconds tears slid along Daisy's cheeks and her voice trembled. She clutched the mouthpiece of the receiver with her left hand and clamped the phone with her right hand, turning her knuckles white. "A-Aunt Ramona. It's me. Could you, can you pick me up?"

Sam closed her eyes and turned to her desk, reaching into the drawer for the clent-confidentiality paperwork. "You can?" The girl let out a relieved sob and bowed her head. "Great, I'm at a therapist's office. I want out, I don't want to make videos anymore. I can't do it alone and you're the only one I can think of who wants to help me."

She continued to gather the documents and looked to the name bar on her desk with pride. _"This,"_ she thought to herself, _"This is what I love about my job."_ Moments like these, and she knew she made the right career choice in life.

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><p>This chapter is also meant to show the obvious, that Sam does and will have other clients. Tori's technically her first client by official means, but she has other clients we won't see or hear about in this tale. For instance, this will be the last you hear or see of Daisy, but not the last time she comes in for therapy.<p> 


	27. Primary Protocol

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: Now this is today's "true" update.

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><p>Chapter 27 (Primary Protocol)<p>

Sam made her way to Alice's office, eager to let her know she secured another client. When she heard Brian's voice, another counselor on staff, she decided to wait outside the door. "I'm not sure if I should report this to you," Brian replied, "I have a client in the midst of an affair who tells me that sometimes he wishes he could kill the other man, but would never bring himself to do that."

"He wouldn't act on impulse?" Alice inquired. Sam knew she shouldn't listen in on this, but it would be good to know what Alice thought about such a situation. Should it ever arise that someone told her the same thing, she needed to know how to act.

"Normally if a client tells you he plans on killing someone, then you need to report it to the FBI, but so long as he isn't planning on it, then you just need to be sure to calm him down. Has he given a reason?"

"The woman he's with has some children, he cares about them and says he's very protective of them. There are times he wants to kill the woman's husband to protect him, but then he knows that would cause them more harm than it would do good, and he doesn't wish to hurt them like that. It hurts him to see them hurting the way they are now, however."

"I suggest to you to observe, Brian. If the client isn't displaying any danger right now, then there's nothing to worry about. However the thought that he would like to commit an act is something you need to monitor, even if he feels he wouldn't resort to such a thing."

"Right." It was nice to see some grey area however, an affair in which the other person actually genuinely cared about the family. This still wasn't her client, nor her business, so she decided to move away from the door to avoid hearing anything more.

She took a seat across the hallway and tapped her foot. She could see Alice at her desk, discussing Brian's issue. After a few seconds, the woman leaned into full view and spied Sam with a smile. "Come on in, Samantha. You may as well."

Sam winced and hurried into the office, she didn't think Alice saw her. "I didn't mean to listen in. I know it's not my business."

"That's alright. You're a new counselor, so you must learn these things as well." Alice cleared her throat and looked to the man. "I was just explaining to Brian the protocol when a client tells you they plan on committing an a crime." Sam nodded as Alice tapped her nails on the desk. "We have strict client-confidentiality guidelines, however if a client tells you he or she plans on committing murder, a robbery, anything like that. Try to talk them down from it, but at that time you are required to report to the police."

"I understand."

"Also understand that you do not _have_ to report it to me. It is a courtesy, yes, and I will tell you what you need to do if you are not certain. As a general rule of thumb, if a client explicitly tells you they are planning an act, you must report it. The same rule applies to a minor that says they're being abused. In some cases it's best to discuss with the parents, but in other cases it is not. Most, if not all times."

"When do we report to you? When do we discuss a client issue?"

"As I am your direct supervisor in clinical matters, it is okay to discuss, however it is important to keep the client's confidentiality in mind. Do as Brian here has done, leave out identifying marks and respect confidentiality."

"Okay."

"Also, if you're working on a treatment team where case info is shared, then it is okay as well." She understood what this meant. Right now, that would be Trina and Tori. Both had the same problem, both were a part of a family unit, and if they chose individual treatment with another counselor on this team, then that counselor would be a part of the initial treatment team.

"Alright, I will bear that in mind."

"Good." Alice moved her hands together and leaned forward over her desk. "So what did you want to discuss, Sam?" It seemed almost miniscule now, but she was still happy and wanted to share the good news.

"I just wanted to let you know I got another client. I'm happy to be working with another and hope to have more down the road." Alice turned up a bright smile and closed her eyes.

"Congratulations." There was a proud tone in her voice, which furthered Sam's excitement. "Keep up the good work, Sam. I'm sure you will have many clients during your tenure here."

"Right. They are someone I'm acquainted with in my past, but they insisted upon seeing me. Is that okay?"

"Oh yes," Brian stated to Sam's surprise, "Many therapists start out with people they met. That's normal for your first batch of clients." He folded his arms and flashed a teasing smirk. "You're still a greenhorn, but you're in a good place to learn. Just wait until you start seeing people come in that would surprise you."

Her eyebrows rose and Alice laughed once. "One thing to keep in mind, Sam. _Everybody_ is a potential client. Even the President of the United States probably has a therapist."

"Well yeah I'd expect that. The stress that has to come with that job is high." Then again, it was comparable to the stress of the person that had to counsel the President. "I enjoy this job though. I like to help people who are in a difficult place. I was in a difficult place and I'm out, but I didn't have anyone giving me counsel, that's why I want to be there to give people counsel that need it."

She took a moment to ponder the possibility of having to counsel even those others considered truly depraved. For instance, she knew of the possibility that David Vega himself could come in, but she wasn't prepared.

Her lips twisted into a perplexed frown which Alice took a second to study. "What's on your mind?"

"Well. You say everyone's a potential client, so what do you do to prepare for the criminal?"

"Treat them the same as if they were any other client. Be impartial if you can and do not judge them. If they have committed a crime in the past, keep in mind that it is a part of the past and they may want to make amends, or get better, or even change…you need to be that person to help them. If you cannot counsel them without personal prejudice, then you need to be honest and refer them to another counselor you feel can help them best."

"Trust me," Brian added, "You will find yourself treating people with stories that make you feel physically ill. They need help like anyone else. As Alice says, if you find yourself unable to treat someone because of something they've done that affects you in such a way, then refer them to another counselor who can help. It's understandable, and you do not have to treat anyone that you do not want to."

"I appreciate the advice." This was good, because she couldn't see herself counseling someone like David, should he ever come in. Yet she knew she'd need practice to stomach issues such as this. Should such a client ever arise, she had to be able to help no matter what the circumstance.

"Don't ever force it." Brian sat on the corner of the desk and folded his arms across his chest. Sam furrowed her brow and pursed her lips as the man dipped his eyes down. "If you _know_ you can't handle a particular client, refer them immediately. You're still new, you're not expected to handle every single type of case that comes up."

Alice agreed with him and gave Sam a serious look while moving her hand to her chest. "There are still certain issues that I cannot treat. I refer them to a counselor I know that specializes in that."

"Exactly." Sam looked back to Brian. "For instance. I specialize in treating people involved in affairs. If you find you struggle to be impartial with a client that comes to you with an infidelity issue, refer them to me. If they prefer a female therapist, refer them to Angeline-who also specializes with infidelity."

"I'll do that. I just feel like as a therapist, I do need to be accustomed to a variety of issues."

"In time you will," Alice stated as she leaned back in her chair. "But you're only human with real feelings and thoughts like anyone else, so bear that in mind. You may be able to handle a variety of issues in time, but by no means are you expected to handle every single issue that comes your way. How can you help treat someone if you cannot put aside a personal emotion that you feel which hinders your ability to treat them?"

"I can't. It's that simple. If Carlos were still alive, for instance, and he came in to be treated-I think I'd still react with anger towards him. For what he put Carly through, for what he did to so many innocent girls, drugging them and leaving them in the state they were." She closed her fists and shook her head as the memory stirred up a deep feeling of resentment. "No, I don't think I could treat him if he were alive."

"Right." Alice furrowed her brow and pulled her lips into a frown. "We do have people on our team that specialize in that. There are people in this office that would treat murders, sex offenders, abusers and so on. The client's going to need to specify that's what they're seeking treatment for, and they're going to have to be referred."

"So these therapists are a special team here?"

"Yes," Brian smiled and wagged his eyebrows. "They like to think of themselves like the SWAT team or Navy Seals of the building." She chuckled at the joke and shook her head.

"It's good we have people here that are capable of treating issues that deep."

"Right. When they don't go to the prisons for their clients, clients that are either on probation or have a crime they committed and possibly paid for so long ago, they treat them here."

"You'll need to know who they are," Alice said, "They don't come out of their offices that much. They're a crucial part of the team and always work with the other counselors, but the type of people they treat leaves them booked up and difficult to interact with. Since we are near the prison, they have a huge amount of clients."

"Okay."

"Each counselor down there has a particular specialization, but can treat just about any issue." Alice reclined and folded her hands on her lap. "Jesse specializes in treating gang members, drug dealers and the like. Erin Anderson handles child offenses, as does Hector. They specialize in treating people involved with kidnapping, or sex offenses towards minors. Robert D. handles kidnapping and general sex offenses. He recently moved his family to California. Jeremy treats murderers and thefts…then there's our newest therapist on the team, Victoria, who handles the mentally unstable."

"So Erin, Hector, Jesse, Robert, Jeremy and Victoria."

"Yes."

"I will remember them if I get any clients that I need to refer to them." Alice nodded and Sam took a deep breath. She felt prepared and ready to take anything on now, and certainly she knew who to refer David to should the man himself ever come in. From the sound of it, Hector would be the best therapist for him.

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><p>We'll see Hector as a therapist. As for all the therapists as a whole, I should say that Sam as well as Alice will <em>never<em> personally treat David.


	28. Cold and Empty

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: This is actually a chapter that was split in two, but because two updates went up yesterday, this chapter will be today's only update of this. However, do know that there will be a total 45 chapters, maybe 46. Either way I'm working on the last few.

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><p>Chapter 28 (Cold and Empty)<p>

"What's wrong, Vega?" Cat listened as Jade inquired of Tori's recent moodiness. Over the last few days, Jade had been strengthening her friendship with Tori. As were Andre and Beck. Of course, she invited them to her apartment every so often to interact with Trina, who was surprised when they spoke to her with respect.

"It's mom," Tori muttered, "She wants us to have dinner with her and Gary." Jade's face scrunched and Cat watched closely, wanting to see if she'd say something derogatory. "It's not that he's a bad guy, I just don't understand why mom has to carry on with him. She cheats on dad and expects us to be on good relations?"

"You say he's not a bad guy, so clearly you've met him."

"He's always been a part of our lives, even before mom started to cheat on dad." Cat's eyebrows shot up as Tori leaned against the arm of the couch. "Mom and Gary have _only_ gone on dates for about three years, but he's been a part of our lives since we were almost babies." She perched her head on her hand and let her eyes drift to the kitchen. "When we were children, he'd treat us like he was our dad. Buy us gifts on our birthdays or holidays, take us to see movies or go to the park."

Cat knew having an affair was a bad thing, but she was surprised to hear how well Gary treated Holly's family. "And you don't understand why your mom would cheat on your dad with him?" A man like David who treated his daughters so viciously deserved to lose his wife and daughters to someone like Gary. At least, that's what Cat thought.

Tori glanced at her and shrugged. "He's still our father, Cat, and Gary's going to destroy this family." Cat raised an eyebrow and Jade shook her head. Of course Tori never talked about what David did to Jade or the others, it was her choice to make, and completely understandable.

"I won't argue it, Tori, but affair or not…Gary doesn't sound that bad. Are you sure he's the one that risks destroying the family?"

"The way you talk about your dad leaves a lot to be questioned," Jade said inquisitively. Tori's gaze shot over to her and Cat stifled a chuckle, it was amazing how observant Jade could be when she really paid attention. "It sounds more like your dad's a threat to the family. If there's a threat at all."

"I guess. I mean, even Trina likes Gary more than dad." Tori paused for a long moment, causing the silence in the room to grow awkward with each passing second. "You know. A part of me likes him better too, but I don't want to think that he's going to replace _Dad_."

Did David really still have this much power over his daughter? She heard Sam mention the term 'Stockholm Syndrome' and wondered if that was what Tori was displaying. It referred to a person that feels empathy or concern for a person that caused them some sort of trauma. It was some sort of psychological issue.

On the other hand it could be a number of things, even based on Tori not wanting to hate her own father or her desire to keep her family together. "Maybe talk to your mom," Jade suggested, "Tell her how you feel."

"It's not that easy. I don't think she'd even care." Tori's face tightened and her eyes slanted with anger. "She's always just ignored shit. Her crime is that she let bad stuff happen and never did a goddamn thing about it." Jade jerked her head back and Cat's jaw fell to the ground. Tori caught their reactions and rolled her eyes. "I know, Trina tells me not to curse because it isn't like me, but I don't know…I just, I'm angry too. I'm angry mom feels like she has to cheat on Dad and ignore us altogether. Shouldn't surprise me, though. Not with the way she was when we were young…"

"Should I ask?"

"I'd rather not talk about that, right now Jade. The past is…still fresh." Jade gave her a respectful nod and reached over to pat her on the back.

"I understand. I won't push."

"Thank you." Cat looked to the hallway leading into the parents' bedroom. Her breathing stalled when she spotted Holly's head poking around the corner. The woman's eyes were wet with tears and her face had grown long.

The Olive Garden was crowded that night, which bothered Cat a bit. Tori asked her to join them as a friend because she didn't trust herself to act appropriately. It was a bit out of Cat's way, but even Trina said it might be good of her to join because her presence could remind the girls to at least be nice.

They sat in a corner booth with Gary and Cat on the ends. Holly was beside Gary while Tori sat next to Cat, leaving Trina wedged in the middle. What followed was one of the most awkward feelings that Cat ever felt while watching Trina munch on a breadstick and seeing Tori's deadly and silent glare on Gary.

At first, she was glad to be on the edges, which would provide for her a quick way of escape to the restroom. Yet the girls asked her to be here for them, and that's what she was going to do. The reason Tori hadn't asked anyone else was because it was Cat that knew the most details regarding their past.

"Let's try to have a good night," Holly pleaded with her girls. She was giving Tori a frown, studying her with great pain. Trina swallowed the breadstick and shrugged.

"I'm up for it," Trina replied, "I'm just happy to have some food, even though I don't really like Olive Garden." Olive Garden had a tendency to skimp on their portions, giving small plates and leaving you to want more. "Not to mention, I'm glad to be spending some time with Mom. I guess."

"I wasn't the one that kicked you out."

"Well you could have said something."

"You…know how your father gets."

"Should that matter?" Gary grabbed his silverware and spun the spaghetti with his fork. His eyes narrowed and his jaw grew heavy. "Holly, you don't stand up to him enough."

"I have my reasons, Gary. Not just because he's my husband either."

"Your daughters should come first, shouldn't they?" He glanced out the corner of his eyes and moved his bite through his lips.

"We've had this discussion, and please, not in front of my girls." Cat looked to the chicken parmesan in front of the mother. It came nearly ten minutes ago and she'd yet to touch it.

"Holly, you always avoid that discussion. You find some excuse to not talk about it. Why?" The woman shrugged and turned her eyes away. The inexplicable sadness in her eyes told a story of a woman who had to endure what must have been ages of horror. The sadness and emptiness gave Cat a terrible shiver that ran along her spine.

"I just don't want to talk about it. Plus their friend is here, so…"

"Your food's getting cold, Mrs. Vega." Holly jerked her head up and looked wide-eyed at Cat.

"Yes, I suppose it is." How broken was this woman? How frightened could she be? Her family was falling apart, she knew this didn't she, but she chose not to act. Could it be she thought avoiding an issue meant it wasn't there, that it didn't exist?

Cat couldn't help but wonder how many times this woman had to sit and hear her kids crying in their rooms, suffering from nightmares and shadows that frightened them. She couldn't help but think of how each time one of her daughters begged for someone to talk to, begged for their mother's help when she could do nothing, how broken she must be.

Simply imagining this broke her heart. What this woman went through was worse than anything Cat could believe or imagine. How does one react when the man you love is a monster? How do you protect your children from their father?

Furthermore, a man of David's status couldn't be reported to the police. Who was going to believe a man sworn to protect the city from criminals would be one himself? How could anyone believe their own boss, their superior, was nothing but scum that didn't deserve to be stuck to the bottom of their shoe?

"I…I understand." Cat spoke softly, her statement drew Holly's gaze into hers. The woman held it as silence crept up around them like a demon to steal their hearts. "I don't comprehend well, but I understand. Fear…isn't something I'm not familiar with. Uncertainty is practically my best friend. Loneliness, I know it all too well. The questions that you can't find answers to, the guilt that eats away at you. Bitterness, hate, resentment…confusion. You don't have to be alone, you don't have to let it destroy you."

"I-don't know what you're talking about." Holly forked the chicken and stared down with a bleak expression.

"You do. You're just afraid to admit it. It's the reason you're with Gary too, isn't it?" Holly raised an eyebrow and Gary lowered his silverware to the table. Tori and Trina had engrossed themselves in their food, so they didn't seem to be paying too much mind in what she was saying.

"Cheating, having an affair, it's wrong and you know it. But you won't leave your husband. Yet, he cares more for your daughters than your husband does." She saw Gary's eyes drift to the girls, full of concern and worry. "It kills you inside, destroys you. For whatever reason you're afraid of that man that you go to bed with at night. Afraid because…you alone know what he's capable of, you've seen it-heard it, and it destroys you. Eats away at your soul. You avoid it because you don't know what to say, how to take care of your girls-how to protect them. Yet you're still losing them…I know you overheard Tori earlier, I saw you looking."

"I-"

"Maybe you think they resent you. Whatever the case, avoiding the subject altogether…if they ever choose to put their father behind them, they'll do the same to you." Holly squinted and her hands began to shake. Cat saw the woman move them beneath the table. "They're seeking therapy, guidance-maybe you should too."

"That's what I've been trying to get her to do," Gary muttered, "Even I've gone for therapy." Holly's head jerked up and she shot him a concerned look. The man looked to her with a bold frown and shrugged. "What do you expect, Holland. I love you, I love the girls like they're my own-you know that. But David…It messes with me, and even I can't keep up like this."

"I thought about it." Holly turned a worried gaze onto her daughters, smiling as they focused still on their food. "I've tried talking to them. I just, I don't know what to say. I don't know how to say what they need to hear." Tears welled up in her eyes and she moved her napkin up to cover her mouth. "I'm sorry for letting your father hurt you? For letting it go on so long?"

"It's a start."

Cat took a deep breath and grabbed a bite of her ravioli. "Sam always says, the road to recovery isn't easy like everyone thinks, and the first step is always hardest. It gets easier as time goes on, but you have to want it. When you want it, you have to be willing to try."

"Sam? Your roommate? The one that Trina is replacing?"

"She's a therapist."

"I see. Maybe…" Holly pushed a bite of her food into her mouth and grimaced. "It's cold now, but, everything has been cold for so long."

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><p>So it looks like Holly may be seeking counsel soon.<strong><br>**


	29. A Broken Mind

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

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><p>Chapter 29 (The Broken Mind)<p>

Studying up on a topic, Sam read through her text and wrote down notes while going through. Occasionally she'd glance up and out the window to study the lake nearby and to admire the shimmering water beneath the sun. Beside her she let her playlist run through the songs on the computer.

The current song playing was _Unforgivable Sinner_ by Lene Martin. It was a good song to push her through her research. Though with her thoughts on the Vega clan, and the treatment plan for them, the song seemed an anthem to David. Rather than hate the man, she pitied him. She pitied how a man, a father, could sink so low as he had done.

David appeared on the news recently. He was talking to the news about a high profile case in which three young women were found dead in their apartment with multiple gunshot wounds. They were stripped of their clothes and bound like slaves.

The words that David said were etched onto Sam's mind. "We will find the monster or monsters that did this to these poor girls. I cannot condone this behavior and cannot understand the depravity and sickness of a mind that would allow for this. The LAPD will not stop until these demons are apprehended. Rest assured, I will not allow this behavior on the streets of my city."

It boggled her mind just how hypocritical such powerful words could be. These words moved the citizens of Los Angeles, they promised protection and security. What good were they, when they came from the lips of a man who might very well do an act just as depraved? Did he even realize that this 'sickness' he spoke of afflicted even him?

Such a patron of justice, such a strong and passionate figure. A household name.

Her thoughts were jarred by her office phone, so she answered it with haste. To her surprise, she heard Alice's voice on the other end. "Sam, I'd like for you to come into my office. I've got a client here that wants you to sit in on this session as well. I think it may be important because it has to do with the Vega's treatment."

"R-Really? Did Trina or Tori come in early?"

"No. Just, come in to my office as soon as you can." Alice hung up and Sam wasted no time doing as her supervisor wished. When she entered the office, she was stunned to see Holly Vega sitting across from Alice.

Holly looked up at her with a weak smile. "I…wasn't aware both my daughters had already come to you." There was very little light in the woman's eyes, and her face looked as though it had been aged ten or twenty years. "You see that recent news report with my husband? I should be proud he's made it to the position he has, but…I'm not. Am I wrong to not sing his praises? Whether we're in church, home, the office, I don't care where…"

"I did see it." Sam moved the chair beside Holly back for space. She took a seat and let out a heavy sigh. "Church. Are you a spiritual woman, Mrs. Vega?"

Lines stretched from Holly's mouth as she pointed her finger to her chest. "You're asking me?" The woman dropped her hand and looked away, displaying very little emotion. I gave up on God a very long time ago. Oh I used to believe very strongly, my family was one of the most pious people you can imagine. The daughter of a pastor, if you can believe it."

"Why'd you stop, if I can ask?" She had trouble spiritually as well, but it wasn't a big deal for her. Still, she was always curious about why someone who was once religious stopped being so.

Holly turned her cold stare onto the television and chuckled dryly. "All you have to do is look at Los Angeles's most celebrated hero. You'll find your answer." Holly's fingers clamped around the balls of the armrests in her chair. "He wasn't always this way, that's why…I spent so long in denial, unable to believe he could be the way he was-thinking maybe he got abducted by aliens and someone I didn't know replaced my husband."

"When you say he wasn't always the way he is…" Holly's head turned slowly towards her and Sam felt a sudden icy chill strike her when the woman's eyes made contact with her.

"We met in college, at my father's church. He and his mother recently moved there. Selene Vega, I will never forget that woman. An old buzzard essentially, she had an evil look in her eyes that I thought could kill in an instant-but not him. David was sweet. Every woman's dream, and he had his eyes set on _me!"_ Holly's voice flickered with excitement and tears peaked through the corners of her eyes.

She set a hand on her right cheek and let out a gentle sigh. "I was as happy as a schoolgirl. The star pitcher on the baseball team, charming and mysterious. God he was a hunk. He recently got a job with the police department, so I knew he was safe. He won my family over with his charm, you knew my father wasn't going to let his daughter marry just any old guy that came around."

"Sounds like a whirlwind romance."

"Oh it was." Holly laughed, but there was an absence in the tone as there was an emptiness to her words. Sam had never seen someone this broken, aside from Carly herself when they found her. Whatever hope this woman had, it was almost gone. "The first time we kissed, we knew it was meant to be. I thought, God did it, he found my match." Holly scoffed as she hung her hand in front of her face and stared at it. "My father was right, God really truly knows what he's doing."

The woman's hand dropped to her lap and her body shook like a leaf in the wind. "Trina was born April 10, 1993. Tori on July 23rd, 1995. They were the most beautiful, sweet, precious angels." Holly's voice now held a warmth that Sam had yet to feel from this woman. She spoke only with love of her daughters. "Then it happened. Somewhere along the way, David started drinking…he'd been drinking before, the stress of his job and everything. But when he came home, he was a different person-a different man. No longer was he the same caring, gentle man I once knew as my husband-but a demon. Like the devil himself had stolen the soul my husband once had."

Sam frowned as she felt her insides twist with emotion. She visualized what Holly must have seen, a man that she recognized but performing acts that were foreign and strange to her.

"Here I was, I couldn't tell anybody!" Holly hugged herself and began to weep. "Who was going to believe me? Who was going to believe that my angels were being destroyed by-by this man that I trusted, that I loved." The woman's voice broke and she hunched over, burying her face in her hands and mumbling incoherently. After a few seconds, she lifted her head and spoke with a soft, yet shaky voice. "By then he was well respected on the police force, I couldn't go to them! The only one I could go to was Gary. His partner. I pleaded-_pleaded_ for him not to say anything. I was afraid…I couldn't save my own children. What kind of mother…I didn't want to lose my babies, I still don't want to lose my babies. It's too late, isn't it? I lost them to that-that-he's no man."

"It isn't your fault, Holly."

"How is it not!" Holly's voice screamed through the walls, causing Sam and Alice both to flinch. The woman's eyes remained frozen on them and her voice continued to rise. "How can you sit there and tell me it isn't my fault? I did nothing, I could do nothing. I was too afraid, I couldn't fathom what this monster was doing to…to my angels. I let him into my home! I married him, trusted him! My babies trusted me, they needed their mother. I should have protected them!"

Sam's heart ached for this woman. This was incredibly difficult to see, to hear, and she was thankful for Alice's presence. She watched as saliva dripped from Holly's mouth with each frantic cry. Each sob echoed in Sam's heart, drawing tears to her own eye.

"I-I should have recognized it the first time. The look in his eyes when he came home drunk. I hadn't even gotten home first, I worked at the hospital-he always finished work before I did. He was there…when the girls got home from school. The first time…Tori was in kindergarten, Trina in second grade. Maybe it wasn't the first, I-I don't know. It was the first time _I_ noticed it."

"Take it a step at a time," Sam spoke finally. Holly whimpered as Sam reached out to pat her hand. "W-What happened?" Holly's breath burst out with a sob and she quickly shook her head.

"It was Tori, she came to me. Said 'daddy's drunk, mama'." She repeated the words and clutched her chest, screaming her daughter's words with greater intensity each time. "Daddy's drunk and Tri-Tri's crying." Holly smiled through her tears, but her chest and body continued to rattle. "Tri-Tri, back then they had cute little names for each other. Sometimes it was Katy, because of her full name. Trina had trouble saying Victoria back then, so that's where Tori got the use of her shortened name."

"What happened next?" Alice asked with soft concern. Holly snapped her gaze over and Sam heard the woman swallow. "When Tori came to you?"

"I…I brushed it off. I went to see why Trina was upset and I saw her with David, it looked like he was already trying to comfort her. He was holding her, hugging her, saying it was okay." Sam closed her eyes and shook her head. "He was still drunk, but I'll never forget the look in his eyes. The same…evil look…in his mother's gaze. I swear to god, if I believed in ghosts, I'd think that woman rose from the grave and possessed my husband."

"His mother's no longer alive?"

"No. She…passed away when Trina was five." Holly relaxed for a minute and used a nearby tissue to wipe the tears from her eyes. "God David was a mess when she died. The one thing I will say that always bothered me about him, but I'd been so willing to overlook, he was a mama's boy." Sam raised an eyebrow and looked towards Alice. Could this be key to David's strange Jekyll and Hyde behavior? It was worth noting. "That man was dependent on his mama."

"Holly." Alice folded her hands on her desk and waited as the woman looked up to her. "Your daughters mention that he stopped his actions at some point."

"That's correct. I thought we could start working on things when he did, but he became reclusive. Threw everything into work and just started avoiding us altogether."

"That's important to know."

"It is?"

"It could be a sign of remorse."

"That man?" Holly chuckled nervously and shook her head vigorously. "No, he'd never admit to any wrongdoing. To admit anything would be to admit he's not worth the reputation he has. If he feels any guilt whatsoever-no, I don't think that's a possibility."

Alice nodded and let out a small sigh. "For the moment let's focus on your girls." Holly's demeanor changed to sorrow and she wringed her hands together. "Do you desire a relationship with them?"

"Yes, I love my girls, but I think…I think they may hate me. I think it's too late."

"It's never too late," Sam replied, "And your daughters will always want their mother. Both do say they love you, but they're angry and hurt. Everyone blames each other, and everyone blames themselves. We're willing to work with you if you really want a relationship with them, we're willing to help repair the trust that's been broken and try to mend the pain that exists."

"I…should have done something. I should have reported it, I should have gotten help. I should have left him, taken the girls and ran. Why? Why couldn't I? What's wrong with me? I have asked myself that question for so long…"

"Nothing is wrong with you. You're scared, you're hurting, and all these memories are coming back to you now. But it's going to get better, believe us, we're here to help you."

Alice set her hand beneath her chin and nodded to Holly. "It's normal to think about what you could have or should have done in the past, but you must realize that those thoughts only bring more pain and regret. The wounds in the past are there, and no amount of dwelling on what should have been done can ever erase that. What you can do, what is important, is that you focus on the here and now, and what you can do to repair what is broken. Maybe you couldn't save your daughters then, it doesn't make you a bad person-you were scared, you didn't know what to believe and you didn't want to believe your husband was capable of doing the things he had done. So save them now, mend your relationship with them, work on bettering your ties with them."

"I'll try. I'm just, I'm scared. I can't imagine how they'd ever want anything more to do with me. Will they really give me a chance?"

"We can work on that," Sam replied. It may take some time, but she was certain both Trina and Tori would come to repair the relationship and broken trust in their mother. "It may have to start with counseling sessions, someone to be there and guide you three through this, but I think everything will be okay. You just have to give it time."

"I…will try." Any future counseling sessions with Holly, Alice would have to deal with. This was a family thing, so they were a team on this, but Alice had more experience to help Holly than Sam did. "Thank you. For talking with me." The woman grabbed her purse and started for the door, stopping momentarily.

"Something else, I didn't mention before." She tilted her head back and let her shoulders fall. "Sometimes I wish I never met the man, never fell for him. Then, I hate those thoughts, I hate myself for even thinking such a thing."

"Why?"

Holly looked over her shoulder and the frown lines around her mouth deepened. "The two most important things in my life came from that man." Sam was stunned. It was no wonder the woman was so torn, so broken. She wanted to hate the man, to regret him and wish she never met him, but in order to do that she would have to wish away the very things she didn't want to lose. Her daughters. "So I can't say it. I can't say I wish I never met him-because if I never did-I would never have Trina or Tori. I'm in pain thanks to him, but imagining a world without my babies causes me greater pain so I dare not imagine or dream. I can't fantasize about a time when I would never have met him, because it would kill me."

As she walked away, her words hung in the air as though glued in place. Sam never considered the impact of such a thing, because for her it was the fantasy or dream of never falling in the first place that gave her temporary relief from pain. That temporary relief was what kept her from letting her soul deteriorate when she was going through her own personal hell.

Holly couldn't allow herself that, so she never let the fantasy come. It was now Sam understood the true nature of what they were facing.

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><p>There's Holly's first session, she really is probably the most broken of the family. Because she has sat there for years in fear, disbelief, horror, unable to do anything. She'll have to strengthen herself, but granted it won't be easy.<p> 


	30. Sickness of the Mind

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 30 (Sickness of the Mind)<p>

David stood beside the pastor at church Sunday morning, gazing out at the congregation. His trembling hands hid in his pockets, with a cold sweat drenching his legs. The preacher was honoring him for solving a major case involving the murder of three innocent girls. It had been his drive to push the LAPD which helped them find the assailants and put an end to them.

"For what is this sickness of man," Pastor Travis proclaimed with a deep voice, "Which compels the human mind to become depraved and commit heinous acts to one another?" He swept his hand through his brown curls and turned his heavy gaze onto his family in the front row.

They each stared off in different directions, with absent and nonchalant gazes. While the rest of the congregation looked up to him with pride, his own family despised him. He knew why, he didn't blame them for it. It was his fault, after all.

A sudden, sharp pain struck his back causing him to flinch as he remember the golf club striking him down. His eyes turned to the pastor and he revealed a sheepish smile. "We should be proud to have the police chief of our great city in our congregation, doing God's work and defending our homes from the tools of Satan!"

He rolled his eyes, but did so in a way to avoid the pastor's gaze. For it is not our place to judge or condemn those who have come down with the sickness of the devil. They choose to walk the path of sin, but God-yes God offers a way out!"

"Amen," David muttered. His hand dropped to his side, drenched by the sweat that had formed on his forehead.

"Let us pray for the men that harmed those innocent girls, let us pray for the girls and their families, may their souls find relief. May god take them in his loving arms and heal them." The pastor bowed his head along with the congregation, but David kept his eyes fixated on them. Why was it he felt like shit? Here the pastor was praising him for taking down another villain, and praying that these people will 'find salvation', and he couldn't stomach it.

_"God's will be done_," David closed his eyes and shook his head, wincing as he listened to a sinister sounding voice in the back of his head. _"On Earth as it is in Heaven." _ His stomach twisted as the voice broke into laughter. _"Don't worry David. King David himself was no saint. You're in good company! Praised for slaying Goliath, but a murderer and rapist in his own right!" _

David put his hand to his abdomen and groaned as he tried to focus on the pastor's words. Instead, he now heard what he thought to be_ Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God_ by Jonathan Edwards spoken in the voice of his very pastor.

"Then they shall be left to fall, as they are inclined by their own weight! God will not hold them up in these slippery places any longer, but will let them go; and then, at that very instant, they shall fall into destruction; as he that stands on such slippery declining ground, on the edge of a pit, he cannot stand alone. When he is let go, he immediately falls…and is _lost!"_

"They _deserve_ to be cast into hell; so that divine justice never stands in the way, it makes no objection against God's using his power at any moment to destroy them. Yea, on the contrary, justice calls aloud for an infinite punishment of their sins! Divine justice says of the tree that brings forth such graps of Sodom, _'Cut it down, why cumbereth it the ground?'_ The sword of divine justice is every moment brandished over their heads, and it is nothing but the hand of arbitrary mercy, and God's mere will, that holds it back."

"The bow of God's wrath is bent, and the arrow made ready on the string, and justice bends the arrow at your heart, and strains the bow, and it is nothing but the pleasure of God, and that of an angry God, without any promise or obligation at all, that keeps that arrow one moment from being made drunk with your blood!"

David's eyes shot open with an almighty amen from the congregation. These words in his head were not the Pastors, and he missed whatever it was the man had said. Did he care? It was a lie.

"Let the sickness of man be washed by the cleansing of God, lest we are to fall to the fires of Hell!" David groaned at the man's words and set his hand to his stomach, subduing the urge to vomit as he felt his daughters' and wife's prying eyes upon him.

_"The sooner I get out of this shithole the better." _

That night the song _God is Dead? _ By Black Sabbath plagued his mind, haunting him. _Rivers of evil run through dying land. Swimming in sorrow, they kill, steal and borrow there is no tomorrow…Sinners will be downed. Ashes to Ashes you cannot exhume your soul! Who do you trust when corruption and lust, greed of all the unjust…leaves you empty and unwhole?_

_ "When will this nightmare be over tell me? When can I empty my head? Will someone tell me the answer! Is God really dead?"_

"Welcome to Hell!" The sign read. David cried out as flames consumed the forlorn hunk of black metal. Before him stood a man drenched in blood, his cold unfeeling eyes peered into his soul and twisted laughter bellowed from him.

"What a fantastic song to fall asleep to. May I recommend 'Damaged Soul' by Black Sabbath?" David fell to his knees with a mighty whimper and watched as this man, shorter than he, rose above him like a mighty tower.

"Are you spirit of Hell?"

"Spirit? Don't confuse me with something so pure." The man touched David's chin, his fingers scorched the skin.

"Devil then?"

"No, I am but a tool of Hell. Demon. But if you wish me to have a human name, you may call me Ross. No relation to any man living or dead that you would know." The demon's laugh mocked him. "I see your soul, black as night, rotten to the core. We have a special place for you, David Vega. Special indeed!"

The demon removed his hand, but David was thrown back by a powerful slashing sensation. He grabbed his throat, gagging as blood seeped through his fingers. "Please! What have I done?"

"You ask me like you do not know the answer to your very question." A flicker of fire flashed in the demon's eyes and David froze with horror as sickening visions plagued his memory.

"No! Those days are over, they are past! I've tried to change, I've tried to work on it!"

"Avoiding is not changing." David bowed his head, whimpering as Ross pointed his hand to the uniform of a police chief suspended in the air. "You are not fit to wear this uniform. You don't practice what you preach!" The creature sneered and let flames burst from his fingertips.

David watched in horror as the uniform suddenly appeared on him, burning with white-hot flames. He let out a powerful wail, screaming as the fire melted his skin.

Another image appeared, one of Tori's friends sitting around a table. "Did you hear?" Andre growled, "What that asshole did to his daughters?"

"He should be strung up!" Beck bellowed. David shook his head violently and lifted his trembling hands to his face. "Someone put the hangman's noose on his neck, even that's too good for him."

Jade laughed bitterly while sharpening a kitchen knife. "I say we cut off that crucial part of his body and feed it to him." David's eyes widened as Andre and Beck cheered the decision.

"That isn't real, Satan! My daughter's friends would never act in such a way!"

"One, I am not Satan. I believe I clarified?" Ross crossed his arms and snapped his fingers, forcing the image to retreat. "Sure that may not be what they'd do, but who's to say? So long as you fear it." He hugged himself and whimpered as a recliner rose from the ground.

The recliner burned red hot and was covered with flaming coals. "Welcome to your hot seat in hell." The demon grabbed him by the cuff of his neck and plunged him onto the chair where his body melted into a painful mesh. "Your seat's hot an waiting, but we're just getting started."

A sneer spread across Ross's face as his fingers slid across David's chest, leaving trails of fire to scar his flesh. "No better than _dirt_. Don't you go and get yourself forgiven. You've been going to church, but you're not clean."

"No! Please! I've been trying!"

"The path to hell is paved with good intentions!" Ross's fist smashed into David's jaw and a cracking sound erupted with an explosion of pain. The man laughed once and withdrew his hand. "So you know, don't go a believin' what the preacher's a preaching. Don't start getting forgiveness, don't go on a life changing journey-we want you right here in Hell."

"Oh god." David whimpered, panicking as his eyes drew skyward. "Oh god help me. Wake me from this nightmare." He screamed as Ross's hands dipped into his abdomen, slicing through his vital organs.

"That's not your ticket out of here, David. God isn't going to help you. He could, but he shouldn't. No, no we know what's best and we'll take good care of you down here in the fire." David continued to whimper as Ross's eyes moved into his. "What good is God up there with his head in the clouds, huh?"

As David's gaze shot to the right, he saw once more the vision of Jade sharpening a knife while Beck tugged on some ropes and Andre assaulted a punching bag. He could practically feel his bones crushing and the slashing of that hot blade.

"Is it not good to see them getting ready? Ready for a killing?"

"It isn't real! None of this is real! You're a figment of my imagination or of a guilty conscience!" Ross threw his head back and laughed as several smaller demons surrounded David's chair.

"Fire her up boys, I want that seat burning at a million Celsius!" David's eyes widened as the flames grew hotter. "That's one million, eight hundred and thirty two degrees Fahrenheit, by the way. No means could a living human survive it, but no worries, you'll survive to see your burnt skin peeling off you."

"No! No please!" His eyes bulged from his sockets as he felt a sweat dripping along his body. After a moment, he could smell blood mixed with sulfur. His nostrils twitched as his chest heaved. "I can be better! I can get better! I swear!"

"It's too fucking late for you, David! You had your chance! Now your soul will rot, burn, forever condemned in one of the hottest seats in hell. And I _don't_ mean that chair."

At second glance he saw it was the chair in his living room, a major part of the sins in his life. Where he bounced his children on his knee, singing to them and telling them stories. Like a good father should.

"But you weren't a good father, David. You weren't a good husband or a good man." Ross walked around him and set his hands on David's temples. The man felt the demon's fingers pressing forward, slicing into him and burning his brain. A scream erupted from his lips as he felt his head catch fire. "Don't worry about your skin, it'll regrow. It always does. It'll peel to the bone again, then regrow, and the cycle will continue."

"Stop this madness!"

"Look at it this way. Fire is _purifying_. It's cleansing you, cleaning you of your dirty and sickening impurities. Don't believe the lie that some messiah's blood will clean you, it's fire that cleanses. Blood just gets you dirty, haven't you seen the movie _Carrie?_"

His heart burst from his aching chest, throbbing with great pain as more flames engulfed him. "Oh god!"

"God has forgotten you, David!" He yelped as Ross grabbed his wrists and yanked them forward, nearly tearing them from his limbs. "There's no salvation where your hands have been!" David's eyes widened as tears appeared in the skin around his wrist, and slowly his hands were separated from his limbs.

"The book says if your hand causes you to sin, tear it off! If your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out!" David screamed as the demon used his own hand to claw out his left eye.

"It isn't my fault! Honest!"

"Oh bullshit! I've heard that before, among all sorts of excuses." Ross slapped his hand into the air and roared with laughter. "Blame the upbringing, it's not my fault. I wouldn't have done this had I not been led to! I'm perfect but I'm not perfect."

Ross leaned close, his nostrils flared and smoke billowed from him. David coughed violently as he breathed the smoke in and remembered his mother from years before. A chain smoker, a horrid which that he swore he'd never turn out to be like.

"Your mother didn't hurt those girls, David. Your mother never got to see them, in fact! Because you never let her." Ross leaned back and a sinister chuckle left his lips. "You were adamant, you'd never let that woman taint them the way she tainted you. You'd protect them, keep them safe."

Suddenly Ross's face twisted into that of a familiar entity. The raven haired Latina with midnight curls and hazel green eyes. Her round face bore an evil reminder. "I'll keep you safe from evil, my little David. Just climb into bed with mommy and you'll be safe."

"Away with you!"

Ross's face returned and flames sprouted from his body as he ripped once more with laughter. "Can't stand the heat David? Can you face the truth!" David trembled as his own head appeared onto Ross's body. "Your father will always protect you, girls. Never fear things that go bump in the night or the shadows on the wall-the demons in your closet. I'll always be right here to keep you safe."

His stomach churned with bile as he covered his face with his hands and screamed. "Enough! Enough! I have seen enough of this horrible vision! I am nothing like that."

"Denial doesn't help, you sad…sad little man."

"I'm not denying anything, but things are different now!"

"Oh are they?" Ross raised an eyebrow and walked towards the side, clicking his tongue and flicking it in front of his face. "Regardless, we'll be waiting for you here in hell. To burn."

"No! This is not my fate! You can't decide that."

"Oh can't I?" The man turned and lifted his hand, causing a bottle of vodka to appear in his hand. "Here, have a drink. On me!" David winced as the bottle was plunged onto him, shattering. Alcohol and glass scattered across his body, creating an explosion of fire and blood.

The image of headlights and a car screeching into a crash flashed in his head. He saw himself being plunged through a windshield, destined only for pavement. "Continue down the path you're on David and you will surely die. If alcohol doesn't kill you, your death will be by murder, and there will be no mourners or tears at your funeral."

"But-"

"Plead your profession if you will." The demon's voice lashed out at him, piercing him deep in his heart. "Like it has been said, good intentions pave the way to Hell."

"Oh god please!"

"Oh _god_ shut _up_." Ross slammed his hand onto David's face and thrust his fingers into his eyes and mouth. Fire coursed into his body and his skin began to bubble while his blood boiled like water on a stove. "Your soul is mine for the taking. Keep up the good work, David, I'll be waiting for you here."

"No!" David shot up to find himself in a dark room drenched by a heavy sweat. He felt a pool of sweat with the palm of his hand and glanced down with sudden relief and shock. "Still attached?" With his hand he felt of his left eye, whimpering softly.

The bed was cold and empty as it so often was in recent years with his wife either sleeping on the sofa or at Gary's home. He was thankful she wasn't there, not with that nightmare waking him the way he had.

"Should I check on Tori? No." He put his hand to his chest and cringed at the thought. Thinking fast he grabbed his cell phone from the end table, catching it as it nearly slid out of his clammy hand.

He sped through the contacts and dialed the one person he thought he could call. A therapist that he'd been seeing recently, but he kept it quiet because he didn't want anyone thinking the police chief needed a therapist. Nor did he want his own family throwing in their own judgments of him, which they likely were right to do so.

Hector gave his phone number to certain clients for emergencies only, and to David, these nightmares classified as emergency. "It happened again," David said once the man answered the phone. His eyes flicked over to the clock and he was startled to see it was three in the morning. "I had another nightmare. That demon, the thing in my head. I'm sick Hector. When was the next session? I fear…I need to speak with you immediately."

Tomorrow would be a good day. Tori was out for the day, so there was no need for him to remain home since he didn't have to go in to work. "Just relax Mr. Vega and tell me what happened."

"I-It's too horrible."

"Then get to sleep and come in tomorrow. I can fill you in at two-thirty. It may be time to discuss medication…"

"No! I refuse to take medication! Pills are worthless, they'll only make things worse with the side effects-then you have to take pills for _those_, which give you more pills until you're taking thirty damn pills a day."

"Okay, okay, calm down David. Are you able to sleep? Are you a danger to anybody or yourself? Are your wife and kids in the house right now?"

"What? No, yes, I mean-god anyone is probably asleep right now and I kicked my oldest daughter out."

"You kicked your oldest out? Why?"

"Because-ugh long story. Just, she got involved in something and you know I can't control myself very easily when I drink! I…I'm scared of relapse, and knowing what she got into, I…oh god what have I become? I'm sick! I shouldn't even be alive-the demon's right. I'm worthless."

"David? Stay on the line, okay. Talk to me."

"No, I'm fine, really." He rubbed his forehead and pushed himself from the bed with a painful groan. "Goddamn pastor this morning. Praising me, he doesn't know what kind of fuck enters that building every morning. The voices in my head, the things I've-oh god."

His stomach was in pain and he felt as though he were bleeding internally. His body still gave him the impression of being on fire, though he was not. "That dream felt so real this time."

"Should I call for a doctor?"

"No! I will not have the chief of police being hospitalized!"

"This is not about your career or pride, or even reputation. This is about your health."

"I'm a sick man, there's no fucking doctor on this goddamn planet that can cure my sickness."

"David? Will you come in tomorrow?" In his anger he threw the phone across the room and sank down on the bed. He rubbed his face and groaned loudly, then turned his groans into pitiful sobs.

Maybe he was better dead, not fit to walk the earth or to look at his wife or kids who could not even look him in the face.

"Daddy?" He lifted his head from his hands, widening his eyes at the sound of Tori's voice. When he turned to look, he saw his youngest daughter standing in the doorway with a concerned look on her face. "Are you…are you alright?"

"Tori."

"I heard you shouting." His heart beat terribly in his chest and his body grew heavy. She took a slight step backwards and his breathing grew shallow as fear and nausea overtook him.

"David?" Hector's voice erupted from the cell phone on the floor. Tori's eyes fell onto it and her nose wrinkled. "David, is that your daughter?" There was a sense of urgency in the man's voice, but David couldn't answer. He was frozen with fear, terrified to speak or even to move.

"I'm sick, Victoria. Your father is sick."

"I know," Tori replied, "I…wish you could get better." She was beautiful in her pink nightgown. Her hair was braided as it always was when she went to sleep. He swallowed heavily and clenched his eyes as a deadly sweat dripped from his pores.

"You always did see the good in your father."

Tori held her breath for a long time, then shrugged. "Not really. I just don't want my family to be destroyed. You're my dad, evil or not." He chuckled vainly and shook his head.

"Evil? You think I'm evil?" Tori's eyebrows rose as he slid his hand down along his face, holding it over his mouth. "No. Don't worry sweetheart, your family won't be destroyed." She took another step back and David turned his head away from her. _"Safe, I keep the family safe."_ The image of his demon returned to mind, bellowing out with laughter. _"That's right David-you keep your little girls safe and secure. The almighty protector."_

"David!" Hector's voice snapped him back to reality and he moved his hand to his forehead with a loud groan. "I've called the paramedics, just to check on you and make sure everything's fine."

"You did-fuck!" David slammed his fist on the bed and groaned in anger. His eyes darted to Tori, now frozen in place. "Tori. Call your mother, or your friend."

"Mom's asleep in Trina's old room." He crinkled his nose and looked into her eyes. His stomach began to twist as a vicious flame scorched his body once more. His muscles tensed as he pushed himself from the bed.

"I…I need to head out."

"To drink again? Please don't. You scare me when you drink, Dad."

"Get away from him!" Holly screamed from another room. David flinched as his wife came rushing in like a blurred mirage. Tori cried out as her mother pulled her back and stepped in front of her.

With the ferocity of a lion, or a bear protecting her young, Holly's terrifying gaze burned into his retinas. Her nostrils spread apart and her eyebrows flattened over her eyes.

David threw his head up as sirens filled the air. Holly sneered at him and held one arm extended over Tori's chest. "Get your things, Tori. We're leaving." Tori's eyes widened and she started to protest, but Holly wasn't having it. "I'm your mother. I know I screwed up a lot, and I picked a shit time to start acting like it, but I'm telling you right now-we are not staying in this house with that…that _devil_."

"But-"

"I do not trust him for a second. Get your things. Now." Holly's eyes narrowed upon David. He took a step back, nearly stumbling over the corner of his bed. "There it is again, David. That look in your eyes."

"What look, Holly?"

"You know what look. Your mother. Don't you dare move-I'm doing what I should have done a long time ago. I'm not going to be afraid of you anymore. I'm a mother, and damn me if I let you corrupt my angels anymore."

Just like that, she was gone. Tori with her. David sat on the edge of the bed with an empty feeling inside his chest. He never wanted this, he never wanted to lose his family.

If he could truly change, maybe he could repair what was broken. Perhaps not, but it simply could not end like this. He didn't want his wife or his daughters hating him.

The paramedics entered the room, when, he wasn't sure. He only knew by their flashlights shining in his face. "I'm fine," he muttered after a while. He threw his hand in the air, dismissing them. "I'm fine."

His wife had taken Tori to Gary's home most likely. He could go after them, but that would cause problems that he didn't want to start.

_"I'm not fine. I'm sick. I'm a sick, disgusting man."_ The devil, his wife called him. He scrambled for his phone and whimpered when he heard Hector's voice, still on the line. The man may not have realized it, but he and Holly may have potentially stopped the devil in him.

"I…am not a religious man, Hector. I believe in a god, a god that is disgusted with me, but this has nothing to do with religion. I'll see you tomorrow. 2:30. God help me. I should be strung up for my sickness. Done in with a hangman's noose like Beck said in my dream…Goodnight Hector. See you tomorrow."

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><p>David does suffer from a great deal of nightmares and hallucinations, but visions created by that of his own mind. He is a deeply troubled man<p> 


	31. Second Sessions

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 31 (Second Sessions)<p>

"So Dad finally lost it. If he ever had it to begin with." Tori shook her head while rubbing her arm. She and Trina once more sat across from Sam and Alice. Sam was trying to determine whether things improved or not for them, but the tone in Tori's voice was concerning, as was the worry that Trina displayed.

Something happened the night prior, she could sense it. Hell the morning news mentioned that paramedics had been called out to the Police Chief's home in the middle of the night, which was alarming. "What happened?"

"I don't know, really." Tori ran her hand through her hair and closed her eyes. "One minute I wake up hearing him shouting, so I go down to find out what's going on. He's throwing his phone across the room and looks like he'd just been through hell or something."

"Then what?"

"I asked him if he was okay and he started to look at me…weird. With a look I haven't seen before." Tori's brow furrowed and she quickly shook her head. "No, I've seen it, but it was so long ago. He hadn't been drinking or anything. He started talking and his voice got really…quiet."

A chill nipped at Sam, inciting a frightful feeling within her. Trina put an arm around Tori's shoulders and pulled her close, gazing at her sister with grave concern. "Mom…Mom actually did something last night. I was surprised. She came downstairs-you know she's been sleeping in Trina's room lately."

"Wait," Trina raised an eyebrow and Tori glanced up to her. "Mom's been sleeping in my room?"

"Yeah. I think she misses you, but that's beside the point. She um, she got defensive." Tori drew her head back and studied Sam and Alice for a long time. "If there was a look I've never seen before, it was the fire in her eyes when she told Dad to back down. She made me pack up everything I could within the next fifteen to twenty minutes, and we left. We left the house, left Dad. Drove straight to Gary's…"

"Damn. As much as I wish I could have been there, I'm almost glad I wasn't. As long as you're safe, Tori, that's what matters." Trina looked to the window and frowned. "I thought I saw Dad's car outside when I got here-but I think I was seeing things."

Sam glanced at her window and leaned back, she wasn't too far from the parking lot. Though it didn't help her to see clearly. "What does your father drive?"

"A red Ford Taurus." She thought she saw that type of car in the parking lot as well. If David was here, then it could be problematic. She looked at Alice with concern, unsure what to do.

"I'll go check." Alice stood up and straightened her knee-length skirt. "Continue the session, I'll be back shortly."

"So your mother moved you out. Did she say anything about Trina?"

"I want to stay with Cat," Trina said with a shrug. This was news, and a bit of good news at that. "I mean to say, she does need a roommate and I actually had an enjoyable week." Trina flashed a smile that surprised her, yet pleased her to see. "I also called Jason…"

Tori let out an enthused gasp and instantly started asking how it went. Trina shushed her and rolled her eyes, still holding a smile on her face. "It was okay. I'm not ready to physically see him, still scared what he's going to think, but…we had a good phone call. He says he still cares about me and wants to see me, but won't pressure me."

"The fact that some correspondence was made is a great step, Trina." Trina toyed with her hair for a split second and shrugged once more. "I'm glad to hear you and Cat have been getting along well."

"Oh yeah. Dice and Goomer are hilarious, by the way." Sam chuckled and thought fondly of them, she couldn't imagine them not charming their way into someone's heart. Even Trina.

"They are full of charms and whims, Trina."

"I can tell. They're good people." Trina set her hands behind her head and reclined. Her chest moved forward as she inhaled deep. "I took what you said last time and observed people. I think…you're right, I saw a lot of instances where people seemed genuinely interested in me. Cat invited Jade and the others over on occasion, we played games and sometimes just sat around and talked for hours."

"Jade's been surprising," Tori added with a look of admiration and surprise. "She's been good at just listening to me and even giving advice. Beck and Andre have done the same. Robbie still hasn't come around, though…not that I want to see him or anything."

"It may be for the best." Trina placed an arm around her sister's shoulders and crossed her legs. "I don't have many good things to say about him right now. Cat refuses to talk about him, saying she never wants to see him again."

"Yeah." Tori snapped her fingers and leaned towards Sam. "Even Jade, Beck and Andre say they haven't heard from him but one time last week. He told them that he valued their friendship, but couldn't hand around with them anymore. They tried reaching him, but he won't talk to them."

While it was disheartening, she recognized it as a potential display of a guilty conscience. "Maybe he feels responsible for David's actions that night." Tori frowned while Trina simply shook her head.

"No. It would have happened eventually. Dad's like a ticking time bomb waiting to go off. If Robbie telling him about me didn't set him off then, something would have down the line."

"Like whatever happened last night." Tori raised her hand, reminding everyone of David's brief stint with insanity.

In a separate wing of the building, David sat with his therapist. He trembled as the man wrote down several notes. Each time he glanced at the notebook, he wanted to know what it was Hector was writing, but he had to stop himself from badgering the man.

"Tell me more about this demon of yours, David." David furrowed his brow as the man lifted his hand up and swept his fingers smoothly across his thin blonde moustache.

"More like a voice that has been in my head for a very long time."

"Does this voice tell you what to do?" David narrowed his eyes, curious whether this man was a therapist or a damned shrink.

"No it does not. I know full well what my actions are, whether or not I like it. I'm disgusted with myself and have been for years."

"And you have suicidal tendencies?"

"Well excuse me for thinking I'm not worth living." He raised his voice, perturbed by the man's suggestion. He didn't have suicidal tendencies per say, but he didn't feel like he deserved to be alive after the shit he put his family through. "I'm a monster, a devil. I sodomized people I care about and made them hate me!"

The statement burst from his lips without a second thought, causing him to stop and pray for a chance to retract it. Hector's moustache bristled with a breeze from his nostrils and his eyebrows curled into the top of his forehead.

"So you are aware what you did was wrong? A man in the police force ought to know this. But now that we've reached that point in our sessions-finally-where you are able to admit to what you've done…." David sank in his seat and looked to the side, groaning as his guilt shot back up, strangling him.

"It wasn't like I did it without remorse. I knew it was wrong, I just-I couldn't stop." He set his hand to his temple and closed his eyes. As his shoulders fell, he began to shake. "I've stared into the eyes of men and women just like me, questioning them, condemning them-judging them…"

"I see."

"I've been particularly harsh on all of them, but not for their crimes. It was like-every time I questioned someone who did what I did. Or worse, if there is worse." He hunched over and clasped his hands together, pressing his thumbs together. "Each and every time, it was like I was looking back at myself. I'd terrorize them, call them names that I would call myself-go so far as to abuse my authority as a police officer."

He hated them, but only because he hated himself. There was one in particular that he could never forget. Juan Carlo, charged with sodomy against a four year old. The law says a person is not guilty until proven guilty in the court of law, but David didn't care.

That man was weak and powerless, defenseless, and like so many others David was this man's lawyer, judge and jury. He turned off the recorder as he had done so many times before, and he beat the shit out of the man until he was a bleeding pulp on the floor.

Did Juan beg for mercy? Yes. David spat on him, cursing him and telling him how rotten and evil he was for touching an innocent child. Then Juan said the truth.

The child had been his nephew, and he was covering for his older brother who didn't know what he was doing and was scared to go to jail. The brother never had an arrest record, but he did, so Juan was taking the blame. Even still, Juan was not the worst of the people he'd attacked.

It was wrong, and David felt like shit for days after. It never left him how that went down. The fear in the man's eyes struck a powerful chord in him, making him question if he was even fit for the job any longer.

"I've done so many things I'm not proud of, Hector. I don't know why. Even-Even last night. If you hadn't called the paramedics, if Holly hadn't been there…" His voice broke and he dropped his head into his hands, weeping as he visualized Tori standing in the doorway. "What the fuck is wrong with me! Why do I do these things?"

Hector stared at him, slowly tapping his pen against his chin. After several long seconds, the man finally spoke up. "What was your childhood like, Mr. Vega?"

"My…childhood?" He didn't want to talk about that. "God, I-I don't know. There's so much I've blocked out."

"The reason I ask is because many times a person in your situation may have a history of abuse in their own life." Hector lowered his pen and his eyebrows fell into straight lines above his narrow eyes. "Sometimes they don't know it's wrong, or they act out because of their own regression."

"My dad died when I was a toddler." He never had a father to show him how to deal with everything, and his mother was perhaps not the best woman. "I was close to my mom. Some might say too close."

"Oh?"

David shook his head, cringing as the flow of memories seeped into his head. Stress lines spread across his forehead, and his heartbeat increased severely. "She wanted to keep me safe from harm, protecting me. She would tell me to sleep with her, and sometimes…" His eyes shot open and he let out a single cry, recalling the memories of his own mother slipping into his bedroom at nights, into his bed. "Oh god! I have turned into her."

His hands flew up to his mouth and his eyelids clenched shut as a bellow ripped through his body. "I think we've reached new ground today, David." This wasn't 'new ground', it only emphasized what he knew already. "But if you want to repair your relationship with your wife or your daughters, it's going to take a lot of work and communication. However, you're the one that's going to need to decide how to go about it. You've got to be willing to work on you."

"How? How can I possibly repair anything?"

"It's possible. It takes time, a long time. You do show remorse for your actions, so that's a good sign." His marriage was practically in shambles, his daughters feared him, and he was a bleeding hypocrite. There was no way he could foresee any positive change.

"I'm screwed, Hector. Royally. I'm not going to fool myself into thinking I can save my marriage, or my relationship with my daughters-what little that exists."

"No. I would say your marriage couldn't be fixed without a lot of hard work and effort. However, your wife would have to be willing to save it as well." The look he saw in Holly's eyes last night had been so filled with hate, malice, and something he never saw in her before. Ferocity. He knew where her primary concern was, and while it saddened him, he was happy for it.

"She's more concerned about the girls. Rightly so, I guess."

Hector curled a finger over his lips and closed his eyes. "Then we'll be honest, David." He already told the man long ago he didn't want to be made to feel better, he wanted the hard truth. He feared that truth, but it had to be heard. "Your marriage. It's probably over."

The words hit him as a punch to the gut, knocking the wind from him. Hector didn't seem finished yet, but this was not a big deal to him. "That doesn't mean you can't have a relationship with your wife or your daughters. It doesn't mean you can't be on friendly terms with them eventually. If you work on you, it can be done."

"That…would take a lot of work."

"And a long time, but if you want them to be a part of your life at all-then you have to be willing to try and make that change." There was a knock at the door, followed by a woman's voice. Hector glanced up and let out a soft exhale. "Yes Alice? I'm with a client at the moment."

"Then I will discuss with you later. I only wanted to bring to your attention the red Ford Taurus in the parking lot." Hector raised an eyebrow and David's head jumped up.

"That's my car," David replied, "Is there something wrong?" Hector asked Alice about the vehicle and let out a hum.

"It's my client's vehicle, Alice. Is there anything wrong with it?"

"No. I suppose not. Carry on." David rubbed his chin and Hector turned back around.

"Sorry about that, David. We still have some time left on our session, so let's make the best of it." He still didn't see much point, but he had to be willing to try this. The only other option he had was to waste away in a cesspool of his own grief and guilt. "Now let us discuss these voices in your head."

He swayed to the right and rubbed his temple with his right forefinger. His shoulders fell and a deafening breath fell from his quivering lips.

"They've been around forever. Haunting me from childhood. I don't have to watch the movie _Carrie_…I've lived it. With a self-righteous, pious but evil mother. No excuse, I suppose, but the voices in my head...tell me otherwise. I've a sickness, Doc. A 'sickness of man'."

* * *

><p>There's not much to say, this chapter is pretty straightforward.<p> 


	32. Finding Strength

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 32 (Finding Strength)<p>

"I had to do it. I had to get my baby away from that-that monster." A monster to Holly, but Sam felt like there was a mental disorder that the man had. Yet she couldn't put a finger on it. "I know I shouldn't be in the midst of an affair, and I probably shouldn't have taken Tori to Gary's place, but I had nowhere to run to."

"You did what you had to. I'd like you to keep in mind that an affair does not make a person a bad person." Alice scribbled down in her notepad. "The important thing is as a mother protected your young. Nobody can fault you for that." Holly's eyes sparked with a new light, but it was only brief. Yet it was an amazing thing for Sam, something that she could be proud of. "Now Gary, tell me a little bit about this man."

"I met him a very long time ago." Holly cupped her hands around her mouth and nose. She looked to Alice's notebook and pulled her hands away with a sigh. "Shortly after Tori's birth. He was David's partner on the force. When my husband's mother died, Gary was there to support."

"When did the affair begin?"

"It's…hard to say when. We did not start to date-and it's only been dates-until about three years ago." She looked perplexed and glanced up in contemplation. Sam leaned forward, bending her elbows on her legs and clasping her hands beneath her chin. "When David started-" Holly choked on her words and moved her hand up to her chest. "I ran to Gary for comfort. Scared and confused. I begged him not to report, I didn't want to lose my babies and I didn't want to think my husband was capable. He was there to support for a long time…but the affair didn't start then. Feelings developed somewhere along the line, but the relationship didn't start officially."

Hearing that some feelings developed, Sam was curious to know about these. She never fathomed grey area in an affair, and it was not her place to judge Holly for it. However, the thought that real feelings could develop was something new to her.

"When and how did these feelings develop?" Holly's gaze drifted to her, and held onto her as though the answer were obvious.

"The way he interacted with the girls, he could have been their father." Sam lowered her hands and sat upright. Her lips pursed as she considered the words, but wanted to know more. "It was never about me. Feelings never would have developed if it were. He treated my angels like angels, he cared about them. He took them to parks, he went to all of their big events throughout their lives while their father stayed back. Spoke to them with respect, with dignity. I fell in love with him, but I'm with another man…and I know it's wrong, but is it wrong to love a man that cares for your family while the one you should love is a monster?"

She didn't know the answer. Sam looked to Alice, hoping the woman had one, but she could see there was no clear response. "There is nothing wrong with loving someone that cares for you and for your family." Alice set her notebook and pen on the desk and lowered her eyes to it. "However your husband may be, you have to understand that it is unfair to all parties. To your daughters, to your husband, to Gary and yourself. Furthermore, there is potential to create confusion for your children. Who do they call their father? A man that has hurt them so many times, or the man that mommy's cheating on their dad with?"

"I…never thought about it like that, to be honest."

"Your children are apt to blame Gary for destroying a marriage, even though he has been good to them. Lines get mixed, waters get muddied. This man sounds like he _could_ be a good father figure for them, but how can he do that if they blame him for something that he may not cause?"

"What do you think I should do then, Alice?" The lines around Holly's mouth stretched and worry washed over her. "I-I'm scared to leave my husband for good. I know I have left him, but we're only separated."

"Separation is good. Your daughters should be in a safe environment. As for your marriage, do you want to save it? That's something important that you must figure out for yourself."

"Save it?" Holly scoffed and dropped her gaze to her knees. "I once told myself that I would never divorce. My dad-my dad was one of those bible thumping preachers, so he didn't believe in divorce." She raised her head and drew out a long exhale. "He was old fashioned-really old fashioned." Her finger curled at her chin and her eyes closed as a chuckle burst from her lips. "I'm talking 'dancing is a sign of the devil', old fashioned. So I grew up telling myself 'never divorce'. No matter what happens, don't ever get a divorce, or else I'll burn in hell."

Holly slid her hand up over her eyes and swayed to the left, moaning softly. "If I don't burn in hell for letting that monster corrupt my daughters first."

"Out of respect for my clients, I make an effort not to include religion in our sessions, Mrs. Vega…" Sam raised an eyebrow and glanced to the cross on Alice's wall. The woman furrowed her brow as Holly nodded gently. "I do not want my clients to think that I am pushing my beliefs on them. However, since you come from a religious upbringing, then I will ask to speak freely."

"Go ahead."

"Divorce." Alice took a deep breath and shook her head slowly. "Is a part of life. It's always advised to work things out, and I think God wants people to do that. I do not think that He would have a problem with divorce if there is a case such as abuse or anywhere where you feel your life or the lives of your children are at stake."

"Have you been divorced? Can I ask?"

"Yes." Sam's eyes widened and she snapped her gaze over to her mentor. Alice raised her shoulders and let the corners of her mouth fall into a frown that showed her age. "I did everything that I could to save that marriage, but in the end there was nothing I could do. In the end, I've found myself in a far better place than I would be had I stayed in an unhealthy relationship."

"I don't think my father would think highly of it."

"If your father is as strong of a preacher as you say he is, would he not believe that God can forgive?" Alice brought her hand up and tapped her forefinger to her cheekbone. "Supposedly if divorce is so wrong, but God can forgive, then He should understand when it's necessary." Her lip tucked into a neat smirk as Holly's mouth opened and closed as a fish's would. "When was the last time you spoke to your father?"

"I…don't remember. Trina and Tori were young, but I've been too ashamed. How could I go to my father and tell him I married a man that is so destructive? Now, I think my father would be ashamed that I let it get so far. Not to mention my affair."

"He's still your father. Why not give him a chance to speak his side of the story? Why not talk to him? He may understand more than you feel he will."

"Trina and Tori might appreciate it," Sam added. Holly's eyebrows drifted up and her lips curved into a smile. "Do they have any other grandparents?"

"No." Holly's smile faded and she shook her head. "David's parents are both gone. If my parents knew what a demon he is…"

"Any caring parent that realizes their child has gone through hell will be sympathetic," Alice remarked, "It may not be wise to assume that your father would not welcome you into his home with open arms. You and his grandchildren."

"The reason I haven't gone is because I don't believe in God's grace anymore." The reply was curt and to the point, and it bore tremendous impact to Sam's ears. "Dad would turn me away, that's been my fear." Holly crossed her legs and turned to the window, laughing once with a sad tune. "It's funny, he doesn't live far from here or anything. Just a short drive to the country. You know that small town outside Los Angeles? The one with probably a population of 900?"

"Cholem, right? I think their population has descended to a lot less than that, in recent years."

"Yes. He lives out there. They have one church, he was the pastor the last time I saw him. Not sure if he still is."

"Well then." Alice tangled her fingers together and set the base of her hands on the table while leaning back, giving Holly a smile while holding a look of wisdom in her eyes. "I challenge you to take your daughters and drive out there." Holly's eyes widened as Alice continued on. "If not for you, for your daughters. You may even find a branch of support from him, which will be good for you."

"How?"

"Do you suppose that Gary can truly be your only means of support forever? If if he cares for both you and your children, he would still eventually be unable to continue to be in a place that may be stressing him out." Holly's eyes widened momentarily, then her shoulders sank. "You will always have me as your therapist, so long as I remain here, but you need someone besides a therapist as well."

"She's right." Sam wanted to bring up the fact that Cat was now a source of support for both girls, and Tori's friends were becoming the same. "Cat's a great companion for your daughters to have, a good friend. In a time like this, though, they also need to be able to see family, relatives that will support them."

"Yet I'm afraid my father will condemn them." Holly took a deep breath and closed her eyes, muttering to herself. "But I want to see him."

"Also consider this." Sam rose from her chair and walked over, placing a gentle hand to Holly's shoulders. "Tori and Trina have seen one dad. Gary aside, who they may judge as a bad guy because of the affair…what if your father were to accept you? To support you? Think of how it could help them to see a father that isn't going to hurt them."

"But how do I _know!"_

"Unfortunately you can't know." Alice grabbed her coffee mug and brought it to her lips, sighing as she sipped the drink. Holly's nose and cheeks twitched as she studied the woman. "You've spoken little of your father during the sessions we've had thus far, and he may be a strict man, but he does not sound like he is a heartless man."

"He isn't heartless, just rough. He never abused me, never put hands on me or mother-or even my brother. For as old fashioned as he was, he supported my desire to work and was proud when I became a nurse."

"You were a nurse?" Sam smiled at the woman and watched Holly's face light up with fondness.

"Oh I was one of the best on staff, or I'd like to think so anyway. I made straight A's in college, was _almost _valedictorian of my high school. Though living in such a small town, that doesn't mean much." Holly laughed whimsically, music to Sam's ears. "And yes, I was my parents' 'pride and joy'. Even my brother, who was almost as pious as dad, would beat any guy that did me wrong…"

Just then, the woman stopped. The empty look returned to her eyes and her body sank into the chair. "I…lost it all. Being with David." Her trembling hands caressed her face and shivering whimpers evaporated into the air. "I quit my job because of him, couldn't bear to face my family because of how _ashamed_ I was of what…what _he_ did."

"I think the key word here is 'he'." Holly's eyes shot out at Sam and her lips pulled into a deep frown. "Because of him you lost connection, you say your life turned upside down." Sam returned to her chair and looked the woman straight in the eyes. "You forget, the only person that has control of their life is that person themselves. You may think that David took these things from you, but in the end, you control whether or not they're taken. You control what happens in your life."

"What if I'm not strong enough? I haven't been…haven't been strong enough for so long."

"But you are strong, and you can be strong." Sam leaned back and smiled warmly at the woman. "You showed that the other night, showed Tori-even Trina that you can be strong."

"Exactly," Alice replied, "Your daughter tells us you looked David in the eyes and stood up to him. If that's not the mark of a strong, confident woman, then I don't know what is. You think he took your family from you, then take them back. Be strong, be the woman that was present that night-you have it in you. You just have to access it."

"I…I don't know…It isn't too late?" Holly's words hung in the air as she studied the two with fresh tears and a tremble in her body. Someone strong had to take risks, they had to do things that they felt were best for themselves and for those they loved. They couldn't sit back and let fear take hold. As Holly had done for so long, the fear in her was deep, but finally she was beginning to crack. She needed to embrace the strength that she pushed down for so long.

Cholem Towne Church, a man of about fifty stood in front of his Wednesday night congregation. He had salt and pepper hair combed over with a part on the right, and a thick grey moustache. "Let not the meek suffer, let not the lost be the devil's plaything who controls with fear." The man paced the stage, preaching on the topic of the week.

"God does not, will not chastise those who have fallen from grace. He will embrace the lost like a father embraces a child who has strayed far from home." The man faced the congregation, speaking with a powerful and deep voice that grasped their attention. "When the devil comes and the demons prey on the innocent, God will be there. But remember this my brothers, it is not by faith alone that you shall escape the clutches of the demon that binds you. No, God wills you to work, to build yourself up and to be strong! It is-"

Just then the doors of the church opened and silence befell the congregation. The pastor was frozen on the stage, his eyes clung to the first thing he could see and was nearly brought to his knees.

In the front row sat an elderly couple. The man was thin but had a strong appearance. His hair was white and his chin covered by stubble. The woman beside him had curly grey hair and a gentle, round face. The couple turned first to see what the pastor saw, and they too were floored by the sight.

"I probably picked a bad time," Holly said as she entered with her two daughters in tow. "I kind of forgot how small the church was-not going to slip in unnoticed, girls."

Trina moved her hand up to her forehead and threw out a sharp breath. "You think?"

"Oops?"

"I feel really awkward," Tori whined, "Everybody's staring at me!"

"Oh like that's ever been a problem," Trina replied rolling her eyes. "Plus it's a small town, practically everyone notices you if you're not a part of the town. Thanks mom, I really wanted to meet grandpa like this!"

"Holly?" The pastor walked slowly down the steps as the elderly couple rose from the pew they were in. His eyes met with hers and quivered as she waved awkwardly.

"Hey John. Or it's Pastor John now, isn't it?" Holly glanced at the couple behind him and flashed an innocent smile. "Sorry to interrupt your, um, service." She looked over her shoulder and motioned to the people. "Girls, meet your uncle and grandparents."

Without warning, her father moved forward and threw his arms around her, weeping. She was shocked when her mother and brother soon joined. For a moment she pondered how the therapist could have been right, but yet, Alice had been working for a long time.

Tears ran along her cheeks as she hugged her family, apologizing for being away for so long. She knew she'd have to explain what was going on with David, but for a reason she could not understand, she wasn't afraid.

"C-Can we talk over dinner or something?" Her eyes flickered onto her daughters, who were standing anxiously before the onlookers. "I think the girls are feeling a little anxious."

"Of course," John replied through his tears, "Of course." He wiped his eye and turned to the congregation, clearing his throat. "Forgive me, church is dismissed for the night. Go home, be with your families." His voice broke and the members of the congregation began to move themselves from their seats.

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><p>Family is always great for support. That last scene is one of my favorites, hah. So the family will be pretty small-tiny compared to Sam's family-as acr likely remembers. John has three kids, of which his oldest son has one child. You'll like what I do with John, it'll be a reminder that even preachers are human. The family will and does accept the Vega women, they may even surprise, but this is a great step forward that Holly has made for her and for her children.<p> 


	33. One Step at a Time

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 33 (One Step at a Time)<p>

Cat laughed as she spoke to Trina on the phone. She was sitting at her table in the kitchen, growing more amused with each detail Trina spoke of her visit. "It's so damn awkward! We didn't expect the Wednesday night service to be so small. Walking in, everyone just stopped and stared at us."

"Well Trina, haven't you always wanted to catch someone's attention?"

"Yes, but not like that. I mean, we went to the place that Mom grew up and someone else lives there now. They said Uncle John was the pastor and Grandpa retired about four or five years ago, but they all would be at the church for the evening service. So we went, not realizing…that of a population of now 734, only a _small handful_ attend Wednesday's bible service!"

Cat was beside herself with laughter, wiping away the tears produced by her amusement. "I thought there were nine hundred people or so living there?"

"Hold on." There was chatter in the background, which held Trina's moment for a few seconds. "I'm sorry, my cousin just corrected me. The sign we saw coming in is old. There's about 622 people living here in town." Cat wrinkled her nose and shook her head at the thought. "Apparently Luke is working for City Hall, Aunt Beth got him a job because she's the mayor of this small town."

"I…see."

"Yes. It seems the last time Mom looked was well over ten years ago, a lot of young people moved and elderly stay-okay that's just depressing." She didn't mind, it was nice to hear Trina and Tori met their relatives. Evidently they'd be staying there a few nights, so she wanted to hear more about how things were going.

"Did you guys talk about your dad yet?"

"Oh that?" Cat waited patiently as Trina fell silent. "Mom explained everything. Why she was afraid to come around here, what dad did to us…even the fact that she's stopped believing in God because of him. It was really kind of personal, emotional. We all just sat around the dinner table, I don't think anyone could say a word for the longest time."

"Oh. I'm sorry?" She couldn't tell if this was a bad thing or not. Judging by Trina's quiet tone, she could tell the girl was impacted deeply by the conversation. "I hope your mom's family-"

"They understand. Grandpa even wants her to pursue a divorce. He wants her to divorce dad and move back here. He even thinks Mom should pursue something with Gary, but wants her to hold off on that until she works things out with Dad."

"I thought you said your mom was afraid he'd be uptight about the idea of divorce and separation."

"She was, but Grandma and Grandpa looked absolutely horrified when she told them what Dad had done. Even Uncle John looked ready to kill someone-and he's the town's pastor!" Trina paused to take a breath, and when she spoke again, there was a softer feeling to her voice. "I guess in his defense, he's always grown up protective of mom because he's older than she is by six years. They all thought highly of Dad, even Uncle John…."

"So your uncle probably feels betrayed or upset that he couldn't see what a monster your father was."

"Yeah, and that he couldn't protect our mother or us from the man." She heard a chuckle from the girl. "Uncle John is…a big man. He's tall, and built like Jason. Mom says he was deathly protective of her growing up, they called him 'Big John', and everyone knew not to mess with her or else Big John was coming after them."

"Isn't your uncle a pastor?"

"Yeah, but no one's perfect. Even 'men of god' sin or whatever. And back then he wasn't a pastor. He was just a pastor's son that got into trouble every now and then for kicking someone's ass."

"Interesting." She had to wonder how that would go over now. It was always expected that pastors be without trouble, but it was a good reminder that even they weren't perfect. "So tell me a little more about this family of yours."

"They seem okay, at least they're fine with the fact that Mom, Tori and I aren't really religious. They're not shoving it down our throats-they seem to care about us." Cat's heart leapt for the family, and of course she stifled a cheer of her own. "John is about six years older than mom and has three kids. Luke, Peter and Sarah."

"Sounds fantastic."

"Yeah. Luke is twenty-seven years old. Peter is twenty-two, and Sarah is Tori's age. Luke's married and has a three year old daughter. Like I said before, he works for City Hall-a secretarial job or something. Peter wants to be a third generation pastor. Grandpa was a preacher, Uncle John's the current and Peter's studying up on theology-already got his bachelors and is going for his master's degree."

"Amazing. How do you feel knowing they've all got plans? I mean, I know you're not in any hurry."

"Yeah, it's just a little difficult for me now, as you know. I'm never going to be a police officer, that's for sure. Maybe just a homemaker, but that would require me actually get married-and right now I don't know."

"Give it some time. You know, talk to Jason, maybe go on a few dates and see how you feel."

"If he'll even accept me. God, I don't know." Cat understood she was in a difficult place, but she had faith the girl could make something of herself and find happiness. "Anyway it's nice know we've got family here to support us. Mom and Tori are actually considering Grandpa's offer to move here, you know."

"Really?" Her heart began to sink as she looked to the hallway. She'd hoped Trina would stick around, but whatever the girl decided was best for her was likely going to be best. Thankfully Cholem was only a twenty to thirty minute drive. "What about you? If they do decide to stay there…"

"I've already decided to be your roommate, Cat. I'm not going anywhere." Cat moved her hand to her chest and closed her eyes while her body grew warm with relief. "Mom and Tori haven't made a decision yet, but they seem like they're really considering it. I think they should. They seem happy right now, so they may actually heal or recover or whatever."

"Happy? You think so?"

"They're in the front room sharing stories and laughing. Sarah even got Tori to play cards. For the first time in a while, I'm seeing my mom and sister actually truly smiling and having a good time."

"And what about you, Trina?"

"I like it. I'm…dare I say I'm happy too? Seeing them this way, seeing an actual family that isn't fucked up. It's a relief." Tori took a deep breath and let out an airy laugh, surprising her. "Luke actually looks like what I'd expect a father to be. He was outside with Madison, that's his wife, and little Deborah a while ago, just laughing and having a good time. She was crawling on him and playing 'horsey'. I sat outside with Madison and watched. Crying."

"Crying?"

"Yeah. Because the way Debbie looked at her daddy, and the way he looked at her. I wish-" Trina's voice broke a little and she cleared her throat. After a brief pause, Cat heard what sounded like a glass clinking on the counter. "Sorry, had to take a drink of water."

"It's fine. You were saying?"

"I wished that my own father could have been like that. Could have had _that_ look in his eyes instead of that of some madman." Cat frowned and slowly nodded, hanging on to each word. "I swear to god Madison must have thought I was nuts."

"You said your mom told her family."

"Only Uncle John and my grandparents. Luke, Peter, Sarah…they don't know. They know _something's _wrong, they just don't know what." There was another paused, followed once more by the glass of water hitting the table. "I'm glad the town is so nearby. Mom, Tori and I are actually willing to see our therapists, so they can manage to drive here. Then, I can visit whenever, and vice versa."

"Plus! You being here means you get to see Jason." Cat smirked as Trina laughed. "And no, I'm not going to stop. You bring him up so often it's not even funny. Plus it was cute the other day, babysitting little Tricia, her asking you if you had anyone you were dating."

"Oh come on."

"You were red as a beet when you said you didn't and she told you that she was surprised because you were so pretty." The little girl had also said she wanted to be pretty like Trina one day and have a cute boy fall in love with her and be her prince. When that came out, Trina's face looked as though all the blood in her body suddenly migrated to her head.

"Yeah but I'm not all that pretty."

"You are too, and don't deny it."

"If it's alright with you, I think I'm going to deny it." She heard the girl laugh, so she didn't continue. "Sorry I won't get to be there the next couple of days to help out with the babysitting."

"That's alright, I've managed to rope Jade into helping."

"Oh wow. That ought to be entertaining."

Cat threw her head back, roaring with laughter at the thought of Jade helping out with the twins they had to babysit in the next couple of days. "Oh it'll be entertaining." They weren't the same twins that she used to prank Sam some time ago, but she had a thought of using these to prank Jade. "You know, we know for a fact Jade doesn't have a twin…" She ran her fingers over her chin and wagged her eyebrows.

"I know that voice. You're scheming, aren't you."

"You know it, Trina. Did I ever tell you what went down with Sam some time ago?"

"No, what?"

"I tricked her with a couple twins we were babysitting. Didn't know she had a twin sister-so she got her sister to come to Los Angeles. They got me back big time." Her eyelids fell halfway while Trina broke out laughing. "To this day I haven't figured a way to get her back for it, but the prank war is still afoot. Once I figure something out."

"Well good luck with that."

"Hey." She squinted at the phone and crossed her arms. "She's your therapist now, isn't she? Don't go telling her I'm cooking up a plan." Trina laughed again, a sound that still was melodious to her ears. Joy, this was what she liked hearing from her friends, especially Tori and Trina, after everything they went through.

"My lips are sealed, Cat. Just be careful she doesn't top your next prank with something even bigger." Cat's eyebrows moved inward, then her right brow drifted into the air. "Just because she's working hard as a therapist and building up her clientele, don't think for a second that means she's not ready to throw in another prank. I have a feeling she'll always be up for that."

"Possibly. I'll consider it."

"Yeah…One more thing, I just want to ask your opinion on this. Or a couple thoughts, really."

"Shoot."

"This whole thing with Dad-what do you think I should do?"

"Let yourself heal." She honestly didn't think they could heal if he remained in their lives, but she wasn't a therapist, nor was she about to say something that she may end up regretting. "Just be careful. I mean, your mother's doing what she can to keep you girls safe, now, and she's taken you away from him. If you think he has any business in your life down the road…That's up to you."

"That's just it. I don't." She took a deep breath and paused once more. Trina's voice wavered for a moment when she spoke again. "He…He hurt me, Cat. He hurt Tori. Wrecked our lives, destroyed us. He destroyed two perfectly normal little girls, Cat. We should have had happy childhoods, happy lives-instead we-no. No, I don't want anything more to do with him. I don't have to hate him, but I don't have to want any part of his life."

"You need to do what you feel is best for yourself, for your recovery. Follow what's in your heart." She was angry at Mr. Vega, the hate she felt for the man was something she'd been struggling with since she found out what kind of man he was. As difficult as it was, she tried her best not to let that fester or rub off onto Trina or Tori. "Remember that I'll always be here for you and your sister. Jade, Beck and Andre will too, even though they don't know."

"And they won't! I don't want them knowing what kind of _monster_-Tori didn't even want you to know. I let it slip out, I was emotional and it just came out."

"That is also your decision. As well as hers, on who if anyone you ever tell. Now, what was that other thing you wanted to ask?"

"Jason. What would-what would be a good thing to do with him?" She was pleased to hear Trina considering actually doing something with him. It would be a while before the girl was ready to trust him, and likely she was going to need to spend some time with him in places that were comfortable for her.

"Do only what is comfortable to you, he'll understand if he's waited this long and understood as much as he has. Probably stick to public venues until you're ready to be alone with him. He should respect that."

"Right. That's what I was thinking."

"Do you think you're ready to really hang out with him?"

"I…I think so. I'm nervous, but I do want to be with him. I'll muddle over it for the next couple of days, call him whenever I get back into town."

"Sounds good, sounds like a plan. Just remember, Trina. One thing at a time, one step at a time. You're with your mom's family now, so enjoy your time there."

"I will. Thank you, Cat."

* * *

><p>Good phone conversation.<p> 


	34. A Brother's Wrath

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 34 (A Brother's Wrath)<p>

David growled as he dug through his paperwork, throwing various files aside. "Trash, trash, trash…" His entire life's work was devoted to a job where people trusted him, respected him. He was a man of dignity, who commanded respect, but when he looked into the mirror that was not what he saw.

No, what he saw was a man with boils all along his body and skin that was melting off to the bone. His face was a skull, staring back and laughing at him. "Mr. Vega?" A woman's voice snapped him out of his mundane routine of throwing away paperwork. His eyes darted to the door where his secretary stood. "You have a man here to see you."

A scowl etched onto his face as anger and bitterness slammed his chest. "Does he have an appointment?" There wasn't anyone he wished to see now, and felt as though he should simply throw out anyone that bothered him. Yet, he had to maintain somewhat of a peaceful image.

The lady shifted her glasses up and looked to the appointment book in her hand. "I don't think so, but you aren't booked right now." His face grew long and ashen, but he dismissed the feeling of ignoring this person. How was he to know if this matter wasn't important?

"Then send him in." He took his seat and kicked his heels up on the corner of his desk. His eyes peered onto a framed photo of his daughters when they were children. _"The hell do I keep this picture for?" _Disgust shrouded him and he instantly kicked the frame off the desk and into the trash bin where it met with a shattering sound.

His eyes moved to the door where a tall, well-built man entered. This man cast a shadow that appeared to stretch onto him like a ghost, ready to strangle him. The man's grey moustache flew wildly beneath his flaring nostrils, and his salt and pepper colored hair was a mess.

Still he was neatly dressed in a suit and tie. The first thing about this man he noticed, aside from the vague familiarity of his appearance was the bible he clutched in his heavy, hair covered hand. "What are you supposed to be, a preacher of some sort?"

"Pastor. John's the name." The man's bushy eyebrows sank into his eyes and a wrinkle formed between them. "Today, it's just John. Not Pastor."

"Yeah, okay." David moved his hands behind his head and shrugged. "So what do you want? Do you need to discuss a case, are you here to pray?"

"I've done my share of praying today. I wanted to get a good look at you, and give you a good look at me." The man's nose wrinkled and his eyes grew narrow. "Do you recognize me, _Chief_?" David dropped his feet to the ground and he waved his hand in the air.

"No. Should I?"

"We were close once. I trusted you, and that takes a lot."

"I'm sorry, I have no idea who you are." David stood up and extended a hand. "But it is good to meet you. If there's anything you need, I'll be happy to help." The man stared at his hand like it was a disease.

"Just where have those hands been, David? What have they…touched?" The last word of the man's sentence rolled off his tongue with a cloud of bitterness and anger. David withdrew his hand and raised an eyebrow at the stranger.

"Excuse me?" John stared into David's eyes with a cold expression. The anger in his gaze was frightening. "Should you look so angry for a pastor? I mean, come on."

"I told you, I'm not a pastor today. Unlike you, I know what I'm doing."

"What are you trying to say?" John's gaze drifted to the trashcan. David twisted himself to look and furrowed his brow at the cracked photograph. "Those are, uh…my daughters. They're grown now."

When he turned to look, the man was gone. Sweat trickled down the side of his face as the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. "The fuck was that all about?" He could feel the tension in the air rising up, choking him with a deadly vice grip.

The presence of the man could still be felt like that of a ghost, and for a second, that's what David thought it was. "Best I ignore it."

That evening he went to the bar for a glass of whiskey, ordering a bottle along with a glass full of ice. The nightmares he'd been having had grown worse lately, which was why he thought so little of his mysterious visitor from earlier.

He turned his eyes to his reflection in the mirror and frowned as the image started to twist and distort. His eyes grew large and black like pits, and his messy hair twisted into thick black horns.

"Fuck. I already know I'm a fucking demon." Rather than pour the whiskey into the glass, he put the bottle to his lips and started drinking. There wasn't a soul around but the bartender at the end, cleaning up some glasses, so what did he care if he looked like a drunken fool?

"You know what the good book says about alcoholism?" David froze as the familiar voice burst his eardrums. Holding the bottle in place he glanced at the mirror to see John standing next to him. "Like anything, too much can destroy us."

"What do you want from me? Do you wish for my death?"

"No. I'm no killer." John put his hand beneath the bottle and pushed it upwards. David let out a yell as the whiskey poured from the bottle and splashed out into his mouth and down his body like a fountain. He sputtered as the liquid drenched his clothing. "I'm surprised you don't recognize me still, David."

"Are you some ghost? Some demon or spirit that's haunting me?"

"Funny." The large man released a dry chuckle and pulled the bottle away from him. "Why is it you never displayed his problem before?"

"Who the fuck are you?" His voice slurred and he vigorously rubbed his eyes, trying to get the burning alcohol out.

"Let's see if you remember this phrase." John leaned next to him and whispered in his ear. "You don't want to piss off Big John." David pulled away from him with a loud scoff and grabbed a napkin, using it to clean himself off.

"No I don't know the phrase."

"I see." John helped him off the stool and closed his eyes. "Come, I'll drive you to your house. You seem to be close to drunk."

"Oh fuck, I probably am." He stumbled to the right and groaned. "I hate when I get drunk, it makes me do things. Things I shouldn't do, things a good father should never…Tell me, Preacher, are you catholic?"

"No." John led him out to his car and took the keys. David climbed into the passenger seat and moaned as the alcohol started to work its way through his system. "I'm protestant. Like I said, tonight I am no preacher."

"Right, right, whatever. Look, don't be mysterious-okay?"

"Oh I'm not trying to be. You're the one that doesn't recognize me." He squinted at the man, but only saw flashes of light. "Strange, considering how often we hung out. Would have had to be a lot because, well, I gave you my blessing." John chuckled sadly and shook his head. "Can you believe it? _I_ gave you _my_ blessing, and you pulled the wool over my eyes."

"What are you talking about?"

"Think about it and maybe it'll come to you."

"No, you're making no sense. I don't even know you! I swear! I feel like I've seen you somewhere, but I would recognize you."

"Uh huh." He found himself being guided into his home where he had a sudden desire to find his wife or daughters. When he called out for them, he remembered they weren't there. "They're safe. In Cholem."

"What? That's where Holly's family is."

"Yes, and if you know what's good for you, you won't step foot there." His head began burning. How much had he drank, he really hadn't paid any attention at the bar.

"Why not? I love my family."

"Oh sure you do. Now…" The man's heavy hand came crashing down onto his shoulder, causing him to jump and scream out as a painful sensation shot through him. "Are you sure you don't recognize me yet? Take a closer look and maybe it'll come to you."

"All I know is you scare me, but then a lot of things scare me lately. Like my nightmares." He tapped his head and chuckled loudly. "That goddamn demon's in my head you know."

"Right." John began to pull back the cuffs of his sleeve. He removed his jacket and tossed it on the coat rack next to the door. David tilted his head as the man cracked his neck from side to side. "I'm going to enjoy this a little too much. God will forgive me, for I know what I'm about to do is wrong-not at all how a man of God should act. Wrath has always been my vice, I know."

"Wait." It was starting to come to him who this man was, but he couldn't think of how it was possible. Holly had not seen her family in well over ten years, so there was no way her brother could know a thing about him.

"You see David, I don't trust easily. I got in trouble in high school for beating up a punk that looked at my little sister the wrong way." David's eyes widened as the man smacked him on the shoulder once again and looked down into his eyes. "The man that ends up with my sister, I vowed I would get to know him and I would have to believe he's a good match for her. That he'll take care of her, treat her and her children right. You made me believe you were that man-but you had us fooled."

"Wait, you don't understand. I never meant."

"Save it." John bared his teeth, then slammed David harshly against the wall. The injury from the golf club was still present, so when he hit the wall, he was struck by an extra wave of pain. "'If you ever do anything to hurt her, I'll hunt you down. I'll find you, and I'll kick your ass.' Do you remember me telling you that, David? You didn't take me seriously, I guess. Son of a preacher. Well I hope you know what you've gotten yourself into."

David screamed as he felt himself flying through the air and crashing into the fireplace nearby. He grabbed his arm, screaming in pain as the man's shadow fell on him. "This isn't real! It can't be real! Holly wouldn't have gone back to her family!"

"Because you wouldn't let her, no doubt." John grabbed him by the throat and pulled him up. David grabbed at his arm, whimpering as the man's nostrils flared and his eyes darkened. "My nieces, I've only met them once when they were too little to remember me. Sweet, innocent, fragile…and you. The devil my little sister brought home. Helped in their birth, but corrupted them-robbed them of their innocence. I-I couldn't protect them, I didn't know. I couldn't protect my sister because I didn't know!"

"No, please!" David let out another scream as swift jab was thrust into his abdomen. He felt his stomach lurch upwards and his heart slam into his chest.

"Your own daughters! Your own children!"

"Oh god, please."

"How often did my sister plead? How often did my nieces plead? Did you hear them? Did you!" John's voice rose and another blow struck David in his chest, crushing him it seemed. He gasped for air, but found himself struggling.

"For ten years I prayed. I prayed she was well, that her children were well. Ten years I prayed they had a good, decent life, and you betrayed that! I trusted my sister to you, and you betrayed it!" Another strike came at his side, then he was thrown again into the wall.

When he looked up, John was hunched over him, scowling and glaring with a burning fire in his eyes.

The man's shirt was covered in sweat, and his chest heaved forth with successive heavy breaths.

"I should break you for what you've done, but like I said before, I'm not a killer. As much as I'd like to see you put in the ground…" John bared his teeth and narrowed his eyes. "I'm not going to do that to my sister, to my nieces. No matter how much pain you caused them, they wouldn't want to see you murdered for their sake, in their name. You're not worth it, anyway."

David trembled and began whimpering as John straightened himself. The man snarled, then delivered a powerful kick into David's jaw. Blood spewed from his mouth, and he could feel an old crown come loose inside his mouth. John then struck him in the face with the downward slice of his elbow. Feeling a crack in his nose, David threw his hand to his face, moaning as blood bubbled between his fingers. Tears welled up in his eyes as John reached down and clutched his face with one hand.

"If you _ever_ come around those girls again-so much as look at them-I will break you. I won't kill you, but you'll wish I had."

"Fuck you! What makes you think you're so righteous!"

"When did I say that?" John shoved David's head back against the wall, then pushed his foot down onto his throat. He gasped for air and grabbed John's foot, shaking as his face slowly changed color. "I know what I'm doing right now is wrong, David. Did you know what you were doing was wrong at the time?"

"N-No. No! I couldn't control myself. I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" John removed his foot and growled as he began to sob. His hands moved up over his eyes and his legs curled upwards into a ball. "I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me. I'm a terrible person, I'm rotten. I'm horrible. I'm a demon, a monster. You're a preacher, you shouldn't-shouldn't do this."

"Look who's talking, scumbag." John crouched in front of him and narrowed his eyes. "I'm a brother and an uncle before I'm a pastor. Maybe I'm wrong to think like that, especially when you're supposed to put god first in your life."

David lowered his hands, whimpering as blood drenched his face and his hands. "Y-You…"

"I'm also a grandfather of a three year old little girl." David watched the man remove a photo from his wallet and show it to him. The child in the picture had an open, laughing smile, and bright blue eyes. Her sandy brown hair was in curls around her neck, and she wore a soft green dress. "She's beautiful, means the world to me. Innocent, sweet, kind, and is her father's pride and joy."

"O-Okay?"

"I could never rob her of her innocence the way you did your children." John sneered as he returned the picture to his wallet.

"I loved my daughters."

"Sure. You know, I do love my child, and that's a genuine father's love for his daughter. You? You've got some sick, twisted mind." John's eyebrows rose and a sudden scoff fled his lips. "I don't think myself higher than anyone else, I don't think myself better. I'm human, and I make mistakes. Like all, I fall short of the glory of God, and my greatest sin is my anger. Which, mind you, I have _never_ turned on my own family. I've never committed a sin against my wife, my children or granddaughter, my parents…and that is where you and I differ."

David tried to look away, but John grabbed his face and twisted his head back into place, forcing him to look into his eyes. "Please, I'm in pain. I'm bleeding."

"Yeah, well, you know what? For the first time, I am not sympathetic." John's eyes narrowed and he removed his hand, chuckling darkly. "I'm not looking in the eyes of a human who has made mistakes. I just wanted to get a glimpse, to see what I missed over twenty years ago…evil. I'm looking into the eyes of a monster. A demon. I won't be your judge, it's not my place."

"O-O-Only God judges, right?"

"Right enough." John stood up and dusted his slacks off. "But so do the judges of the courtroom, of whom I hope you meet one day." John let out a sigh and shook his head in dismay. "I can't complain. Seeing my nieces, they are the light in their mothers' eyes. How someone so evil as you helped contribute to two remarkable little girls like that, I don't know. So thank you, David."

He shielded his face with his trembling hands, begging that John leave him. "What?" John grabbed his jacket from the coat rack and turned his back to him. "What do you mean 'thank you'?"

"You are a glorified sperm donor, David. You've given my little sister two angels, more precious and worthy of the love of a family than you could ever hope to be." John made his way to the door and glanced over his shoulder. "Remember, David, don't you get any ideas and come looking to my sister. I don't want to see your face or hear about your presence anywhere near my baby sister or her daughters. If need be _I_ am the restraining order."

Tears and blood mixed together and pooled on the floor beneath his head. After he left, David crawled towards his phone on the coffee table and dialed Gary's number, hoping the man would come and help him.

When he answered, there was a bitter and exhausted tone in his voice. "What do you want, David?"

"Help." David's voice held a rasp to it and he moved his hand up to his throat, whimpering as he struggled to speak. "I was attacked."

"You don't say. Are you okay? You need an ambulance?"

"No. I'm just a little beaten up. I'll be fine, I just…I think I need someone to talk to."

"Do I need to fill out a police report?"

"N-No." There was no reason to do so, it wasn't as though they'd believe him. Or they would, considering his status, but still reporting it meant he'd have to explain why it happened. The man's motive. If he explained that, it meant revealing what he'd done, and he couldn't do that.

"And you don't need a doctor?"

"No, I think I'm fine."

"I see…Well. Wash your wounds with alcohol then." Gary laughed once, then hung up the phone. David whined and curled into a ball, defeated. As he lay there, hours passed with no sign of Gary, or anyone else that would possibly help his damaged ego.

Wherever he'd gone wrong, he didn't know, but if this was to be his punishment, he truly felt deserving of it.

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><p>I felt like putting this up a bit early for you.<p> 


	35. In a Good Place

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: I post today's update now with an announcement. I have finished writing Red Light, there is a total of 46 chapters. The epilogue does _not _feature Sam, simply because she has her epilogue at the end of the first Red Light. Instead it may feature a bit of a legacy left. The final chapter will be Trina, whose epilogue takes place around the same time frame as Sam's. Anyway, read on with this chapter. Not often does the daily update get posted in the morning.

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><p>Chapter 35 (In a Good Place)<p>

"Higher. I want to go higher!" The young girl laughed as Trina pushed her on the swing. Trina grabbed onto the yellow ropes and looked down as Debbie glanced up at her, grinning from ear to ear. "You've got to push me higher."

"But I don't want you to fall off the swing." The girl grasped the ropes firmly and a determined look swept over her face.

"I won't fall. I got this, big tree." Trina laughed at the nickname. It reminded her of the nickname Tori used to give her, but that was because Tori liked how it sounded like a bird tweeting.

"Okay, but if you fall off, I'm going to have to explain to your dad why you're mad at me."

"I wouldn't be mad. I won't fall!" Trina was happy to oblige. She took a few steps back, holding the lower end of the swing. She released the ropes, then gave it a strong push. The young girl's laugh was somewhat maniacal as she kicked her legs forward and let the swing take her flying into the air. "Yay!"

She had to step out of the way as the swing came back towards her. Debbie's joy was infectious, but it brought a tear to her eye and stirred up her emotions. This girl would have a happy life, she'd grow up with a good home and a good family, and dare she to think that Debbie would grow up with a good father as well.

"This town seems too small for you," someone stated simply. Trina looked over to see her cousin walking towards her. Luke was a tall man like his father, and built like him too. It was a surprise that Peter wasn't built like an ox as his dad and brother. "You're like Peter, yearning to get back into the city."

"Well I have, or had, a lot of business there. I'm just not used to a small town." She had to go back and spend time with Cat, as shocked as she was. It had been some time since she solicited herself on the streets, but those times still brought memories that haunted her and reminded her how unclean she felt. "There are a couple people left in the city I have to get back to."

"Aunt Holly and Tori are sticking around here." Luke looked to his daughter with a smile as the girl hopped off the swing and ran for him. Trina's heart skipped a beat as the man scooped up his child and let her hug his neck. "We all would be happy to have you around."

"I'd love to stay but I do have commitments back home." She was startled to think that she valued her commitment to her newfound friendship with Cat over that of her old job. She enjoyed it more, though, and didn't feel disgusted with herself every night she went to bed.

"I suppose that is fair. Deborah is fond of you already, cuz." He chuckled as the girl nodded excitedly. "Amazing for how shy she is." Trina was in awe of the young girl. She reached over and rubbed Debbie's head, causing the child to laugh.

"Almost wish I was as happy as she was when I was around her age." She glanced to the right and saw Tori sneaking around the corner of the house with Sarah. "Hey Tori, where are you heading?" Tori poked her head around the corner and extended her hand, revealing a fishing rod.

"Sarah and I are going to the lake!" Trina jerked her head back and parted her lips. She never thought Tori would be interested in fishing, but in this day and age nothing surprised her.

As Tori retreated around the corner once more, Luke let out a laugh. "Those fishing rods aren't used for fishing anymore." Trina raised an eyebrow and slid her hands down to her hips. "Too old. Sarah takes some fencing lessons, she likes to take her friends down to the lake and give them a lesson in fencing." She closed her eyes and stifled an amused chuckle.

"And she roped Tori into a free lesson? That makes sense." She let out an exhale and scratched at the back of her neck. "It'll actually be kind of hard being so far away from her-even if it is only half an hour. I can't watch her, but then, dad won't be able to do anything."

"Yeah." Luke tensed and his eyes grew heavy. "I don't know exactly what he did to you girls, he sounds like some kind of monster. He won't be able to hurt anyone here, so don't you worry."

"I'm not too worried, Lucas. It's good to know Mom and Tori are in good hands."

"Yep." A cheery expression returned to his face and he motioned to a large truck in the distance. "Looks like dad's back." Trina swept her hand through her hair and looked off with excitement. "And he brought that guy you've been going on about, I see."

"Jason." Trina spoke with him over the phone and told him how she wanted to see him again but in the presence of her family. He agreed, then John insisted that he go and pick the man up.

In her excitement, she wound up telling her cousin Luke almost everything there was to tell. Minus the parts which were more intimate for her. Of course, her cousin was eager to meet her and seemed to have the same protective look of his father. At least, it was what Holly said, and it felt nice to know she too may have a relative looking out for her.

As the truck, a Dodge Ram came to a stop, she saw her uncle place a mighty hand to Jason's shoulder. Grabbing his attention, John spoke something and Jason nodded with respect.

Luke set his daughter down to let her run off to the house, then he walked over to the truck and leaned sideways against the hood. Seeing where this was headed, Trina brought her hand to her forehead and felt a rush of blood to her cheeks.

It was not long before Jason was out of the car and making his way toward her. "There's not much that frightens me as a marine," he began. Trina looked up with a tiny smile and raised her shoulders as he poked his thumb to Luke and John, now watching from a distance. "But your uncle and cousin? Damn."

"Would you believe Uncle John is a pastor?"

"He must have been into wrestling or something in high school."

"Boxing and weightlifting."

"Je-I shouldn't curse here, should I?"

Trina waved her hand in the air and flashed a toothy grin. "It doesn't matter." It did, but she didn't curse in front of her mom's relatives. "I don't curse in front of my grandparents or my uncle's family, but they understand it's human nature. They won't mind if one or two words slip out, just don't do it frequently or on purpose and you're fine."

"I would be afraid to get into a rumble with him. Fifty years old and he looks like he could take two of my military buddies out." Trina wasn't sure that her uncle hadn't been in the military at some point, she hadn't asked. He wouldn't have been old enough for Vietnam, as he wasn't even sixteen until 1980.

"He's really nice though. Mom says he wouldn't hurt a fly unless that fly hurt his family-then he might go buck wild." Trina coughed into her hand as Jason looked to her with an amused gaze. "Her words, not mine."

"Well that's one thing he admitted on the drive here, that he does have issues with anger when it comes to people messing around with his family." Jason locked his wrists behind his back and walked with Trina to the edge of the yard. "It's great to see you, Trina. I've missed you."

"So have I." Her chest trembled as fear surrounded her. She wanted to tell him about the things she did, but she couldn't. "I…really want to be with you, it's just, it's going to take some time." She turned to him and reached forward, taking his hand in hers. "Be patient with me?"

His smile warmed her soul and helped her to relax while his eyes drew her in. "Of course, Trina. You know you can trust me." Her heart skipped a beat as the sensation from holding his hand created a series of sparks shooting up her arm and electrifying her trembling heart.

"I don't want you to hate me, I don't want you to turn away from me, and I'm really scared, Jason." She took a deep breath and looked towards the house. "That time we were together-I wanted to feel it again. I wanted to try and recreate-" Her voice broke and the tears that grew finally broke over her cheekbones. Jason furrowed his brow as she pulled her hand slightly away but kept her fingers curled around his palm. "I didn't understand what I felt when I was with you, and I still don't. Even now…I don't feel this way with anybody-yet I haven't even seen you in god knows how long."

Jason studied her, holding her gaze for what felt like an eternity. Her eyebrows curled together and rose in the middle as he moved his hand up and caressed her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned into it, feeling a spark of life that drew her blood to the pressure where his hand made contact.

"I see in your eyes you want to say something. I've waited this long to see you to be with you, and I can wait as long as I have to. You can tell me anything, I won't run, I won't think any less of you." She opened her eyes partially and curved her lips up. "As I said then, I'll say it now. I do love you, I love you still, and I'm not going to hurt you."

Her heart jumped to her throat and her body started to tremble. "Why is it that word, when I hear it from you, it means something?" She'd heard it thrown about so many times. Mostly by drunken men who didn't know better, so she put it off as a word with an empty meaning. No emotions or feelings attached.

Yet when it came from him, there was a depth that she couldn't quite grasp. "Because I mean it when I say it. I don't talk with empty words." She held her breath, studying his eyes to admire the honesty they presented.

As she looked down to the uniform she wore, she couldn't help but to wonder his commitment to the military. "My friend-therapist is in the military. She says normally there's a four year commitment, though she's in this program where she's allowed to focus on college without military constraints. What about you?"

"That's true." He folded his arms across his chest and arched his eyebrows momentarily. "My four year commitment has passed at this point. Still if I am needed, I will go in."

"Right now?"

"I find that I'm needed here." Her heart leapt once again and her already present blush continued to grow as his lips curved into a handsome smirk. "I want you to know, I don't expect to rush and I don't intend to. If you'd like to date, I'm more than willing to take it slow."

"I appreciate that. I do." She let her eyes drop momentarily, trying to remember the apartment building he said he was in. She'd been there once, but it was while 'working'. She didn't know if he was there at the time, but thinking that he could have been was a horrible fear to imagine. "There is something I want to talk to you about, but-I'm not ready."

"I'll be here for you when you are."

"Thank you." She cleared her throat and was quick to push her anxieties from her mind. "Enough about this. Let's go inside and have dinner." At the house, she saw her mother standing on the porch. Holly was watching on with a smile and a glint of joy and admiration in her eyes. Trina wasn't sure why, but it was nice to see. "I think my mom might even have some questions for you."

"Really now?" He looked over his shoulder and chuckled nervously. "Why?"

"She knows a little about us. Hasn't met you yet." She smacked his chest playfully and took his hand, pulling it with her towards the house. "Don't be so nervous, she won't bite. Not like Uncle John, anyway."

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><p>So a little bit of goodness. Oh, and for your information, yes the events of last chapter actually happened<p> 


	36. Progress

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

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><p>Chapter 36 (Progress)<p>

"Amazed as I am by this request, I'm happy because it shows progress." Sam wanted to celebrate with loud proclaim, for in her office were both sisters and their mother. They'd agreed to having a joint session with all of them, and Sam was going to let them get out whatever they needed.

Alice sat beside her, looking at the family with the same pride. "I'm glad you took our advice and went to see your family, Holly." Holly's cheeks reddened as her daughters looked up at her. "And they accepted you without question, did they not?" Alice looked to be pleased with herself, and Sam could understand it. She was satisfied too because the women were taking the steps they needed to make in order to recover.

It would be a long process, but so long as they were willing to take the necessary steps, they could make it. The one thing that still surprised her, but she was happy to see, was that Holly took Tori and got away from her husband all on her own without suggestion.

"Has there been any further interaction with David?" It was a hard question to ask them at this point, but it was a necessary one.

"No there hasn't," Holly responded, "Since leaving the house, I haven't made any attempt to contact him. He has tried calling, but I don't answer." Sam nodded respectfully and turned to the daughters.

"Mom convinced me to delete and block his number," Tori remarked with a heavy sigh. "I…It was foolish of me to think there was any hope in Dad." Sam rolled her head to the right and glanced at Alice. In this session, Alice was letting her lead, a mark on how much she'd been learning. The women were not her only clients, of course.

"Why?" Sam reclined and curled a finger over her chin while watching Tori's reaction. The young girl hunched forward and dipped her eyes down. "What makes you think it's foolish?" Trina and Holly looked at her with concern, but said nothing, to allow her a chance to explain.

"Because I've always been the naïve one. I've always believed there's good in everyone. I'm the one that tries to be optimistic-and of course I'm the one that wanted my family to be together." Tori's hands closed tight and the veins rose to the surface of them. "The last time I saw dad was that night when he looked at me, the way he did was just…" Tori gagged on her words and closed her eyes. "I can't. I can't believe how _stupid_ I was to think that he could change! That he could get better!"

"He's your father," Holly said with a gentle repose. Tori's eyelids opened halfway and a whimper left her lips. "It's neither stupid or foolish of you to want, hope, or think that your own dad could get better or change. I know. I wanted that so much for years…but over the years I just saw a man that was sinking deeper and deeper."

"Then why?" Tori shot her a look as her eyes grew misty. "Why did you do nothing, mama?" Holly's muscles appeared to tense while Trina turned her head away. "Every time-" Tori's nostrils spread apart and her lips trembled as she fought back a sob. "Every time he'd come into our rooms, every time we cried out for you to do something, why? Why did you do _nothing?"_

"Because I didn't know what to do." Tori's face sank as Holly's hands trembled on her knees and fresh tears streamed down the woman's face. "I knew I was supposed to protect you, to protect my babies-but I didn't know how to protect you against a man that should never hurt you. I was scared, too scared-confused. I trusted that man, I-I cared for that man. How could I fathom what kind of monster would hurt his own daughters? I know I should have taken you two and ran a long time ago…I thought he'd find us, I couldn't picture escaping from him and actually succeeding. I couldn't stop him, I didn't even know how."

Holly moved her hand up over her eyes, trying to cover up her own tears as her daughters watched her. "I know what you must think of me, or how horrible of a mother I am." She took a deep breath, which trembled with her chest. "And I could say 'I'm sorry' a million times and it would never be enough."

Tori bowed her head and Trina's eyelids tightened over her eyes. "You took Tori and you got out," Trina replied with a difficult groan. "You got away from Dad. As late as it was, it's a start. So is actually taking us to see your family-our family." Tori rubbed her fingertips together for several seconds, then leaned sideways against her mother.

"And we don't hate you." Holly's breath hitched as her daughter rubbed against her and set her head onto her shoulder. "We're just-well I don't know how Trina thinks but I know how I feel. I'm just angry and hurt that it took this long." Trina smiled sadly and reached across Holly to squeeze Tori's hand.

"I know how that feels, sis."

"And don't think I hate Gary either. I can't tell you how many times I wished you would leave Dad for him. Though in a way that wasn't…cheap." Holly wiped her eyes with the bottom of her palm and chuckled through her tears. "You're our mom, and you want to protect us-I know. I guess I can understand being afraid of dad…"

Holly took her daughters by the hand, squeezing gently while sniffling as she looked to the tears on their faces. "I love you both very much. You're my babies, my angels, and I promise you…I'm never going to let that monster hurt you again."

Sam watched the women hug each other, realizing that sometimes just the presence of a therapist was all that may be needed to get two or more people to communicate. It was just the simple fact that the counselor served as a referee, giving the people the feeling of security to be open and say what was needed without fearing too much retaliation.

"Tell me," Sam began as the three broke from the hug, "What are your plans now that you've gone to see your family? I know you mentioned their offer to have you move in and stay with them."

"That's correct." Holly grabbed a tissue and dried her eyes with it. "My dad wants us to stay with him. We can still come in for therapy once a week or so, joint session or individual, so it's not a big problem."

"I think it could be good for you. They sound like good people to aid in your recovery process."

"There's still a lot to think about. All Tori's friends are here, and Trina still plans to stay on as Cat's roommate. Understandably it's only twenty minutes of a drive, but still might be out of the way for Tori to see her friends or even her sister."

These were good points that Holly had, and she needed to consider them along with all other points. "Here's what I would like for you to do, then." Holly leaned forward a bit, staring back at Sam eagerly. "I'd like for you, and for both of you girls to write out a list of pros and cons in this decision-making process."

"You think it'll help?"

"Sure. Whenever you make a decision that is a major one, it's always good to weigh the benefits alongside the negatives. Then once you have done that, go over the list again to consider each point you've made. Once you feel ready to make your decision, follow the gut instinct that comes to mind." Sam took a pause and moved her eyes from Holly to her daughters. "Of course, all of you should make that decision together."

Tori's face scrunched and she pointed over to her sister. "Even though Trina's staying with Cat?" Sam closed her eyes and put forth a brief smile.

"Yes. She is a part of the family, and that decision would affect her as well." Sam reclined and brought her hands together, tapping her fingertips against one another. "I do feel I need to ask, does David have any knowledge about where Cat lives?"

"No," Trina replied. Sam didn't think he would, but she couldn't be certain. Not to mention, it was Nona's name that still listed, so it wouldn't be as easy for David to search Trina's name and find the address. "I don't think he's even aware that I've moved in with Cat."

"Alright, that is good news." Normally she would suggest they try and work things out with the man, but after some consideration and advice from Alice, she came to the conclusion that this would not be the best route to take. The three women needed to heal, to recover, and they could not do that if David remained an issue for them. "Now I need to ask you three, is there any part of you that wants to work on maintaining any kind of interaction or relation with your father?"

It would be different if they wanted to hang on. She couldn't tell them exactly what to do, only what she thought might be the best route to take. If they wanted to pursue some kind of connection with the man, it was their choice.

Holly frowned as her daughters exchanged uncertain glances. Their mother drew in a strong breath and grasped tight her jeans. "My father wants me to pursue a divorce." Sam's eyebrows rose and a surprised hum vibrated from her lips. "My parents, and my brother, were horrified when I told them what kind of monster he became. Almost immediately the urged me to divorce him and focus on repairing a relationship with my girls."

"How do you feel about that?"

"I…" Holly's eyelids fell shut and she released her breath. "I think they're right. I don't see how I can pursue a relationship with David when I can't even trust the man. Knowing my parents, knowing how against divorce they've always been, to have them _urge_ me to divorce him-"

"You would then feel that their opinion is correct?"

"Yeah." Holly shrugged and shook her head gently from side to side. "I can't speak for my daughters, because this man is their father, but I know that for me personally…I don't want anything more to do with him. If it wasn't for his status as their father, I'd do everything I could to keep him away from my girls."

"He won't change," Tori whispered, "I don't thinks so. For the first time, I don't feel hopeful or optimistic at all. I feel afraid of him, frightened and anxious. Like I did that night, I feel like I want to run-that I need to run away from him." Tori scratched at her forehead as it tensed beneath her nails. "I still have nightmares that he's there, doing things-saying things…I can't move, I can't get away because he's my dad. He should be protecting me, but he's…no…"

Trina reached around and took Tori's hand, causing the girl to take pause and look to her sister with a sorrowful smile. "It's okay," Trina broke into tears and squeezed the girl's hand. "It's going to be okay. I don't know how, but I feel like things might work out."

"Yeah…" Tori breathed in sharply and turned back to Sam. "So no, I don't want to remain in contact with that man. I can't bring myself to hate him, but I can't forgive either. Can't trust. He didn't just hurt me, you know. He hurt my sister, and he hurt my mother." Tori's breathing increased in speed and her eyes drifted to Holly. "Without even touching her, but forcing her to sit there for years, afraid…he hurt our mom. I don't want anything to do with him."

Trina folded her arms across her chest and shut her eyes. "I agree with Tori." The girl shook her head quickly and uttered a single low grow. "It's hard to even call him 'dad', to be honest with you."

"I think this may be the best route to take," Sam replied carefully, "To work on a relationship between the three of you and heal without him in your lives. It may take a while to understand that yes, he'll always be a part of your past and of your memory, but you can move on. You can move forward, and you can heal."

Sam turned to the sound of a scoff and raised her eyebrows at Trina. "To think that I'll have to see that man's face any time I turn on the local news. How can we escape him even if he's not a part of our lives?"

"It's hard at first, and it will hurt-very much like tearing a bandaid from your skin. For times like that, when you may see him if you're watching the news, change the channel. Know that while avoiding and pretending the past isn't there is a bad thing to do, you might for a time need to avoid anything that is associated with him. Anything that could trigger flashbacks, painful memories. Those will come, they will happen, so don't be afraid of them and don't try to avoid them. Let it work its way out."

"What happens when they come?"

"Take deep breaths, try to focus on something-anything to take your mind off." She knew the routine well from her own experiences. Eventually they stop, but never permanently. "There are still things that trigger flashbacks for me, but the impact is less because I've found ways to get through them-and so will all of you. It takes time, but be there for each other and work through this, and you'll make it."

Tori ripped out a shuddering breath and turned down her head. "What if it never gets better?"

"It will one day. You just have to work on it."

"I will. I think all of us will."

* * *

><p>The first joint session with all three, and I'd say it went well.<p> 


	37. Trina's Growth

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 37 (Trina's Growth)<p>

"I don't know. I wouldn't mind being a dietician." Trina kicked her heels up on Sam's couch and laid back while placing her hands over her abdomen. Sam was amused by the pose, considering it reminded her more of shrinks and less of counselors. "Maybe a fitness person." She paused and smiled at the ceiling above her. "I love babysitting, and spending time with Deborah was fun. Maybe I could run a daycare, or be an elementary teacher. Do you think I could be one?"

"I think you can be whatever you want to be." Trina's cheekbones sank and she quickly sat up, sliding her hands away from her stomach.

"It's been weeks since I've gone out on the streets to sell myself or whatever. What are the chances of someone like me getting a real job?"

"What do you mean someone like you?"

"Former prostitute." Trina's nose wrinkled and her eyes fell onto Sam for an extended time before saying anything else. "I know you were a former porn star, and you're a licensed counselor, so maybe…" Sam smiled at her and lowered her notebook to her lap.

"The thing with that, Trina, the images I have on the internet will forever be out there. My boss knows that I was in that life, Derek's family knows-everyone knows." It didn't haunt her as much, but the reality of it still felt to her like she only got lucky enough to get a real job. "Derek's father was able to get me into the Air Force, and then Alice was nice enough to give me a chance here. Of course, I wouldn't be able to get a job up in Seattle very easily."

"How is that different, though?"

"You weren't on the internet, you didn't put videos of yourself out there for people to see." Sam crossed her legs and turned the chair around so she could slide the notebook onto her desk. "And you were in prostitution for a short time, not many people will know that you were involved in that lifestyle. You won't be required to put it on job or college applications."

"Aren't there places that would have to know that? An extensive background check, maybe?"

"Yes. If you were to get a job at the police department, for instance. They will want to know everything you've been involved in." A sour look came over Trina's face and she quickly shook her head.

"I wouldn't want a job there. Though, I bet Gary could get me a job there if that were the case, our dad made him the Assistant Chief of police. So he's like the top guy next to Dad."

"Still, you say you wouldn't want a job there. How come?"

"Because of my father, obviously. He'd be praised constantly, and I'd constantly have to be reminded of him when I'm at work." It was the reason Sam wouldn't suggest such a job for Trina. The woman needed to have a stress-free work environment, and whether or not David had done the crimes against his family, such a workplace environment could be bad for Trina.

"I think you mentioned daycare worker or elementary teacher, you have a real shot at that."

"I mean I've attended college, I'm close to getting an associate's…so maybe if I work at it, I can get a bachelor's in something. I just don't know what I want to do."

"You do have plenty of time to figure it out, don't rush yourself." Sam crossed her legs and tapped her knee with her nails. Trina swept her hair over her shoulder and leaned forward.

"I don't know. Should I really take a break? I mean I didn't take classes at all this last semester, and my grades have been mostly B's and C's. Jason and Cat both say they'll help me study more, and maybe I can do better."

"I think if you feel like you're up to it, sure. I only suggest taking a break so you can give yourself time to relax with everything that has been going on." Then, sometimes it was helpful to have classes to focus on, to keep the mind preoccupied.

Trina slid her fingers through her hair and perched her head on the palm of her hand while looking off to the window. "I don't know. I think I can do it. If I don't, then I'm just sitting around thinking about how shitty I feel, and that's no good." The girl lowered her hand and lifted her head upright. "I mean, when Cat's not there or we're not doing anything in particular, I'm constantly thinking about all the bad stuff that there is to think about. I can't do that-I don't want to do that."

"That's perfectly fine. I'd say busy your mind, but don't overdo it. You can risk focusing too much on work, then stress yourself out by doing so. There needs to be a healthy balance."

"Yeah. If there's one to be found." Trina closed her eyes. Her fingers curled beside her leg and her foot tapped in an anxious rhythm on the floor. "I really want to talk about Jason." Sam's eyebrows rose and she reclined in her seat.

"Okay, let's talk about him. What is on your mind?" She was aware that Trina had made contact with him and the two had gone on two dates already.

Trina's eyelids drifted upwards and the corners of her mouth curved into a tiny smile. "He's been good to me so far. He hasn't tried to push me into anything, he's been respectful and open-minded." Trina tucked a strand of her hair over her ear and let her smile grow. "I um…I told him, you know. What I'd been doing, and why."

"Oh? How did that go?"

"He's…accepting it." Ignoring the urge to jump up and cheer, Sam remained calm and looked to the woman with a warm smile. Trina's eyes flicked towards Sam and her shoulders rose into the air. "I was so scared, but he stayed so calm, didn't say anything until I was done." Trina moved her right hand over her left and gazed down at it. "He um, he took my hand and told me it was okay. He said he didn't care what I had done, didn't think I was 'dirty' because of it."

"I'm glad to hear this."

"We uh, we talked for hours after that." Trina laughed once and pulled her hand back to her lap. "Went to the beach and walked, just walked. Watched the sunset…" Sam chuckled as Trina's cheeks flushed and a hint of pink swept across her face. "You know how beautiful the beach is on a full moon after an orange sky?"

She pictured the scene in her mind and relaxed as a calm silence swirled about them. With a nod, she glanced to Trina. "I do." It had been some time since she'd gone to the beach, but she could recall how it felt the last time she went. She did stay until dark, just to see what it was like.

The yellow sand had turned a bluish color, and the waves of the ocean shimmered like diamonds beneath the moonlight. Without another soul in sight on the beach, it felt as though she had the entire scene to herself. It made her want to dance, and though she didn't, she had taken off her shoes and ran along the cool sand to feel it squish between her toes.

"It was so serene," Trina marveled with glistening eyes. "I never thought I could share something like that with a man. Then, he's been so good to me that the way I feel…I still don't understand it too much, but I like it. I want to feel it more often." Trina leaned back and rubbed her knees slowly. "I mean, it scares me almost. Do I trust this man? Do I pursue?"

"How do you feel?"

She hugged herself and took in a deep inhale. "Warm." She held the pose for a moment, then released with a dream-like sigh. "I just remember no matter what, when I was a prostitute, another man's presence was only cold. My father was cold. Jason…there's a warmth to his presence, and a look in his eyes that I've never seen any man look at me with. There's no hunger in his eyes, no lust or anything bad to be seen. Just…warmth."

Trina reached up to brush her hair, but stopped with her fingers dipped beneath a few strands. Her brow furrowed and her lower lip tucked beneath her teeth. "Is that-is that love? Is that how a relationship is supposed to be?"

"A relationship doesn't have to be based on sex or instant animal attraction. In a relationship, there should be honesty, trust, respect." Trina lowered her hand and shoulders. Her chest sank and she nodded briefly.

"I've seen the look recently. When we went to spend a few days with grandma and grandpa, they looked at each other with that same look. Even Lucas and Madison, Uncle John and Aunt Beth. What if-what if I can't have that?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm so messed up." Trina put her hands to her chest and her smile swept away from her face. "I find it hard to trust, I don't even know what it's like to love somebody and have a healthy relationship."

"A healthy relationship, and a healthy bond takes time to develop, Trina. You can't know right away, especially not with what you've been through." She turned her eyes to the photo of her and Derek on the desk, then Trina's gaze soon followed. "My fiancé fell in love with me long before I realized what love actually was. I knew I could trust him with certain things, but I was scared to trust him completely because I didn't want to be hurt. Even though I was sure he wouldn't hurt me, I was scared."

"And now?"

"Now it's been three, almost four years. I trust him more, and I know that I love him." Trina smiled as Sam took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "Along the way I've had fears that he might find someone without so many problems, that he might leave me-but he never has. I might have the occasional nightmare that he's no longer there, but when I awake, he is right there beside me, and I know he's not going anywhere."

"So it takes time to develop." Trina drew out a slow exhale and shrugged. "I understand. I don't like it, but I understand."

"Have patience with yourself, Trina. Remember that you're still healing, still recovering. Don't try and figure everything out right away, let things happen naturally." She rubbed her chin as Trina listened eagerly to her. "You have some good people to fall on for learning. Observe your grandparents, observe your aunt and uncle, and even your cousin. Those around you that you know have a healthy relationship, and slowly you'll begin to take it in."

"I see. I think I understand." Their session was interrupted by the sound of a cell phone going off. Trina jumped and looked to the end table beside the couch. "Sorry, I thought I had that turned off!" Sam laughed as Trina grabbed the phone and looked to the caller. "It's Tori, want me to turn it off?"

"No, you can answer it." She'd write down her observations and notes while Trina was on the phone. If Tori was calling while knowing Trina was in an individual session, then it likely had to be an important call.

As she wrote down her notes, she could hear a frantic tone coming from the phone, but no words. Her eyes drifted from the notebook as Trina pulled the phone away and looked towards the small television in the room. "Um, Sam? Can you turn on the news? Tori says it's important."

"Sure." She opened her desk drawer and grabbed the television remote. When she turned the television on, the local news was already the selected channel. Her heart stalled when she saw the urgent breaking news.

_Los Angeles Police Chief in critical condition._

Trina's brow furrowed and she opened her mouth to speak, but held back when the blonde reporter started to speak. "The ambulance was called to the scene of Chief David Vega this morning when a neighbor heard gunshots being fired. When arriving to the scene, Assistant Chief Gary Malone had this to say…"

Footage of Gary appeared, his hair was being blown by the hot wind, and he had an ashen look on his face. "We found multiple gunshot wounds, but at this time we cannot divulge further information regarding the attack. Witnesses say they spotted a tall man with a brown hoodie and pants entering the home. Investigators are on the scene right now, and we can find no evidence of forced entry. For safety concerns we will not reveal the hospital that the Chief has been taken to, he survived his wounds but is in critical care."

"Turn it off," Trina insisted, "Just turn it off." Sam did as asked and met Trina's gaze. She was concerned how Trina felt upon seeing this, and also wished she could ask Tori as well as Holly for their thoughts. Trina brought her hand to her forehead and groaned while clutching her phone tightly with her hand. "Dad's the chief of police, he's got enemies. That's all I can think right now, I don't want to even bother with this."

"I understand, we can discuss that another time if you wish."

"Yeah, for now I just want to think about other things. I know I'd like to see my father suffer, for him to pay for the things he did, but not like that. He doesn't need to die, or maybe he does, I don't know."

Sam pressed her lips together and turned back a page in her notes. "I uh, I did some research, Trina. The state of California's statute of limitations say either you or Tori…if you wished, could file charges against your father."

Trina's nose curled into her face and she spoke with a quiet voice. "No." She lowered her hand and cleared her throat. "No I-that would be too high profile. Los Angeles's police chief? That would be national, I don't want anything more to do with him. I won't take him to court for assault-do you even know what they'd do to me on the stand? No, I won't go through that. I won't have the entire country knowing what my dad did to me, to my sister."

"It's okay. It is your decision." She saw the anxiety in Trina's eyes and opted to not further discuss the possibility of filing charges against David. Trina and Tori were both of the age where if they wished to do so, they could. "I want you to try and get some rest, okay?"

"Cat and I were going to grab a bite to eat, then we have to babysit tonight."

"Sounds like you've got something to keep yourself busy with."

"Yeah…it'll help."

* * *

><p>So David's in the hospital. What else is going on?<p> 


	38. The Good Chief

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: This is one of the few chapters-I believe two only-in which a character that isn't major but still has an important impact on the storyline will have his perspective. There is an important reason why this must happen this way, you will understand as you read.

* * *

><p>Chapter 38 (The Good Chief)<p>

"The people want to know," said the investigator seated across from Gary. "You're the acting Chief right now, Los Angeles wants to know who shot their chief of police." Gary leaned to the right and cast his gaze off into space. He felt numb and listless discussing this matter, primarily because he didn't care.

He had nothing to do with the attempt on David's life, but he didn't think an investigation on the matter would be needed. Only, he did realize that if he told the investigators to ignore this, it would make him just as corrupted as the man himself.

"Well I don't know, and I'm not going to speed the investigation by planting an innocent person as suspect." The investigator he was talking to was a good friend that knew how corrupt David was. He didn't know about the matters with the Vega family, but he knew how many criminals David beat up throughout his career for no apparent reason. Including Juan Carlo, who'd been hospitalized for wounds David caused him.

This investigator wished to expose David as the corrupt man he was, and Gary wanted to do the same. "This could be the opportunity you need, by the way." Gary's gaze drifted back to the man and he turned his hand over his mouth, casting a shadow across the bottom of his face. "You've wanted to find something, to build a case and get him without him ordering any investigations on him to end. He's hospitalized, he can't do his job right now-this is your moment."

"I see what you're saying, but there isn't anything I can use." He hated the man, hated him enough to ruin his career and his life. Yet, he had to do so in a way that was legal, and it wouldn't affect Holly or the girls. The only thing truly that he had was his home life, and there was no way he was going to expose the girls to an investigation on David's life at home.

"Yes there is! There's Juan Carlo, for one. Think about it." The investigator set a spiral notebook in front of him. Gary lowered his hand as the investigator moved a set of folders beside him. "Juan Carlo is just one victim here. There's a list of all the inmates that during, before or after questioning, was either beaten or hospitalized by Chief Vega over the last fifteen years." Juan was only the most memorable because he'd been an innocent man hospitalized by David, and later came out with brain damage "With at least one who never had trial because the 'investigating officer' put them in a coma."

"Okay, let me see this." Gary grabbed the notes compiled by the officer and raised his eyebrows as he read over the list of names. He was shocked to see at least twenty criminals, each charged with different degrees of sex offenses, brutalized by David. "How the hell did he manage to cover all of this up? He wasn't even Chief fifteen years ago!"

"No, but you know he was always good friends with the chief at the time."

"Shit…" Gary scratched his head and threw the notebook down while uttering a string of curses. It boggled his mind that the chief before David could have been so corrupt that he might have covered David's tracks for him. "I don't care what crimes they committed, police brutality is not something that I can tolerate on the force. Did his actions force a confession out of any of these men and women? If so, we might have an issue."

"Not that I can find pending my investigation, sir. Most of these were put in by the DNA evidence found against them along with witness testimonies. They were simply beaten by Chief Vega, for reasons I haven't discovered."

"We're not going to investigate his reasoning." Gary's blood boiled as he continued to skim through the remaining notes compiled by the investigator. "If we can get these victims to testify, to sue…if we can build a case off this, we can expose the corruption in him."

"All of Los Angeles would hate this man," warned the investigator. Gary's lips curved up and he shrugged his shoulders. "The city council might even vote to remove him, to fire him. The only problem is, all these victims are not just ordinary criminals. They're sex offenders-how can we possibly gain sympathy from the people?"

"We can't. The only thing that matters is getting his ass in court. Seeing that justice is served. Criminals or no, his actions are negligible and need to be brought to light."

"I understand. Just keep in mind that now is the best time to investigate, while the chief is incapacitated." Gary laced his fingers together and perched his chin atop his bent knuckles, narrowing his eyes at the investigator. "Because now, he can't stop an investigation on his misconduct."

"I will need some time to think on this matter…" He wanted to discuss this with Holly, to make sure she would be okay with such an investigation on her husband. "I will let you know if this is an investigation I wish to pursue."

"Yes sir."

It didn't help that as an acting chief, this misconduct had 'officially' been brought to his attention. If he turned down the investigation, it would seem he was trying to cover it up.

As the investigator left, he closed his eyes and moved his forehead down against his hands. "I'm in a difficult spot now." It sickened him to think he had to make an effort to arrest the person responsible for nearly killing David, then he was going to have to champion a bunch of sex offenders that might want justice for what David did to them. "Why the hell couldn't those bullets kill you, Dave? I'd rather be investigating your murder, not your attempted murder as well as misconduct."

He curled his hand over his chin and grabbed the notebook from the desk. His eyes trailed the list of names and stopped on one Annabel Franklin. He recognized the name, she was a girl he and David investigated in 2006 on charges of indecent exposure and attempt to seduce a ninth grader at the park.

Anna was only twenty-three at the time. She had soft brown hair, deep brown eyes, and an oval shaped face. When they arrested her and took her in for questioning, Gary had been called away to the emergency room. Holly had taken Trina in because she was having difficulty urinating, and when she did, only blood was coming out. This left David to question Anna.

The next thing he remembered of the young girl was her being transported into the hospital that same night. She'd been beaten and put into a coma. After Gary questioned David about it, the man was firm that he had no idea how she got beaten. David claimed to have released her to the jail for the night, so he accused one of the guards of having done the job.

The sitting Chief at the time took David's word and the guard watching Anna's cell that night lost his job. Days later that guard would be found dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

"Mark my words, David. I will tear you apart." His hand covered his nose, mouth and chin. He flicked his eyes out over the top of his hand and narrowed them at the wall containing photos of all Los Angeles's police chiefs. David's was at the very bottom, the man was smiling with confidence and seated with a strong demeanor. "Not violently…but you will go down. If not for the sake of Annabel, if not for Juan Carlo, if not for your wife and daughters…for that guard who lost his life because of you. When I'm done, you're going to wish that shooter killed you-but now I'm glad he didn't."

Within the hour he was visiting with Holly, asking her opinion about the case. "And you-you said the poor girl's still in a coma?" Holly's brow furrowed as she sat beside Gary.

"Yes. I checked before coming over, she's been on life support ever since."

"Did they-did they ever find out if she was guilty of what she was accused of?"

"You know I can't tell you that."

"I know, I just-I hate to think that he attacked all those people. I _know _they're criminals too, but-"

"Not a single one of them deserved what they got, Holly. I can tell you this much." He crossed his arms and leaned back on the couch as Holly's gaze drifted into his. "None of them, not one of these men and women were _ever_ charged with something as heinous as what David did." Holly's hand flew up over her mouth and she let out a loud sob. Gary frowned as she leaned into him, putting her head to his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Holly…"

"No, it's fine." She pulled back and wiped her eyes. "This is too much. I just, if you think you have a case. I'm fine, just make sure my daughters don't get pulled into it."

"I wouldn't want to do anything that would involve them. This investigation will only investigate his misconduct."

"I appreciate you looking out for us, Gary." She took a deep breath and clenched her eyelids shut. "Thinking about those people, and you say none of them ever did anything as bad as my husband. Then none of them deserved what they got. None died?"

"Not that I can find." Only Anna seemed to come closest. As he investigated her case more, he discovered the reason that the guard took his life. He'd been accused of sexual assault, the doctor on staff found evidence of recent assault. Gary was horrified and shocked when he learned this, and it only fueled his desire to bring David down.

"You and the girls won't be affected by this investigation, Holly. I promise you that."

"Good." Holly moved her hand through her hair and looked to the window. Tori was outside with her cousins Peter and Sarah. She turned up a smile, which quickly faded. "Are there any potential leads on who shot him?"

"Not yet. The investigators say they found a puppet discarded by the back bushes. Looked like it had been dropped. I know David didn't own any of those, so…" Holly's jaw fell and her hand drifted up to her mouth.

"No." The word came out in a quick breath. "One of Tori's friends owns a puppet, but he hasn't been around since…since David came home that night. Robbie, I think the name is. David attacked him after he told him about Trina, I think Robbie thought he was helping…"

"So he knows David's abusive?"

"As of that night, probably. I don't think he knows the extent, but he definitely is aware." It could be Robbie shot David, thinking that he would be helping the family by ridding them of the monster. Whether or not this boy had anything to do with it, this information meant he'd have to be brought in.

"Alright." Gary pressed his lips together and pushed himself from the chair. "I'll have to bring him in for questioning." Holly curled her fingers against her chin, then lifted her hand up to him.

"Go easy on the boy, Gary. If he did do it, I don't think-I don't know what he was thinking." Gary moved his hands to his sides and a single chuckle fell from his lips.

"All things considered, I'll go easy on him." Hell, he was the good cop at this point. For investigation purposes, it truly did seem the chief before David was just as corrupt for letting David have the run of the place. They had a deadline to reach, though, so he needed to start building up a number of investigations. "Maybe I'll offer Mr. Shapiro some leniency."

"Really?"

"No, I can't do that without seeming corrupt, if he's guilty he's to be held in the full extent of the law. Still, I will be kind to the boy." Sadly true. Part of him wanted to congratulate the boy while the other part of him wanted to say he should have aimed for a more vital location. Still, no matter how much he hated David, the only and best way he could get the man was by investigating the misconduct towards these various criminals.

For all intents and purposes, the two he wanted to focus an investigation most on were the innocent man, Juan Carlo, and the comatose Annabel. Even if all other prisoners were to aid in cementing David's downfall, those two in particular could gain the public sympathy that his investigator said they might need to succeed.

* * *

><p>Annabel will become a crucial part, I'm sure. It looks like the chief before David was corrupt too, turning a blind eye and all. Let's hope Gary and his investigators can fix things before David can get out of the hospital to put a stop to any pending investigations.<p> 


	39. Delving Further Into Insanity

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

* * *

><p>Chapter 39 (Delving Further Into Insanity)<p>

"I'm waiting for you still." The great demon's laugh pierced David's dreams, fusing with the steady beeping which he did know the location of. The fire that engulfed him drew the sweat from his pores and created a sensation that forced him to scratch at all points of his body. Only his arms could move, and the rest of his body was overcome with a great numbness. "Why don't you give up. Come join us here in hell, the temperature is nice this time of year."

"Leave me alone. Leave me alone!" David's hands caressed his head and slid down his face as he cried out in anguish. The walls that surrounded him held the appearance of being painted with blood while the bed he lay in seemed to strap him down. "I'll find that boy. I'll find him and kill him! I swear it!"

"Oh yes add murder to your extensive rap sheet." Ross moved alongside him and set his fiery palm onto his stomach. "That boy was only trying to help the girls, poor kid is so misguided. Almost as misguided as you." David screamed as Ross's fingernails sliced into him. "No amount of morphine will numb this pain, for it's a pain that goes deep into your soul. I know you best, David. Don't you forget it."

"Go away, creature! I hate you, I will have none of this."

Ross moved his hand up to his chest and leaned forward. Two folds appeared on his forehead, and his jowls held a sagging appearance. "Oh David, you're breaking my heart. I guess I'm going to have to crush yours." His eyes widened as the demon's hand sliced down into his chest. He arched his body upwards, screaming out in pain and terror.

"Help me! God help me!"

"For the last time." He whimpered as his heart trembled in Ross's grasp. "God can't help you." David clenched his eyes and held back a scream while Ross twisted his organs and burned the blood that was within his body. "You're just a sack of red fluid now, David. Inhuman beast filled with blood. How can it be that you bleed when you are such a monster?" David's lips twisted into a scowl and he lifted his head, screaming at the demon.

"Who are you to call me a monster, demon?" His chest quivered as a number of pants fell from his mouth. Ross threw his head back in laughter, only to be drowned out by the crackling of the fire rising above them. "You think I'm a monster for what I did ages ago?"

"You touched those girls, harmed them and destroyed them." Ross leaned over, clutching David's face with a tight grip. The man's head hovered inches from his, and his cold unfeeling eyes seemed to poison David's. "Then for every criminal that was accused of something that reminded you of _your sin_, you judged them. Punished them. Beat them all! Feel proud, David, you alone judged so many for your own faults!"

"Shut the fuck up! They deserved it! All of them, every one of them deserved it."

"And you deserve what? To walk away free?" Ross released David's face, then smacked him on the cheek. David turned his head away feeling a great deal of pain shooting through his body. "You should be fortunate. That boy shot you three times, once in the head, and you survived. Lucky you, but unlucky for those who hate you."

"Screw you to hell!"

"I'm already in hell, David, and we're waiting for you. The hot seat still boils." David screamed as his skin began to bubble and pop. When he looked down to his body, he saw a sickening sight. Yellow and green pus was draining from the parts of his body that would start popping. His stomach churned with disgust as the wounds where the bullets went in began to foam and harden with a thick crust.

His breathing hitched and his eyes shot out to the corners where he saw a strange black oil draining down his face. "What-What's happening to me!"

"Your blood, it's turning as black as your soul." The demon's voice was calm and casual, startling him into a panicked scream. A sudden sting like a that of a wasp struck his right arm, causing him to awaken in a white walled hospital room.

Breathing heavily he looked around him and felt of his body. His head was wrapped in bandages, there was a large bandage pack on his right breast, and a bandage around his abdomen and back. Beside him was the doctor, and the therapist, Hector.

"David, talk to me." Hector's voice was in the air, untraceable, as though disembodied. "The doctor just gave you a shot of extra morphine, I believe you were having a nightmare. Or at the very least, hallucinations."

"Wh-What happened to me?"

"You were shot. Three times. One hit you in the head and cracked a region of your skull, while a second shot penetrated your back and struck your spine." David's eyes widened as he looked to his legs. He couldn't feel them, but he saw them. "The third bullet went into your chest cavity, coming inches from your heart. The doctors were working on removing that bullet after they removed the one to your head. You should consider yourself very fortunate to be alive…but the doctors say that you may have some brain damage and might not be able to walk again."

"No!" Tears welled up in his eyes as he reached for his legs. "No I've got to get out of here. I've got to find that boy-the one who shot me."

"You were saying a number of things, David. One of which, you wanted to find and kill the person that shot you." David's eyes darted over to Hector and he let out a sudden whimper. "That said, right now Chief Malone is acting in your place as Chief. He feels there is a threat to your life still, so he's ordered you kept hospitalized."

This was insanity, he didn't feel a danger to his life any more than he felt heartburn. "I'm not in danger, Hector. The only one in danger is that kid!" He threw his hand over his mouth and watched as his therapist let out a heavy sigh.

"Even still, he is in police custody at the moment." Hector crossed his arms and studied David closely. "Since you express desire to murder this boy, you realize that I am going to have to report it."

"No, you don't have to." David winced as he struggled to move his legs, but was only met by a surge of pain. "I did some investigating. Did you know he was responsible for cutting that harness several years ago? My daughter was hospitalized. That, that right there is what I want to kill him for."

"I see." Hector stood up and walked to the door of the examination room. When David looked at the man, he saw Ross's head and face snarling at him. David's body froze and a shiver ran down his spine. "What is it, David? Why do you look at me like that."

"Y-You're not my therapist. You're that demon!"

"Demon, David? I am your therapist."

"No you're not." He grabbed the edge of his hospital bed and tried to pull himself out, screaming with peril. "Get me out of here. Somebody! Please!"

"David, relax."

"No, get away." An army of hospital staff came rushing by Hector, grabbing David by the shoulders and arms. He screamed once more as they pushed him back onto the bed, then proceeded to strap him down. "God I'm not crazy. Let me go now, I need to get out of here! I need to get back to my job."

"I'm afraid that's not possible, David." His eyes widened as Hector turned to face him fully. "It seems some criminals you put away have decided to build a case against you. You're under investigation." His heart stopped and his jaw hung open as Hector bowed his head. "Is there anything you'd like to tell me now, while you still have a chance? Have you attacked anybody else, whether physically or sexually?"

"What? No!" Sweat ran down the side of his head as his eyes darted back and forth. He felt his heart racing in his chest, and his body trembling with each panicked beat. Hector's face sank and his shoulders fell.

"I can tell you are lying to me, David. You might need a lawyer."

"Who the hell is heading this stupid investigation?"

"Chief Malone." The trembling in his body ceased along with his heartbeat. The feeling of betrayal stabbed him in the back like that of a heavy sword that came crashing down.

"He took my wife, my kids, and now he thinks he's going to take my job? Fuck that!"

Hector dismissed the staff in the room and walked over to him. He grabbed ahold of the edge of the bed and looked down into David's eyes. "I need you to think very clearly. Annabel Franklin. Do you remember her?"

The name rang a bell, but trying to think of the woman caused his head to throb with a voracious pain. "I know that name." The significance of her, he couldn't think of.

Hector's voice lowered and his arms folded across his chest. "She was charged with indecent exposure back in 2006." The man's face tensed and David studied him, seeing a new emotion in his therapist's eyes that he'd never seen before. "She'd been hanging out with a group of college kids the night before and was skinny dipping in the lake. As a prank, her friends took her clothes, forcing her to get out of the park naked…there were some eighth graders there and a few parents who saw, so she was arrested."

"That's sad." David turned his eyes down as flashes of memory came to him. He remembered a girl with gentle features, trembling in an empty room. Her eyes held a look of fear that struck an emotional chord in him. Only a blanket hugged her naked form. "What happened to her?"

"She was beaten and sexually assaulted that night. Authorities pointed to the jail guard, who killed himself a few days later." Hector's lips pressed into a thin line and David trembled at the visual in his mind. "She's been comatose ever since. Her family's been thinking of taking her off life support."

"I see. So why is her name coming up?"

"She's a part of the pending investigation against you. Are you sure she doesn't seem familiar to you?"

"No, I-wait…" He put his hand over his eyes, groaning as the flashes grew more intense. He pictured the girl again, only this time through crazed and angry eyes. She was bruised and covered with blood that flowed from a wound caused by hitting the investigation table. David's hand slid down to his mouth and a soft gasp drifted from his lips. "Oh god."

"What is it, David?"

"I-I know that girl. She…I hurt her, didn't I? In my anger, yes, that was me. That jail guard didn't do anything, I pointed to him so I wouldn't be caught." David's eyes darted around the room as Hector's body tensed and his face darkened. David looked up with a whimper and reached out. "Hector, help me. I think I'm getting worse. Maybe I need medication."

"I don't think I can treat you any longer, David. Conflict of personality." David's arm fell as Hector turned away and moved to the door. In anger he lashed out, cursing the therapist for leaving him. Hector turned his head over his shoulder, holding onto a frown. "Anna Franklin was my niece, David. I can no longer help you."

David's eyes locked onto the door as it opened, then shut. Once more he was alone, but now terrified. "No one's left to defend you now David." Ross's voice cursed him. He looked around frantically trying to locate the demon, but it was just a voice in his head. "You're all alone now. Left to think about your sins, your crimes. Left to fester, your soul turning black as night-it is beautiful." The demon laughed once more and he moved his arms to hug himself. "Left to dive further into your own insanity. Don't fret though. The hell you will live out the rest of your days will be nothing compared to what awaits you when you die."

He clutched his head and let out a final series of screams, trying to drown out the voice. "When will you learn that I exist in your mind because I am you. Everything I say, I do, because it is your own thoughts…a 'conscience' that you associate with a demon. The hell, the visions you see, they're of your own making. Nothing more, nothing less."

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><p>So the truth comes out regarding one of the victims. Perhaps once he is put away, he will no longer be able to hurt anyone. This will be his end, alone and broken. Justice will be served<p> 


	40. Brisk Reunion

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: This chapter details a bit of a reunion. For those of you who haven't gone back to look at chapter 10-by the time I got to this chapter I realized my mistake-Carly's oldest is her daughter Jessica, named for her late mother. Kevin is Spencer's son. I had to fix that.

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><p>Chapter 40 (Brisk Reunion)<p>

Sam cuddled close to Derek as they lay in the bedroom of their new apartment. She was comfortable wearing only her bra and underwear as he was shirtless and wore a pair of flannel pants. "Have I mentioned how great it is having you back here?"

"Only every day since I've been back." Derek moved his hand from behind his head and tucked it underneath her shoulders. Looking at him, she admired how the morning sun spilled across his bare chest, illuminating it. She kissed his chest once, then moved up to kiss his lips. In response, Derek let out a gentle sigh and hugged her close with his arm. "I've missed those kisses."

"I've missed being next to you." She moved her hand to his chest and nuzzled her head in the crevice beneath his chin. Her eyes drifted to her hand and her lips curved into a smile. The engagement ring on her finger glistened under the light of the sun. "I've been thinking, Derek. We haven't set a date yet."

"It could be tomorrow if you wanted it to be. Though, I'm picturing your entire family at the wedding. Terrifying." Sam laughed once and kissed his jaw.

"You know my mom and all my aunts have been trying to plan the wedding. Constantly I hear 'when is the date, Samantha?'." His rich laugh enchanted her, drawing a gentle sigh. "Well, now that I'm back from overseas, I don't know. What do you want? Elegant, simple? I'll do anything you like." She'd given it some thought, and she didn't want anything fancy like some of her aunts were begging for.

"Aunt Janet insists on fancy and elegant. Aunt Umika wants it to be done in a traditional Japanese style. Aunt Nancy thinks a simple one is fine. Aunt Isabel thinks no ceremony is necessary, because she didn't have a ceremony. Mom is _begging_ me to let her plan everything from my dress to the centerpiece on the cake. Then there's Aunt Erica who wants me to do something to commemorate Aunt Rebecca."

"Your aunt Rebecca's the one that passed in '04, correct?"

"Yeah. Erica and Rebecca were always the closest."

"Can I say one thing?" Derek smirked at Sam as she looked up to him. "I just love how your grandma decided to name all her kids after her." It was one letter at a time, of course Sam didn't even know how her grandmother thought to do it.

"Well, remember Aunt Umika was adopted, so that's kind of how grandma Juniper got the 'u' child. Boy or girl she would have found a way to have seven kids just for that purpose." She laughed as he shook his head. "You know, it's funny."

"What?"

"I didn't realize it until recently, but one of my clients has a friend whose name is the same as your last name."

"Beckett?" Derek's eyes lit up with amusement. His lips spread into a wide grin while Sam laughed at the thought.

"Yeah. Imagine that." As she set her head back down, she thought about the number of guests they might have at their wedding. With as large as her family was, compared to the size of Derek's, she knew this would be no small feat. "We need to give our relatives time to prepare, right?"

"Well, at least a month's notice, I think."

"I don't want to wait a month. I've waited three years." He laughed lightly and gave her a gentle kiss on her forehead. "Maybe I'll call mom, ask her what she thinks is a good period of time for notifying the family." Knowing Pam, she'd jump on a plane the next day if it meant her daughter getting married. "Melanie's already beat me to the punch on the whole marriage thing." Not to mention Carly and Douglas were married, so Sam was beginning to feel like she'd waited far too long.

"I say we get married tomorrow."

"I'd agree, but I think you and I both know how much our families want to actually be _present_ when we get married." Derek snapped his fingers and lifted a hand in suggestion.

"Get the marriage certificate first, then have a ceremony to satisfy both of our families."

"Now that sounds like an idea."

"July 4th." Sam raised an eyebrow and lifted herself up partially to look to him. He flashed a grin and returned both his hands behind his head. "We get married on July 4th. How's that sound?"

"Independence day?"

"Yep. The day of freedom, independence. The past is gone, the future is tomorrow." He lifted his hand and swept his fingers through her hair while gazing into her eyes. "And I see fireworks every time I'm with you. So it fits." Her cheeks grew red and she collapsed onto his chest with a contented sigh.

"It sounds good to me. Maybe the reception can be a barbeque outdoors, we can have an independence theme…I like it."

"Thought you might. Possibly a sunset wedding, then after the reception we can watch fireworks."

"The more I hear, the more I like." Her cell phone began to chime, startling the both of them. She looked to the end table with a frown and reached across Derek to grab her phone. "Let me see who's calling." She glanced at the ID, surprised to see Cat's number. "It's Cat. I wonder if everything's alright over there."

"Answer it." He sat up and leaned back against the headboard. She positioned herself beside him and let him move his arm around her shoulders while she answered the call.

"Hey Sam, I think you should come over!" Cat exclaimed cheerfully. "You'll never believe what kid and her parents are visiting right now."

"I don't know Cat, Derek and I are planning on spending the day just lounging around the house and watching Netflix."

"Come on Sam, come over."

"Well who's over there?"

"It's a surprise."

"You know I don't do well with surprises."

"Humor me? Besides! I still haven't even met Derek and he's been over for what, a week now?"

"Two weeks, but I've lost count." Her cheeks burned brighter and she leaned her head against his shoulder. "Alright Cat, let us get ready and we'll be over. Give us about an hour to take a shower and stuff." She smiled at Derek and watched with glee as his eyebrows rose.

"Okay. I'll let the guests know."

An hour and a half later, Sam and Derek arrived at Sam's apartment. There was no indicator of who was present, but that was fine. Cat let them into the house, and Sam's eyes fell onto the couch where they remained with shock.

Carly was sitting beside Douglas, their daughter Jessica was curled up between them. Sam's heart jumped up and her hand flew to her chest as if to catch it. "Oh my god. Carly?" Carly flashed a grin and spread her arms out.

"I'd get up and hug you, but I've got a three year old daughter using me as her pillow."

"That's okay, I-I, what are you doing here? I mean…" She hurried to Carly's side and sat beside her, still stumbling over her words. She reached around to hug her and Jessica, then looked to Douglas with a bright-eyed smile. "And Doug, it's good to see you in person again."

"Carly couldn't go back to Seattle without stopping by your place first," he answered. Sam gasped as Carly bowed her head and grinned. "Turns out Spencer and Sasha are having another baby. Carly's been missing him and her nephew, so we're ready to head back. Done traveling the globe."

"Yep we're ready to settle for sure," Carly replied. "I think Sasha's pregnant with a girl. Little Jessica's probably going to enjoy growing up having a female cousin."

"Are you sure you're ready to head back to Seattle, Carly? There's a lot of memories there."

"I know." Carly cleared her throat and turned her eyes to Sam's. "But the way I see it, you can't run away forever. At some point of time, you have to face the past and accept it for what it is, then learn and grow. If I try and avoid Seattle just because of the hell I went through, then there's a lot of good things I'll end up missing out on…like my brother's family." The girl's brow furrowed and she bowed her head. "Hearing about Sasha's pregnancy, it just made me think, I've been spending too much time running and trying to hide. Dad's long gone, grandpa too. But then, so is Carlos…and that gang…"

Sam glanced past her friend and saw Trina's head poking out of the hallway. Trina was listening to what Carly was saying, and there was a strange new look in her eyes. Carly did have good advice if Trina was willing to truly hear and understand. Running didn't erase the fact that the past was there, and it certainly didn't help one to grow.

"You should be with your brother." Sam set a hand on Carly's wrist and smiled through her joyous tears. "I bet Spencer misses you too." Carly laughed nervously and ran her hand over her neck.

"Yeah, he does. I know. It's kind of silly, I mean…he was through with me, then he let me back in and I move to Italy with Douglas." Though Italy wasn't her initial destination. Carly and Doug had literally been spanning the globe. They stayed a time in Australia, the Ireland, headed over to Germany for a time, and finally made their way down the boot of Italy. "Jessica will probably like staying in one place too."

"I bet." Sam rubbed the toddler's back and watched as the girl's eyes fluttered. "It must have been a long flight."

"Oh it was. Poor thing was up the whole time." The way Sam understood it, each time Carly and Doug got on a plane with their daughter, Jessica could not relax. Carly took a deep breath and bounced Jessica on her leg, rocking the child. "So Sam, Derek, what plans do you two have?"

"Wh-us?" Sam blinked while Carly's lips spread into a wide grin.

"Of course you. It's been three years now, so surely you two have some sort of plan." She stammered to get a word out, but Derek had to answer for her.

"We're planning our wedding." Carly's mouth opened and a gasp of joy erupted from her. Douglas chuckled once and approved with a thumbs-up.

"It's about damn time," Doug replied, "We were starting to wonder if you two were ever going to get married." Carly smacked his chest and Sam laughed. "So, any thoughts about who fills what role?"

"I already know who I'm going with." Sam straightened herself and pushed her chest out with pride. "I want Carly to be my Matron of Honor." Carly closed her hand and pulled it down with a quick cheer. "As for my bridesmaids. Valerie, Melanie, and Cat."

"Sounds good. How about you?" Doug pointed to Derek, who seemed to be a bit lost in the decision-making process.

"Well, Cat is a new addition." Derek scratched his chin and squinted his eyes. "I suppose I'll need to think of three groomsmen now. Freddie and Jonah are a given, I'd been planning on those two a while. Douglas would be a good best man."

Doug crossed his arms and flashed a quirky smirk. "I find it amusing you two are talking about us like we're not sitting right here."

"Very funny."

"You get along with your brother well, Derek? Why don't you just have Josh be your third groomsman."

"Yeah, that does sound like a good plan."

"I can't wait," Carly cheered, "When's the wedding?" Carly took Sam's hand and gave it an excited squeeze. Sam's cheeks continued to turn a darker shade of red, as she wasn't used to this kind of attention. Or at least hadn't been used to it for a while now.

"We're thinking July 4th. Maybe a sunset wedding and fireworks after the reception."

"Sounds great! Have you called your mom and dad yet?"

"Not yet, we're planning to. I still haven't decided how I'm going to respond to the many questions all five of my aunts are going to ask." Of course that was just her mother's side. Then there was Aunt Maggie on her dad's side, but she wasn't too pushy about her ideas on how a wedding should be. Maggie once told Sam that whenever she gets married, she should do it her way. Even if that was some cheesy iCarly video, she'd still be there to cheer her on. "Still have to call Valerie too, and I have a feeling she's going to want to make the cake."

"She still runs that restaurant, right?"

"She got the apprenticeship with Rachael Ray, remember?"

"Oh yeah! I do."

"I think she's back in Seattle now, pretty sure she runs that restaurant or at least is a manager there. I know she has her own cooking show thanks to her idol." Valerie would definitely tell Sam not to order any bakery to make the cake, but to let her deal with all the food items. Still she wasn't sure if she wanted a strict Italian style meal, as much as she loved Italian food.

"It's going to be exciting." Carly cheered once again and her eyes lit up like diamonds. "I can't wait!" Sam leaned back and scratched at the back of her head. It seemed she'd have to give up on the idea of a quiet and relaxing month before the wedding. "Doug, we need to find a place to stay for the month."

Douglas laughed nervously and gestured to the door. "Or we could go to Seattle, move into the new house, and fly back here around the week of the wedding."

"Oh yeah, we could do that. Whatever works."

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><p>It's good to see Doug and Carly again, and it's great to hear a wedding will be underway.<p> 


	41. A Therapist's Wedding

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: I avoid wedding chapters because they're so mundane and typical, but I've never done one in the view of a guest before, so here we go.

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><p>Chapter 41 (A Therapist's Wedding)<p>

"Our loophole for being here is that we're here for Cat," Trina remarked with a smirk. She knew how difficult it was to be involved with a therapist's personal life for ethical reasons, so if anyone said anything-which no one should-they only had to say they were here because of one of the bridesmaids.

Tori looked at all the people that surrounded them. "I'm just glad to be at a wedding." Trina was surprised Tori wasn't going to be playing the wedding singer, but she didn't mind. Ever since starting therapy, Tori had begun to focus less on performing for people and just focusing on herself and her family. "Who's singing at the wedding, Trina? Do you know?"

"The reception is open karaoke." However they did hire an actual singer for both the bride-groom dance as well as father-daughter dance. "Where did our mother vanish off to?" She scanned the crowd with an anxious gaze, the woman had been right beside them.

"Over at food table." Tori pointed to the table where one of Sam's bridesmaids and best friends stood. The girl was wearing a long purple dress and had soft brown hair, in front of her was a double layered cake with light yellow frosting. "Along with the wedding cake, Valerie prepared an Italian cream cake that people can have a slice of before the reception…"

Standing at the table as well, and talking to one of Sam's aunts, was Holly. In her hand was a plate bearing a slice of the very cake Valerie prepared. Trina smiled and shook her head gently. "Go figure, someone opens food up before the wedding gets started, and mom's already over there."

Jason's teasing voice startled her from behind. "I'm surprised you're not." She turned to see the smirking man dressed in full uniform as all the military men here today were. That was nearly half the guest list, but she didn't mind. It was great to see all these military men here to support a newly married couple. "You love food."

"I'm saving up for the reception. There's going to be _barbeque._"

"Can't argue with that."

"I know!"

Tori crossed her arms and turned her head away. "I feel left out, everybody and my sister has a date." Granted Holly didn't come with Gary. She wanted to ask him, but she'd been taking everyone's advice and not dating him while still dealing with David.

Somehow Gary managed to keep David hospitalized for the last month, so the girls didn't have much to worry about. Even with as calm and clear as the skies were, there was a storm brewing over that hospital. David had come under investigation for abusing his authority as a police officer, and it was all over the news about this corruption.

Then there was the issue of Robbie, who hit the family hard when they found out he was the one that shot David.

To their left, there was a boy with a light tan and shaggy brown hair that was staring at them. He seemed to have overheard Tori's outburst. "I'm not here with anyone," he replied. Tori glanced at him with an arched brow and scanned him closely. He was Tori's age, and bore a nametag reading _Jacob Rogers. _"Does it matter if you have a date?"

"Well yes, I mean, I don't like feeling like I came alone." Tori put her hands to her hips and narrowed her eyes at the boy. "At least if you say you came alone too, I feel _slightly_ better. I have no idea who you are, so I'm trying to figure out just how better I should feel."

"Eh, cousin to the bride." Tori's eyebrows shot up and she glanced to the other known relatives of Sam. Most of the men in the family had muscular tone and darker tans, but Jacob was the exact opposite.

"Cousin? I find that hard to believe."

"Why?" He chuckled once and spread his arms out. "Because I'm skinny? I don't work out or have a job that requires heavy labor like my cousins." Jacob lowered his arms and glanced off to the right. "I used to play games all the time, mom's got me focusing more on my classes now, so I'm always inside studying."

"Well, not to sound mean but you should work out just a little bit." Jacob crossed his arms and slanted his eyes as Tori circled him. "You're cute and all, but if you're cooped up inside all the time, it's detrimental to your health."

"Cu-what?" Jacob raised an eyebrow and Tori stopped to scratch her chin while scanning him with her eyes.

"Just saying. You're studying a lot? Where do you go to college?"

"Transferring to Stanford this fall to study graphic design and computer software." Tori's eyes lit up and her jaw fell open.

"That's like my dream school!" Tori looked to Trina and motioned to the boy. "Trina, he's going to Stanford." Jacob scratched the back of his head and Tori drew out a heavy sigh. "Sorry, I've just been wanting to go to Stanford since I was young. I want to study animal sciences."

"Sounds good."

Trina watched bemused as the two continued to chat about the health benefits of working out and college among other things. She turned to Jason and saw the same look of laughter in his eyes.

She made her way to the bulk of the crowd where Sam's youngest Aunt was chatting with her sisters. The only one that wasn't there was Pam, but she was helping Sam in the bride's room. "Yes I was wrong," Erica proclaimed while rolling her eyes. The woman put her hand to her chest and drew a long, heavy sigh. "Samantha's become a respectable woman, and she's marrying a wealthy and respectable man. I am proud of her."

"He's not that wealthy," Nancy chortled, "Just because he's in the military doesn't make him rich. It makes him a man of respect." Isabel agreed with her sister while Janet and Umika simply ignored the gossip.

Trina brushed up alongside the oldest sister, Janet, curious about the woman's thoughts about her younger siblings. "Why does Erica talk about her niece like that?" Janet took a small sip from her wine glass and shrugged.

"It's just the family matters. Erica has always been critical of Sam, it led to some serious problems three years ago. We all pretty much ignore her remarks now, but she has toned down."

"Sam mentioned having one aunt that was a drama queen."

"Erica." Janet pulled the wine glass from her lips with a laugh and glanced towards her sister with a look of amusement and care. "She knows how to stir up trouble, but that isn't something I want to get into. Out of respect for her and Sam."

"I understand." Trina smiled at a couple of older guests at the other end of the building. Janet followed her gaze and pointed to them.

"Mom, Dad, and Grandpa Chuck. Chuck's going to be 104 in August, can you believe it?" Trina's eyes widened momentarily and her lips drifted into a smile. To see someone live to be that age was always amazing to her. It was fascinating to see how a person managed to make it so long, though she didn't want to reach that age. Ninety felt like a comfortable age to pass.

Umika glanced at them and turned partially. "Have either of you seen Derek's family? Our family is too large."

Janet's eyebrows lifted as she sipped her wine once more. "Understatement. I can't even find Melanie or her husband-and Melanie looks like the bride."

"I think she's helping Sam and her mom in the Bride's quarters. Mr. Benson's with the groomsmen in the Groom's chamber."

"Derek's family is all Air Force, you'd think our family wouldn't be able to make them all blend in so easily. Considering none of us are wearing military uniforms, except for a few."

No longer interested in conversation, Trina said a polite farewell and moved on. She'd seen Derek's relatives somewhere, but they must have gone off somewhere. Hopefully they'd be back before the wedding kicked off.

The wedding would be outside of the church, with the altar in front of the lake. The church itself was large and expansive, and several guests had decided to walk around the building.

As she left the foyer, she heard Tori chatting once more with Jacob. They were taking a walk and talking about college. Seeing Tori opening herself up to make a new friend brought a smile to her. Not to mention, this was the longest she'd seen her sister go talking to a boy that wasn't either already in her group of friends or in her immediate family.

She made her way down a narrow hallway and stopped in front of a dimly lit room. Inside was a thirteen year old girl with a crème colored dress and neatly curled brown hair. The girl was lounging on a couch and reading a book. _Black Beauty_.

"An old book, but a classic." The girl pulled the book from her face and looked up to Trina with a smile. "I'm Angelica. Wanted to get away from the crowd for a while."

"I'm Trina." She had to admit to the same, the large amount of people had started wearing on her. "You're part of the wedding?"

"Derek's little sister. Kind of glad he and Josh are holed up in the Groom's room." The girl flashed a casual smirk and hopped off the couch. "Having two protective older brothers is tiresome, thank god both of them have a wife to distract them now."

Trina laughed as Angelica swept her hair behind her neck. "So you like to have some time to yourself, I see. I'm a lot like that."

"Why? You got two brothers always wanting to know what you're up to?"

"No, I just like my quiet time."

"Me too." Angelica ran her fingers over her chin and as her eyes moved along Trina, a smile formed. "You're pretty, are you a friend of Sam's?"

"In a way." Trina crossed her arms and lifted her shoulders. "We're friends, but I'm closer to Cat."

Angelica squinted and snapped her fingers. "The bridesmaid with the red hair?"

"Yep."

"That's cool." Angelica glanced to the book in her hand and held it up. "You read much?"

"When I was younger. I haven't really done much in the last year or two."

"Ah. If you ever get a chance, you should read this." Angelica handed the book over and Trina took it with surprise. "I found it along the bookshelf here. I've got a copy at home. It's children's literature sure, but even at thirteen it's a good read."

She glanced down at the cover with a chuckle and stood silent as Angelica left the room. Intrigued, she took a seat on the couch and continued to look at the dark horse on the cover. "I've got some time before the ceremony really starts." Children's literature, she found it funny that a thirteen year old girl would talk about it like it was too young still.

Trina understood the message that _Black Beauty _carried. Despite being a book that would be apt to be the symbol of PETA, it taught kindness, sympathy and respect, teaching people to value others and themselves.

Upon reaching the end of the book, Trina closed it and looked up with tears in her eyes. She'd underestimated the impact of such a read, the power of the struggle that the horse went through. She didn't understand just how she could relate to the book, but seeing how so many of the owners in the book treated the horse reminded her of her own struggle.

There was a knock at the door, catching her attention. A man in a Seattle police uniform stood in the doorway. He had lightly colored hair and a thick moustache. Her heart stopped and her body dug further into the couch. "Hey, if you're one of the wedding guests, I'm letting everybody know the ceremony's fixing to start."

"O-Okay. You're Sam's father?"

"Yes."

"Thought so. My uh, my dad's a chief as well. Although I'm not sure how much longer, you've probably seen the news." Mr. Puckett rubbed his chin and shook his head.

"Terrible news, I'm sorry you and your family had to deal with that." Trina smiled gently as the man's eyes filled with concern.

"He wasn't a good father either, to be honest."

"I'm sorry." She eyed the nametag on the man's chest and let out a sad chuckle. _Dave Puckett. _"As a chief, and a father, I apologize for that man. I don't know what his home life was, but seeing the news, you can't help but to wonder. I am sorry for whatever that man put his family through."

"Thank you." Normally those words wouldn't mean anything to her, but in this instance they reached into her heart and gave her a lift. She wiped her eyes rose from the couch. "We haven't associated with him in a long time. It's best to just move on."

_David Puckett._ A chief in Seattle. Why was it she felt this man could have been what her father was like had her father not had whatever mental disorder plagued him?

"The ceremony starts in ten, everyone's heading outside now. You probably should join them."

"Yeah." The man walked off and she wiped her eyes, embarrassed to have been seen tearing up over a book.

"There you are!" Trina's head shot up and her eyes darted to the doorway where Jason had taken the father's place. There was a serene look on his face, and love in his eyes. "I've been looking for you.

"I've been here. You can stop looking, you found me." She walked towards him and wrapped her arm around his. With a deep breath, she moved her head to his shoulder and closed her eyes.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah I…just got done reading. Have you ever read the book, _Black Beauty_?"

"A long time ago."

"It's powerful." She let him guide her outside and to the white folding chairs that faced the lake and the stage where the altar was. The preacher stood waiting as every guest sat in their chairs.

The wedding singer began to sing Rhianna's _We Found Love in a Hopeless Place_. When the song started, the guests all turned to look at the path the people would walk.

The first bridesmaid and groomsman walked down the aisle, the only one that wasn't to be represented by such a song. Cat, and Derek's brother Josh. They waved at the guests and walked with a high stride.

The next were Melanie and Freddie, walking arm in arm. They stopped midway to the alter and Freddie dipped Melanie and brought her up with a quick peck on the lips. Once they reached the stage, Valerie and Jonah came out hand in hand.

They were swaying with the music, and Valerie appeared to be mouthing the words of the song. They stopped midway and posed with their backs pressed together. They looked over opposite shoulders, linking their eyes, then spun to face each other. They pecked each other on the lips, then locked their hands together, moving towards the altar as one would move in the middle of a tango. Upon reaching the destination, they broke and moved to their location.

Douglas and Carly were next, and they had an act which was different than the others. When they stopped midway, they faced one another, then looked in the direction they came. Their next move was to return in that direction.

The song ended and the piano player begun to play the _Wild Blue Yonder_. Derek moved along the aisle with Doug and Carly marching behind him with their hands in a saluting position. In respect, all the military personnel in the audience rose, including Jason, which surprised Trina at first.

When they broke to their places, the piano music once more shifted and all of the guests rose from their seats. The wedding march filled the air and tears broke out onto Trina's cheeks as she watched Sam walk around the corner of the church.

She had a long white dress being held by two young children as the flower girl walked in front of her, laying flowers for her to walk on. A veil covered Sam's face, but her beauty was clear for all to see.

For a split second, Trina was envious. Her eyes turned to Jason, then dipped towards the ground as she thought about her own future. If Sam could go through such a time in her life where all hope seemed so lost, but now she was marrying a man whom she truly loved and he loved her back, and she was happy, then why couldn't Trina have that herself?

For the first time in her life, Trina could picture herself in that long white dress while holding the bouquet of flowers in her hand. It was a breathtaking dream, and she hoped one day to have it come true.

Today Sam may not realize, but she'd become something of a symbol for Trina. A symbol of hope, hope that even though it would take some time, happiness could one day come for her too.

When she looked to her sister, who was standing beside Jacob, she could see a similar look in Tori's eyes. Both sisters used to hate weddings, and whenever they saw one on the television, they turned it off thinking that such a love couldn't happen for them.

She looked down to the book in her hand and turned up a smile. If Black Beauty could make it through the struggle, if Sam could make it through her struggle, then so could she.

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><p>It was nice seeing all the relatives, even infamous Aunt Erica. Hopefully you enjoyed that chapter.<p> 


	42. What Makes a Father

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

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><p>Chapter 42 (What Makes a Father)<p>

Gary stared blankly at the investigator before him, waiting for the man to repeat himself. "She's dead, sir." The words were reaching him, but yet they were not registering. It seemed that Annabel Franklin, who never responded to treatment, finally gave out. The wounds inflicted on her many years before caused her life to end. "Unless we can prove that jail guard's innocence-"

"He was fingered but never fully charged or arrested." Gary clasped his hands together and bent his forearms upwards to rest his face against his knuckles. His eyes closed as he visualized that girl on the night of her murder. "I do remember the guard being investigated, he had an alibi but no one looked. I was with David that night, but we know I was called away, leaving him with no alibi."

They'd already built a strong case against David in regards to the police brutality, and many of the prisoners had given their testimony in exchange for lighter sentences. Juan Carlo had given his, and he was the most damaged. The visual of the man being wheeled into to the courtroom and struggling to speak had been branded into Gary's mind. But now it was this news, Miss Franklin's death, that was truly haunting.

"We know he spoke with the former chief, Chief Andrews. If we can get a statement from that man…then we should." It was still murder if a comatose victim dies from their wounds, even years later. This meant clearly, they could charge David with murder so long as they could prove it was him that caused the wounds. "Let us focus on clearing that guard's name as well."

"You suppose Chief Andrews would admit to having covered up a crime?"

"The man is eighty years old, I hardly think he cares anymore." Gary lowered his hands to the desk and straightened himself in the chair. "We can hardly do much else with David in the hospital." Still he could be released into police custody. The trials that were going on right now were leaving him with an extensive amount of potential jail time. "Can we arrest and charge him with murder at this point?"

"Possibly, but with him still in the hospital, we shouldn't have to worry. It isn't as though he would skip town."

"Right. Then continue the investigation. I would like some time to think…" The investigator nodded and made his way out of the office. The city council of Los Angeles was already voting on whether or not to remove David from his seat. Of the candidates they were considering for replacement, Gary was at the top of the list.

He did not dare to let that power go to his head. With this case, however, it was tempting. He moved his fingers up beneath his chin once more and flared his nostrils, still reeling with disgust.

_"Don't leave me officer, that man scares me."_

"You should be safe, I said." Gary's eyelids clamped together and his lips stretched into a scowl. "I'll tell him to put you in a holding cell for later questioning." Gary stood from the desk and moved to the window of his office. As he gazed out, he locked his wrists behind his back and narrowed his eyes onto the street. "I had to console Holly, to make sure Trina was okay. Forgive me, Annabel…you will have your justice and your day in court. I swear onto it with my life. I owe you that much."

That evening, Holly and the girls paid him an unexpected visit. He was happy to see them, though unprepared. "The girls and I wanted to speak with you." He sat down in his brown recliner while Holly and her daughters sat on the couch.

"Is everything alright?"

"Yes." Holly clasped her hands together and straightened her back. "As you know, the divorce was finalized a week ago." He exhaled slowly and curved his lips into a tiny smile. It wasn't that he was happy about the divorce so much as he was happy that Holly and the girls had taken the measures to secure a good spot in their life. They weren't tied to the monster any longer, and that was good.

"I'm glad you're taking the steps to make your lives better." He'd been able to respect their wishes to stay on friendly terms without any kind of dating relationship, and he would keep things that way as long as it was wanted. However, he still loved them, but he was never one to push.

"We want you to be a part of our lives." His eyebrows moved inwards and he watched as Holly tapped her fingertips together and bit on her lower lip. "I'm-we're not asking you to rush into anything but…you are the closest my girls have had to having a real father. We love you, and we know that you genuinely care about us otherwise you wouldn't have been with us through everything."

"I'll always be a part of your lives, Holly. You know that." It meant the world that they were able to trust him, but he still wanted them to have time to recover from the wounds inflicted by David. "The divorce so fresh, I don't want you or the girls to resent me, thinking that I'm the reason."

"We know you're not," Tori replied while letting a heavy sigh depart from her lips. "I know mom wasn't and isn't trying to replace Dad with you, and we know the reason for the divorce is because of the things he's done to us…to others."

Trina folded her arms and looked to her mother with a smile. "Mom's happy. A lot happier now especially." She rubbed Holly's shoulder, turning her lips up as Holly bowed her head and reached her hand up to pat Trina's. "She's always been happy with you, I think because you took care of us. You've been there for us, and I know we've been hard on you…but we know the reason mom cared about you is because you cared about us."

"Yep. So don't think it's just because Dad's out of the picture that we're saying what we are now." Gary chuckled softly as Tori's words struck a chord in him. He'd always felt guilty for actively dating Holly while she was married. Even though it never went more than dates and his being supportive, he still felt terrible that he'd put her or her kids in a bad position. "Although it partly is…" She curled her finger and brought it to her lips, humming to herself. "I don't know what I'm trying to say."

Trina rolled her eyes and pat her knees. "What Tori's trying to say is Mom's right. You're the closest thing to a father figure we've ever had, dating or not. My therapist told me what makes a father…"

She stood up and walked over to the recliner. Gary folded his hands over his abdomen and looked to her with pride and care as she stepped behind him and leaned over the top of the chair.

"A father doesn't have to be blood. A father treats you with respect, they care about you no matter what. Maybe they're not perfect, but they'd do anything to protect you." Trina stood upright and looked towards Holly and Tori. "Watching my cousin Lucas with his daughter, or Uncle John-even Grandpa Paul, I see a mark of a good father in them. I see a look in their eyes that, well, has even been present in yours a few times over the years. A look that was in the eyes of my therapist's dad too. I didn't understand it until I saw it in his eyes at her wedding day…"

"Well." He pressed his lips together and moved his hands to his knees. "That's definitely true. I've always cared about you girls like you were my own. Even though it wasn't appropriate at times-"

"That's where you're wrong." Holly's interruption gave him a moment to pause. The woman walked over and knelt before him, taking his hand in hers and looking into his eyes. "Because of you, my daughters are able to stop and think, Gary. They don't judge other fathers because they know it's not impossible for one to be a good man and care." His heart beat heavily in his chest, and his eyes started to grow misty. "You're a good man, Gary, and you've _always_ been a good influence in my girls' lives. An affair that started three or four years ago does _not_ change the fact that you've been there for them through their entire lives."

"I always will be." He watched as Tori leaned over the arm of the couch and picked up a framed photo of a young girl. Holly frowned at the image and his eyes dropped down. The picture was aged and the child had on a pajama set with a cartoon character from the 1980s. "That's my daughter, Rebecca. She passed away when she was six years old."

Holly knew about the child, though Tori and Trina didn't know too much. The girls frowned at the image while Tori glanced up curiously. "She looks like Trina, when Trina was that age." Gary laughed once while Trina moved over to investigate.

"Hey she does look like me. Like we could be twins." Trina swept her hair back and gave Gary a concerned look. "What happened to her?" Rebecca was one of the reasons he'd grown so fond of Trina and Tori. They had the same eyes, the same smile.

"A bad man killed her, trying to get to me." He stood up slowly and reached over, taking the picture in his hand. "She was everything to me, and I couldn't protect her." Tears welled up in his eyes as he moved his hand up over his mouth, studying the picture of the child. "That's why I do my job, vowing to keep these criminals off the streets. Why I work so hard to make sure no one else has to lose a loved one, and those that do will see justice fulfilled."

"We ever remind you of her?"

Gary returned the frame to the table and nodded. "When you were a child, all the time. Even now, you two have the same look as she always did."

"Is that why you always cared about us? We reminded you of your daughter?"

"Partly. I didn't like seeing you in the situation you were in and I wanted to take care of you. Protect you and your mother, just never really knew how." He couldn't stand not being able to protect someone, or to save them. Whether it was his own daughter, Holly and her girls, or that Annabel girl, it killed him to think that he wasn't able to take care of them.

Now he could do something, he had the ability to put David away and keep him from being a threat to Holly and the girls. He just had to do it legally, but the cases he was investigating gave him a strong sense of hope that he could finally do something to protect them from that man.

"You'd never do anything to hurt us," Tori said with a whisper, "It's weird that I feel like I know you wouldn't. Our dad's still out there, but if he doesn't hurt us he could hurt somebody else…"

"He won't hurt anyone else."

"We heard that one of those people that he was accused of attacking…they died. That girl that was in the coma, she died didn't she?" Tori looked to the floor and Gary frowned. "It was on the news, they think Dad's the one that put her in the coma, that someone else was framed."

"Yes."

"And you, you're investigating it?"

"I am. If he's found guilty, he'll go to trial-to prison." A smile flickered on her face and she tore her eyes from the ground and up to him.

"At least he won't be able to hurt anyone else. We didn't come to talk about him, though. We just wanted to make sure you knew that we did want you to be a part of our lives. Maybe it'll take a while, but you don't have to rush, just…be there for us."

He smiled with reassurance. "I will be. You have my word on that." Tori walked over to him, looking back at him with tears in her eyes.

"Then thank you." She reached over, hugging him. He was startled at first, but slowly moved his arms up to hug her in response. He gave her a gentle pat on the back and looked down as she buried her face on his shoulder. He would do everything in his power to be there for them, and to keep them safe. Nothing would endanger them, this he was certain of.

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><p>We are getting to the final curtain, hopefully you liked that chapter. I'd like to think Gary is probably one of the more developed characters in this<p> 


	43. Justice on the Road to Recovery

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

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><p>Chapter 43 (Justice and the Road to Recovery)<p>

"Could you turn on the news?" It had been a couple of months, and Sam was more than pleased to see Trina, Tori and Holly recovering. It was a slow process, but they seemed to be progressing well. "Dad's hearing is televised, and they're coming out with the verdict today."

Trina seemed eager to know if her father would be kept off the streets now, though she'd informed Sam that it wouldn't matter much seeing as how he was now paralyzed. Tori and Holly were with her, both eager to see the court hearing as well. Although she wasn't keen on seeing it herself, she understood they may feel comfortable watching it with her present.

She flipped on the news channel and glanced over to see their reactions. Tori moved her hand over Trina's, squeezing it gently while resting her head on her mother's shoulder. Trina's face tensed, but her body seemed to be in a relaxed posture. "He hasn't been a part of our lives since we left him," Holly uttered in a low tone, "But this is still something we need to see."

"You'd rather watch here than the courthouse?"

"Yeah." Even though Gary was at the courthouse, they still felt more comfortable here. She knew some of how they were dealing with him, spending time every now and then, but not living with the man. "It still feels safer seeing behind the screen than to see that man in person."

Tori lifted her head and squinted at the screen as the lawyers spoke. "You know, he can't hurt us anymore. It still feels like he has some power over us." He did, but not much from what Sam could see. It was their fear of him that kept them in the position they were, but she'd seen them steadily branching out, and she was proud.

"It really does seem like you're doing much better now than you were when we first started. There's still a long way to go, but you're already doing great." The trio smiled at her, then looked to each other with cheerful expressions. Truly it had been their ability to work together in this process, and to communicate with one another that helped the most. They were willing to give this recovery a chance.

Even Trina, who'd been the most skeptical, had seen a lot of progress. Sam knew it was because they took risks where they needed to, and that allowed them to grow.

The women held each other's hands while Sam turned to the television screen. David was sitting with his defense attorney. The camera revealed Gary in the audience, watching David with a stern expression on his face. The prosecutor was organizing their folder and closing it.

The jury made their way in while Judge Robert Brotherton glanced from the papers on his podium. "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, have you reached a verdict?" Sam held her breath as the air in the room grew tense.

The jury consisted of seven women and five men. Four were elderly, three were young in appearance, and five were middle aged. As with a jury, Sam was well aware of legal jargon. If so much as one juror was undecided or declared innocent, it would mean a hung jury and David would walk free.

When she looked to the women, she could see that same terror in their eyes. Her own heart was racing, she wanted to see these women free and this man off the streets. Still, he'd been one of the most liked police chiefs in the city before this. However, the city council had voted Gary as his official replacement when the man exposed the corruption of prior chiefs.

A woman on the jury rose up with a sheet of paper in her hand. She had crow's feet at her eyes and frown lines around her lips. Her blonde hair fell around her shoulders, and her eyebrows had pushed up a wrinkle in between them.

"In the case of the State of California versus David Vega, we have reached a verdict." The woman lowered the paper and made eye contact with the Judge and spoke as though she'd already memorized it.

"Come on," Tori whispered. Sam glanced over to see Tori bury her face on her mother's shoulder. Holly reached up, placing her hand gently on the back of her daughter's head and kissed her on the top, then held her head in place. Holly's eyes closed and her body tensed. Trina kept her eyes on the screen and tightened her lips together.

"In the case against Annabelle Franklin we find the defendant guilty of sexual assault and second degree murder." The tension suddenly released in the room and Tori lifted her head slightly. Sam felt a wave of relief hit her, but kept her professionalism. "In the case against Juan Carlo. Guilty of aggravated assault."

With each name they called out, it was yet another guilty verdict. Holly cupped her hand over her face, breaking down with tears and relieved sobs. Sam watched David's right hand curl and his left hand reach up to cover his mouth. His eyes close and his attorney reached up to pat his back.

The list of crimes was long, including negligence, misconduct, and abuse of power. Granted the most damning was Annabelle Franklin, but all the other guilty verdicts were what Sam could consider the icing on the cake.

Judge Brotherton leaned back and adjusted the wire glasses on his face. "Does the jury have a recommendation?" It was always common for the judge to consider the jury's sentencing, and very rarely was their suggested sentence overturned.

The woman nodded and turned her powerful eyes onto David. Once more, Sam felt the tension in the air increase as Holly and her daughters held their breath. David crossed his arms and swayed backward in his chair. His glare darkened and his nostrils spread apart.

"Life." David's face fell and his head dropped. After a few seconds, his shoulders rose and he looked up to the man whom his fate rested in the hands of.

Sam glanced to the women. Holly's hand rested on her chest and she was leaning forward slightly. Trina's arms were crossed and her shoulders were sloping down. Tori's shoulders peaked upwards and her hand was clutching her mother's to the point that veins were popping from her own hand.

"In The State of versus David Vega, I will agree with the verdict and sentencing of the jury. You will be sentenced to life without the possibility of parole. You are to serve your term at the California State Prison."

From what she'd seen of the news reports, a lot of David's victims were sex offenders who'd been put into that same prison. It could be problematic for him there, but it was unlikely that anyone was concerned with the type of treatment he'd suffer in the prison.

"It's over," Holly uttered with a swift exhale, "It's…he's really gone." She closed her eyes and bowed her head as Trina turned her bitter gaze away from the television.

"I have nothing good I want to say about that man and what I hope happens to him in prison." Sam turned to Trina and furrowed her brow at the girl's words.

"Now would be a good time to discuss how this affects you three. How you feel about it."

Tori took a deep breath and swayed away from Holly. "To think that he can't hurt us anymore. We're free." She wiped the tears from her eyes and set her hand down on her knee. "And knowing Gary was so determined-a big part of it was to protect us. Also to do the right thing and bring dad's crimes to light without putting us in the spotlight…I didn't think anyone would do that for us."

"It's really hard to add onto that," Trina replied, "Tori's right. I feel relieved, safe, and well I don't have to be scared. I know the nightmares aren't over, I'll probably still suffer from flashbacks, but-" Trina started to choke up and rubbed the bottom of her neck with her hand. "Knowing he's behind bars. He can't hurt us, he can't hurt anybody else. I didn't know about Annabelle. It makes me sick with hatred to think that he would do something like that to someone else. All these years I thought it was just me and Tori."

Holly put her hand over Trina's and smiled through her tears. "She got justice. So did my babies. I know he wasn't charged with what he did to them, but just the fact that it was Gary that pushed it forward, I feel like my girls were granted the justice they deserved too."

Sam nodded and curled her lips up as Tori and Trina leaned onto their mother and hugged her. "This is a new step for us." Holly cleared her throat and looked towards the television screen. "We can work on ourselves without worrying about him coming after us."

"And it's a great step. I'm also hearing good things from you three in the relationship department." She glanced at Tori with a sly smirk. The girl's cheeks burned red and Sam crossed her legs. "I can't exactly discuss your progress there, Tori."

Tori had started to go out with Sam's cousin Jacob when he transferred to Los Angeles for college. It was surprising, especially considering it was Jake. Still, she couldn't judge and hoped that he would be good to the girl.

"We're taking it really slow," Tori admitted, "It's hard not to. I didn't tell him anything about Dad, but he understands that I'm not so good with relationships."

"I'm glad he is understanding."

Tori swept her hair over her ear and looked to her feet. "I know asking you for advice regarding things with him crosses some sort of ethical line-" Trina reached over and pat Tori on the leg, catching her attention and interrupting.

"Tori, take my advice on this. From personal experience, because I know I've talked to Jason about the things I've talked to Sam about in therapy-you'll likely talk to Jake eventually. So anything Sam tells you in regards to her opinion on how to handle your relationship with him, you'll probably talk to him about…so it's not the best idea, considering Sam is his cousin."

"I understand. I don't want to put her or Jake on the spot like that, either."

Holly looked from Trina to Tori and gave her daughter a slight smile. "Consider also the fact that you may have some relationship struggles with him. If you argue or anything like that, Sam may not want to be involved with that."

All of these were true, but fortunately Sam could still treat Tori as long as she could. "While I am certainly not able to address issues in that sphere due to ethics and personal issues, I am more than able to address any other concerns that you have. If you do find yourself with relationship struggles regarding Jacob, I will have to suggest a different therapist."

"I can agree with that," Tori remarked, "I just wanted to know if you thought Jacob would be able to be patient like Jason is with Trina. I thought, since you know him…"

Sam smiled at Tori and closed her eyes. From her own experience, Jake was fairly laid back and usually a good listener. He was Erica's son, and when the truth about her involvement in pornography broke out, and Erica started an uproar, it was Jacob that was trying to get his mother to tone down and to stop being a 'bitch'.

"In my opinion, Tori, I think you've got a man who is capable of listening, being understanding and showing you respect without blowing things out of proportion. Still, with any relationship, let it take time to grow. Be patient with yourself and trust yourself enough to see where it leads. Jacob isn't a perfect man, and I can't say yes or no on whether or not he's a good match for you. All I can say is give it time to see where it leads."

Tori's eyes lit up and the corners of her lips curved into a smile. "Thank you, Sam." She fidgeted her fingers and cleared her throat. "So I can still see you as my therapist?"

"Yes. For as long as you need, and as long as I am able." She knew it wasn't likely for her to stay in Los Angeles forever. Either she or Derek may eventually have to transfer, but she hoped to treat the girls and her other clients for as long as possible.

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><p>Yeah, if you recall the epilogue in the first Red Light, it's said that Sam and Derek were living in Texas when Carly's daughter was eight, so yes. Well this chapter is a great finality for the women. David's in Prison, all things are good with Gary and the girls, and even Tori's starting to develop a relationship. What are your thoughts on the going ons here?<p> 


	44. Handle With Care

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: This chapter is an issue-sensitive chapter. It's an important step in recovery, but at the same time the scene or issues discussed in here could potentially be triggering for anyone that may be coping from something similar to anything dealt with in this story. My advice, if that is the case, would be to skip this chapter. If you're fine with sexual content then that is okay. I am going to make this as clean as possible.

This is also where I'll tell you that I'm putting the next chapter up for those of you who wish to skip this chapter.

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><p>Chapter 44 (Handle with Care)<p>

"I don't get it," Jason remarked as he and Trina watched Dice attempt a comedy act. They were seated on the couch, with Jason's arm around Trina's shoulders. She was laughing at a joke Dice told about a four year old walking into a bar. "The kid sits at a bar, gets a glass of water from the bartender because his parent's in the restroom. What's the joke?"

Dice dropped his hands and Trina shoved Jason playfully. "The joke, Jason, is that the kid wouldn't leave the bar when the parent came out." He didn't usually laugh at many things, so it wasn't too much of a surprise, but Dice was running out of material and losing a bet he made with Trina on being able to get Jason to laugh.

"Oh. I get it." He scratched his ear and shrugged. "I guess it's amusing. Got anything else?"

"I'm losing it here," Dice muttered, "Laugh damn you, laugh!" Jason snorted and Trina shook her head. The boy scratched his hair and slouched. "Trina. Your boyfriend's boring and has no sense of humor. I give up."

Dice turned to walk away and stepped on a toy that a child that Trina was babysitting had left behind. Before she could warn him, he fell onto his back and erupted into a loud cry. Jason's lip curved into a smirk and he chuckled twice. Dice glared up at him with a groan and Trina shrugged. "Closest we're getting, Dice. Sorry."

The boy pulled himself up and rubbed his back, groaning loudly. "I'm going to need a medic at this rate." He made his way out of the house and slammed the door behind him. Jason puffed up his chest and shrugged. Trina's eyes turned to him and her lips curled up as she watched him sweep his hand through his hair.

"I'm mildly offended. I think I have a sense of humor. I thought it was hilarious how hard he was trying to get me to laugh." He looked at Trina and wagged his eyebrows. "Besides, I overheard you two making the bet on whether or not he could get me to laugh."

"Oh so you were holding back?"

"Yeah, but to be honest, there wasn't a whole lot that was funny." She rolled her eyes and moved her head down onto his shoulder. Her hand moved to his and rested gently on his leg.

They'd been together several months now, and the new year had come. Cat was out with Tori and the others, so it was just her and Jason. It wasn't the first time they were alone together, she managed to cross that bridge with him a few months ago when Cat went to drop a kid off at their parent's home, leaving Jason and Trina alone to chat for twenty minutes.

She became comfortable with him and trusted him not to hurt her, but still she had some reservations. As much fun as it was having Dice over, she was glad the boy was gone so she could talk to Jason in private about the thoughts that had been on her mind.

It was a strategic maneuver on her part, having Dice there to make jokes and lighten her mood so she wouldn't be so frightened to bring anything up with Jason. "Jason, I think we need to talk…"

He raised an eyebrow and looked to her with concern. "About? Is everything okay?"

"Yes. I just, I wanted you to know-" She closed her eyes and listened as her heartbeat sounded out into the air. "I know you and I have had sex before. At camp. I don't want you to think there's something wrong with you, or the reason I haven't wanted to do that has anything to do with my father…"

"I don't think either. I haven't brought it up either because I don't want to seem pushy. I don't expect that from you, only when you're ready." She lifted her head up and smiled into his eyes. Her smile faded away and her eyebrows furrowed.

"I just think I should be honest. The prostitution, everything seemed so normal to me and…I don't know, I wanted to feel something. I wanted to feel what I'd felt with you, but I never did. None of it ever felt right, and a part of me wants to know…if it I would feel that way with you again."

"What are you saying?" She squeezed his hand and held her breath.

"I'm scared. I'm scared to ask, scared of what you'll think of me, or if you think I'm too…I don't know. It seems like a stupid reason to get into something so, so-" A shudder fell from her lips and her body grew cold as she thought about the men and women she'd lain with.

"None of that bothers me, Trina. You know that." He reached his hand up and gently slid his fingers along her cheek. "You don't have to be afraid to talk to me, either." She turned her eyes into his and moved her hand up to grasp his.

She didn't know if it was him she was nervous about, or if it was the idea of sex, or lovemaking, as Sam defined it. She gave up on prostitution a long time ago, but the memories still haunted her, and she wanted to get away from those. "I don't want to be afraid of sex. Is that okay to say? I mean, I don't want to be too forward-"

"I think I understand."

"And you-we've been together long enough. You wouldn't degrade me, say dirty things to me or treat me like trash?"

"I love you." He pulled her hand down and continued to gaze into her eyes, warming her with his smile. "You're a woman deserving of respect. You're not dirty, you're not filthy, and you are certainly not trash. I would never do anything to degrade you." Trina felt her eyes water and slowly stood from the couch, pulling at his hands.

"I-Is there any good way to ask this?" Her stomach felt empty and her nervous lip tucked beneath her teeth as he rose to meet her. "Would you be careful with me?"

"Yes. I'll be right with you, and if you decide you don't want to do anything, then I will be fine with that." Her heart leapt to her throat and she leaned forward, kissing him gently on the lips. The feeling that resulted surprised her, it was like a fire that ignited in her soul. She'd kissed him before, and it always felt real to her, but now she was able to understand the love behind his kiss more than she'd done before.

They made their way into the bedroom where Trina made sure every light was on. She couldn't bear to do this in the dark. Too many times she'd had sex in the dark, and too many times she associated that with what her father had done to her in her childhood. The only difference between what he did and the men she slept with was the way he touched her, and how that touching never led to penetration of anything other than his fingers.

As she guided Jason to the bed, she sat beside him and felt her body trembling. "Can I lead, Jason?" She couldn't be sure if this was the appropriate way to ask, but judging by the sincere look in his eyes, she was able to take some amount of comfort in knowing he was listening to her.

"Of course."

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath to calm herself. Flashes of men and women came to mind and she shook them away the best she could. "I'm going to undress. I don't want you to watch right now."

"I'll turn away then."

"Thank you." She stood up as he turned around. Trina's eyes remained on him as she carefully removed her blouse and other clothing. Once naked, she covered her breasts with her right arm and her vagina with her left hand. A lump formed in her throat as a tremor shook through her body. "O-Okay. You can look now."

When Jason turned back around, his eyes met hers and his mouth turned to a reassuring smile. She let out an exhale and moved her arms down to her side, then pulled her wrists behind her back. "What do you think?" She wanted to close her eyes and look away, but she couldn't bring herself to do so out of her own anxiety.

Still, the hunger she'd seen in so many people wasn't present in Jason. This went beyond what she expected, surprising her. She made a slight step forward and pulled her hand up to sweep away the moistness in her eyelids. Her heart remained still as she anticipated his next words and prepared herself for an unexpected answer.

"I think that I am looking at a very beautiful woman with a strong heart and the courage to trust me with such a beautiful body." Her cheeks burned and a whimper fell from her trembling lips. "Are you okay?"

"I-most people just…" She was used to men and women tearing through whatever outfit she had on and pushing her down. No one took the time to look at her. What was familiar to her was that her first time with Jason, he _did_ take the time to admire her. He said she was beautiful before, but that was before she'd been defiled by so many. "How can you possibly still think I'm beautiful? The only thing clean about me is the fact that I don't have an STD…"

"Not true." Jason cleared his throat as Trina carefully sat beside him. "Beauty comes within, first of all. You're an attractive girl with a beautiful body, but the true beauty is in your heart and personality. That's what I love about you, getting to know who you are." Her nose crinkled and she felt her tears run down the sides of her face. "Nobody, and I repeat, nobody can ever take that away from you."

Trina leaned over to kiss him. She expected him not to be afraid to touch her, so she was happy to feel him hug her waist during the kiss. She pulled away breathlessly and looked down his body.

"I think I'm okay to continue, Jason, just…can I undress you?"

"Yes." She clenched her eyes and swallowed the lump in her throat.

"I want you to understand the reason." Her eyelids opened halfway and she glanced into his curious, loving gaze. "I might have some flashbacks, so I'm just trying to make this be…different than what I've gone through. I want it to be natural, but I don't want, you know-"

"I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. If there's a way to make this easier for you, I'm happy to oblige. Okay?" She wiped the tears from her eyes and nodded once.

"Thank you…"

Once she had him undressed, she asked him to lay on his back, which he did. She positioned herself between his legs, curling her legs beneath her and sitting on her knees.

He had a clean scent mixed with a light aftershave. His chest was firm and bare, and his six-pack was covered with mild hair. She held her hair and looked at his penis. It was long and erect. She looked into his eyes, holding his strong gaze as she carefully reached forward and embraced his erect member with her fingers.

The warmth startled her, causing her to pull her hand away momentarily before grasping it once more. Unwilling to go down on him right now, she moved her hand with a slow, up and down rhythm. It helped her not to be nervous towards this.

His jaw tightened and his lips curved into a gentle smile. "Jason, I don't mind foreplay. Most people just go right into the sex. Just, I have a couple things…I don't want you to be behind me, and I don't think I'm ready for fingering…" He sat upright and looked into her eyes, then nodded gently.

"You can trust me."

Her voice trembled as she moved onto her back and spoke with a whisper. "This has more to do with my dad, Jason." He furrowed his brow as she moved her arms over her chest. "He would come into my bed, I'd be on my side and he'd be behind me. Then he would-" Her throat burned and the image of her father flashed through her mind, causing a startled whimper to leave her lips.

"It's okay." Jason touched her hand and she looked up into his eyes. Her chest expanded as she inhaled and held onto her breath. "You're okay. He's not here."

She nodded once and watched as his hand moved along her arm, leaving a trail of sensation behind. He lowered himself and brushed his lips against hers, drawing a sharp breath. His hand then moved to her breast where he began to massage her.

Her body squirmed at his touch and she moved her arms around his neck, continuing to study his broad shoulders and muscular shape. Trina could feel her heart pounding as he continued to kiss her and fondle her breasts with a careful rhythm.

The longer he took, the more at ease she became. The blood in her body was rushing through her veins, racing to meet each location his lips caressed. After some time, he paused to gaze into her eyes and brush her hair from them. A quivering gasp drifted from her lips as she studied the compassion and love in him.

"You have the most beautiful eyes, Trina." She moved her hands down to his upper arms, then leaned upright to kiss his lips. A deep blush rose to her cheeks as she pulled away and fell back onto the pillow.

She struggled to catch her breath while her mind continued to spin. She was ready to let him inside, but she was still nervous. It was a large and frightening step for her, but if she didn't try, she didn't know if she would ever be ready.

"I won't do anything you're not ready or willing to do. You know that." His brow furrowed and Trina smiled at him.

"I-I know. I'm ready, I just-I'm nervous. Go slow…"

"Should I grab a condom?"

"Y-no." She didn't know how long it would take for him to put one on, and with her nerves, she didn't want to sit there and watch or wait for him to get one on. "Next time, whenever that is…I want to get through this."

"Okay."

"Please don't worry about anything. If I'm uncomfortable, I'll tell you to stop." She held her breath and looked down, watching as he lowered himself. As his tip touched the lips of her vagina, she clenched her eyes and tensed herself. The second she felt the sensation start to fade she spoke up. "Keep going. I'm okay…" She released her breath and tightened her arms around his neck.

Thinking fast, she kissed his lips as he entered into her. The sensation shot through her body, causing her to shudder. She moved her head to his shoulder, whimpering as the movement inside her generated waves of sensation that pulsed throughout her body.

Pressing her chest against his, Jason's heartbeat comforted hers and joined the beat of her heart in a harmonious union. She let her body relax and gasped out at the warmth now spreading across her. He was not cold as so many felt, nor was he rough.

What she felt with him was nothing like the first time she was with him, but better as her emotions and her heart rose up with the occasion. When she looked in his eyes, she could see just how focused and determined he was, but also how much love he held for her.

She slid her hand to his cheek and let the tears in her eyes flow freely. For the first time since the last time she was with him, this act was real.

Her eyes closed and she moved her head back, groaning as the sensation grew stronger inside of her. "Don't stop. This feels…right."

When they finished, they lay with their bodies pressed against one another and their arms around each other. She gazed at him as he ran his fingers through her hair. It was the simple fact that he remained there with her after finishing that amazed her further.

She told him to keep it inside when he was about to release, she'd been haunted by the visions of the men who pulled out only to ejaculate on her, so she didn't want to risk having that happen to her again. She kept track of her biological calendar and still continued to take birth control even after she stopped prostitution, so she was certain there wasn't a risk of pregnancy.

Still, she felt braver after having had sex with him, but more importantly than anything else, she felt something real, something she wanted to feel again with him.

It would take time, but she knew now that she was strong enough to handle this. "Jason?" She kissed his chin and nuzzled her head into his neck. His strong arms embraced her waist and she closed her eyes, exhaling softly as her heart mixed once more with his.

"Yes?"

"I'm starting to understand what Sam talks about, what you say, and well…I don't know. The feeling that I get. What I see between Uncle John and Aunt Bethany, or Luke and Madison…even Mom and Gary." She pulled her head back and turned her eyes to his, smiling as his gaze drew her in and melted her into his arms.

"How's that?"

"I…" Her heart pounded heavily in her chest and her body seemed to vibrate with each pulse while the blood rushed to her cheeks. "I love you." His eyebrows curled up and he smiled back at her.

"I love you too."

"Don't leave me…and don't let go."

"I won't." She curled her fingers around his arm and slid her knees up to curl into a ball. This was the first time she truly felt safe, warm, and cared for by another man. It was a feeling she never wanted to lose. So long as he remained with her, she was certain to hold onto this feeling she had.

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><p>It is a huge step forward, but obviously you understand that this is not the end of her recovery (same for the family as of last chapter) because recovery takes years. However, to be able to trust someone like this is indeed a step in that direction.<p> 


	45. The Final Session

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

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><p>Chapter 45 (The Final Session)<p>

Sam held up her completed thesis with great satisfaction, feeling as though it were worth more than the completed degree she received. After all this time, she'd seen many clients come and go, and had many success stories to share. Each client was no better or worse off than the next, but she valued still the Vega family as her first and most successful yet.

"It's a great job," Trina complimented with a smile while sitting across from Alice and Sam. The girl swept her hair over her shoulder and curled her eyebrows upwards. "Speaking of things completed, I actually got a certificate of teaching." Trina's lips spread wide. "While finishing my bachelor's, I can teach elementary level and Pre-K."

"Now there's something to be proud of." Sam leaned forward and exchanged a high-five. She was thrilled for Trina; the girl had come so far. "And Tori's been making good grades as well?"

"Oh yeah, though I've pushed her a little. So has mom." Trina folded her arms and smirked. "She can slack off a little, though she won't admit to it. She knows what she wants to do, which I think is amazing." The girl raised her shoulders and breathed in. "Veterinarian. She wants to work with animals."

"A great plan. How are things with your mother and Gary?"

Trina's fingers tapped her forearm and she leaned towards the right. "They are…" Her smile increased and she unfolded her arms. "Engaged." Sam laughed happily and Alice gave a brief cheer. The hurricane was over, but now it was just time to pick up the pieces.

She never thought she could feel so great of accomplishment, but each time she heard a client tell her how great their lives were turning out to be, that sense of accomplishment only grew.

"Oh! I should probably tell you this." Trina took another deep breath and tucked her hair over her ear. "It's about Jason." Sam folded her hands in her lap and pursed her lips as Trina looked to the ground contemplatively before glancing back up. "We um, we had sex."

Her eyebrows darted up and she moved a finger up to her chin. "Tell me how that went." She watched the girl brush her arm and look away momentarily. There was a serene look in her eyes as her lips started to tilt upwards. "Also, when was this?"

"About two weeks ago." Their sessions were no longer once a week, but every two or three weeks. The same was said of Holly and Tori, and that was a great thing because it meant not only progress, but that the clients were able to rely on their own strengths. "I was nervous…but it was okay. He was, well-amazing." Trina looked back and brushed her hands along her knees.

"I know I've told you bits and pieces about what it was like for me in prostitution, and about what Dad did. It was really difficult for me to get past a lot of that for the longest time, but I think with Jason, we can work on that."

"I agree."

"I'm not ready, you know." Trina moved her hands into her lap and curled her fingers inwards. "To be touched around my thighs or my vagina. Jason understands that. I can handle penetration, but not when it comes to hands. I also need the lights on." Trina crinkled her nose and let the corners of her mouth fall. "When I was a kid growing up, Dad would come into my room at nights-usually drunk off his ass."

Sam straightened her back and nodded as the girl's eyes drifted into hers. The fear was no longer present in Trina's eyes. There was a calmness to them as she was able to retell a memory, painful as it was. "He would get into my bed, usually on the side that I wasn't facing." Her voice trembled and she cleared it away. "I'd say it didn't feel right when he'd touch my private parts."

Her eyelids closed over and she shook her head. Sam could see a vein bulging from the surface of Trina's hand. "He'd push his fingers…I'd ask him to stop, call out for mom, even Tori. It-It felt like it would never end." Trina's eyes opened and tears formed at her cheekbones. "This went on for years. It was actually a year or two before I realized he was doing the same thing to Tori."

"That man can no longer hurt you."

"No, I know." Trina chuckled sadly and rubbed her arm. "You know, as a prostitute, it wasn't any better. Men, and even women would come in and they'd just force me up against a wall or onto the bed. They only wanted sex, and they'd tear away my clothes…" She scrunched her face and scoffed. "Sometimes I can still _smell_ the filth of those people that I went down on. I can taste them, feel them-and you know that's not even the most degrading thing they'd do to me?"

Sam closed her eyes, remembering her own history. Some of the worst feelings she felt was the feeling of the men ejaculating onto her, so much as on her face. It was disgusting, and she would spend hours in the shower and still feel like their fluids were still in her hair and on her body.

"When I was in pornography, Trina, I had a lot of men release on me." Trina's eyebrows moved inwards and her lips pressed together as she replied with a firm nod. "Of all the horrifying things I've had done to me, that was the worst."

Trina leaned forward and clasped her hands together. "That's what they'd do to me, right before or after saying I was just-just a filthy prostitute. That it was something I _wanted_." Trina bowed her head and clenched her eyes. "I'd lay there for the longest time after they were gone, crying my eyes out before being able to get up."

The girl leaned upright and her eyes flicked into Sam's. "It's in the past, but it still hurts-still affects me. When I had sex with Jason, I was actually afraid to let him pull out because I didn't want that stuff on me. I'd rather it be inside where I can't see it or feel it on any part of my body."

"And you're okay with this?"

"Let me clarify, I'm okay with Jason." Trina crossed her legs and looked towards the window. "I mean, it's something I've got to deal with. Most men that paid for me to have sex would use a condom, those that didn't were the ones that would-" She put her hand to her throat and coughed once before clearing it away. "You know."

"Yes, I do."

"There were a couple that didn't care. And with Jason, we're going to use condoms but I'm a little nervous because they feel really gross. I don't really know when the next time we'll have sex or anything, I just…I wanted to know if it would feel the same with him."

"And did it?"

"Better." Sam almost cheered for the girl. Trina moved her hands up and swept her hair behind her. The girl breathed in quickly and leaned back against the couch. "It was real. He took it slow, he was gentle and understanding, and every time I looked in his eyes…there was that emotion, that feeling. Love. I could see that he loved me. No hunger, no lust, just compassion, and I think that made it a little easier."

"I'm glad to hear that." It didn't mean that recovery was complete for Trina, she still had a ways to go, but at this point Sam was happy to see that she was truly out of the storm. "And what have you and your family thought about in regards to your father? Any thoughts?"

"Not really. I mean, every now and then there's something, like Tori might bring him up or something. Overall I think we've decided to move on from him. We talk as a family and tell each other how we're feeling about things, and that includes him, if he's thought about. A lot of that anger's gone, but there's still that lack of trust. I think we're fine with him being where he's at in prison where he can't do anything else to hurt us."

"Then you are recovering the best way possible. With your family, with friends. I couldn't be happier for you." Trina smiled and her eyes lit up with joy.

"It'll be sad to see you go, but at least we still have Alice."

"Yeah." Derek had been ordered to transfer back up to Washington. It wasn't in Seattle, but a city near it. Sam was happy she'd be next to Carly for a few years, but it meant transferring a lot of her clients over to Alice or one of the other counselors here.

Sam glanced to her mentor and supervisor, smiling as the woman leaned back and gazed back in confidence. "You're in capable hands, Trina. However, I think you and your family have made tremendous bounds. Even though I'm leaving, I can do so feeling like I've really done some good."

"You have. I, you know, for as reluctant as I was at the start…I'm really glad that I came to you." Trina smiled at her and stood up. Sam rose with her and felt her heart leap up as the girl gave her a tearful hug. "Thank you for everything. You don't know just how much you really helped us."

Sam pat the girl's back and let her own tears roll along her face. "Keep visiting with Alice, keep working on yourself and with your family." She pulled back and pat the girl's arms while looking with reassurance in her eyes. "It's taken some time, but you've made it this far."

"I like to think that a part of the reason I'm still here is because of you." Trina wiped her eyes and looked from Sam to Alice. "Both of you, really. But you were the one that initially pushed, you didn't give up on me or on my family. Anyone else would have given up."

"Well, I'm not anyone else."

"No." Trina shook her head and laughed once. "I guess not. You're more than just a counselor, you're a friend, and I appreciate that. I bet all your clients do, and all your future clients will."

"Thank you, Trina."

"Right. Well." The girl wiped her eyes once more and glanced to Alice. "I'll call my next session in, Alice." Alice nodded and returned a warm smile for Trina. As the girl walked out, Alice rose and met Sam with tears in her own eyes.

"You've really matured as a counselor, Sam. I'm almost sad to see you go, but it is your duty." Sam faced her mentor and friend with a proud smile. This woman raised her up from the dirt, whether she knew it or not.

"I wanted to give all my clients what you gave me."

"What's that?" Alice crossed her arms and tilted her head as she looked on with pride.

"Hope." The woman dropped her arms and Sam breathed in slowly. "I guess my work here is done. I'll have a lot of clients in the future, wherever I end up. If it's Seattle or even Texas, but I'll never forget you. Beside Derek's father, you're really the first person to give me a chance. You know, if I have a daughter, I'm going to name her after you."

Alice chuckled and closed her eyes. "I'm honored. You've been a great member on the staff here. You'll be a great addition wherever you go. I wish you the best of luck, Samantha." Alice cleared her throat and motioned to the door. "Why don't you go to the lounge before cleaning up, the other counselors here would like to say goodbye as well."

"Alright." Sam hurried out and Alice remained behind for a few seconds. The woman made her way to the doorway and set her hand over the light switch while looking back to the desk.

"And my work is done as well." With tears in her eyes, she turned off the light and stepped outside.

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><p>I wanted to say its the end of Sam's story, but that would be incorrect, it's the end of a chapter in her life. Also, we know of her epilogue, therefore the last chapter which is next, will be Trina's epilogue. It's the end of the road.<p> 


	46. Somebody's Hero

Red Light Duex

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N: The final chapter, I hope you'll like it. While this tale was more for Sam, we should still also see how Trina ended up. Though this won't be your standard epilogue, we'll see that perhaps Sam's impact still remains.

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><p>Chapter 46 (Someone's Hero)<p>

_"Momma, something's wrong with Amelia."_ The words of ten year old Rachel were fresh in Trina's mind even three weeks later as she observed the students in her fifth grade classroom. Amelia was the small blonde who sat next to Trina's eldest child. The two girls had been close friends since the third grade, so she knew the child well.

As she faced her class of twenty, she saw each of them gazing up eagerly, anticipating the hour. This was the time they read a chapter out of a selected book and discussed it. Last week they'd been reading _Where the Red Fern Grows_, and this week they were reading _Black Beauty._ A lot of the best literature were the older classics, so Trina insisted on teaching her students these great works of art.

"Mrs. Tyler?" Amelia's voice caught her attention and she glimpsed at the girl. She saw Rachel's eyes grow with concern as the child spoke in a meek tone and shifted in her seat. "I need to go to the restroom. May I go?"

"You may. Let Rachel go along with you, okay Amelia?" She preferred her students use the buddy system, if only to teach them to rely on one another. Amelia nodded and left the classroom with Rachel.

Trina turned to the chalkboard where she had the date written, it was fall of 2027, and eleven o'clock in the morning. "Alright class, we'll have to begin reading so we can finish the chapter before lunch." While she was greatly concerned about Amelia, she needed to teach her class. She had her eyes on the girl, however, because a lot of her behavior mechanisms were terribly familiar to her.

Even thirteen years later, Trina still felt the terrors of her own childhood traumas inflicted by her father. They weren't as great or painful as they used to be, nor did they cause her a night of sleep, but she still had moments where Jason would have to console her. Still, spending time with her daughter and her son always helped. Over time she learned that her own experience aided her in being able to detect and notice certain symptoms in children that might give way to abuse.

Sadly, she had a bad feeling about Amelia and hoped her suspicions were wrong. Things had become so politically correct these days that she could hardly act on her suspicions without risk of being sued by a parent. Still, if there was anything, she wasn't going to let it continue.

"Should we wait on Rachel and Amelia, Mrs. Tyler?" Trina turned her head and smiled politely.

"I'm sure they will be back shortly." She picked up the book from her desk and paused to smile at the family photo gazing back to her. She had Rachel and Joshua in her arms while Jason's arms were spread around his entire family.

She turned wistfully and moved her chair directly in front of the class, then took a seat. Her eyes darted to the clock, marking the time while she opened the book.

The occasional student of hers would skip out when they got permission to go to the restroom, but it wasn't often. Rachel was good about returning as soon as possible, so there was no fear of time slipping away.

There was a paper that also concerned her which she picked up from Amelia's desk. It was a drawing which was sexually explicit in nature of a hairy monster embracing a young child. At the child's feet were a pair of wings that were surrounded by a pool of tears.

As she put the drawing out of her mind and read the chapter, her eyes would continually glance at the clock. The more time passed, the more her heart sped up. Even her students had taken to looking for the time, considering this was too unlikely for either child.

Reaching the end of the chapter, she closed the book and set it in her lap. "Okay class, who can tell me-" She paused when she heard a hushed whisper from the doorway. Rachel's head was poking through and her eyes were filled with worry. Trina furrowed her brow and stood up slowly. "Hold on students."

She made her way to her daughter and found herself being tugged out of the classroom. "Something's wrong with Amelia, Momma." Rachel looked over her shoulder and whined. "She can't pee. I tried to talk to her and she's just staring at the wall, she started crying a few minutes ago too."

"Is she still in the restroom?" Trina moved her hand over her chest and looked down the hall as a deep fear began to rise up. "Have you noticed anything else lately that's different about Amelia?"

"She hasn't been eating either. What do you think is wrong, momma? Is Amelia going to be okay?" A lump formed in her throat and she glanced to two teachers walking down the hall. One was Mr. Walker, a sixth grade teacher, and the other was Mrs. Arnold, a fellow fifth grade teacher. "Momma?"

"Rachel sweetie, go into the classroom. I need you to remain calm for me, okay?" Rachel's face twisted into sorrow and she slowly nodded, then moved into the class. The teachers spotted Trina and stopped as she signaled to them. "Michael, I need you to take over for me. Linda, come with me."

She'd shared her suspicions with the two, so they understood what was going on. Michael moved to the classroom while Trina rushed to the restroom with Linda. When they arrived, Amelia was sitting with her back against the bathroom stall and her face buried into her hands.

"Amelia?" She knelt carefully as the girl threw her head up and whimpered. Trina heard Linda mention something about the toilet and glanced over, grimacing upon seeing a bit of blood in the urine. "Amelia sweetheart, let's go to the nurse, okay?"

"Don't call my daddy, Mrs. Tyler. I don't want to call my daddy." Trina paused for a second, then scooped the child up. Amelia put her arms around her neck and buried her face into her shoulder. "Rachel says I can't go home with her after school because her family's going to visit her grandparents."

"That's right."

"I want to go with you. Please." Trina exchanged a concerned look with Linda, then proceeded to carry the child to the nurse's office, listening to the child's painful cries for her to take her with the family.

She hurried into the nurse's office where the woman instantly rushed to the child's side. "There's blood in her urine, Helen." She watched as Amelia curled into a ball and buried her face into her knees. "I um, I also suspect abuse…" She removed the girl's drawing and showed it to Helen. The nurse promptly covered her mouth and took the drawing to her counter.

"I'll take care of this, Trina. Thank you." Trina started to head back, but her concern for Amelia was the more pressing matter. She heard the girl's whimpers and walked to the blue bed. As she knelt, the child's eyes darted to hers.

"Don't leave Mrs. Tyler. Don't call my daddy." Trina grabbed a tissue and wiped away the tears staining Amelia's cheeks.

"It's okay, you're going to be alright." From what she knew of the girl, her father was the only caregiver. Rachel mentioned Amelia having grandparents nearby, but that she hadn't seen them since her mother passed away a year ago. "Listen. Amelia." Trina took the child's hand and frowned as the girl scrunched her face. "We're going to have to call somebody."

"Don't call daddy!" Amelia's scream echoed off the walls, startling both the nurse and Linda. Trina remained calm, recognizing the anger as yet another sign. "I said no! I don't want daddy!"

"Shh, it's okay sweetie. Rachel says you have grandparents, would you like for us to call them?" Amelia's face dropped and she let out a whimpering cry while leaning against Trina. "You can talk to me, okay? I'll listen."

"You don't understand. I don't want daddy. I don't want it, I said I don't." Trina hugged the child and closed her eyes as Amelia trembled. She shook her head, recalling her own sexual abuse.

Seeing her daughter's friend in such a shape caused her a great deal of grief. She would have to be careful, but she'd find a way to protect this child. "Amelia. If you need to tell me something, I'll understand." She pulled herself back and the girl wiped her nose. After signaling for the nurse and Linda to get the principal and campus police officer, she remained there with the child. "Listen…when I was your age, my daddy hurt me too."

Amelia's eyes grew large and she started to shake her head. "No. Why? You're too nice and pretty. I'm not pretty anymore."

"You are, and I'll take that as a compliment by the way." Trina smiled and the girl nodded once.

"Did-Did your daddy…momma died and daddy comes into my room." Trina held her breath and pressed her lips together while listening to the girl. "He-He says I make him feel better. I don't like it when he touches me, Mrs. Tyler. It doesn't feel good and it scares me." Amelia trembled and shook her head once more. "Don't make me go back to daddy, please! He says I shouldn't tell anyone because they'll take me away, and he doesn't want me to be with Grandma because she'll take me from him."

"Your grandma is your mother's mom?"

"Yes…"

Trina took a deep breath as tears formed in her eyes. "How long has your father been doing this, Amelia?" Amelia turned her head down and ran her fingers across her face.

"Since the end of fourth grade. During the summer…"

"Okay." She looked over her shoulder to see that the principal and officer had arrived with Linda and the nurse. Her body trembled as she rose up and turned to them.

"M-Mrs. Tyler?" Trina looked back to the girl and swallowed as Amelia pointed to her thigh. "Daddy puts his hand here, I don't like it. A-Are you going to take me away from my daddy?"

She smiled reassuringly and the girl started to relax. "You won't have to go back to him, I'll call your grandmother if you like." She was happy that, at the least, they caught this sooner than later. Any longer and Amelia would likely withdraw and refuse to talk about this.

It was not long before Amelia's grandmother had arrived. The child protective services had been called in along with the police. Currently Amelia was curled up in her grandmother's lap. The old woman was crying as she spoke with the social worker.

Trina had to step outside to catch her breath. She was fighting off a wave of nausea and the memories of her childhood. Nothing pleased her more than being able to save this girl from enduring that hell she'd endured, though.

The man walked into the school and Trina knew the look in his eyes within an instant. She stepped before the door to the office, certain not to let this man anywhere near the child. "Miss, I need to see my daughter." The man swept his hand through his dark, curly hair and peered at her with pale blue eyes.

"I know that look." A sneer spread across her face as the man's eyes burned into hers. "To this day, I still don't know how a father can touch his daughter."

"What? How can you know tha-I mean, I don't think that is any of your business."

"You have the same look my father did-and yes it is my business. I'm a teacher, I have a duty to report scum like you." She pointed to the right where a police officer was walking. The man froze as the officer removed a pair of handcuffs.

"Mr. Walsh? You're under arrest."

The door opened behind Trina and Amelia stepped out with her grandmother and the social worker. Amelia clutched her grandma's leg while the woman stared at her son-in-law with a stern and bitter expression.

"Amelia?" Mr. Walsh looked at his daughter and tears started to form in his eyes. "Amelia, daddy loves you." Trina's stomach churned and bile shot up her throat. She swallowed it down as the officer guided the man away.

Amelia's grandmother gazed down at her granddaughter and smiled at her. "Don't you worry honey, I won't let anything happen to you." Trina managed to overhear the social worker discuss the high chance of the grandmother being able to take Amelia in as her legal guardian.

Trina turned around and was taken by surprise as Amelia hugged her leg. "You'll be safe now," Trina whispered. "And when everything is said and done, Rachel will still be around to be your friend." The girl flashed a bright grin and tightened her hug.

The grandmother looked to Trina with gratitude and placed a strong hand to her shoulder. "Mrs. Tyler? Amelia says you're her teacher. Thank you…thank you for looking after my grandchild. I…" The woman's voice broke and she tore her misty eyes down to the young girl. "I cannot believe that Jeremy-no, I don't want to think about that. Thank you."

She heard someone call out and turned to see Rachel walking out of the hallway and into the main area. She had her purple backpack on and was looking with great concern at her friend. "Amelia! Amelia, are you okay?" Amelia pulled away from Trina and hurried over to Rachel, taking her friend in a hug.

"I'm going to get to stay with Gramma. Mrs. Tyler helped…" Rachel hugged Amelia back and looked up to Trina with a smile. There was a flicker of joy and pride in the young girl's eyes. When Amelia turned to look at her, she had the same gleam.

"Momma always knows how to make me feel better. I told you she could help you, Amy." Trina chuckled through a single light sob and cleared her throat. After a few minutes, Amelia left with her grandmother and the social worker. Trina knelt before her daughter and raised an eyebrow at her.

"You told Amelia I could help her with something, Rachel?" It was unlikely the girl knew anything about Amelia's situation, but she wouldn't be certain. So early on, even Trina would have tried to seek help from a best friend before things got worse.

"You've always been my hero, momma, so I thought you could help Amelia."

"I'm no one's hero, sweetie." She laughed once and thought back to Sam, the first therapist she ever worked with. Now that was a hero if ever there was one, and on occasion she wondered how she was doing. Even Tori didn't know too much aside from the fact that Sam and Derek transferred to Texas. Jacob didn't spend a lot of time with his cousin, it was hard as life and distance got in the way, after all.

"You said somebody saved you once a long time ago. Whenever I watch television, all the heroes save somebody because they were saved."

"Well, I suppose that's one way to look at it." She just wanted to ensure that no child had to go through what she went through, and today, that goal was achieved. Maybe she was a 'hero', even though she still felt like a simple teacher for the most part. "How about we get home before your dad gets off work?"

"Oh yeah, it's your turn to make dinner!" Rachel grabbed Trina's hand and walked out of the school with her. "Can I help you cook?"

"Of course. I love you, baby."

"Love you too momma." She held her head high and took a deep breath as she turned her eyes to the blue skies above her. Her life could not get much better than this. Of course her own daughter must have a point, because it was in Rachel's eyes that she saw in her own reflection the woman and mother she always dreamed of being. In the end, even her daughter was her hero.

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><p>That's it folks. The end. Thank you to all who stuck around and gave some good feedback, nothing I enjoy more than hearing your input as it helps me to improve on future works. Hope you liked the last chapter, and I hope to see you around in the future<p> 


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